GTP Cool Wall: Chrysler Town & Country

Its only saving grace is the ridiculous 7.2L engine option, which just bumps it up the "uncool".

And yes, I want stats! : p

Sub zero. I love people who underestimate station wagons. I love to blow doors off other cars with them. "Oh you got a station wagon? Things gotta be mad slow yo." *Lines up* *proceeds to smoke other guy not in the wagon*

Boat loads of torque, good towing capability, holds 9 people comfortably, rides smooth and in style...what's not to love?

Absolutely sub zero for me.

350hp in a 7.2L V8. It's a meh for me. Don't love it, don't hate it.

I don't like old wagons like this. The only station wagon I really, really liked was the Dodge Magnum. I freaking loved that car. Red with white racing stripes looked awesome.

It's a bit pathetic. Sure it's old, and cars generally age well, but this isn't one of those times. Unnecessarily large engine with so little output, and they were pretty much ugly for all of it's 7 or 8 generations. But hey, it's Chrysler! What do you expect?

doodlemonoply

350hp in a 7.2L V8. It's a meh for me. Don't love it, don't hate it.

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Yeah? about about 410 lb-ft of torque at a low rpm. Roasts the tires under 3,000 rpm half throttle. Don't forget times were different.

I'm sorry but wagons are not cool, no matter what the rear wheel drive manual wagon fanboys on Jalopnik would have you know. Wagons symbolize nerds or moms, and neither of those are a particularly desirable group to be associated with. Even if you don't care what other people think, it's just not an attractive body style, unless it's an E34. SUVs are the way to go, I think. The fact that they piss off so many car enthusiasts just seals the deal. Wood on the exterior isn't cool either. But still, it's got nice body lines, and 350 horsepower at the time really isn't that bad. Of course, these ratings are probably gross horsepower. Switch over to SAE net horsepower and it might start to seem a little unimpressive. Don't particularly like the car, don't dislike it though, so meh.

It's essentially a minivan before there were minivans that was used in the 60's for goofy looking dads to take their ungrateful kids on long road trips to see the world's largest toaster and other wonderful tourist traps of the day.

I can't think of anything redeeming about the car either, it look hideous, the engines aren't impressive or unique, and it's not iconic. I'd also assume people that drive it are exactly like Clark Griswold.

Went with Seriously Uncool for this one.

Some wagons are laughable, some just take up space, this one doesn't. I look at this, and it doesn't fill me with dread like others do. It doesn't scream anything, but it exudes an understated confidence to me.

Cool.



Edit: OK, for those who think wagon=uncool, what do you think of this?



This is the Newport Sedan, there was also a coupe, and it is the T&C with a boot.

Slashfan

Sub zero. I love people who underestimate station wagons. I love to blow doors off other cars with them. "Oh you got a station wagon? Things gotta be mad slow yo." *Lines up* *proceeds to smoke other guy not in the wagon*

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I'm sure that would have been well and dandy in the 60s. This is 2013.

An actual minivan T&C with a V6 can beat the 440c.i. V8.

Seriously Uncool.

Seriously Uncool, It's massive, it's extremely boring to look at plus it has faux-wood trimming.

Meh. Quite bland design, offering no flair to hook the viewer into it. Not helping that the color options left a lot to be desired as well. Only real things saving it is the practicality, making it an awesome road trip car or cruiser. Would look pretty cool slammed.

Doog

I'm sorry but wagons are not cool, no matter what the rear wheel drive manual wagon fanboys on Jalopnik would have you know. Wagons symbolize nerds or moms, and neither of those are a particularly desirable group to be associated with.

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While that may be true...

These would like a word with you.

SVX

While that may be true...

These would like a word with you.

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None of those do anything for me. Audi wagons are especially uncool to me because their fanbase makes them overrated. Would much rather have a Q5 or a Q7. The Legacy's alright because it's not the dorky Outback. That Chrysler Newport above looks a lot nicer in sedan form though. Looks like a Lincoln Continental, not that that's bad.

Sub. Zero.

I'm also totally appalled by the people who say they'd rather have an AWD SUV than a station wagon. Those SUVs are even clumsier and more hoggish than an equivalent wagon to no good effect, and they still can't go off-road that well because apparently body-on-frame construction and real, part-time, center differential-free 4WD are too manly for the modern buyer.

So, my message is: if you need a car that can haul large numbers of people and a large amount of cargo simultaneously, but you don't anticipate ever tackling anything more challenging than a potholed dirt road, buy one of the few remaining station wagons, or just a minivan. If you do need off-road ability, buy one of the few remaining body-on-frame 4x4 SUVs. Attempting to combine wagons/minivans with SUVs just results in tragic, useless road hogs often driven by people who actually care about the constant changes in clothing fashion.

Doog

None of those do anything for me. Audi wagons are especially uncool to me because their fanbase makes them overrated. Would much rather have a Q5 or a Q7. The Legacy's alright because it's not the dorky Outback. That Chrysler Newport above looks a lot nicer in sedan form though. Looks like a Lincoln Continental, not that that's bad.

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I completely disagree. The RS6s/RS4s Avant are almost the exact same as standard ones but with extra storage capacity, which means they are incredibly potent, especially the legendary RS2 (though not the best example of a sexy wagon, the rear does look a bit awkward).

I wouldn't mind a Q7 as a daily. How ever, a must would be getting the S line wheels. The base ish Q7s just look hideously bland and boring without them.

But that's for another topic.

White & Nerdy

Sub. Zero.

I'm also totally appalled by the people who say they'd rather have an AWD SUV than a station wagon. Those SUVs are even clumsier and more hoggish than an equivalent wagon to no good effect...

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I don't know about you but I don't find an SUV to be too bad to drive. Sure it's big and a bit scary, but that just makes it more interesting. Of course the equivalent wagon (as long as it's not the Excursion-sized Caprice) will be sportier and more livable, but it's a wagon, and that's enough to turn most people off of it.

White & Nerdy

...and they still can't go off-road that well because apparently body-on-frame construction and real, part-time, center differential-free 4WD are too manly for the modern buyer.

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Are you criticising the fact that few modern SUVs are built to go offroad, or that few buyers of modern SUVs actually take them offroad? If it's the latter, I don't see why it should bother you. I have a neighbor who bought an SVT Raptor several months ago. So far I've seen it muddy once. Does that bother me? Of course not, it's his money, and if an SVT Raptor he doesn't plan to offroad constantly makes him happy, so be it.

White & Nerdy

So, my message is: if you need a car that can haul large numbers of people and a large amount of cargo simultaneously, but you don't anticipate ever tackling anything more challenging than a potholed dirt road, buy one of the few remaining station wagons, or just a minivan. If you do need off-road ability, buy one of the few remaining body-on-frame 4x4 SUVs. Attempting to combine wagons/minivans with SUVs just results in tragic, useless road hogs often driven by people who actually care about the constant changes in clothing fashion.

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A lot of people (non enthusiasts of course) don't like the image of a wagon, and that's reason enough to go and buy the nearest Suburban. If they can afford the fuel costs and don't mind risking causing a small accident every time they have to park, so be it.

Voted "Meh". Simply because it's pretty plain, I like some estates (or wagons if you're American) personally but this is just a big, family car with reasonably plain looks.

The 440 engine brings it up slightly: 375hp SAE Gross isn't too bad (probably about 300ish net), but it's all about that torque since it's a street car. Plus, because it's designed for useable torque, if you really wanted to give it some more 'get up and go' simple bolt-ons would easily bring it above 400hp.

But at the end of the day it's still a fairly bland and plain car. Therefore "Meh" sums it up perfectly. 👍

It's a wagon with a V8. But it's also a Chrysler. Meh.

The Ford and GM wagons were the trend setters and innovators. This was always an also-ran.


Uncool.

It's a "Meh" from me. I like big wagons a bit as they're spacious and practical but this old Chrylser has many things wrong: ridiculously underpowered from such a big engine, performance and handling are likely from a cross channel ferry, and the wood is meant to go on the inside, not outside.

More modern wagons are so much better and make better sleepers.

Ridiculous amounts of hideous wood paneling on the sides. I don't care if it had a thousand horsepower and the handling of an Ariel Atom, it'd still be seriously uncool.

Against my better judgement, went with cool.

Faux-wood is atrocious, but the general look of the car has a bit of a retro vibe that I like. I mean, it's not one of the god-awful 80s ones, and it's not a blobby "wood"-trimmed 90s monstrosity like a Buick Roadmaster wagon either.

Also, given the discussions in the other thread about road trip cars, I reckon this'd be an excellent road trip choice. If I went to any of my friends and said, "would you like to drive across the U.S. in this?", they'd all say "hell yes", which also makes it cool.

So yeah. Cool. But only just.

Sub Zero. A car from back when wagons were cool.

I'm gonna go with cool. It's just so lovably silly that it's at least cool.

Murcie_LP640

I'm sure that would have been well and dandy in the 60s. This is 2013.

An actual minivan T&C with a V6 can beat the 440c.i. V8.

Seriously Uncool.

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I'd be willing to bet a 6 cylinder Maverick with a 4.56 rear end would beat modern minivans.

The only thing this has going for it (beyond having a big engine and a lot of space, and that's better for 'usefulness' than 'cool') is nostalgia; it doesn't even look good. I'm not a fan of wagons in general, but most of them would just get a 'meh' from me. Not this one. This wagon's looks represent just about everything uncool there ever was or ever will be about a wagon.

Seriously Uncool.

Cool because it's a wagon, not cool because it's a wagon, cool because it's an older wagon, not cool because it's not a newer wagon...what is it about this bodystyle that scatters opinions everywhere?

Personally, I don't understand why anyone would look past the Miata's hairdresser/gay man stereotype, or Honda's ricer kid stigma, or BMW's asshole businessman image, or the Camaro's "white trash" redneck association, or any other cliché regarding the driver rather than the machine itself...and then turn around and slap any wagon with the mommymobile/Griswold schtick. But hey, this isn't an objective contest.

Wagon or not, this isn't my type of car -- too big, too blunt of an engine -- but I still voted Cool because of its nifty oldschool styling, RWD, unquestionable utility, and its ability to stir people up, for better or worse.

Wolfe

Personally, I don't understand why anyone would look past the Miata's hairdresser/gay man stereotype, or Honda's ricer kid stigma, or BMW's asshole businessman image, or the Camaro's "white trash" redneck association, or any other cliché regarding the driver rather than the machine itself...and then turn around and slap any wagon with the mommymobile/Griswold schtick. But hey, this isn't an objective contest.

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We are judging the coolness and the people who drive the cars contribute to whether it's cool or not. As an example the Camaro could be the best car in the world but if it's only driven by the white trash class, it's not cool.

Joey D

We are judging the coolness and the people who drive the cars contribute to whether it's cool or not. As an example the Camaro could be the best car in the world but if it's only driven by the white trash class, it's not cool.

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While I'd normally agree with that line of thinking (though I'd tend to disagree on Miatas, both for obvious reasons and for the fact that the sort of people who call them "gay" cars are such douchebags that the Miata is cool by default), I'm not sure it applies as much with this Chrysler.

While wagons were indeed the minivans of their day, this one is now old enough that it should have shaken off that stigma more than say, an 80s or 90s wagon. I think the goalposts change a little when something was a classic.

Actually, I suppose a good analogy would actually be Miatas again. Back in the early 90s they may well have been hairdressers' cars, but given quarter of a century of existence an NA Miata tends now to be bought by enthusiasts. Just like a 60s Town & Country is no longer bought by soccer moms or Chevy Chase* since they've all moved on to minivans.

Just my $0.02, anyway


*Yes, I know the National Lampoon car was actually a Ford. Same type of thing though...