Blonde Jokes

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Sephiroth_52

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Q: Why does a blonde wear panties?
A: To keep her ankles warm.

Q: What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg?
A: Nothing. They've never met.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde likes you?
A: She has sex with you two nights in a row.

Q: What does a blonde have in common with a turtle?
A: When they both fall on thier backs, they're screwed.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and Atlantic City?
A: Atlantic City doesn't have as many crabs.

Q: How is a blonde like a Hoover vacuum?
A: She sucks, she blow and she gets laid in the closet.

Q: What is a blonde's favorite nursury rhyme?
A: "Hump Me, Dump Me"

Q: How does a blonde practice safe sex?
A: She puts on rubber based lipstick.

Q: What did the blonde's mother say to her before she went out on a date?
A: "If you're not in bed by 12, come home."

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One. Blondes will screw anything.

Q: What do you call three blondes standing side-by-side?
A: A wind tunnel.

Q: What do you call a brunette standing between two blondes?
A: An Interpereter.

Q: What can you tell about a blonde with a bruised belly-button?
A: Her boyfriend is a blonde too.
 
Thanks for the welcome. :D

You guys like those? Here's some even better ones:

Q: What do you call a blonde with braces?
A: Black & Decker Pecker Wrecker.

Q: What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A: A blow job with handlebars.

Q: How is a blonde like railroad tracks?
A: She lays across the whole town.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde's been using your computer?
A: There's White Out on the screen.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde's been in your refrigirator?
A: There's lipstick on your cucumbers.

Q: How do you give a blonde more headroom?
A: Adjust the steering wheel.

Q: Why do blondes wear big hoop earrings when they go on a date?
A: So they have some place to put their feet.

Q: Why did the blonde take a ladder into the bar?
A: She heard the drinks were on the house.

Q: What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?
A: An air mattress.

Q: What do you call a blonde who has dyed her hair brown?
A: Artificial intelligence.

Q: How do you know a blonde's having a bad day?
A: Her tampon's behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Q: How can you tell when a blonde has been baking chocolate chip cookies?
A: There's M&M shells all over the floor.

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England?
A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock.

Q:What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
A: Maybe someday we'll find Bigfoot.

Q: How does a blonde turn the light on after having sex.
A: She kicks the car door open.

Q: What is a blonde's mating call?
A: ''NEXT!''

Q: What is every blonde's ambition?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Q: What's the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp?
A: They both get screwed on the front of a Ford Escort!

Q: Q: What's worse than a redhead and a brunette trying to build a house underwater?
A: A blonde trying to set fire to it.

Q: What do blondes and shrimps have in common?
A: Their heads are full of crap, but the pink bits are nice.

Q: What do a blonde and a taxi have in common?
A: Everyone's been in and out for $2.00.

Q: What do you call a blonde bird?
A: A swallow!

Q: What did the blonde do after she brushed her hair?
A: Pulled up her pants.

Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?
A: Her headlights weren't working, so she was flashing people.

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted.

Q: What does a blonde do when she wakes up?
A: She goes home.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a shower?
A: You don't have to turn a blonde on to get her wet.

Q: What do a blonde and a barn have in common?
A: They always have a coc.k in them.

Q: What do a blonde and an instant lottery ticket have in common?
A: All you have to do is scratch the box to win.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde was trying to drive stick?
A: There's a condom on the gear shift.

Q: What do you call a blonde doing a handstand?
A: A brunette with bad breath.

Q: How do you get a blonde lesbian to climb the wall?
A: Show her the crack in the ceiling.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A: You can fit three fingers in a bowling ball.
 

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