Chav Eggs

  • Thread starter Thread starter DQuaN
  • 8 comments
  • 602 views
DQuaN

DQuaN

Goat of the Year
Premium
Messages
12,299
United Kingdom
Ealing-London
Two chavs riding along the A12 on a scooter. They break down and start
hitching a lift.

A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the chavs ask him for a lift
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20,000 bowling
balls but will take a look at the scooter for them.

He tries everything he knows but is unable to repair it. Time is getting on
now and he's late for his delivery so he tells the chavs he has to leave.
"Gizza lift," they say "Innit?".

The trucker once again explains that he has no room as he is carrying
20,000 bowling balls. The chavs put it to the driver that if they can manage to fit in the back will he take them and he agrees.

They manage to squeeze themselves and their scooter into the back of the
wagon so the driver shuts the doors and gets off on his way. By this time he is really late and so
puts his foot down.

Sure enough PC Plod pulls him up for speeding. The good officer asks the
driver what he is carrying to which he replies "20,000 Chav Eggs". The policeman obviously
doesn't believe this so wants to take a look.

He opens the back door and quickly shuts it and locks it. He gets onto his
radio and calls for immediate backup from as many officers as possible.

The dispatcher asks what emergency he has that requires so many officers.
"I've got a wagon with 20,000 Chav Eggs in it - 2 have hatched and the bastards have managed to nick a scooter already".
 
You don't want to know.

Okay, maybe you do (language warning).

Chav's Charter (from above site):
1. Drop litter - you don't want rubbish in your pockets do you?
2. Replace an adequate and legal exhaust on your car with an inappropriate one and breach the peace with stressful noise polution.
3. Know the price of everything and the value of nothing.
4. Adore brand names and suffocate all opprtunity for real quality to speak for itself.
5. Drag everyone else down at school or work by constantly challenging in a negative way accepted practices.
6. Don't treat McDonalds as an occasional treat or convenience, treat it as a way of life until you become morbidly obese.
7. Watch television rather than living a real life but aspire to showcasing your dysfunction on a chat show.
8. Smoke cigarettes
9. Erode the language with which you were educated to the point that you can no longer remember how to speak properly... After all the best way to articulate yourself is with a gun.
10. Definitly don't develop a spiritual side,death probably doesn't apply to you
- you're there already.
 
Loudmusic: Spot on! 👍

DQuaN: lol ooo i needed that after today. I think I'm the only sad englishman to find that funny. :grumpy:
 
I don't want to poop on the parade here, but I first heard this joke fifteen years ago, and it was really racist. You see, the word "Chav" was substituted for a particular "N" word, which is really offensive.

But, yeah, carry on...
 
I really don't get this. I understand what it means but.... I guess it is hard to get any joke after needing to have it thoroughly explained to you.
 
Anderton
I don't want to poop on the parade here, but I first heard this joke fifteen years ago, and it was really racist. You see, the word "Chav" was substituted for a particular "N" word, which is really offensive.

But, yeah, carry on...
Click to expand...

Chavs are white in the UK. They are also know as Garys, pikies etc but are in every case considered scum, very annoying, wear sports brands (Reebok Classics), big gold chains, ear rings, drink White Lightning and are generally hated by everyone except other chavs.
 

Latest Posts

Back