How "Jason Bourne" could you be right now?

[Stevisiov]

Well, I am currently in a very small and narrow student accommodation room, the is one door and on the opposite side of the room a window, just big enough to fit through. My computer faces this window.

If an assassin entered the door behind me, I would have my back to him, however that means between me and him as a large - highbacked leather chair on wheels, which is sufficiently heavy enough to impede the attack temporarily. First i would stand, turn and kick the chair in his direction, its on wheels so it shouldn't be too hard to get it traveling fairly briskly in his direction. Due to the fact that the room is very narrow, there is little chance that an attacker could avoid it given I act quickly enough.

This is primarily a delay tactic in order to buy myself some time. This gives me the time necessary to reach into my middle left draw and pull out a long sharp kitchen knife and hopefully allow me time to jump onto my computer desk (sturdy wood). By this time, my attack should have gotten past the temporary big chair blockade, since he will have reach a point in the room where it widens. He has an option of going straight or left onto single bed. While the shortest route is straight, I am a position on my computer desk to swipe all the heavy contents of my high shelves, and rain them into the centre of the room. While these probably won't incapacitate the attacker as he advances, it will leave him extremely vulnerable as he shields himself from falling plates, pans, gearboxes, free-weights, books and the likes. I would have time to jump down and attack in the one move and the staggered enemy would struggle to defend themselves if I acted quick enough.

If the attacker chose to go left, I would be in a much trickier position as I have less items at my disposal to even the odds. I am assuming that in a straight fight with a trained assassin I would almost undoubtedly loose, and with less things in my favour, I need to think about escaping. Since he is only about 5ft away from me, a risky knife lunge from me would easily be spotted, blocked and countered. All I need is a diversionary tactic to allow me to jump out the window which is right next to me and out of reach for the attacker. While I could unlatch the window in seconds without leaving myself open to attack, I most likely wouldn't have enough time to jump through it.

Since the attacker will be seconds away from an attack I need to act fast to buy myself an extra little bit of time. There is a heavy ceramic plate on the window ledge next to my right hand, I could easily deploy a frisbee style sling in his direction before he reaches me with a lunging knife attack, if I missed, I would be in even more vulnerable position and probably be killed in a matter of seconds. If I hit the mark (he will have very little time to dodge at this distance, it could win me that extra second or so time to get out the window. If I hit him in the facial area, then it could potentially render the attacker unconscious or at least stagger them for a few seconds, giving me time to attack.

Assuming I just hit the target (but no critical blow) and have escaped through the window, my odds of survival have significantly increased. I am a very quick runner, I know the campus grounds well and there are people around, some of whom may help me, although they probably wouldn't exactly stand in-between me and the attacker. If I run towards reception, I may be able to slip into crowds of people, and I may be able to rely on security to help me. If not I have to re-enter block and hope I can loose the attacker in the network of corridors that I should know better than them.

That would my best way to survive and attack, although the odds of everything going to plan and me acting decisively enough are slim at best.

I would like to think watching the bourne trilogy the other night may have helped me a little bit.

 

[TheCracker]

Location: I'm sat at my desk in the corner of the office facing into the room. Any assailant would have to had entered the room from the only non-fire escape door which is 10m away and in clear view. There are several obstacles between him and me.

Fight option: Within easy reach are a couple of size 3 scalpels, a pair of scissors, a biro, a 12" metal ruler, a can of spray mount, a bottle of tip-ex and a fluorescent marker pen. The connector on the receiver to my phone has a snapped off retaining clip and is only held in place by some tape.

My first move would be to kick large chair-on-castors next to me towards the assailant, slowing him/her down and giving me enough time grab the phone receiver and throw it at their head. I'd then use it's cord (held in my other hand) to attempt a strangle. I'd probably then reach for the scalpels and attempt to do what damage i could with them before the tiny (but hellishly sharp) blades break. I'd finish them off with a face full of spray mount, probably leaving the tip-ex and fluorescent marker out of it.

Flight option: With the narrow passage to the main door blocked by the assailant, my only options are a desk-top to desk-top hop across to the other side of the office (15-20m) and out of the fire-door, down the fire escape where my car awaits close by. Or attempt to break the large glass window behind me (doesn't open wide enough to get out of) with my heavy 21" CRT monitor. The roof of the delivery van parked about 12 foot below my window will have to break my fall.

 

[Driving Park]

Where I am now (in a spare bedroom that serves as the computer room and my euphonium/bass trombone practice room), I'm pretty vulnerable seeing as I'm next to an open door.

I'd probably take my euph case (next to the door, with the euph in it; weighs about 18-20 pounds) and use that as a shield against whatever physical weapon the assailant had (let's assume it's a knife of some sort). Then while occupying him with that, I'd reach back and grab my music stand, which isn't to heavy but would work well used like a shovel. After hitting him in the head/body enough that he's fallen backwards onto the ground, I'd take the euph case and use it as a club to his head. While he was on the ground I'd quickly get the euph out of the case and use it similarly as a club - it works better than the case since it's not padded at all ). ...Repeat as necessary?

My only escape options would be to a) push the assailant into the bathroom directly across from the door using the euph case and then exit left to the staircase, or attempt to jump out of the window (which is braced). That would take some time though, which is something I wouldn't have a lot of.

 

[Danoff]

I could be very Jason Bourne right now. There's a pen on my desk. That's about it though. Not much going on in my office at work that I could use as a weapon. I think the pen would be the best option aside from throwing chairs, monitors, books, etc. Probably stick with the pen. It worked in the movies.

Flight sucks too. If I could distract my assailant for just a moment (by knocking him down, stabbing him with a pen, etc.) I'd pick up my phone, dial 911 (which goes to local security, and there's lots of them). As soon as I hit the last "1", I'd be climbing on my desk to go over the cube wall. From there as long as I could outrun my attacker I could make it to the stairs and get out. There are multiple floors to exit the building, and he'd probably guess I'd leave on the first floor. I'd take the stairs down a few floors and take the freight elevator to exit the building on the 2nd floor. I think that'd give me the best chance of getting out.