I Feel I'm Gonna Really Hurt Someone Soon!! Help !!

  • Thread starter Thread starter Silent7Sniper7
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Silent7Sniper7

Silent7Sniper7

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Silent7Sniper7
I'm desperate for advice before I really hurt someone. I've been having trouble with my girlfriend and I'm actually losing control of my anger.

For about 10 years I've suppressed my anger instead of letting it out and now I can't. I've got extremely angry before and nearly put someone in hospital.

I don't want to talk to my parents because they won't understand, they broke up when I was 5 which ruined my relationship with them all.
 
Umm...go for a walk. Or a drive. Not really sure there's much anyone can do for you on the internet.
 
Dude, do this: Rage in BF3 on a mic then record all of it, post it on Youtube, and enjoy all the fans you get. Seriously. Just play some game and get all your rage out. Whenever your girl friend ticks you off just say "stupid b*tch" behind her back or give the finger as soon as she faces away. I do stuff like that all the time and it really calms me down, often making me laugh.
 
terminator363
Dude, do this: Rage in BF3 on a mic then record all of it, post it on Youtube, and enjoy all the fans you get. Seriously. Just play some game and get all your rage out. Whenever your girl friend ticks you off just say "stupid b*tch" behind her back or give the finger as soon as she faces away. I do stuff like that all the time and it really calms me down, often making me laugh.
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Lol might have to try the raging one.
 
Silent7Sniper7
I must admit it does feel good to actually say how I feel for once instead of staying quiet.
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Everyone does. But the internet isn't really a good place to discuss this stuff. You can try with your close friends?
 
You ever try painting, like, pictures? I'm serious, actually. Maybe not even pictures, just, put stuff on canvas, cardboard, paper. Sometimes it's just lines, marks, whatever just feels right. Put on some loud music and go at it, take deep breaths and let it exit you through that. Idk, I know that feels good for me.
 
Simple. take your pillow. Then pull out a fist, and beat it continuously until tired. Wait then do it again... And again, and again... ... ...
 
@ Skython & HACKr

I guess those are some good ways to suppress his anger quickly, but I don't think it'll disappear just by doing that countless times, unless he wants to relinquish this demeanor.
 
Get some younger siblings, oh wait.
Sorry. :guilty:

I actually think the BF3 idea was the best.
 
Find a substitute. Get a punching bag (or something physical) and work it out whenever you need to. Keep talking about it, too. Not just to anyone but to friends or loved ones you can trust who can be neutral sounding boards. Sometimes talking about it is all you need to do. Just don't let it rule you. The worst you can do is keep burying things. That will lead to someone getting hurt.

The painting idea is a great one too. Doesn't matter if you're an artist or not, just releasing your emotion through another medium can be a powerful thing. I'd also suggest trying to write. Doesn't even have to be about anything at first - stream of consciousness. You could keep a private journal, etc.

Although playing BF3 might be a quick release, ultimately it sounds like you have some complicated feelings that need to be looked at and sorted out. No one else can do that but you. So give yourself more space, time, and permission to have some safe time alone and figure it out.
 
Technicolors
@ Skython & HACKr

I guess those are some good ways to suppress his anger quickly, but I don't think it'll disappear just by doing that countless times, unless he wants to relinquish this demeanor.
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Age: 13.

You are lacking in some experience in these matters. Just sayin'

As for handling anger, I try to address why I am angry to begin with. Most often, it is over things that truly do not matter. I'm not trying to trivialize it; this is coming from a guy that use to break things regularly over anger. I'm just saying I've found it is often you choose to let things get to you.

If you do need to let some steam off, video games or other hobbies are a great outlet for emotional frustration and tension. Also, evaluate the people in your life and how they are impacting your mood and feelings. Sometimes cutting some people out is better for your health than not.

If I may ask, what is your age? That can play a bit into it as well.
 
Join a local martial arts class, they will soon teach you how to control your anger, and provide the right environment to let your anger out.
 
Azuremen
Age: 13.

You are lacking in some experience in these matters. Just sayin'

As for handling anger, I try to address why I am angry to begin with. Most often, it is over things that truly do not matter. I'm not trying to trivialize it; this is coming from a guy that use to break things regularly over anger. I'm just saying I've found it is often you choose to let things get to you.

If you do need to let some steam off, video games or other hobbies are a great outlet for emotional frustration and tension. Also, evaluate the people in your life and how they are impacting your mood and feelings. Sometimes cutting some people out is better for your health than not.

If I may ask, what is your age? That can play a bit into it as well.
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I never thought about that. I've had a few cases where I've simply cut people away and it comes with benifits. But if done to the wrong people it really isn't very pleasant. Though people like family members are hard to cut out. :grumpy:
 
Silent7Sniper7
I don't want to talk to my parents because they won't understand, they broke up when I was 5 which ruined my relationship with them all.
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Aaron, is that you? :odd:

Anyways.....things I do to help with rage: Lap the 'Ring. Take medication. Count to ten. Fight with someone who understands and will take a few digs but give back, with or without boxing gloves.

I recently had the same anger purge you describe. I have them often. I got drunk with my dad and we went at it bare knuckle on the street for ten minutes and once we were thoroughly exhausted and battered we shook hands and had another beer together. My dad understands that I need to do this to avoid me hurting anyone else, plus he's a large man and can take a few punches.

TankAss95
Actually cats are said to have 9, I think.
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Not Jai's, clearly.

Jai
Do you have any animals? Because cats have seven lives..
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Completely irrelevant to the thread, Jai, as usual. :rolleyes:

I like cats and they do help with stress but I doubt a comment like is helpful.



So, in conclusion, join a gym and get a sparring partner or thrash out some rage on the PS3/ XBox.
 
Get a punching bag.

Vent on that.

I also have anger issues but I tend to punch drywalls in or punch glass doors.

And I am not joking about the glass door part.
 
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and suggest that replacing one form of anger-filled violence with one less destructive is not a solution to the problem. It's essentially a repeat of the undesired reaction.

Violence that stems from anger is purely the result of a loss of perspective. Things like this are evidence that you don't desire to repeat the result of being violent, so you must choose an alternative. If you want to change, you will. And as much as I don't wish to offend you, acting violently toward someone is who has angered you is always unnecessary, and stems from one's ego. "This person has angered me, and so I'm going to do something about it...". But you don't have to, that is a choice you are making.
 
Learn self control, if you already have plenty of it, practice some more.

Acquire a good vocabulary, lots of reading (maybe some lengthy RPGs with lots of text if you're into that sort of thing.) Use all that you know and speak your mind when you should. Make sure that what you want to get across to someone is made clear. No more, no less.

When yo keep quiet, it does nothing. When you at least say what you want to say, you always have less anger and less regret. Just try to keep the things you're saying from a simple "**** you!" :)

If you're a Christian, then pray for peace. I do, and it helps a great deal. If not, that's up to you.

Also, I like to listen to music to calm myself and dissipate the anger. Don't listen to music that will only add too your wrath. Ambient, certain trance/techno, harp, piano, etc... there's lots of soothing stuff out there.

Going for a walk in a natural and secluded area is good too. If you live in a city, a park might work, but it's best to avoid other people when trying to relax yourself.

It's okay to be angry, just don't act in anger. More often then not, you'll do something rash that you'll only regret when the emotion goes away.
 
Hit the weights (no pun intended). I have days where I want to put my fist through someone's face, instead I work out. IT HELPS!
 

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