I very unhappy in life at the moment

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Heath_1

Heath_1

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GlazeVZ
I've been a member for close to 2 years. I use my computer and internet alot as I have no friends or a job. I am trying my very best to find a job, but I am very unhappy with the way my life is at the moment. I really want 2010 to be a good year for me, I know we're only just over a week into the fresh year and many days, weeks, months to go yet. But I feel very down, very depressed. I don't know what to do. Can someone please offer some advice for me?

I am 20 years old. Reason I've never had a job yet before is because I did not finish school. I dropped out when I was only 15 years old, then my father fell ill with cancer and I had to take care of him for a few years witch meant I could not find work. Mostly the reason I am feeling so down is because I cannot seem to find a job. I don't expect anything just needed to vent a bit, maybe someone can offer me some advice. You don't have to read this if you don't like but anyone else has similar problems maybe you can share, it might lift spirits and feelings a bit.

Thanks.


Heath.
 
Hi Heath

Im sorry life is tough on you right now. I know what your going through because in the past 3 years ive lost my wife, and recently my father. All that and im still in my 30s.

I dont know where your from, but i think maybe a part time job, eventually leading onto a full time one would be a good thing for you. Im sure there has to be something somewhere in your area that you could do?.

If not then have you though about volunterring and helping out others less fortunate? Like at a shelter or childrens hospital etc etc?. Its suprising how doing something as simple as that can change a person.

Just a few thoughts..................btw the moral of this post is, always remember that there is always someone else worse off than yourself. Its helped me out no end. 👍

AngloAmerican
 
wow. Sorry to hear about that dude. I thought of volunteering but on the other hand I really need money as I'm getting no income and savings running low. I'm sure once I've got a job things will certainly pick up.
 
Hey man, cheer up eh? I only have 1 real friend (and a close cousin as well, but yeah), generally speaking I'm quite unliked myself. You really have to count your blessings, because focusing on the bad things in life will only make you depressed, and nobody's life is perfect so it goes for everyone.
Starting with any job you can get might be a good idea, even if it's as a casual at a supermarket. You might then be able to get your highschool certificate from a college in your spare time (can that be done?).
Either way, we're pretty good company here, well, most of us :sly:, and GT5 will be pretty awesome when it hits.:)
 
Heath_1
wow. Sorry to hear about that dude. I thought of volunteering but on the other hand I really need money as I'm getting no income and savings running low. I'm sure once I've got a job things will certainly pick up.
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Things do usually pick up. Sometimes it just takes a while is all. Try not to get to down on life in the meantime, because something always turns up when you least expect it. 👍

And hey it could be worse............you could be Tiger Woods. What a :dunce:

AngloAmerican
 
Don't worry too much about friends, many of them stab you in the back at some point in life anyway. Sorry to hear about your difficult position, I'm 20 years old as well. I have to admit though, many of those who went to high school with me last year have either dropped out or they just didn't care. They now work in stores while I'm studying for an incredibly well paid job. If I were you I'd be looking at a solid education. No matter how many jobs you may find, a completed education expands your horizon so much more and the options you get in life will get so enormous you at some point will find yourself with more than you ever wished for.

Whatever you choose, job or education, I wish you all the best and don't stress too much about the whole friends stuff.
 
If you could provide some more information on what steps you've taken to get a job we may be able to offer some alternative routes to go down.

First thing is to make sure CV is up to date and well presented. Even if you don't have qualifications you can still present your strenghts on your CV. If you have never written a CV before or have never been given advice I'll be more than happy to take a look at if for you and advise you on what to change.

Make sure you register with as many recruitment companies as you can. Having no qualifications may seem like your going to be held back for life but there are many jobs that will offer in house training and may even offer you an apprenticeship. Training and experience are your best friends, that's what employers will look for when you're older.

As long as you stay determined something will come along, but it's going to require hard work. Also make sure that your well presented for every interview you go to and that you shake every interviewers hand.

Turn every setback into a major comeback.
 
It can always be worse, you have a computer, and I assume you have somewhere to live and food to eat. There are people worse off then you.

Now instead of spending hours on the computer on a Gran Turismo message board, go back to school. Here in the states if you never completed school you go for a GED, I'm not sure what it's called in Australia. If that's not possible look at learning a trade of some kind, if you like the computer try web design or IT work. A lot of that can be self taught and then just start doing odd jobs for people.

Life is what you make of it and if you give up on it then you are never really going to get anywhere. I've been there and I'm sure many others have too. Pick a goal and work as hard as you can to get to it.
 
I think it's obvious you don't want to finish your education. So, go learn a skill. Without one, you'll never earn a decent wage.

If you can't do that, for some reason, work for a big company for any menial job they have, but tell them you want to advance to a different position.

Now for personal interviews, you must be happy and eager to work. If you go in quiet, lethargic and reserved (i.e. depressed), you're not getting hired. Put on your best clothes and style yourself like you were going to church on Christmas or Easter. Be personable and funny.

I myself found it difficult to find a job when I was in college. I didn't have a problem with finding jobs when I was younger, but was having trouble then. I found out I was going to interviews hung over and exhausted and they wouldn't hire me. Soon, I caught on and soon changed my disposition. I started acting charming and funny. Basically, I started acting like I was trying to pick up a chic at a party, or something. I got the job with no problems, after that. If you're going in to interviews depressed and desperate, they wont probably hire you. Depressed people make lousy employees.
 
Solid, What kind of bourbon is that in your avatar?

Heath,
I'm sorry that this "horse" called life has run off with you, and bucked you off in a bad place.


By reading the thread it 'seems' you want to take the "hard way" to success. To some that will speak to your ability to do even when you are ill-equipped to do.
I'll advise getting a GED, or go back and finish school. It will be the longer course of action, and it will be hard, but easier in the long run.
Or, as has been advised, learn a trade. Also hard, but easier in the long run.
Yeah, your life has had a high suck factor.
But the way you handle the here and now is what will define your character to a potential employer.
Good Luck.
 
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Bram Turismo
They now work in stores while I'm studying for an incredibly well paid job. If I were you I'd be looking at a solid education. No matter how many jobs you may find, a completed education expands your horizon so much more and the options you get in life will get so enormous you at some point will find yourself with more than you ever wished for.
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Typical Norwegian white collar student speaking. Education is not the end all be all factor. It's not about earning money, if that's why you're studying you're doing it for the wrong reason. It's about being happy with a stable income, you can also get that working in a trade. There's too much talk about status and being successful, people are afraid of doing the dirty work but forget that someone's actually gotta do that too.

OP, don't forget that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger :)
Part time work can't be that hard to find while you're figuring out something?
 
Good advice here so far :) Most important is to look at and appreciate your blessings. Life has a way of surprising you, when you least expect it. Don't be discouraged.

I came from a very poor family and although I finished High School, had no opportunity to go to college. As an aimless 18 year old, I joined the Army, served in Viet Nam and came back with Government assistance to pay for college. I didn't start college until I was 24, graduated at 28 and literally fell into the job of my dreams. It wasn't about money, but about being creative and fulfilling passions.

I guess my point here is that you have to be pro-active and do something. Even if it's just a little thing that you can do today. Focus on 1 day at a time and do whatever you can do on that day. Don't get hung up on the long term future, it will take care of itself one day at a time. You are still young and have lots of opportunity even if it doesn't seem that way now. Being cheerful is the first step in getting "in the door", as others have said :)
 
Could someone please explain what a GED is. We don't have it here - we probably have something equivalent but without knowing what it is it's a bit hard.

Heath if you a truly depressed then you should see a doctor. He can help and if this is the case you may need to fix this before moving on. If you are just feeling down then you need to get out of the house and involved in activities you enjoy particularly ones that involve other people.

As far as getting a job goes, have you registered with Centrelink and JobNetwork. Also register with an employement agency like Maxima. Woollies/Kmart/Target and loads of other retailers take online applications.
Ask around at your local shopping centre. Drop resumes off - do this every 6-12 weeks because they generally only hang on to them for up to 3 months and sometimes it's just about being in the right place at the right time. Hey and there's a new Vietnamese restaurant opened at the Hallett Cove Mall that is looking for staff (just in case you live near there).

Education isn't the be all and end all of getting a job, not every job requires formal qualifications. But if you have a career in mind that requires it then you gotta get back to school.

There are quite a few schools that take 'mature age' student to finish SACE(year 12 certificate for the non-australians/south australians). Not sure where in SA you are but one I know of is Hamilton Secondary College. If school study has never been a strong point then you don't have to complete it in one year.
Now is the time to be looking at TAFE courses, there are loads out there, you can get the handbook from your local newsagent or look online. Even if you do a course for something that interests you hobby wise at least it is getting you out of the house and mixing with people.

If you really think University is where you want to be don't let not finishing year 12 stop you. Flinders University runs a Foundation Course for mature age students It's pretty much a half year course that runs a couple of nights a week. When I did it (1999 at age 36 with only year 10 under my belt) the first part of the course was basic maths and statistics, essay writing and other skills that will be used to help through various fields of study. The second half was actually picking some topics to study. There was a range to choose from from all fields of study apart from medicine. Something to give you a taste for what you might like to study in at uni. At the end of the course they offer places to approx half the number of students enrolled but usually by the end of the course only half the number enrolled are still there so pretty much if you stick it out you can get a place.

There is also Army Reserves as well as Army, Navy and Airforce.
 
A GED is a high-school equivalence exam, it basically proves that you have the knowledge that is required from a high school graduate. Most people who drop out of high-school go back to get it eventually as it is kind of hard to move on to the next step without at least a high school diploma.
 
Max Powers
A GED is a high-school equivalence exam, it basically proves that you have the knowledge that is required from a high school graduate. Most people who drop out of high-school go back to get it eventually as it is kind of hard to move on to the next step without at least a high school diploma.
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Thanks. :)
There are various names for it even in Australia depending on what state you live in. SACE - in SA, VCE in Victoria, HSC in NSW. No idea what the other states call it.
 
Heath, I know how you feel and sometimes you feel like you've 'missed the boat' when it comes to good job opportunities and a social life. Not so. I'll explain why and this is a bit of my dirty laundry but I don't care, it's been so long ago it's a different time and I'm a different person since then. 👍

I was in the EXACT same boat at age 22. Former addict (I won't divulge what), disqualified from driving, no job, no women, no 'real' friends (because my mates from high school were and became addicts), only an HSC for education and only the computer to live with. I wasn't even allowed full centrelink because my mum earned too much at the time, I was only allowed $14 on Youth Allowance!! :eek: So my life was a dead end at that point.

I loved being around cars when I was a teenager so one of my first places to join and be a member of was a car forum, called the Fast Fours forum (after the car magazine). I joined there in June 2001, and straightaway got to talking with like headed people who enjoyed cars. Within 6 weeks which was late July, we actually went and organised a meeting between eachother for a cruise. Through that car club, I met a guy who was a manager at Coles who offered three of us job opportunities at that store. 2 of us turned up and started working there and within 3mths, became permanent staff there because we were enthusiastic about working there.

I then met my ex through the car forum as she joined up. We only hooked up for a couple of months but you can see where this is going, within 3mths I had gone from being a no-hoper bum with no prospects to someone who suddenly:
a) Had a full-time job
b) Gained a social life
c) Had a girlfriend

From there I was put in the magazine (one of only a few people ever to get in WITHOUT a car!) and became a freelance writer for them, reporting on all the drag racing events that were happening at Eastern Creek at the time aswell as all the car shows in Sydney. I broke up with the ex and then met my wife and had to make a choice of career vs passion because between Coles and Fast Fours, I was working 7 days a week and on Wednesdays I was spending 15hrs each day between the two jobs! I chose career and went on to become a manager at Coles myself within 2yrs of working there.

After I left Coles I went and studied various courses that are put through Job Network (now known as Job Services Australia, JSA for short), and each time I was studying, a new job would pop up as I kept wanting to work. Being keen is what gets you the job more often than not and being honest to a degree too. I explained in future job interviews how I hung with the wrong crowd as a youngster and didn't know what I was doing at that time during the late-90's and that's why my resume wasn't as thorough as some other people. :)

So don't worry, look for what you like to do and follow that....as it will provide avenues you might not expect to be there. 👍

I will say this, one question you will get in your job interview and most places do this now is, "why are you better than the next guy they interview?" and explain to them what your good qualities are and then give them something that they don't normally expect, like saying "you'll be the breath of fresh air to the place that no one else could be" or something like that.
 
Heath, I haven't read the whole thread so sorry if this is covered already or not, but you seem to be identifying a lack of having a job as a key factor in not being happy. If it's simply a case of you can't get beyond the interviews then I would reccomend doing some volunteer work while you are looking. Going into an interview and saying "I am currenty doing this work" counts as experience. You don't have to highlight it as volunteer work if you don't want to, but either way it gives you experience and experience helps you get a job.

As for your social problems, withuot knowing you I can't really comment, but when your working with people every day you do start to get to know them and I've made a lot of friends with people I've worked with over the years, I even dated one for a year. Socially, I would just suggest talk to people, I can be hard to know what to say a lot of the time, but more often than not saying something is better than saying nothing even if it isn't a deep and insightfull comment or question.

I'm sorry to hear about your dad, cancer s a terrible thing and I have first hand experience of seeing the effects it can have on people you care about. If you don't mind talking about it, what is the situation with your dad, is it treatable?
 
eiriksmil
Typical Norwegian white collar student speaking. Education is not the end all be all factor. It's not about earning money, if that's why you're studying you're doing it for the wrong reason. It's about being happy with a stable income, you can also get that working in a trade.
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It's a lot easier to get a stable income you're happy with if you're studying to go into a well paid area though. You can't dismiss all people like that just because of one opinion you've formed which unfairly labels people!
 
Thanks guys really helped me here. Read all of your posts. I am regiestred with a job agencey thing at the moment. They made me a resume. Everyday I apply for jobs online or hand out a few resumes. I will try harder though.

Lots of people on here are friendly. The jobs Ive been applying for is mostly supermarkets, shops stuff like that.

@mafia_boy. thats very inspiring story, That is really cool how you got that happening. I hope I can get going like that too. Amazing.


Thanks guys :)
 
Military. I met some troops from Australia in the desert. awsome guys for sure

heres some stuff i dug up on there web site under FAQ
-What happens if I only completed Year 9?
You may be eligible to apply for the Army, and a Defence Recruiter will be able to let you know what courses you will be able to do to reach the required standard for the Navy and Air Force.

-Can I do my Years 11 or 12 in the military?
Yes, the Navy, Army and Air Force promote the educational advancement of all personnel regardless of avenue of entry. Defence has a number of educational assistance schemes that provide sponsorship (at varying rates) for academic and personal development courses.

And if you get spun up on all your school Theyll pay for you to keep going

-What courses do you offer?
If you have the appropriate level of Year 12 education, you can undertake part-time university studies at the Australian Defence Force Academy (ADFA) and not incur any Student Contribution Charges. Degrees on offer range from Bachelor of Arts, to Bachelor of Science, or Engineering. You may also undertake sponsored study at another university and be reimbursed up to 70% of the costs under the Defence Assisted Study Scheme. Other specialist schemes are also available which may cover 100% of the costs.
 
Heath_1
@mafia_boy. thats very inspiring story, That is really cool how you got that happening. I hope I can get going like that too. Amazing.
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You can dude, just follow two rules, and I've followed these rules for a while now because for me personally, they work.

1. Don't let other people's opinions get in the way of what YOU want to do. They aren't you, and they aren't living your life so they just need to get over it, regardless of what you do. So long as it's not hurting you, screw what they think.

2. Appreciate yourself for who YOU are. 🤬 the status, 🤬 the peers, 🤬 all the haters that want to put you down and bring you down if your life appears better than theirs, if you feel that you are doing right by yourself, then that's all that really matters and 🤬 what the others say about it.

That's basically it....if you show that you appreciate yourself and think for yourself, others will appreciate you for being a level headed bloke that isn't being narcissistic.
 
No real advice Heath but be strong and focus on the good things in your life.
 
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