- 10,832
This is a long post about personal change, just to warn you.
Some of you may remember a few months back (or longer) where there was more than one thread either here or in the Opinions Forum regarding the pros and cons of marijuana. The discussions got a little heated at moments and I was in the thick of it, on the pro side. I knew at that time that I wasn't going to be a pothead until my deathbed, but had no way to comprehend or predict what the not-too-distant-future held. Things have changed a lot since then and I thought I'd confess, among other places and to other people, here.
I smoked pretty much every day for ten years, but don't any more. The last time I smoked was a couple days before my son was born. I knew the days of getting high were numbered, but only for a while, or so I thought at the time. I think I can remember thinking to myself that I'd buy a bag again, maybe in a few months, when he sleeps long enough for me to do it.
Well he's been sleeping long enough for a while now and I have no desire to return to that lifestyle. I much prefer not smoking pot. And after three months of abstinence, I can say I've chosen to make it permanent. The benefits are more mind blowing than a four foot bong hit.
-I can remember my dreams again.
-I am alert.
-I am more available to everybody, but most importantly my wife.
-My vision of the future for my family and me is hopeful and bright.
-When I sit at my desk in the morning I can think and function.
-I don't have to eat half a bag of Doritos before the Ben and Jerry's, every night.
-I go to bed earlier and get up earlier, which works much better for me.
-I am completing GT3 instead of just going 'round and 'round every night in Free Run.
-I am goal oriented and motivated to do things.
This isn't to say I was a bad guy before. I was just lazy and unmotivated. I would've said, "If I want to do something I'll do it." But it never came to be. And I sat on my ass and smoked pot and played video games and ate Doritos and ice cream too much of the time.
An example would be how last year I attempted to learn ASP, which is similar to PHP. Obviously it was a challenge. And eventually it all fell through because I wasn't motivated enough. After a month or so I'd made little headway and it just sorta tapered off. Of course I never consciously chose to quit trying, because that would be bad.
But I've taken up PHP and in a couple weeks have learned more useful, implementable scripts and basics of the language than I had in two months last year, when my brain was saturated in THC. I've noticed the difference and it might have taken me a little while to admit what it was. But it's obvious. It's because my mind is cleared, my spirit is lighter, and my future is brighter because I don't smoke pot.
Now I look back at those ten years and wonder what could've been. Where might I be today had I never started? It's not a useful way of thinking, and if I want to know the answer I just have to do it now. Then I'll know.
So that's my testimonial. Thanks for your attention.
p.s. my new avatar is meant to depict what it feels like.
Some of you may remember a few months back (or longer) where there was more than one thread either here or in the Opinions Forum regarding the pros and cons of marijuana. The discussions got a little heated at moments and I was in the thick of it, on the pro side. I knew at that time that I wasn't going to be a pothead until my deathbed, but had no way to comprehend or predict what the not-too-distant-future held. Things have changed a lot since then and I thought I'd confess, among other places and to other people, here.
I smoked pretty much every day for ten years, but don't any more. The last time I smoked was a couple days before my son was born. I knew the days of getting high were numbered, but only for a while, or so I thought at the time. I think I can remember thinking to myself that I'd buy a bag again, maybe in a few months, when he sleeps long enough for me to do it.
Well he's been sleeping long enough for a while now and I have no desire to return to that lifestyle. I much prefer not smoking pot. And after three months of abstinence, I can say I've chosen to make it permanent. The benefits are more mind blowing than a four foot bong hit.
-I can remember my dreams again.
-I am alert.
-I am more available to everybody, but most importantly my wife.
-My vision of the future for my family and me is hopeful and bright.
-When I sit at my desk in the morning I can think and function.
-I don't have to eat half a bag of Doritos before the Ben and Jerry's, every night.
-I go to bed earlier and get up earlier, which works much better for me.
-I am completing GT3 instead of just going 'round and 'round every night in Free Run.
-I am goal oriented and motivated to do things.
This isn't to say I was a bad guy before. I was just lazy and unmotivated. I would've said, "If I want to do something I'll do it." But it never came to be. And I sat on my ass and smoked pot and played video games and ate Doritos and ice cream too much of the time.
An example would be how last year I attempted to learn ASP, which is similar to PHP. Obviously it was a challenge. And eventually it all fell through because I wasn't motivated enough. After a month or so I'd made little headway and it just sorta tapered off. Of course I never consciously chose to quit trying, because that would be bad.
But I've taken up PHP and in a couple weeks have learned more useful, implementable scripts and basics of the language than I had in two months last year, when my brain was saturated in THC. I've noticed the difference and it might have taken me a little while to admit what it was. But it's obvious. It's because my mind is cleared, my spirit is lighter, and my future is brighter because I don't smoke pot.
Now I look back at those ten years and wonder what could've been. Where might I be today had I never started? It's not a useful way of thinking, and if I want to know the answer I just have to do it now. Then I'll know.
So that's my testimonial. Thanks for your attention.
p.s. my new avatar is meant to depict what it feels like.
