Solid Lifters
In Memoriam
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The Anatomy of a Fanboy
I have long been fascinated with the mindset of a hardcore Fanboy. Not the ones that promote their console as the best or just love it to death. I am talking about the ones that brush aside the competition and refuse to think other gaming platforms are worthy of playing. This is why I decided to take a satirical look at the anatomy of a hardcore fanboy. What makes them tick and why? So I sat down and had some die hard fanboys answer some questions in order to see the method behind their madness.
Ever since man made the very first console there has existed a seedy under-culture of gamers. These gamers have chosen something to stand by forever, and no its not graphics or the great games; its the company they stand behind, and why would someone base every decision regarding their gaming future based on a companys past success? The simple answer is fanboyism, a disease that has affected millions! They separate themselves from the good fanboys because they believe that they possess the greatest console on the planet without consideration for the others out there.
There are many degrees of fanboyism, but I wanted to get to the bottom of its food chain, the hardcore Sony, Microsoft, and Nintendo Fanboys. These are the truly motivated gamers who would rather have their manhoods smashed flat with hammers then play the competitors product, now thats devotion, in a weird creepy kind of way!
To understand the hardcore fanboy I needed to speak with some. So I searched, browsed and called around, and while most were eager to talk and get their opinions heard none would agree to show their faces. HMMMMMM! Could lack of self-confidence be a factor that creates a fanboy? Are Fanboys so self-conscious that they need an outside influence to give them that happy warm feeling? Maybe we will find out.
Finally my search yielded results. I was able to get 4 stark-raving mad fanboys, one for each platform. I sat down with each one individually and spoke to them about there chosen platform. I also spoke to them about the competition, which really gets a fanboy riled up, I feared for my life at one point!
Before we get to the questions I would like to introduce you to the fanboys:
Representing Sony is Mike Getz, a 27 year old die hard gamer who thinks Xboxs should be sold as paperweights.
In Nintendos corner is Raphael McDonald, a 26 year old Nintendo addict who thinks Sonys biggest innovation is ripping off Nintendo.
Xboxs main man is Rory Selner, a 30 year old engineer who thinks PC gaming is one step away from the grave.
Taking the hit for PCs is Marcus Winters, a 24 year old computer programmer who despises those who play console FPSs.
So I asked each one of them my first question: What about (insert platform here) makes it the best in your opinion
Raphael (Nintendo) Nintendo started it all, they deserve the highest spot on the gaming mantle. People are playing more and more violent games because of Sony and Microsoft, and I think that is horrible. Nintendo brings true innovation onto the landscape of gaming. The Wii will be the biggest innovation in gaming since Pong, and that is what gaming is about, anyone who says different is a noob!"
Mike (Sony) Sony for the past ten plus years has shown that they are the true gamers company. They have sold more consoles then the other 2 combined. They dont rush their products to market like some other companies do, and they dont try and milk their fans out of every last dollar. Sony = quality, and that has no chance of changing anytime soon. They will continue to dominate the gaming world for years to come, with technology like Blu-Ray and the Cell Chip Sony has again shown that they are the market leaders.
Rory (Microsoft) Why would anyone want to play anything else but Xbox. Xbox live is the greatest online service and it will never be beaten by the likes of Sony or Nintendo. Xbox has the best Fpss and best action games. Sony and Nintendo are for kids with too much free time. Xbox is for the true dedicated gamers, and with the 360 Microsoft has upped the bar and neither Sony nor Nintendo will reach it!"
Marcus (PC) "While all the console fanboys wade through the tech specs trying to determine which console is more powerful, I am playing on a system that is already more powerful then both of them. PC gaming is always ahead of the curve. Sure its more expensive, but if you are a true gamer you will find a way to pay for it. The PC offers better graphics, better control, and expandability, something that consoles lack."
These comments obviously reek of unsubstantiated bias, which is a defining characteristic of a Fanboy. Its the whole Its not as good because I say so argument This kind of mentality seems ludicrous to any smart person, but in the mind of a fanboy its just good logic.
To see how much hate they have for their competition I asked my next question. If you were stranded on a desert island with only a (competitors console) and a 42 Plasma, would you play it?
Mike (Sony) Yeah right so I could be frustrated when it crashes every two minutes. I dont think so; I would get a coconut and make up a new game."
Rory (Microsoft) Probably not, what are the chances that it would work anyways. It would most likely have a disc read error. I would take it apart and make a gadget MacGyver Style!
Marcus (PC) Maybe I would play it if I could not find food and went insane from the lack of nutrition, but that would be the only way, and even then I would be hallucinating so I would think that its a PC."
Raphael (Nintendo) HAHAHAHA, yeah right, I would more likely use it to wipe my A@#. If I was on a deserted island I would rather die of boredom then play those wastes of space!"
Ahh, so we have established hate based on nothing more then preference. Sounds like a guy we knew from Germany a few years back doesnt it. Ok, so comparing them to Hitler might be a bit extreme and unfair, but you cannot deny the same traits are there. These fanboys have no respect for the competition, which is very sad because they are missing out on some great games.
My final question: Some gamers look down on fanboys as the lowlifes of gaming. What do you have to say to all those who look down on you?
Marcus (PC) I could really give a crap about what others think. I know I am right and that is all I need to sleep at night.
Raphael (Nintendo) I really do not understand how anyone could look down on us as gamers. They know nothing of us at all. So if they look down on me fine! That does not change my opinion one bit.
Mike (Sony) I look down on those who would judge something they dont understand. What kind of idiot would do something like that?
Rory (Xbox) All those who look down on me can go to hell. I am a true gamer, I support the format that should win the console war, and that is all they need to know.
So what is it that makes a fanboy, a fanboy?
These questions revealed to me the ultimate character flaws in every fanboy. That first is one of prejudgment. I asked each one if they had played the competitions hardware at least once and each one of them said that they had at most 2 hours of play on those machines. How can you judge something if you have never given it a chance? This is like taking a Porsche for a test spin around the parking lot! It doesnt make much sense, but when has a fanboy ever made sense?
They must also possess a complete lack of reasoning. Being reasonable would kill every argument that they make and they would not be able to exist. Thus the lack of reasonability is a natural step in their evolution. Darwinism at work!
Next is a complete disregard of facts. I have personally witnessed fanboys proclaim that the Wiis graphics will not be far behind those of the PS3 and 360. It is those kinds of statements that make fanboys dangerous to our ears.
The belief in anything is another large fault all hardcore fanboys share. I am not trying to pick on Sony fanboys but they seem to be the biggest offenders in this category. Can you say Emotion Engine or Killzone 2. These fallaciess put forth by gaming companies are like fanboy cocaine; they give fanboys the first taste for free then they make them pay for it when they are hooked. Unfortunately there is no methadone clinic for fanboys.
The biggest and by far worst flaw that fanboys share is denial. Denial is the most prevalent trait and is the root to all the traits above. The sheer denial that another console or PC could offer up a fun gaming experience is at best monumentally dumb!
Please do not misunderstand what I am trying to state with this article. I have no ill will towards someone for liking a particular gaming device, but when fanboys get into the mix they do nothing but spread lies and false information which possibly leads to the younger generation making their choices based on opinions that are biased and horribly wrong. Every kind of gaming device out there deserves respect, yes even the NGAGE, and we as gamers should be proud to support our platform, or platforms of choice, but I ask the biased fanboys to keep their opinions to themselves.
If you know or are related to a fanboy, please get them help as soon as possible. If left untreated fanboyism can lead to friendlessitis, aholeiteria , and the horrid virginislifetimeus. Set up an intervention and seek treatment right away. Fanboyism is a communicable disease so make sure and keep a PSP or DS Lite with you at all times, just in case.
My message is simple, gaming is a choice and without choice we have no freedom.
Thanks to all the fanboys who were willing to speak with me even though they came out looking bad, you are truly a warriors for your cause.
http://www.aeropause.com/archives/2006/08/the_anatomy_of.php
I have long been fascinated with the mindset of a hardcore Fanboy. Not the ones that promote their console as the best or just love it to death. I am talking about the ones that brush aside the competition and refuse to think other gaming platforms are worthy of playing. This is why I decided to take a satirical look at the anatomy of a hardcore fanboy. What makes them tick and why? So I sat down and had some die hard fanboys answer some questions in order to see the method behind their madness.
Ever since man made the very first console there has existed a seedy under-culture of gamers. These gamers have chosen something to stand by forever, and no its not graphics or the great games; its the company they stand behind, and why would someone base every decision regarding their gaming future based on a companys past success? The simple answer is fanboyism, a disease that has affected millions! They separate themselves from the good fanboys because they believe that they possess the greatest console on the planet without consideration for the others out there.
There are many degrees of fanboyism, but I wanted to get to the bottom of its food chain, the hardcore Sony, Microsoft, and Nintendo Fanboys. These are the truly motivated gamers who would rather have their manhoods smashed flat with hammers then play the competitors product, now thats devotion, in a weird creepy kind of way!
To understand the hardcore fanboy I needed to speak with some. So I searched, browsed and called around, and while most were eager to talk and get their opinions heard none would agree to show their faces. HMMMMMM! Could lack of self-confidence be a factor that creates a fanboy? Are Fanboys so self-conscious that they need an outside influence to give them that happy warm feeling? Maybe we will find out.
Finally my search yielded results. I was able to get 4 stark-raving mad fanboys, one for each platform. I sat down with each one individually and spoke to them about there chosen platform. I also spoke to them about the competition, which really gets a fanboy riled up, I feared for my life at one point!
Before we get to the questions I would like to introduce you to the fanboys:
Representing Sony is Mike Getz, a 27 year old die hard gamer who thinks Xboxs should be sold as paperweights.
In Nintendos corner is Raphael McDonald, a 26 year old Nintendo addict who thinks Sonys biggest innovation is ripping off Nintendo.
Xboxs main man is Rory Selner, a 30 year old engineer who thinks PC gaming is one step away from the grave.
Taking the hit for PCs is Marcus Winters, a 24 year old computer programmer who despises those who play console FPSs.
So I asked each one of them my first question: What about (insert platform here) makes it the best in your opinion
Raphael (Nintendo) Nintendo started it all, they deserve the highest spot on the gaming mantle. People are playing more and more violent games because of Sony and Microsoft, and I think that is horrible. Nintendo brings true innovation onto the landscape of gaming. The Wii will be the biggest innovation in gaming since Pong, and that is what gaming is about, anyone who says different is a noob!"
Mike (Sony) Sony for the past ten plus years has shown that they are the true gamers company. They have sold more consoles then the other 2 combined. They dont rush their products to market like some other companies do, and they dont try and milk their fans out of every last dollar. Sony = quality, and that has no chance of changing anytime soon. They will continue to dominate the gaming world for years to come, with technology like Blu-Ray and the Cell Chip Sony has again shown that they are the market leaders.
Rory (Microsoft) Why would anyone want to play anything else but Xbox. Xbox live is the greatest online service and it will never be beaten by the likes of Sony or Nintendo. Xbox has the best Fpss and best action games. Sony and Nintendo are for kids with too much free time. Xbox is for the true dedicated gamers, and with the 360 Microsoft has upped the bar and neither Sony nor Nintendo will reach it!"
Marcus (PC) "While all the console fanboys wade through the tech specs trying to determine which console is more powerful, I am playing on a system that is already more powerful then both of them. PC gaming is always ahead of the curve. Sure its more expensive, but if you are a true gamer you will find a way to pay for it. The PC offers better graphics, better control, and expandability, something that consoles lack."
These comments obviously reek of unsubstantiated bias, which is a defining characteristic of a Fanboy. Its the whole Its not as good because I say so argument This kind of mentality seems ludicrous to any smart person, but in the mind of a fanboy its just good logic.
To see how much hate they have for their competition I asked my next question. If you were stranded on a desert island with only a (competitors console) and a 42 Plasma, would you play it?
Mike (Sony) Yeah right so I could be frustrated when it crashes every two minutes. I dont think so; I would get a coconut and make up a new game."
Rory (Microsoft) Probably not, what are the chances that it would work anyways. It would most likely have a disc read error. I would take it apart and make a gadget MacGyver Style!
Marcus (PC) Maybe I would play it if I could not find food and went insane from the lack of nutrition, but that would be the only way, and even then I would be hallucinating so I would think that its a PC."
Raphael (Nintendo) HAHAHAHA, yeah right, I would more likely use it to wipe my A@#. If I was on a deserted island I would rather die of boredom then play those wastes of space!"
Ahh, so we have established hate based on nothing more then preference. Sounds like a guy we knew from Germany a few years back doesnt it. Ok, so comparing them to Hitler might be a bit extreme and unfair, but you cannot deny the same traits are there. These fanboys have no respect for the competition, which is very sad because they are missing out on some great games.
My final question: Some gamers look down on fanboys as the lowlifes of gaming. What do you have to say to all those who look down on you?
Marcus (PC) I could really give a crap about what others think. I know I am right and that is all I need to sleep at night.
Raphael (Nintendo) I really do not understand how anyone could look down on us as gamers. They know nothing of us at all. So if they look down on me fine! That does not change my opinion one bit.
Mike (Sony) I look down on those who would judge something they dont understand. What kind of idiot would do something like that?
Rory (Xbox) All those who look down on me can go to hell. I am a true gamer, I support the format that should win the console war, and that is all they need to know.
So what is it that makes a fanboy, a fanboy?
These questions revealed to me the ultimate character flaws in every fanboy. That first is one of prejudgment. I asked each one if they had played the competitions hardware at least once and each one of them said that they had at most 2 hours of play on those machines. How can you judge something if you have never given it a chance? This is like taking a Porsche for a test spin around the parking lot! It doesnt make much sense, but when has a fanboy ever made sense?
They must also possess a complete lack of reasoning. Being reasonable would kill every argument that they make and they would not be able to exist. Thus the lack of reasonability is a natural step in their evolution. Darwinism at work!
Next is a complete disregard of facts. I have personally witnessed fanboys proclaim that the Wiis graphics will not be far behind those of the PS3 and 360. It is those kinds of statements that make fanboys dangerous to our ears.
The belief in anything is another large fault all hardcore fanboys share. I am not trying to pick on Sony fanboys but they seem to be the biggest offenders in this category. Can you say Emotion Engine or Killzone 2. These fallaciess put forth by gaming companies are like fanboy cocaine; they give fanboys the first taste for free then they make them pay for it when they are hooked. Unfortunately there is no methadone clinic for fanboys.
The biggest and by far worst flaw that fanboys share is denial. Denial is the most prevalent trait and is the root to all the traits above. The sheer denial that another console or PC could offer up a fun gaming experience is at best monumentally dumb!
Please do not misunderstand what I am trying to state with this article. I have no ill will towards someone for liking a particular gaming device, but when fanboys get into the mix they do nothing but spread lies and false information which possibly leads to the younger generation making their choices based on opinions that are biased and horribly wrong. Every kind of gaming device out there deserves respect, yes even the NGAGE, and we as gamers should be proud to support our platform, or platforms of choice, but I ask the biased fanboys to keep their opinions to themselves.
If you know or are related to a fanboy, please get them help as soon as possible. If left untreated fanboyism can lead to friendlessitis, aholeiteria , and the horrid virginislifetimeus. Set up an intervention and seek treatment right away. Fanboyism is a communicable disease so make sure and keep a PSP or DS Lite with you at all times, just in case.
My message is simple, gaming is a choice and without choice we have no freedom.
Thanks to all the fanboys who were willing to speak with me even though they came out looking bad, you are truly a warriors for your cause.
http://www.aeropause.com/archives/2006/08/the_anatomy_of.php
