Top Ten Ways To Bring Down The $29.2 Billion Budget Defecit
10. Coast guard only patrols in knee-deep water
9. Intimate Barbra Streisand concert for $1 billion a ticket
8. President Bush flies coach on Air Force One
7. Next Saturday, everyone in America has a yard sale
6. Make Cheney pay for his own medications
5. No fireworks until the deficit is down to $14 billion
4. Turn retired Navy ships into floating casinos
3. Only do nine jokes in Top Ten -- won't help budget, but will help morale
2. Cook the books
1. Impose $29.2 billion tax on everyone named "Oprah"
