Work/School related Jokes. . . .

  • Thread starter Pako
  • 7 comments
  • 474 views
Pako

Pako

Staff Emeritus
16,440
United States
NW Montana
GTP-Pako
GTP Pako
FROM NOW ON, WE ALL SHOULD GIVE 103%!

We have all been to those meetings where someone wants more than 100%.
Well here's how you do that. Here's how you can achieve 103%.

First of all, here's a little math that might prove helpful in the future.
How does one achieve 100% in LIFE?
Begin by noting the following.
IF:
A = 1
B = 2
C = 3
D = 4
E = 5
F = 6
G = 7
H = 8
I = 9
J = 10
K = 11
L = 12
M = 13
N = 14
O = 15
P = 16
Q = 17
R = 18
S = 19
T = 20
U = 21
V = 22
W = 23
X = 24
Y = 25
Z = 26

Then:
H A R D W O R K =
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = Only 98%

Similarly,
K N O W L E D G E =
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = Only 96%

But interesting (and as you'd expect),
A T T I T U D E =
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% ... This is how you achieve 100% in LIFE.

But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT TO NOTE (or REALIZE), is
B U L L S H * T =
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

So now you know what all those high-priced consultants, upper management,
and motivational speakers really mean when they want to exceed 100%!
 
and this one . . . .
 

Attachments

  • office.jpg
    office.jpg
    37.6 KB · Views: 32
A guy went to apply for a job with the U.S. Postal Service. During the interview, the interviewer asked the guy if he was a veteran. The guy said "Yes, I fought over in Vietnam."

Then the interviewer asked if the guy had any disabilities. The guy responded, "Well, I stepped on a landmine over there and blew my testicles off."

"Great!" the interviewer responded. "We give disabled vets preference. You can start tomorrow morning at 10 a.m."

"But doesn’t everyone normally start at 8 a.m.?" asked the guy.

"Yes, but you don’t have to come in until 10. All we do is just stand around and scratch our balls for the first two hours anyway."
 
Originally posted by Pako
A guy went to apply for a job with the U.S. Postal Service. During the interview, the interviewer asked the guy if he was a veteran. The guy said "Yes, I fought over in Vietnam."

Then the interviewer asked if the guy had any disabilities. The guy responded, "Well, I stepped on a landmine over there and blew my testicles off."

"Great!" the interviewer responded. "We give disabled vets preference. You can start tomorrow morning at 10 a.m."

"But doesn’t everyone normally start at 8 a.m.?" asked the guy.

"Yes, but you don’t have to come in until 10. All we do is just stand around and scratch our balls for the first two hours anyway."
Click to expand...


:eek: :lol:

Ye Gods, that's callous..... :lol:
 
hey I have two members of my immediate family that are USPS employees. They work harder than 90% of any other job in the nation. Tell me you guys, how would you hold up carring a 50-75 pound bag for a few miles and, in some areas, up flights and flights of stairs in hilly country? walking up hills for miles at a time? in 100 degree ranging to 15 degree farenight weather? doing this 30-40 hours a week? My dads a Postmaster(basically runs a citys post office) and my brother is a carrier. and even though my dad is supposed to only do"inside/desk work" now, hes always short on people so he ends up doing one or two routes at a time. and he's 48!

yes I know, its just a joke, but its also a common misconception:)
 
Hey Pako can u make an avatar like Tazz575's but it is just the car rounding the corner and making like a mud plat racer? Or just go thru how to do it wif me and I will make it myself.

Thanx
Mr GT2
 

Latest Posts

Back