15 Things to do before that big, important exam

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Mike Rotch

Mike Rotch

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1. When you get your copy of the test, run out screaming, "André, André, I've got the secret documents!"

2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, de- bate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking!" Then start talking about what a jerk the teacher is.

3. Bring your own private cheer- leaders (in uniform). Have them cheer loudly each time you answer a question.

4. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

5. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. When the instructor asks why, tell him in a very derogatory tone, "The light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a Clapper. DUH!"

6. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling, "I'm here, the Phantom of the Opera!" until they drag you away.

7. From the moment the test begins, hum the theme to "Jeopardy."

8. Bring a packet of crisps. As soon as the exam starts, open them as loudly as possible offer them to the people sitting around you.

9. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed because you have bad circulation.

10. Bring a large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often.

11. Come in wearing only your underwear. Halfway through the test, jump up and scream, "You mean this ISN'T a dream?" and run out of the room.

12. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer.

13. Set up a concession stand and sell lemonade, snacks, etc. Every now and then, walk around the room yelling, "Peanuts! Get your peanuts here!"

14. Halfway through the exam, turn it in. As you walk out, comment loudly on how easy it was.

15. Before the test starts, walk around your desk and mark your territory.
 
:lol:

Damn, some of them are really good ideas! :D

I've done #14 before, thank god I got good results on that or else it would've sucked big time. :eek:

#6 r0x0rZ. :lol:
 
In college my physics exam was a 300 question multiple choice exam. We had 2.5 hours to get it done. Basically, you had about 30 seconds for each question. Knowing that there was no way I was going to know every answer, I came up with a solution. Actually, my roommate and I came up with a solution.

We were both scheduled for the same exam period, so it was easy enough to do this. The students sat in every other row, so an open desk sat between us.

The first joke was that instead of wearing ties around our neck, we tied Nooses. Just to make the Prof laugh a bit.

About 15 minutes into the exam, the Prof non-chalantly saunters around the room to the back row where my roommate and I sat. The Prof had noticed that we had set something flat on the desk between us, and were handing it back and forth. Yes, he suspected we were cheating.

As he sneakily approached our desk, he had to stifle a serious laugh. The object we were passing back and forth was a spinner marked out with A, B, C, D and E.

For every question we didn't have a clue on the answer for, we hit the spinner. After the exam, the Prof kept the spinner as an example for other classes.

AO
 
Originally posted by Der Alta
In college my physics exam was a 300 question multiple choice exam. We had 2.5 hours to get it done. Basically, you had about 30 seconds for each question. Knowing that there was no way I was going to know every answer, I came up with a solution. Actually, my roommate and I came up with a solution.

We were both scheduled for the same exam period, so it was easy enough to do this. The students sat in every other row, so an open desk sat between us.

The first joke was that instead of wearing ties around our neck, we tied Nooses. Just to make the Prof laugh a bit.

About 15 minutes into the exam, the Prof non-chalantly saunters around the room to the back row where my roommate and I sat. The Prof had noticed that we had set something flat on the desk between us, and were handing it back and forth. Yes, he suspected we were cheating.

As he sneakily approached our desk, he had to stifle a serious laugh. The object we were passing back and forth was a spinner marked out with A, B, C, D and E.

For every question we didn't have a clue on the answer for, we hit the spinner. After the exam, the Prof kept the spinner as an example for other classes.

AO
Click to expand...

:lol:

Gotta choose your Profs carefully though. Some are a bit retentive in that regard and may throw the proverbial book at you.
 
i had a rubber which had abcd on the sides and i would chuck it in the air and what eva was facing up i choose. ahha.
 

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