An open apology and I need some advice

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CodeRedR51

CodeRedR51

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First I want to apologize to everyone that I have had a run in with recently. Life is really bad right now and I seem to take it out on everyone that doesn't deserve it. I've decided to scale back my mini-modding and posting here as a whole.

Second, I need some advice. I make hardly any money, I have to bum a ride to work every day with my brother, and I have parents that want me out of the house if I can't give them rent money this week. At this point I'm sick of living this life, and need out ASAP before I go crazy. The only way that I can move on and do what I want in the near future is if I purchase a car.

So, at this point the only thing that will make ME happy, and matters the most, is if I purchase a car. That means that I won't be able to make the rent payment this week. Threats are flying that I'll be kicked out of the house, and at this point I really don't care anymore. I would rather have a car and live in it, than live here and not have a car.

I'm honestly at my wits end here with seemingly no way out. What would you do?
 
Pay rent and start applying for better paying jobs or ask for more hours.

Happiness wise, well once rent is paid and everyone gets off your back a bit I'd start thinking positively about everything. How good the days are, how good it is to have a home, how good life really is. You're in a far better position than alot of other people and if those people can find happiness in what they do then it shouldn't be hard for you to do the same.

On the car front....positive thinking leads to motivation and being proactive towards that goal of owning another car. If you focus on that goal and manage the small amount you make a week to cover living expenses and savings for a car then you'll likely find that goal of yours becoming closer and closer to reality.

(Sorry if it all sounds a bit hippy talk or from a self help book but positive thinking really does do wonders to your state of mind)
 
Just make sure the car has a TV and you park it near a house with am open wifi network. :p
Joking aside, as I understand that this is a tough time for you, I'd say that you need to get back into college somehow.
That is unless you can put GTAcademy National Finalist on a job application. Which has lead me to an idea...
Do you have any local karting track near you by any chance? Either indoor or outdoor.
 
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You said you work, Finance it!
 
Sometimes in life there is no visible way forward. I have really been there myself. But never give up because you never know what tomorrow brings.

As for your situation, what are your alternatives? Can you make more money? Can you pay more money? Can you get better educated? Can you get a better job?

This is how you get a car of your own, a home of your own. Unless you can marry a rich older celebrity.
 
B) At your age, you need to move out of your parents’ place.
1) Spend money on what’s most appropriate. Number one on that list is usually housing.

Move out, spend <$5 a day on meals, save money. It&#8217;s what I&#8217;ve been doing for the past few years and despite the fact that I come from a poor family and left college with $8k of debt, one year later I&#8217;m debt-free and am enjoying a (relatively) expensive beer at the moment.
 
That's the thing though, I have the job I have now because I have a ride to get there. I can't switch jobs because I would have no way to get there. Right now my ultimate goals are to attend schooling for Meteorology then living somewhere I can be successful in that area. That might mean going to school in Oklahoma and living in Texas if i had my way. Then again, I can't get there without a car. You see where this keeps coming back to needing a car?

Edit: @ Sage: I totally agree with you. Even though my college bills are just north of $20k, for an education that hardly exists anymore, I do agree.

There was talk of a raise floating around last week, I'm going to inquire about that tomorrow. I'd love to get my own place, but I don't have the money right now for the move-in deposit. :(
 
You could buy a bike for travelling on. I have one and it saves me a fortune in travel costs and keeps me fit at the same time.
 
I just sold my bike because I needed the money.

I honestly have no idea what to do. Feeling a bit overwhelmed.
 
Have you tried taking a step back, clear your head and focus on the first obstacle that poses the biggest problem.
 
Yep, no transportation. Despite making people angry, I think that's the first step that needs to be taken. Either that, or an apartment close to work so I can walk there. Everything around here is $500+ a month though.
 
You're getting a lift to work right? No need for a car just yet...first thing first would be accomodation, pay rent and get your parents off your back. Once that's sorted then work from there.
 
My main problem is, if I continue to pay that rent (which is too much in the first place) then I won't have anything left to save. I've already decided to cancel the internet at home that is under my name, so I'll be saving on that monthly fee plus I won't need netflix anymore either. I'm also going to look into canceling my Verizon account this week and going with a pay as you go phone.

Little bit at a time, but I'll get it there.
 
But what happens when you stop paying rent? You'll no doubt be kicked out and that'll increase you're problems as you'll have no accommodation or car...You're better off paying rent and trying to negotiate to pay less in an effort to buy a car. You can use that line in your efforts to reduce your rent (I want to buy a car and move out, I need the rent to be less so I can do that and get out of your hair) which would go a long way to solving the current dilemma.
 
MitchZ06
But what happens when you stop paying rent? You'll no doubt be kicked out and that'll increase you're problems as you'll have no accommodation or car...You're better off paying rent and trying to negotiate to pay less in an effort to buy a car. You can use that line in your efforts to reduce your rent (I want to buy a car and move out, I need the rent to be less so I can do that and get out of your hair) which would go a long way to solving the current dilemma.
Click to expand...

This is your best bet.
 
A car, no matter how cheap, is not going to be $500 a month cheap.

Fundamentals first. Place to sleep. Clothes to sleep in... perhaps pick up a rotten old motorbike or bicycle to take to work if you can't keep bumming a ride. If you feel bad about bumming a ride, split the gas.

Look at it this way. Life sucks. But:

1. You have a job.
2. You have a roof over your head.
3. You have a way to get to said job from underneath said roof.

Negotiate conditions. If you can present a plan to your parents as to how you're going to manage striking out on your own, in exchange for a break or a discount in rent, they'll probably get off your back.

Wish you the best of luck. It's not easy...
 
I agree with alot of what is being said here, I'd say do the bike thing like Niky said. If it be a bicycle, moped or actural 250cc crotch rocket. They're all cheap, cost wise, gas wise, and they give you a set of wheels to get to work. I'd say pay the rent for now if you can and work towards getting the bike. Then you wont have to ask for a ride which may lead to you being able to pick up more shifts or doubling up and thus making more money.

I'd also say try to find a way back to college and work hard towards a degree. I have one degree already but where I live there is no work in it and so I have to do a small time job instead until I can go back to school. I'm also married so I can't leave town and try to live somewhere else while my wife is going to school, this would cost me more money. Times are tough for alot of people and it seems obvious with your story. Like everyone is saying, don't give up, keep on trying and if you do something will come. Good luck to you!
 
Prepare a budget: list your income, expenses and all your possessions with fair value estimates.

Prioritise your expense list into Necessities and Luxuries and rank them accordingly. An important step is to have someone else look at your prioritisation and give you an objective viewpoint. Reason being, you only cut your netflix and internet now, that would have been the first thing to go if I was struggling with cash and my job didn't require internet access.

Do the same with your possessions of material value.

This should give you a good understanding on how you would need to spend cash in the short term as well as highlight any possible savings you can make.

Regarding your accommodation situation, why do your parents want to kick you out if you were paying rent?
 
We've all been there at one time or another... torn between saving up for the future and splurging on something that we see as necessary for that future. If that splurge just happens to be a wedding or a house... something that will pay dividends over time... why not? Life isn't going to get any easier or cheaper in the future!

But a car is most emphatically not that life-changing, life-saving investment. Been there, done that... pay for a car when you're not well-off financially and it will only cost you in terms of lost opportunities.

I understand that it seems mighty important to be mobile, but there are times when you have to suck it up and do it the hard way. Despite having a motor vehicle at my disposal after getting married, I spent a lot of time commuting (it was A LOT, because the bus stop was blocks away, and I had to hoof it) just to save up. I know it's not quite the same over there (due to poor or non-existent bus service, depending on where you live), but there are ways...
 
A lot of people have money worries, but just summing up current situation:

- You have somewhere to sleep. You pay rent to parents for this, but as much as your parents want you to move out I'm sure they wouldn't turf you out on your backside either. They should be there to help you out rather than cause the major issue. And besides, better them than a landlord who will only care for one thing....
- You have a job. The hardest thing about a job is getting the foot through the door. Beyond that, you can see if more hours are available, or look at chances of promotion etc. Plus there will be more people there that can help you out if required. Maybe someone is looking to rent out a room and could bargain a deal? Plus they'd provide transportation...
- You currently have a way of getting to work, even if it seems like you are slumming it to do so.

As far as I can see from this, getting a car is the LAST thing you need. Although it would slightly help on the "getting to work issue", financially it would finish you. You had to sell a bicycle for money, and with a bike it is a one off payment and then it is yours. With a car you pay FAR more for it in the first place, and then paying for it never ends. What about fuel? When there are far better alternatives around as well, another financial worry is not the answer.
 
R1600, look at things responsibly dude. Your parents will kick you out IF YOU DON'T PAY RENT. Guess what, you don't pay rent to real estate agents and they will kick you out quick smart!! Your parents are just showing you the reality of the world to wake you up. If you have a crappy job, find another crappy job that pays better or find a second crappy job. Just in the past 48 hours I've gone from being employed to unemployed to employed for $150/week more doing easier work in the same field. Put your name in with employment agencies, check the classifieds, ask people around the area if they know of any work going, stuff like that. You'll find something out there, you just have to look in the right places. 👍

If you think it's that bad, work out whether it's cheaper to live away from your parents rather than with them, and do the figures properly. 👍
 
R1600Turbo
You see where this keeps coming back to needing a car?
Click to expand...

That is your mind playing tricks on you, try to take distance and analyze again.

================

Not clear of your qualifications, but can you get a job comes with a car (even if it is restricted use). Going on-site at clients for the company you work for will do that and might stop your urge a little.

I believe you should work on your Emotional Intelligence (get to know yourself and the way you work):

1) Get a goal: why not: How to get a car?
2) Plan for that goal: when I use resources for living, what is left (can I increase it). What do I do in education, social networking, searching work, reducing costs to improve my situation to reach my goal. Investment can lead to better results on the long term.
3) If a disappointment comes up (seems your case at the moment) how do I handle it. Can I handle the disappointments (they will come) when my plan does not work out the way I expected ...

It will probably not be like in the film "The pursuit of Happiness" but it is a story about the topic.

Your family seems a good support, do not burn bridges, but negotiate and try to gain independence (might be a first goal).

Coldplay:
Nobody said it was easy, nobody said it would be so hard.
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Forget the car. right now, you want a car, you don't need one.. You need a roof to sleep under, thus go for the rent. Cars can wait.
 
A car is simply another expense, it will not make your life easier. There are better options for someone in your position and they've all been expressed - continue getting rides, bike (either self powered or engine), bus, walk. When you're at a point where you are able to make it on your own and you have enough money coming in to pay for gas and the inevitable maintenance, then you buy a car. You don't buy one in anticipation of living in it.

I'm sure it sounds like a good idea to be able to get away from what you see as a taxing situation but where are you planning on showering? Where are you going to cook your food (eating out all the time is expensive)?
 
If the worst does happen and you get your marching orders, is there a person closer to work you can live with? Rent a room off someone. Sleeping in a car sucks big hairy *****!
 
As i don't know your relation with your parents, i can't really give an advice.

But did you try talking with one of your parents (the one you get along the most), try to reason with them, without getting emotional (that will not be helpful), try to lower the rent a bit, say that you want to save up for your own place and in order to do that you need your parents to come a bit in your direction.
Maybe lowering the rent by more helping out in the house chores.

I mean your parents surely want you to succeed in life. For that you need a proper start.
If they help you with lowering the rent a bit, they help you out with the saving, and they get what they want : you move out sooner.

Otherwise if the above is not possible, try to squat at some friends place, or find a friend to rent a flat together -> Cost reduction.

A car will always cost : gas, insurance, repairs, parking,....

I always tend to say : If there is a problem , solve it. Dont chicken out and you'll be rewarded.
Most people tend to go another direction when problems occur, that is the human nature of course, beeing lazy (i am myself).
But try hard to solve the problem with your parents and the reward will be having a healthy relationship with your parents for a long time.
Move out now and there will be tensions between you and your parents.

Now as i said, i don't know your parents, stupid parents (seen in general not just by you) are also common, so if that's the case forget what i said.

EDIT: Correction . Wow didn't know that that word was that offensive. LOL
 
See if you can apply for walfare from the government.

You pay taxes so you should not feel bad if you need to do so if you are having a hard time getting money.
 
Thanks guys.

To those suggesting I ask for more hours, not really possible since I already work full time. I was told last week that we might be doing some moving around at work that could result in more pay, but with this company it's not guaranteed ever.

I've decided to pay what I can this week and leave it at that. I've already canceled our internet service, put my concert ticket I bought a couple weeks ago up for sale, and will be selling my G27 shortly. (anyone wants it, PM me) I'll also be walking around my neighborhood this weekend looking for part time jobs that I can do on the weekend.
 
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