- 24,344
- Midlantic Area
- GTP_Duke
I wouldn't go through high school again for a million dollars. Well, I would if I could keep all the stuff I've learned in the intervening 20 years...
The inner beauty definitely exists. You will find, after you've been close with a person that is your friend and makes you feel good, that they are beautiful. You just didn't notice it at first.
In high school I hung out with a bunch of people who didn't give a crap about being "in". We called ourselves the "Anti-clique clique". We weren't like a bunch of goths or punks who purposely did the opposite of what the popular kids were doing. That's letting conformity rule your life just as surely as if you tried to keep up with the flavor of the week. Yeah, we were geeks. But you know what? I went to an alumni thing about 10-12 years after graduation, and all the "hot" people were just as overweight, just as balding, and just as pestered by their kids as I was. Plus they all still feel the need to keep in contact with each other and send news of every little promotion and raise and whatever. I, on the other hand, have moved on with my life and am not stuck trying to relive old days and impress old people.
Don't worry about your image one way or the other. It takes some nerve and strength, but spend your formative years deciding what YOU are and what YOU like. Defining yourself in terms of how other people see you is a waste of time and energy, and it will never satisfy you.
You'd be amazed at how little my philosophy, interests, desires, and personality have changed in 20 years. That's because I did it right (for me) the first time, instead of worrying about what was right for others. The only real change is that I have developed more confidence from seeing my choices proven right (for me) over the years.
I found a mate who is remarkably similar. OK, so we got together 2 or 3 years later than some of the more poular crowd. But that's all; and it was worth the wait, and we're still together.
PS to Deliverator: Don't close your mind like that. Decide what is right for you, yes, but don't try to attract or reject other people. Especially don't judge 51% of the population out of hand like that. Women aren't important to you right now? Fine, no problem, but don't go out of your way to avoid them. Just judge each person on their own merits or evils, and let yourself find similar folks while ignoring those that don't match.
The inner beauty definitely exists. You will find, after you've been close with a person that is your friend and makes you feel good, that they are beautiful. You just didn't notice it at first.
In high school I hung out with a bunch of people who didn't give a crap about being "in". We called ourselves the "Anti-clique clique". We weren't like a bunch of goths or punks who purposely did the opposite of what the popular kids were doing. That's letting conformity rule your life just as surely as if you tried to keep up with the flavor of the week. Yeah, we were geeks. But you know what? I went to an alumni thing about 10-12 years after graduation, and all the "hot" people were just as overweight, just as balding, and just as pestered by their kids as I was. Plus they all still feel the need to keep in contact with each other and send news of every little promotion and raise and whatever. I, on the other hand, have moved on with my life and am not stuck trying to relive old days and impress old people.
Don't worry about your image one way or the other. It takes some nerve and strength, but spend your formative years deciding what YOU are and what YOU like. Defining yourself in terms of how other people see you is a waste of time and energy, and it will never satisfy you.
You'd be amazed at how little my philosophy, interests, desires, and personality have changed in 20 years. That's because I did it right (for me) the first time, instead of worrying about what was right for others. The only real change is that I have developed more confidence from seeing my choices proven right (for me) over the years.
I found a mate who is remarkably similar. OK, so we got together 2 or 3 years later than some of the more poular crowd. But that's all; and it was worth the wait, and we're still together.
PS to Deliverator: Don't close your mind like that. Decide what is right for you, yes, but don't try to attract or reject other people. Especially don't judge 51% of the population out of hand like that. Women aren't important to you right now? Fine, no problem, but don't go out of your way to avoid them. Just judge each person on their own merits or evils, and let yourself find similar folks while ignoring those that don't match.
I actually said that - I *am* getting old) Go out, have fun, be responsible and vary your selection in women. 
