I really don't know what to say. I'm not sure if I will be giving up on racing or not. Either way, I have fallen into a great depression. I'm really just tired of it all, never being fast enough to prove to myself or the real world that I'm making any real progress. I feel so pathetic. Nothing can help me now, I just don't have the talent. So, since I am in deep internal struggle and sorrow, I am leaving this site. So please, just ban me. I won't be coming back. Actually, I beg you! Please ban me! I should have been banned months ago anyway! It would be the perfect finish to the Tragedie of RyanRacer. So farwell, GTPlanet. My time here was short, but it was the best time of my life, especially since I was in glorious denial thinking I was actually fast (lolnope).
My blaze of shame
...
Hello
@RyanRacer - if you are still around. Or have you left and not been compelled to click on this thread (let alone GTPlanet)?
Perceive, please, that many have taken notice of your notes of frustration, internal struggles, and great depression about your lack of speed on the virtual race-tracks of a driving simulator - and provided attention from light-hearted comments, no doubt intending to cheer you up, to serious heart-to-hearts that hold sound advice.
First thing - whether you may have been aware before or not - seems like people (total strangers, anonymous UserIDs, or even people you might know IRL) actually have taken the time and effort to give you some attention - irrespective of the fact that you have declared yourself 'unfit' or 'worthy' of GTPlanet (and therefore of the textual limelight you crave.)
Think about it.
It's all about 'Expectations'.
Re-form the expectations you have about Life. Examine the expectations you have about yourself. Be realistic.
Would being the 'fastest racer' on GTPlanet make you happy? Worthy? Of what? Why?
If you were to ask the guys who 'race' with me whether I'm 'fast' they'd probably fall over laughing. I'm one of the more famous 'backmarkers' on the circuit - but I'm never at a loss for people to play with.
And being at GTPlanet, fusing my love of the Gran Turismo series (and other 'racing' games I play) with sharing my experiences here only enhances the positive and social side of the experience.
If it will make you feel any better, come race with me. I won't let you win. But you might.
Cheers.

H.