Fatmouse: I before ye, except after sea.

[Famine]

So do I get to join the club or what?

Interested in joining Fatmouse? You do not become a cynic. You either are already a cynic. Or you are not a cynic. It is something you are, not what you become.

PM me because I don't come on all that regularly...

On this I can guarantee that Fatmouse will be, as ever, unmoved.

My vexations have a japanese 'theme'!

-people in positions of power or import (politicians, doctors, teachers, lawyers, professors, lawmakers) being caught soliciting, paying for, engaging in sex with minors.
This happens far too often in this country.

You have JPop. I think this both a reason and an explanation.

 

[DQuaN]

How about how the commercials can be timed where I can flip through ALL SIX presets on my radio and EVERY SINGLE ONE is playing COMMERCIALS.

I really hate radio sometimes.

This happens on Sky TV over here. 400+ channels of Adverts. It drives me nuts.

 

[donbenni]

The joys of student life:

- Landlords who seem to think that because they have your mobile number they can call you at any time of the day even when you're at uni and demand your time.

- Landlords who ignore every request to fix problems with the house for weeks and weeks and then try to fob you off with pathetic solutions e.g. my house mate had no curtains in his room for at least a month and when they finally accepted it was a problem provided a pair of curtains which covered exactly 2/3 of the window when closed.

- Handymen hired by the landlord to fix the aforementioned problems who promised to be around in the morning and then turned up a 4 in the afternoon.

- The smart Royal Mail delivery man who thought he'd deliver a package to my house at 7:30am. When the package wasn't delivered it was sent to the "local" post warehouse which is miles away. When i tried to call them to rearrange a delivery it took 2 days before i actually got through to someone to sort it out.

- When you go "all in" with a high two-pair only to be beaten by 3 of a kind twos.

- Electric ovens that burn everything.

- Computers that continuously crash when you're trying to work on your dissertation.

- The return of Fat Mouse when you're trying to work on your dissertation.

 

[Kylehnat]

Public laundry rooms: when one person does 3 or 4 loads all at once, leaving one or two washers/dryers for the other 90 people who live here. I love it when people are inconsiderate jackasses.

 

[TopHat]

Listening to XM radio with its claimed commercial free service, and 25 minutes out of an hour its a commercial for themselves. The O&A Show on 202 etc.

 

[Evolution.]

Windows Firewall blocking a Windows update .exe file.

 

[Gen.]

Windows Firewall blocking a Windows update .exe file.

Jesus Christ, seriously, windows firewall is the worst firewall ever, turn it off

 

[Evolution.]

I know. I don't even know how it is on.

 

[Der Alta]

Expected Validation and Praise of Mediocrity.

Yes, the person that thinks “They’re all that and a bag of chips.” And wonders why no one congratulates them on a job well done.

They are stuck on themselves and believe that all should worship the ground they walk on. Their arrival should always be heralded with trumpets, and we should stop what we are doing just to admire them on the way by. I have a real issue with those that think they are the most important person in the room. When one good look at the people in the room will immediately inform everyone of their status.

I have a sub contractor that expects everyone to get out of his way. He believes that his work is the most important part of the building. He expects me to clear everyone elses material out of the way so that he can put his in the easiest accessible point. Keep in mind, he’s already been given ample room in which to store his material. He simply expects everyone else to store their material else where while he can spread out as much as he needs. His crew worked on Saturday. 9 hours. This was to make up for the two days that he had missed earlier in the week. At the end of the day, he expected me to thank him for getting his crew there on a Saturday.

The people that do their job as minimally as possible, and expect us to praise them for doing it. A lady friend of mine has a husband who works hard to provide money so that she doesn’t have to work a full time job. No kids, but two dogs. She’ll clean the house and then complain to my wife that her husband doesn’t immediately notice when he gets home and compliment her on doing it. The same woman that when having done a load of laundry expects a showering of thank you’s for it. Yet, he’s already done two that week, plus the grocery shopping, and the cooking for them.

A few years back a coworker always made others aware what time he arrived in the morning. He arrived at 6am each morning, and liked to say that he was top notch and dedicated because of that. Yet he always when home at 2:30 in the afternoon, as he had finished his 8 hour day. Never worked any overtime. Others were consistently pushed to complete his work, as it incomplete due to him leaving early in the day. He was very upset when he was passed over for a raise and was later overheard talking to the boss about it. He just couldn’t grasp the fact, that doing your job as expected did not warrant an increase in pay. I can remember one exchange that really stumped him. He exclaimed to the boss “What about all my early mornings?” to which the boss replied “What about all your early afternoons?”

Last summer I was at a friend’s house for one of his child’s party. One of the child’s friends (8 years old) was on the diving board screaming for his mother to watch him jump off the diving board. Yes, 3 feet above the water in the pool. The mother finally looked at him, and he jumped. She praised him, and I whispered, just loud enough for her to hear. “Fantastic, praise the idiot for falling off a board into water.” It upset her quite a bit, that I would not offer validation of her sons abilities. Thus began the verbal sword fight. There was my mention of her sons extraordinary grasp of gravity and water, also noting him being secured in a life jacket. Her accusations of my scorn for her off spring. My acknowledgement of the runts ability to flounder to the edge of the pool and my suggestion of him becoming a shark fisherman, as they are always looking for chum. Her admonishment of me ridiculing her brilliant child. My acknowledgement that brilliance looks to run in the family. And so on, until ending with me leaving early as not to upset the other kids due to the hysterical mother. Yes, she was the raving lunatic, but I caused it.

I could present myriad examples of Expected Validation and Praise of Mediocrity, as the workplace is overrun with it. Take a trip to the local mall if it won’t make you sick, and watch children and parents of today. If you’d like, take a look through any online forum. Anyone with the name “King” in their username is very likely to follow this trend.

Here’s a prime example. I just finished construction of the newest A.C. Moore Store. I delivered it a week earlier than the original schedule had planned. Not bad for a 3 month project. When delivering the news that we had an Occupancy Permit and the owner could take possession of the building, my boss simply said “Good. Now let’s concentrate on the next project.”

I did my job and what was expected of me. No expectation of congratulatory parade, nor showers of cash falling from the sky. Simply put, I did my job as expected of me.

The real world holds a stunning shock for these people that cannot understand the simple fallacy of Expected Validation and Praise of Mediocrity.

Next rant, “Feigned competence”

 

[sn00pie]

Make love, fatmouse, not war.

 

[emad]

Next rant, “Feigned competence”

Hehehe, you should read the reports/analyses I have to write for my e-learning technologies class. They're a total load of bs and I have neither the time nor the patience to try and mask the odor.

Strangely, the first of them got an 80%... I wonder how I did on the other two

 

[Master_Yoda]

- Those who say things only to comfort themselves (i.e: "I need to lose weight..I'm going on a diet" and then you see them at McD's chowing on a double cheeseburger with fries).

Did those people say what kind of diet there going on? Cause if they were going on a McD's diet... That would explain it!

 

[Pupik]

He just couldn’t grasp the fact, that doing your job as expected did not warrant an increase in pay. I can remember one exchange that really stumped him. He exclaimed to the boss “What about all my early mornings?” to which the boss replied “What about all your early afternoons?”

I have a few co-workers and consultants like this: "Early" means showing up on time, as expected. "Staying Late" is equivalent to leaving 20 minutes early, so they don't (potentially) stay one minute after closing, even when paid on commission. They also are famed for calling in "sick" about 90 minutes after the doors opened for business. This means a few of us have to stay later to pick up the slack. Or the night crew has to deal with their problems, on top of their issues while working with a skeleton crew.

Later, they are the first to get turned down for a raise and/or promotion, while encourage low survey scores, and miss out on bonuses. Yet somehow, they can't figure out why these things happen.

 

[Duke]

Expected Validation and Praise of Mediocrity.

A few years back a coworker always made others aware what time he arrived in the morning. He arrived at 6am each morning, and liked to say that he was top notch and dedicated because of that. Yet he always when home at 2:30 in the afternoon, as he had finished his 8 hour day. Never worked any overtime. Others were consistently pushed to complete his work, as it incomplete due to him leaving early in the day.

And, of course, since none of the rest of you showed up before 7:30a-8:00a, that left him plenty of 'alone time' to drink his coffee, eat his breakfast, read his paper, catch up on his personal email...

I've worked with him, too. I believe he's currently working in my wife's office.

Next rant, “Feigned competence”

I can't wait!

 

[TopHat]

Playing an Instrument badly, knowing you play it badly, but still continuing to play it.


Fatmouse + you = Fatmouse

 

[Zrow]

Last summer I was at a friend’s house for one of his child’s party. One of the child’s friends (8 years old) was on the diving board screaming for his mother to watch him jump off the diving board. Yes, 3 feet above the water in the pool. The mother finally looked at him, and he jumped. She praised him, and I whispered, just loud enough for her to hear. “Fantastic, praise the idiot for falling off a board into water.” It upset her quite a bit, that I would not offer validation of her sons abilities. Thus began the verbal sword fight. There was my mention of her sons extraordinary grasp of gravity and water, also noting him being secured in a life jacket. Her accusations of my scorn for her off spring. My acknowledgement of the runts ability to flounder to the edge of the pool and my suggestion of him becoming a shark fisherman, as they are always looking for chum. Her admonishment of me ridiculing her brilliant child. My acknowledgement that brilliance looks to run in the family. And so on, until ending with me leaving early as not to upset the other kids due to the hysterical mother. Yes, she was the raving lunatic, but I caused it.

That's great.

 

[Keef]

Playing an Instrument badly, knowing you play it badly, but still continuing to play it.


Fatmouse + you = Fatmouse

Remember, Fatmouse is unmoved by one's personal distress.

 

[Kylehnat]

Playing an Instrument badly, knowing you play it badly, but still continuing to play it.

I'm guessing that you have never played an instrument.

 

[Kylehnat]

Yet he always when home at 2:30 in the afternoon, as he had finished his 8 hour day. Never worked any overtime. Others were consistently pushed to complete his work, as it incomplete due to him leaving early in the day.

I've only been working full-time for 6 weeks, but I already sympathize with that. We have a couple people in our group who punch out the instant that their 8 hours have passed, no matter how much work there is left to do. It's interesting (read: obvious) that these are also the people who waste the most time during the day. If I were to leave after 8 hours, it would be equivalent to 11 or 12 hours of their work. Nevertheless, when these folks leave at 4, it means the rest of us must stay longer to finish everything that needs to be done. We all laugh on payday, though (and when bonuses are handed out). Still, it's a puzzlement as to why some people have such a lazy work ethic when it's quite clear that everyone around them is busting their ass.

 

[3-Wheel Drive]

I got a few political vexations myself.

- The fundi bunch (Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, Robert Tilton, etc.)
- John Kerry
- Any politican that makes a sweeping judgement without providing substantial proof
- Someone who claims they are republican, democrat, green, etc. That act like in no way to what they claim (Joe Liberman, or John McCain anyone?)
- The Socialist Workers Party.

That's similar to my political vexations, which are as follows:

- Politics

 

[Flame-returns]

Personal (recent) vexations

-'I'm not racist/homophobic/prejudiced but....'
eg
'I'm not racist but I think all Muslim's should not be allowed to board aircraft until they have had their carry on luggage searched through and then destroyed to risk them bombing my plane and I think they should be made to ride seperate buses so they don't kill innocent people.'
Hang on a second... You said you're not a racist.

-Jamie 'Supernanny' Oliver. Do you have to undergo special training to become that conceited or is it just a genetic thing?

- People who see fit to impose their (often crappy) music collection on other people. There are far too many people listening to their mp3 ringtones on buses, it is a serious problem and it requires a set of drastic laws in order to rectify:
1) A maximum limit of 30 seconds of phone speaker noise. Headphones are fine, speakers are not. I demand a law that requires mobile manufacturers to put some kind of limiter on speaker usage time.
2) Illegalisation of battery powered travel speakers. Yep, I'm serious. Battery powered spdeakers are retarded. If you want to use your speakers indoors why not pwer them off the mains? If you want to use the outside, where outlets are few and far between, you deserve to be shot.
3) Penalty of death for excess mnoise pollution on transport at rush hour. Everyone is tired, cramped, and irritated at rush hour - not a single person wants to hear the garbage that you class as music!

 

[Der Alta]

“Feigning competence”
A Rant in three parts.​

Part 1: The art of Pulling off the Act of Them thinking You know more than You do.

I’ve done it, you’ve done it, they’ve done it, and we all do it. How else do you bargain yourself into a better position? It’s the ultimate poker game, where noone really gets to see the cards. They only get to think they see the cards. It’s up to you to prove that you do, indeed have those cards in your hand. Some call it “It’s not what you know, but what they think you know”. A perfect example, would be embellishing your resume. They say “you’ve used XXX software?” You know you’ve used it, but you aren’t knowledgeable in it. Will you ever need to use it? Probably not, but at least they think you can. That is “feigning competence”.

You’ve built things before. Like a dog house, or a tree fort, or a shed. Do you think you’ve got enough knowledge to build a 30,000 sf office building? That’s not feigning competence, that’s stupidity. You were the lead carpenter on a custom home construction crew for 2 years. Could you build a 30,000 sf ? That’s feigning competence, because they think you can and you’ve got the chance to make them think you can.

Feigning Competence is a necessary evil in this world. You need it to get ahead, they need it to expand their business. After all, if they’ve never done that before, they have to make the client think they have the ability to do that. It works at every rung. You’ve never swung a hammer, but you’ve labored on enough job sites to know how it goes together. They’ve never done brain surgery, but they’ve done enough research that someone thinks they can.

Part 2: The results of Feigning Competence
That is how anyone and everyone gets ahead. It is one of the biggest downfalls of society that I have witnessed. We all struggle to garner our next pay raise. We all seek ways to get noticed at our jobs. 70 years ago, you worked for a company for 30 years and retired from there. They took care of the people that worked for them, because there was dedication to an employer and an employee. Everyone knew what you could and could not do. No one needed to feign competence, because you were competent at your job. You worked hard at it, and became the best you could be at your job. The company rewarded you for that.

As the world turned, someone got the bright idea of making it look like they knew more than they did. The blame game started. If you were in over your head, and pulled it off, you were a hero. If it blew up in your face, you needed to have a scapegoat. You planned who was to blame, and why it wasn’t your fault. Someone on your team dropped the ball and it blew the schedule all the way out. The steel manufacturer couldn’t get the steel here, so the assembly line couldn’t make the brake pads. They, in turn, slowed the production of the drive train, which affected the entire car development. That’s why you didn’t get the cars off the line when you said you would.

Sidebar: I suppose I could spin another rant off on this about how tight this world has made schedules. You plan it as tight as possible, and bank on no hiccups. You never get to plan for a hiccup.

In essence, you didn’t know how to complete the project or fulfill the objective you had before you, and you failed. In some instances, you might get lucky and pull it off, other times, you might not.

Part 3: Dealing with others that Feign Competence.
What happens when others feign competence and you’re stuck dealing with it.

In the project that I’m dealing with right now, there is a leasing department. They’re trying to lease space in the building I’m building. They keep making changes to the plans and layouts while I’m trying to build this. As I struggle through it, the designer is moving doors and windows, and spaces. She is concentrating on what the appearance of the building is. I’m trying to finish all the underground utilities and she won’t stop making changes. If she moves a wall, it affects where my plumbing and my electrical is. This means my inspections have to be redone, and my concrete slab gets delayed. I also have submittals on doors and windows that have to be redone. I once had a boss that loved the saying “Arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.” It basically means you’re worrying about something insignificant, and there is something more serious that you should be paying attention to.

This woman is feigning competence, and she’s getting caught in it. She’s overwhelmed with the complexities at hand and won’t admit she needs some help. If she admits she needs help, her boss will know she is overpaid for what she’s doing. There are myriad others that are in the same boat. You’ve seen them at the McDonalds window drive through. You’ve seen them behind the counter at the bank. You’ve seen them in business meetings. No, I won’t use GWB as an example.

They’re everywhere. Its how the world moves up.

These are the people who took the bet that they could pull it off, and the overbet their hand. There are some people that have a poker face, and there are some that don’t. There are some that know how much they can bet, there are others that are clueless. I’d like more people in the world to pay attention to what they can realistically bet. It’ll affect my life considerably less.

Perhaps Budweiser said it best. “Know when to say When.”

More people need to apply this to life beyond a beer can.

 

[OZZYGT]

You’ve built things before. Like a dog house, or a tree fort, or a shed. Do you think you’ve got enough knowledge to build a 30,000 sf
office building? That’s not feigning competence, that’s stupidity. You were the lead carpenter on a custom home construction crew for 2 years. Could you build a 30,000 sf ? That’s feigning competence, because they think you can and you’ve got the chance to make them think you can.

I can

Nahh just kidding, but it's true what you say though, sometimes I just want to tell my classmates the same exact thing. They have worked for a construction company for a couple of years and then they come to school at the age of 47 years old taking courses like math 001 (which is a non credit class) and yet, they decide to TRY to correct the teacher (who's a professional engineer) and act like he's wrong when he tells them otherwise.

Feigning Competence is a necessary evil in this world. You need it to get ahead, they need it to expand their business. After all, if they’ve never done that before, they have to make the client think they have the ability to do that. It works at every rung. You’ve never swung a hammer, but you’ve labored on enough job sites to know how it goes together. They’ve never done brain surgery, but they’ve done enough research that someone thinks they can.

I think NYC has to be the headquarters of "feigning competence", there's so much bs'ed people who go beyond lying about stuff on their resume and when they get the job, they expect everyone to teach them how to perform their job. Though I'm not saying that you shouldn't have any competitive spirit when it comes to getting a job, I'm really annoyed when I see people exaggerate.

In the project that I’m dealing with right now, there is a leasing department. They’re trying to lease space in the building I’m building. They keep making changes to the plans and layouts while I’m trying to build this.

Didn't they reach an agreement with the architect? I mean, I know that the plans always get changed here and there when the construction starts, but like that? They are seriously wasting time and money. I hope your not on a lump sum type of contract

As I struggle through it, the designer is moving doors and windows, and spaces. She is concentrating on what the appearance of the building is. I’m trying to finish all the underground utilities and she won’t stop making changes. If she moves a wall, it affects where my plumbing and my electrical is. This means my inspections have to be redone, and my concrete slab gets delayed. I also have submittals on doors and windows that have to be redone. I once had a boss that loved the saying “Arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.” It basically means you’re worrying about something insignificant, and there is something more serious that you should be paying attention to.

Ouch, that's gotta be a pain in the exhaust pipe.

Some great points made here DA, one of the best "vexations" so far 👍 +rep to you (not that you need them).







Ciao!

 

[Duke]

There are myriad others that are in the same boat. You’ve seen them at the McDonalds window drive through. You’ve seen them behind the counter at the bank. You’ve seen them in business meetings. No, I won’t use GWB as an example.

I guess it says something about my career that I scratched my head and said "What does gypsum wallboard have to do with this?" when I first read that...

 

[Danny]

Martial Arts films obtain my goat. Some are soo poorly done it's unbelievable. Aside from the often dodgy lip synchronising, WHY THE HELL DO THE 3 BAD GUYS TAKE IT IN TURN TO ATTACK THE HERO/HEROINE?

Just beat them down together, or better still use a gun.
Also, what's with all the noble suicides? You could prove you were a skilled ninja/samurai/unassuming chinese market worker by completing the mission and not dieing. Seriously, just do it.

But y'know, whatever.

 

[Der Alta]

The 4 Day weekend and the real work week.

It’s Thanksgiving. Almost everyone I know in the office world has a 4 day weekend. Including my project managers, bosses, and, in general, the whole office. Except for the guys doing the real work. I’m scheduled to work this weekend. My framers, my masons, my plumbers, they’re all working. Friday and Saturday.

My Rant comes from the disproportionate work hours that most people have. It is an aspect of the new generation of work force that accepts it as our new dogma. You work. A lot.

A prime example would this situation would be my previous Project manager. She never got to the office before 10am. She always claimed to work late, but I could never reach her after 4pm. Office, Cell, or even at home. She had an agreement with the owner that her arrival time in the morning was 10am. No real gripe there, she just happened to get the sweet deal. Reference my previous rant, feigned competence. However, here is where my real rant comes from. While she arrived promptly at 10am, she would spend between an hour and two, sifting through and answering her emails. Taking no calls while doing this. She would also check the news and plan her lunch hour. Yes, hour. Noon she’d take off until 1pm. At that point she’d start taking calls from people.

Now this may be fine for her, but I’ve been at work since 6am and have a list of questions as long as my arm. I’ve already been at work for 7 hours before she’d even consider discussions. This is the basis of this rant.

The office people whom make “The Real Decisions” don’t get involved in the workload until significantly beyond when the rest of us start work. I arrive at the site at 6:30. I’ve been calling people on the way to work. My phone begins to ring at 6am. My PM’s don’t take calls until 10am. Banks don’t open until 9am. Most stores don’t open until 10am. I’m full well halfway through my 8 hour day before most people begin to function for the day. I’m well beyond my 8 hour day when most others are prepping to go home.

Now let us take this to the next level. Holiday weekends.

Banks close early. Stores close early. People go home early. After Noon, you may as well call it a day, because nothing else is open, and everyone is running for the hills. I’m on a tight construction schedule, so I’m still at work. I’m annoyed that the rest of the world operates on a different schedule than I. The banks operate on a fictitious schedule, stores do the same. Post office? Yeah, I can’t remember when the last time I was in one. I buy my stamps at the ATM, purchase envelopes from the grocery store and drop my mail in the big blue boxes.

On line banking? Yep, have to. Pay 50% of my bills online, because the rest of the places haven’t caught up to the 21st century. Right here, right now. It’s a matter of the business world not keeping up with the rest of us.

And I’m right bent about it.

 

[Keef]

I'll expect Duke to post his could-be vexs, but for now I'll share mine.

Striking teachers. Not hot teachers, but teachers who go on strike because of bad wroking conditions, etc. Do they not realize that they're putting hundreds of kids' educations in jeopardy? They may be ruining the kids' futures. But they don't get paid enough to be bothered.

What to do about these teachers. The government won't provide any more money to fix the holes in the roof, you can't fire the teachers because they have to teach, and they can't go on strike because, well, they have to teach. You can't move the kids because they need to learn and the school down the road is already overcrowded. You can't build a new school because there isn't enough money, obviously. You can't kill everyone and end the problem because that's highly illegal and besides, everyone is related to everyone else somehow so every person on the planet would be affected. I guess some people are just meant to be crappy.

Damn.

 

[ExigeEvan]

And following on from that...

People striking, not because a few people might get fired, but because they all might get fired.

How does this help the situation? A factory near me, Visteon, creates axels and such for the Ford group. But business is slow and Ford is struggling. They're considering selling the plant but if that doesn't go through the plant will be redundant and so will the workers.

And the worker's response to this? Going on strike. Exactly what any future owners don't want to see, a strike happy workforce.

 

[Keef]

And on from that...

There's a big steel plant south of my town, in Middletown, OH. AK Steel is its name. It's going through a very tough time financially, as are many steel companies and industrial companies in general in America. The skilled workers' wages have been cut. They were unhappy, so they went on strike, and now the plant isn't making any steel and is going out of business. What a solution, eh? I wish them good luck finding a job at another steel plant like that around here...

 

[Gil]

I have been away for a while but I have some newer, bigger vexations.

Jerks:
At least I assume they are jerks. Either that or they are illiterate, and can't figure out symbols, yet have managed to get driver's licenses.
Hint: a sign that says "Left Lane ends 1 mile ahead" accompanied by a flashing arrow pointing to the right mean "get your dumb ass over!" You can wait in line just like the res of us. cutting in at the front interrupts the "flow" slowing everyone behind you down. (where are those xXx rockets in the headlights when you need them?)

Working as a leadership figure, with the former leadership figure. I swear, if I hear "when I was in charge, this is how I handled that situation" one more time, all the guns on the planet will have to be hidden.
If you were up to the job, you'd still have the job.