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DJ: "Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate
Match'?"
Contestant: (laughing) "Yes I have."
DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to
Orlando,Florida if you win. What is your name? First only
please."
Contestant: "Brian."
DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"
Brian: "Yes."
DJ: "Yes? Does that mean you're married or you're what?"
Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."
DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only
please."
Brian: "Sara."
DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"
Brian: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"
Brian: (laughing) Yes, she's at work."
DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"
Brian: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Brian! Stay with me here!"
Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."
DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"
Brian: "About 10 minutes."
DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have
said that if a trip wasn't at stake."
Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."
DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock
this morning?"
Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."
DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"
Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her Mom is staying
for a couple of weeks..."
DJ: "Uh huh..."
Brian: "...and the Mother-in-law was in the shower at the Time."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
Brian: "On the kitchen table."
DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous
hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on
hold, get his wife's work number and call her up. You listen to
this. (3 minutes of commercials follow.)
DJ: "Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?" (touchtones
ringing)
Clerk: "Kinkos."
DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"
Clerk: "This is she."
DJ: "Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are live on the air
right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours
now."
Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"
DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows
not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo...do you
know the rules of 'Mate match'?"
Sarah: "No."
DJ: "Good!"
Brian: (laughing)
Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"
Brian (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be
completely honest."
DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions,
Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of
you will be off to Orlando, Florida for 5 days on us. Disney
World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal.
Get it Sarah?"
Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"
Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to
work."
DJ: "What time?"
Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."
DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"
Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."
DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to
protect his manhood. We've got one last question,
Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to Florida. Are you
ready?"
Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "Where did you have it?"
Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?"
Brian: "Just tell him, honey."
DJ: "What is bothering you so much,Sarah?"
Sarah: "Well, it's just that my Mom is vacationing with us
and..."
DJ: "She saw?"
Sarah: "BRIAN?!"
Brian: "No, no I didn't..."
DJ: "Ease up there, sister. Just messing' with your head. Your
answer, please?"
Sara: "Dear Lord...I cannot believe you told them this."
Brian: "Come on, honey, it's for a free trip to Florida."
DJ: "Let's go, sister. We ain't got all day here. Where did you
do it?"
Sarah: (short pause) "In the ass."
(long, long pause)
DJ: "We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors."
Match'?"
Contestant: (laughing) "Yes I have."
DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to
Orlando,Florida if you win. What is your name? First only
please."
Contestant: "Brian."
DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"
Brian: "Yes."
DJ: "Yes? Does that mean you're married or you're what?"
Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."
DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only
please."
Brian: "Sara."
DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"
Brian: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"
Brian: (laughing) Yes, she's at work."
DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"
Brian: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Brian! Stay with me here!"
Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."
DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"
Brian: "About 10 minutes."
DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have
said that if a trip wasn't at stake."
Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."
DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock
this morning?"
Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."
DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"
Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her Mom is staying
for a couple of weeks..."
DJ: "Uh huh..."
Brian: "...and the Mother-in-law was in the shower at the Time."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
Brian: "On the kitchen table."
DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous
hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on
hold, get his wife's work number and call her up. You listen to
this. (3 minutes of commercials follow.)
DJ: "Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?" (touchtones
ringing)
Clerk: "Kinkos."
DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"
Clerk: "This is she."
DJ: "Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are live on the air
right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours
now."
Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"
DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows
not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo...do you
know the rules of 'Mate match'?"
Sarah: "No."
DJ: "Good!"
Brian: (laughing)
Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"
Brian (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be
completely honest."
DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions,
Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of
you will be off to Orlando, Florida for 5 days on us. Disney
World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal.
Get it Sarah?"
Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"
Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to
work."
DJ: "What time?"
Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."
DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"
Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."
DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to
protect his manhood. We've got one last question,
Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to Florida. Are you
ready?"
Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "Where did you have it?"
Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?"
Brian: "Just tell him, honey."
DJ: "What is bothering you so much,Sarah?"
Sarah: "Well, it's just that my Mom is vacationing with us
and..."
DJ: "She saw?"
Sarah: "BRIAN?!"
Brian: "No, no I didn't..."
DJ: "Ease up there, sister. Just messing' with your head. Your
answer, please?"
Sara: "Dear Lord...I cannot believe you told them this."
Brian: "Come on, honey, it's for a free trip to Florida."
DJ: "Let's go, sister. We ain't got all day here. Where did you
do it?"
Sarah: (short pause) "In the ass."
(long, long pause)
DJ: "We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors."
True story Rossell?
