The December from hell...

danoff+1, daan+1

I'm having a little trouble understanding the problem.

You are staying with a friend. You are not paying rent, mooching food off the guy and feeling bad for it.

Okay.

So this friend will not permit you to use his address so you can get a job and therefore have some money to pay for your own grub (and maybe kick a few bucks in every month for rent)? Even if he were not interested in letting you sleep on his floor long term, why would he refuse to let you use his address? At the very least it would help you get a job and eventually your own place!

And what legal issue is preventing you from getting a job at a supermarket?? Do you have a warrant out for your arrest? Short of being a wanted felon, there's not much that can legally stop you from applying for a job.

You didn't ask for advice, but I think you need some.

1) Sell both the WRX and MR-2 and buy something that runs. Anything. Let me suggest something that will not remotely tempt you into tracking it, like an '84 Volvo 240GL. A beige one.

2) Get the job at the supermarket. Or McDonald's. Or wherever someone will pay you. If they want a physical address, give them your friend's address.

3) When they hand you a paycheck, go to the issuing bank and cash it. You do NOT need a checking account to cash a check from the bank that issues the check. You walk in, endorse the paycheck, then collect your money.

4) Go to the supermarket, buy a bunch of groceries and stock your friend's fridge as a way of thanking him for taking you in.

5) Rinse and repeat; until you can get your own place and put together a plan for the rest of your life.


M
 
I agree with both Daan and M-Spec on the matter. You can pull through this tough time with a little persistance and hard work! Good Luck! :)
 
Now, while I'm in no position to be judging you here, I have to throw in my .02.

so goes and sells a camera and buys an MR2 (even though you own an Impreza) and takes it on a track day and breaks it.

I was thinking the exact same thing. Who in their right mind would go and buy an MR2, just to take it out and go screw it up on the track in a situation like yours? In the time you spent on the track and on here replying, you could have been out looking for a job. And I also want to know how you got into the track without paying a decent fee.

Look, you sound like after all you've been through you still need a good swift kick in the ass. You don't sound like you're actually interested in helping yourself - you sound far more interested in having other people take care of you. Jobs are easy to get, get one. Take the money and get a place to stay and some necessities so that you don't lose the only friend you have left. Then shop around for a better job. Eventually you might have enough money to start taking classes again - this time don't skip them all the time and get kicked out.

Couldn't have said it better myself. You should really set your priorities straight, Takumi. Like the aforementioned MR2 incident, you don't sound like you really give a damn about your current situation, and you just want to make yourself think you do. I don't want to make you feel worse, or make you feel like an ass, but like danoff said, it sounds like you need a good swift one.
 
Actually, the MR2 didn't break on the track. It broke driving around a few days later.

The WRX isn't mine anymore, it was cosigned by the folks and they took it, as I couldn't make the payments on my own.

Using my friend's address to get work is probably what I'll do, and the supermarket is my only real option, as it's pretty much the only thing in walking distance.

Problem with selling the MR2 is that it's not worth much with a blown motor, and I haven't got the pink slip. I got it with the registration and bill of sale, and needed to smog it before getting official registration, and it broke before I could smog it.

I'm trying to work up to getting my stuff done, there's one major thing giving me trouble, which I didn't want to mention, but might as well, which is the fact that I'm supposed to be on meds, which I haven't been able to get since the whole incident. I have severe clinical depression, and, thanks to this whole issue, don't have money for meds. When my folks had me committed, they prescribed Prozac, and it was working decently, but as soon as I was out, I had no way to get it.

I also have trouble because I'm reliant on painkillers some of the time (note, not addicted, I'd never take anything that strong, I just normally pop a pair ot tylenol or aspirin every few hours), as I was badly injured when I got nailed by a car a couple years back, so for the past eight years or so I've been sorta like my entire body is covered in permanent bruises. It's awful, because on top of actual injuries, I sufferred a bit of damage to the part of my brain that controls pain sensitivity, causing constant pain even in parts unaffected by the actual accident. Some of it was pretty cool, though, I've got badass scars on my face, and I get to retell the tale of how I died on the ground for a couple minutes, and then just opened my eyes and stood up! (respawned?)

Additional injuries later on made things even worse (right leg and left arm were somewhat fractured, in a high-speed racing crash, and I never bothered to go to a doctor), and I've had other injuries in fights, etc. (Haha, my old man broke my foot by stomping on it once when I was slow getting out of bed...) It's bad enough that I'll come pretty close to fainting for a few minutes at a time, getting really dizzy and with dimming vision.

So, in large part, my lack of action is due to this. I hate to talk about it, because it just makes it sound like I'm making excuses, but it really sucks, and it's pretty demotivating. I try to ignore problems like this out of a "men should be tough, don't give in to pain, etc" mentality, but it gets overwhelming at times. I've even lost a job over it, the boss caught me standing staring into space when I was supposed to be mopping the floor, and I guess thought I was high or something, when I was trying not to pass out.

It's actually a bit part of why I drive. It seems like, when I'm behind the wheel, on an open road, that the pain goes away. It's possible, I suppose, that the intense concentration closes out the negative stuff. The adrenaline helps, too. The pain even helps my driving somewhat, as it gives me hyper-sensitivity to the feedback of the car, strangely enough. It's why I'm so stupid at times, though, why I'll waste so much money and time on my cars and driving, it's the only escape I have...
 
So work for a different escape. If you feel you have to constantly take some kind of pill-- any kind of pill-- you have an addiction. Stop it, because you'll eventually build up tolerance and heavy dosage of ibuprofen or acetaminophen (paracetamol, brits) will eventually mess with your kidneys/liver.

Just take the supermarket job. Try and bum the food that would otherwise be thrown out. I don't buy the meds/depression story. I think you're depressed because you're depressed. Get yourself going and you won't need any bs medication. Get your priorities straight as well. If your photography is not making you money, you'd better start generating funds from it or kick the hobby all together.
 
My photography stuff is all gone.

As for depression, while real depression is a factor, I've been confirmed to be clinically depressed by several doctors and shrinks, and both my father and his mother suffer from it, as well, so I've got the family history for it.
 
I've taken a million different things. Celexa and Lexapro are the ones I remember offhand, but they recently had me on Prozac, which seemed to work decently without causing any unusual behavior or side effects. Not on anything now, or for the last month, though.
 
TF
I hate to talk about it, because it just makes it sound like I'm making excuses

You don’t like making excuses? Let’s recap shall we?

TF
I wasn't doing well in college, and ended up getting the boot for missing classes.

TF
My folks threw me out. They got a restraining order.

TF
They cancelled my bank account … and killed off my credit card.

TF
…everything that wasn't bolted down was stolen.

TF
…I can't afford to keep the Subaru, which, on top of everything, has a busted wheel bearing and therefore isn't drivable. Had fun at the track… Therefore, I've now got nothing to drive.

TF
Yep, I'm pretty much homeless now.
TF
I'm completely out of money,
TF
Can't even get work, because I've got no bank to deposit the money in,
TF
my driver's license is damaged, can't get that replaced either, thanks again to the lack of an address and lack of funds.
TF
Nobody's gonna hire me without an address, either.

TF
My family... threw me away, like so much trash. They told me they didn't care if I die on the street

TF
As for the car... with a blown motor, it's not worth anything. Better to work up some money and fix it. The problem with unemployment, etc, is that I don't have enough of a job history to get it, and it's become quite difficult under our current administration...

Bush is a great scapegoat isn’t he?

TF
I can get one easily working at my friend's supermarket, it's just legal issues holding me up.

TF
Anyway, getting into another school is out of the question. I don't have the grades or the SAT scores to get into a "real" college, nor do I have the money to pay for one.

TF
The WRX isn't mine anymore, it was cosigned by the folks and they took it, as I couldn't make the payments on my own.

TF
Problem with selling the MR2 is that it's not worth much with a blown motor, and I haven't got the pink slip. I got it with the registration and bill of sale, and needed to smog it before getting official registration, and it broke before I could smog it.

TF
…I'm supposed to be on meds, which I haven't been able to get since the whole incident. I have severe clinical depression, and, thanks to this whole issue, don't have money for meds.

TF
I also have trouble because I'm reliant on painkillers some of the time

TF
I was badly injured when I got nailed by a car a couple years back, so for the past eight years or so I've been sorta like my entire body is covered in permanent bruises.

TF
I sufferred a bit of damage to the part of my brain that controls pain sensitivity, causing constant pain even in parts unaffected by the actual accident.

TF
Additional injuries later on made things even worse (right leg and left arm were somewhat fractured, in a high-speed racing crash, and I never bothered to go to a doctor),

TF
…my old man broke my foot by stomping on it once when I was slow getting out of bed

TF
I've even lost a job over it, the boss caught me standing staring into space when I was supposed to be mopping the floor, and I guess thought I was high or something, when I was trying not to pass out.

TF
It's actually a bit part of why I drive. It seems like, when I'm behind the wheel, on an open road, that the pain goes away.

^^That’s an excuse to go to the track.

TF
I've been confirmed to be clinically depressed by several doctors and shrinks, and both my father and his mother suffer from it, as well, so I've got the family history for it.

Ok so here’s what we’ve got:
  • Abusive Parents
  • Neglectful Parents
  • Theft
  • Brain Damage
  • Pain medication addiction
  • Dependence on anti-depression drugs
  • Depression
  • Poor work history due to the above
  • No money
  • No address
  • No job
  • Car taken
  • Car broken
  • Low SAT scores
  • Bush’s domestic policy
  • Homeless
  • No driver’s license
  • Kicked out of college

How many problems does a guy have to have before he gets some sympathy around here?

At what point in that whole story were you pro-active? At what point did you actually try to take control of your life and head it in a responsible direction? When you were skipping class? When you were taking your new car to the track? How about when you were refusing to go to the doctor after getting into a street racing wreck? What about when you were studying for the SATs, or when you were getting fired for uncontrollable pain while mopping (I don’t buy that that was the only reason you got fired). Hell, even after telling us your life's story you didn't ask any of us for advice on where to go or what to do next. Where is the "how can I help myself out of this mess" question?

You started this thread on the basis that you’re “stuck” because you don’t have an address… as though once one loses a mailbox one can no longer make something of themselves. I think that’s a comforting thought for you because it would mean that you were no longer responsible for helping yourself.

My suggestion is this - take control of your own life.

You seem like you’re young and capable, get a job in construction. If one job isn’t enough, you can work multiple jobs. I know that’ll keep you from going to the racetrack and cut into your street racing time, but it’ll keep food in your stomach and a roof over your head.
 
And once you do, start attending a community college – you don’t need good SAT scores, just the ability to breathe.
 
My SAT score issue isn't that I didn't do well on them, it's that I never took them. I had a lot of trouble with my High School career and tested out to get my diploma when I was 16. Because of that, the SAT thing never happenned. I also don't have a record of grades.

I do, eventually, plan on going back into community college when I can. My major problem has been that I just haven't figured out what I want to do down the line. Every time I go into college, I end up discovering that I don't feel right with the field I'm studying and end up dropping out. The fields that I do think I'd do well in require a lot of schooling and time, and I'm not sure if I can do it, namely business, law, or medicine.

One thing I must say. I'm not, and never have been, a street racer. I think racing on the street is detestable and entirely irresponsible. The only place I've ever raced is on the track. Don't confuse my past as a canyon driver with street racing. In the canyons, I only sought to better myself as a driver, not to compete, and only ever practiced in the most isolated of locations. My wreck had nothing to do with racing and everything to do with solo stupidity.

I shouldn't have said "current administration" when referring to the welfare system, I suppose. "Current socio-economic climate" would have been better, possibly.

I'm working on getting work at the moment (no pun intended), as I've said. The biggest of my problems right now revolves around my lack of a functional car, as it greatly limits my options for employment. If that weren't an issue, I'd be happy to, say, wait tables in a decent restaurant. I'm actually quite good with customer service/intrapersonal jobs, it's the manual labor stuff that just drives me out of my mind. I expect someone will tell me to suck it up and take one, and I'll probably have to, but I just can't hang onto that kind of work for very long, I just go nuts when I'm stuck as an "invisible" worker, with no interaction with the customer. I could care less, at the moment, about building my car or continuing with my racing "career", that should be understood. Right now... all I want money for, aside from life's necessities, is to be able to go on a date now and then.
 
My SAT score issue isn't that I didn't do well on them, it's that I never took them. I had a lot of trouble with my High School career and tested out to get my diploma when I was 16. Because of that, the SAT thing never happenned.
It doesn't matter, they will still accept you.


Ciao!
 
Hold up. You say you randomly pass out right? What the hell are you doing behind a steering wheel if thats the case. You are a danger to other road users and pedestrians.

The fields that I do think I'd do well in require a lot of schooling and time, and I'm not sure if I can do it, namely business, law, or medicine.

You remind me of the type who wants things, but without having to put in the hard work.

Learn how to walk before you start to run. Get a job in a company where there are career oppurtunities and you can work your way up. Then once you have a secure job you can concentrate on getting extra qualifications relevant to the industry your in to further your career. Such subjects as law and medicine I dont think you would be able to manage. They are both hardcore subjects that will require you to be on top of things 24/7 and they are extremly time consuming. If you had a GF who was willing to support it, then maybe you could manage, but would you be able to see it through, as im sure your GF would be pissed if you quit after a year.

You say you like interacting with customers, how about getting a job with a telecomunications company as a engineer? They could train you up, and you could earn money whilst your learning. I would also suggest being a electrician but that might be a little too high risk due to your fainting/passing out.
 
One thing I must say. I'm not, and never have been, a street racer. I think racing on the street is detestable and entirely irresponsible. The only place I've ever raced is on the track. Don't confuse my past as a canyon driver with street racing. In the canyons, I only sought to better myself as a driver, not to compete, and only ever practiced in the most isolated of locations. My wreck had nothing to do with racing and everything to do with solo stupidity.

So 1 idiot doing twice the speed limit in a public area is somehow indefinitely better than 2 idiots doing twice the speed limit in a public area? Technically, maybe. Morally, no.
 
I don't literally faint or pass out, I just get dizzy or lightheaded if I'm on my feet for long periods. I'm fine with a car because I'm sitting down when I drive. I think it's probably a result of blocking out pain from my bad leg, and finally it hits me, or something.

MachOne, there's a major fundamental difference between us and street racers. We seek out the most isolated, un-travelled, areas possible. Our favourite roads start in the middle of nowhere and dead-end, so we can be sure there'll be no oncoming traffic once we check out the road and see that nobody's at the end or along the road. Also, unlike street racers, if we see any potential for danger to a non-involved party, we'll stop and wait until said issues are gone.
 
MachOne, there's a major fundamental difference between us and street racers. We seek out the most isolated, un-travelled, areas possible. Our favourite roads start in the middle of nowhere and dead-end, so we can be sure there'll be no oncoming traffic once we check out the road and see that nobody's at the end or along the road. Also, unlike street racers, if we see any potential for danger to a non-involved party, we'll stop and wait until said issues are gone.
That is no excuse at all, your still racing on streets even if it is just to better yourself. I know a guy who ran a woman over speeding along a supposedly safe street, it was out in the country, and it was highly unlikely that someone should be out there, but he didn't see her, and wham. Killed her unborn baby in the process. You can argue about how your so different to a street racer, but at the end of the day your still using public roads as your playground, and when the unexpected happens, which can happen at any time, you could well end up ruining someone elses life. And to argue against the unexpected happening would be both stupid and selfish.
 
That is no excuse at all, your still racing on streets even if it is just to better yourself. I know a guy who ran a woman over speeding along a supposedly safe street, it was out in the country, and it was highly unlikely that someone should be out there, but he didn't see her, and wham. Killed her unborn baby in the process. You can argue about how your so different to a street racer, but at the end of the day your still using public roads as your playground, and when the unexpected happens, which can happen at any time, you could well end up ruining someone elses life. And to argue against the unexpected happening would be both stupid and selfish.

Well, I already stated that canyon driving was my past, not my current. When I go up now, I just go to enjoy a drive in the mountains, in places like Angeles Crest Highway, where the 55mph limit means that I can enjoy myself without breaking any laws. (55 is a decent clip, not "fast" by any means, but still fun, for the MR2. The limit is so high because the area's heavily patronized by the sportbike community, and I suppose the state wanted to make a small concession to them, giving them a place where they could ride at a fun speed and remain within the law.)

I've been thinking about this a bit, however, and I think I'll have to give a bit of a history breakdown of how things work up in our canyon.

I frequent a well-known mountain in SoCal. It's been the subject of quite a few magazine articles and TV segments. If you're active in the drift or canyon community, chances are you've heard of it. Three roads diverge from a central hub and meeting spot, each with very different characteristics. One was short, moderate speed, and had the benefit of being very well-maintained and being the most isolated, as well as being the most defenitely uphill-downhill. It's the main road for runs, most being uphill, due to the fact that downhill traffic is controlled, as it can only come from the central hub. The second is the longest, with a more high-speed flavor, and less uphill-downhill, with the start and finish being at about the same elevation. The final road decended to the nearest town, and was notable for having a section comprized of sharp hairpin corners, connected by fast sweepers. This final road is currently closed, due to a landslide two winters ago, but is due to be reopened soon. What is especially notable about these three roads, however, is that they're isolated, rarely travelled, have excellent visibility to the corners ahead, and, most importantly, have no official speed limits. Driving began there decades ago, but the current situation started about ten years ago...

The longest-term of our drivers started running our complex of roads in the early 1990s. Most prominent was "Jetta", known for his succession of VWs. At one point, he was known as the most skilled of the drivers in the area. He's no longer part of our group, as he's now a professional rally driver, campaigning an '02 WRX in USRC and CRS. One of his early contemporaries was "bearslayer", an Siroccio driver who specialized in one of the roads in the complex, the longer, more varied course. Eventually, he switched to an E36 M3, and gained his nickname when he had an "encounter" with a bear at about 60MPH. He's repaired the BMW since then, and is still active in the community. He's probably the de-facto "leader" of the old-school group.

There are many other notable drivers from those days, but some are far more active than others. Work and family have pulled many away. Quite a few have become professional drivers, as well, with a decent roster of mid-high level Formula Drift competitors and at least one Honda Cup champion (rumored to have done the fastest uphill run of all time!).

It was four years ago that I entered the scene. A young driver with a mostly stock 240SX and little skill, the only thing that characterized me was determination and the willingness to give all I had to become better. It was at this time that I started to get to know many of the original group of drivers. At that time, the community was quite small, rumors (purposely generated by the core group, I might add) of police and road damage having recently driven away an influx of ricers. What seperated me, I suppose, from those drivers, was the fact that I was serious about driving technique, and that I quickly adopted the philosophy of the leading drivers, which leads to the next section...

The old school philosophy. This is why I'm retelling this story, in part. We had many rules, written and unwritten, that made us unique. Most prominent was simply our attitude. We always made it known that we were there to have fun, to trade knowledge and connections, and just to hang out between drives. We frowned on serious racing at that time, refused to associate with anyone who would try to race for money or property. We also steadfastly opposed use of drugs and alcohol on our mountain, except in cases where they were obviously only being consumed by those who were not driving for a long period of time. (I.E. spectators) Safety was priority one. We wouldn't go on runs with reckless drivers or those with cars that could pose a hazard to the rest of the group.

We always stressed that pushing beyond one's limits was taboo, and that, if it posed a risk to the general population, it was not to be performed on our roads. We kept track of what drivers were where, and nobody would go on a road until a driver had returned, unless they'd stated they were going home, or it had been long enough that we had to check for a possible crash. In many ways, we ran things like a trackday, with our stress on safety and order. We're still proud, to this day, that in the many years of driving up there, the only injury on record was a drunk driver who wasn't associated with us.

In those days, our cars helped keep us out of trouble, too. We were mostly composed of 240SXs, AE86s, and other older, slower, cars, like classic VWs and EG Civics. A WRX or S2000 appearing was like seeing a Ferrari to us.

However, things took a rapid change, about two years ago. Nobody is really sure why. We had a sudden influx of new drivers, from varying backgrounds and locations, but with a few common points. First, they were all young, few above 20. Secondly, they all drove "fast" cars. S2000, Evo, STi, 350Z, Porsche, they all become common. Third, they became known for their use of R-compound tyres. Finally, they were competitive, with a street racing mentality and a willingness to race at 100% on those public roads. Quickly, the old, grassroots, group, lost dominance, due to their more conservative, mature, attitude, and their lack of willingness to risk as much as the newer drivers.

It was at this time that the modern climate truly began. The influx of new drivers, with new attitudes, changed the face of our world. These drivers began to splinter into many factions. One of these factions quickly became the lords of the mountain...

It was a group with no "official" name, but informally called "red team", as most of the leading cars were painted in that color. They were composed of two groups of cars. First were the "Japanese supercars", with the Evolution being the most prominent, as many as six being in the lead positions of the group at one given time. Also prominent in this group were the S2K and the Porsche 911 and Boxter. The second half of this team, no less dominant, but with a different style, were the "race cars". The Civic and the Miata were prime in this group. They were notable for their use of racing tires, rollcages, suspensions in the tens of thousands of dollars, and use of functional aerodynamics. Most were fitted with turbo kits of one form or another, although there was at least one extremely fast N/A Civic with a Spoon-built motor.

Other groups appeared, as well. Teams composed of one-make cars were common. Prime among these were Evolution, Impreza, and 240SX groups. Another prominent group was the "Drifters", a team composed mostly of 240s, but all with a backround in track and street drifting. Most of these teams, however, were lead by drivers in the top-class, but their junior members were mostly beginners. Therefore, they never achieved the dominance of "red team".

When these drivers first entered the scene, they were sociable, and seemed like a good part of the community. However, as their dominance grew, they became insular and arrogant. The camradarie we had once taken for granted was shatterred. The roads quickly became a battleground. The prime method of warfare? The Time Attack.

It was about this time that my story, as well, truly began. In June of 2005, I bought my WRX. Suddenly, I had a machine that could compete. It was powerful, fast, and agile, yet stable and controllable. By the end of summer, I'd reached the top ten percent of the T/A rankings. Several teams attempted to recruit me, but I felt that I wanted nothing to do with their level of arrogance, and decided to remain a lone, although not unsociable, driver. Through the winter off-season, I practiced, and upgraded my car. When the spring of 2006 came, I found myself in the top ten overall drivers, and the only driver on such a level who still ran street tires. Dedication and experience paid off well.

The next chapter introduced what we jokingly called "Team NinjaZ". The name was a complete joke, a spoof of the well known "Touge Pirates". The "NinjaZ" were actually a varied group of cars and drivers, united toward one common goal. They didn't at all seek to be the best or the fastest, but instead to revitalize the old ways and old spirit, in a generation of newer drivers. The team actually came out of a conversation we all had late one night, and suddenly the team came to exist, with myself rapidly ending up in the leader's position. (Which I never asked for, but was happy to take!). Our small group of about ten cars rapidly started growing. Our sociable attitude, our friendly spirit, and our welcoming of less experienced drivers, quickly became a major draw.

The team worked all too well, in fact. You see, around this time, the leading groups had gotten to the point where about three of them were holding the other nine spots of the top ten. Team Red dominated, with the "Evo Club" and the "Drifters" taking a few spots. These groups, however, had begun to fracture internally, as top-ranking drivers became disillusioned with the idea of playing second fiddle to the leaders, and soon all ten of the top drivers on the mountain led their own teams.

The "NinjaZ" came in when these teams started breaking up. It seemed a lot of the younger drivers, and some of the more experienced ones, had decided that they wanted no part of the arrogant attitudes of their former teams, and came under our banner. Many of the old-school drivers, who had entered a stage of semi-retirement, allied themselves with us, as well. Those drivers, however, were a bit more difficult to convince. In many cases, it wasn't until I had other drivers ride with me, or drive in a group with me, than they were convinced that our team was skilled enough to be associated with.

Eventually, however, even our group reached its end. Unlike the other groups, though, we had a happy ending. Simply, our "team" composed such a large portion of the driving population that there was no sense in keeping it as a team, but rather letting it become the mass of the driver group itself. The summer of this year was the climax of my mountain career.

With the mountain filled to the bursting point with drivers and competing teams, it was ready to explode. And it finally did as the season really gained speed. As if out of nowhere, a reformed group of the original drivers returned, many in new machines, and suddenly the scene had had enough. Full-scale warfare erupted on nearly every night, and the sides of the road were filled with spectators and supporters. The mountain had become a true championship. Suddenly, the old drivers embraced racing, albeit with very strict rules forbidding passing and other dangerous moves. Race after Race, night after night, the air in the once-quiet canyon was shatterred by the backfires of racing exhausts, the scream of slipping tires, and the high pitched wails of turbochargers and VTEC.

The old masters quickly showed their skill. They climbed to the top of the rankings, and suddenly, the old supporters of the formerly-dominant teams became fans of the original kings. Slowly but surely, the face of the mountain began to change. The old philosophies began to return, the old spirit and face of the mountain had started to show itself again.

Even I was drawn into the racing, determined to show my skill, and keep the respect of my comrades. Fortunately, I managed to do that decently well, and a new title started to be whispered through the masses... "Thunderbolt". I was told it came from the fact that I had a fast, but hard-hitting style, with a heavy, large, car, much like the WWII P-47 Fighter and modern A-10 attack aircraft of the same name. Somehow, whoever started the name spread it around, and I still get addressed as "Thunderbolt" when I'm at car-related events or in the canyons.

This world was simply not fit for the "teams" who had so recently dominated. Some of them embraced the old ideals. Others left, off to run other mountains, or just dissappeared from the scene altogether. Once again, the mountain had become what it should be.

The last chapter begins there. It was when this year and a half whirlwhind died down that the new face of the mountain began to show itself. We still had many young drivers, but they were in tune with the original spirit. The old-school drivers, too, still hung around, once again running on "their" mountain. Even some of the oldest faces showed occasionally, including those who had moved to pro racing.

Somewhere in there, I started to really get to know my predecessors. The real shock finally came one night, when hardly anyone but those who had started before the "war" were on the mountain. Hints had been given, but this was confirmation. I was finally told that I was part of the old-school group. I was given access to the private message board we use to communicate, started recieving calls about run nights and parties, and more. With that, I also recieved responsibilties...

I was, by far, the youngest driver in their group. It was made known to me that I was now responsible for the young, beginning drivers. To discourage them from inappropriate activity, to give them help in proper tuning technique, and to continue to spread the ideals of our mountain. I had proved myself in the time of conflict, and was chosen as a sort of emmisary to the newer drivers. I think the idea is that, due to their age and infamy, the newer drivers felt too intimidated by the older drivers who composed the core group, and I was drafted in because I had a rapport and a relationship with them, and had proven that I could be trusted, both to represent the core group and to take care of the younger drivers, and because I'd become well-known enough that I had the necessary reputation to make the newer drivers take notice.

And, so now, I've stepped back from the running, for the most part, as my superiors did. Now, I go up to give advice to new drivers, to ride with them and offer tuning and driving techniques, and to take them for rides to show them my style and lines. I've become somewhat of a driving instructor, with several main students whom I'm grooming to become the newest of the top class, much as I now realize my superiors did when I was a beginner.

My career as a competitive driver is over, but my time on the mountain is not. My four years have been the most amazing time of my life, with the greatest triumphs and tragedies I've ever faced, and has created an incredible story.

I've told you all this so that you understand what our world is like, and why I participate in it. I still stay there because the story still continues for the many competitiors on the mountain, and because I want to see where the coming chapters will take us all.
 
Your world as controled as it is, is still not immune to the unexpected, and as long it's being run on public roads that makes you personally responisble for when the unexpected happens. It doesn't matter what your attitude is towards safety, if it was that high you'd have all been meeting up on a track, and not public roads. It's good that you don't actually race anymore, but unless that's because you see how wrong and stupid it is then it's all rather moot arguing that you don't race anymore when someone else says how stupid it all is, and since your apparently grooming others to race these canyons then I guess it's quite obviously so. Besides all that, I don't see how any of this is going to help you in your current situation except make it worse, you wasting time, even spending money on petrol and whatever going out into the canyons, all the while you could be making money at work. If you were more sensible thinking your situation over you'd have got a job before christmas when there's a chance for you to earn a nice ammount of overtime, sometimes at 1.5 or 2 times the standard hourly rate which to be included in a first paycheque could have been hugely useful. You really do need to kick yourself into gear and start to think about the important things, and set your priorities.
 
Well, that's an obvious point, and I haven't been to the canyons since my whole thing started. The trackday was already planned and paid before my world went to hell.

As for grooming drivers... well, I feel that it's better if I help them learn good technique, at least it'll be good drivers racing instead of bad ones.
 
You must then live in some kind of Intial D wanabe fantasy world where punk kids think their your username. This is the real world, no matter how safe you are people are still going to get hurt. There is no gurantee of safty when racing on the street. Also no matter how talented your supposed group is your still streetracers, not a official sanctioned organization on a race track. If you want to improve your skills start autocrossing, or road racing.

I'll be honest with you. I fool around on public roads sometimes also. That is something I'm not proud to say, in fact I'm ashamed. I do it randomly with friends, in random places. It isn't something I want to do I just have an addiction and it is driving fast and pushing myself to the limits. I am very, very skilled, and talented, but even I have made mistakes and have had bad luck, which has resulted in a accident (no others involved thank god) and a lot of near misses. However, I also autocross almost every weekend and go to track days regularly. I can't help it if I want to have a little fun on country roads, but I know the counsequences and I do not try to justify it as being right by joining some little team and making excuses. I feel like a jerk for doing it at all and I hope as I age I become more mature and kick the habit.

If I was you I would do the same before someone you know gets hurt or worse, killed!
 
Well, I already stated that canyon driving was my past, not my current.

Taken from your profile:
TF's Profile
Interests:
Canyon driving, road racing, photography.

There, slap bang, first off, Canyon Driving. Sounds more like a current thing than a past thing, no?
 
..and humble.

Sure you can. It's called self-control.


Why thank you! :lol: Just trying to make a point. ( I'm not trying to say I'm the best driver in the world) :)

That has been a big problem of mine in every instance of my life, but I'm working on it. I'm very impulsive, impatient, and have friends (who are also involved in motorsports) that are a bad influence. But hey, this isn't a thread about how my thought process works and I assure you I'm not proud of these traits! :grumpy:
 
There's more between you and your parents. Ive never heard of parents kicking their own child out on the street and telling him to die after some bad grades, and especially after you tried to kill yourself. Are you on drugs? Or have you been stealing from them? Or are you just another ungrateful spoiled rich dick head? anyway, buck up champ. Life is a relentless kick in the ass. Just take this as an experience to make you a better person. One thing, it's always better to be this than one of those spoiled rich 16 year old girls on mtv.
 
MachOne, there's a major fundamental difference between us and street racers. We seek out the most isolated, un-travelled, areas possible. Our favourite roads start in the middle of nowhere and dead-end, so we can be sure there'll be no oncoming traffic once we check out the road and see that nobody's at the end or along the road. Also, unlike street racers, if we see any potential for danger to a non-involved party, we'll stop and wait until said issues are gone.

It doesn't matter how isolated it is, it is still a public road. Meaning other people do travel there.

That is no excuse at all, your still racing on streets even if it is just to better yourself. I know a guy who ran a woman over speeding along a supposedly safe street, it was out in the country, and it was highly unlikely that someone should be out there, but he didn't see her, and wham. Killed her unborn baby in the process. You can argue about how your so different to a street racer, but at the end of the day your still using public roads as your playground, and when the unexpected happens, which can happen at any time, you could well end up ruining someone elses life. And to argue against the unexpected happening would be both stupid and selfish.

+Rep

Don't worry about him, he's just another hot headed 14 year old. Or 13... or 12? Something like that.

Considering you're the same age :rolleyes:....
 
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