The Definition of...

[Venari]

How about some funny definitions, from experience.

For example:

Forgetfulness: Leaving your heavy duty plumbers pliers on top of the open hot-water tank cupboard door.

Luck: Closing a door while walking quickly enough so that a pair of heavy-duty plumbers pliers fall off the top of the door and do not hit you on the head/shoulder/foot.

Pain: Opening your Levi 501 button-fly jeans by grasping the beltline hard between your finger and thumb, and pulling hard... only then discovering you have trapped a pubic hair under your thumb as well.

 

[Danoff]

Coffee - A person who is coughed on.


(I stole that joke)

 

[buickgnx88]

Danoff - What Dan's girlfriend says every night before bed.

 

[Danoff]

Danoff - What Dan's girlfriend says every night before bed.

Good thing my name isn't jack.

 

[buickgnx88]

That would open up a whole 'nother can of worms now wouldn't it?

 

[Loon]

We got some new ones for the Epic thread.

 

[Sureboss]

Good thing my name isn't jack.

Or cut...

 

[wfooshee]

Creation:

*** no, I better not ***

 

[TopHat]

Insomnia- Oh boy! Roseanne is on at 4:30!

 

[buickgnx88]

Cheesing: Hallucinating on cat urine

 

[DQuaN]

Control:

Simon Cowell
Boris Johnston
David Cameron
etc
etc


(If anyone figures that out, i'm )


Platypus: to give your cat pigtails

Flemish: rather like snot

Celtic: a prison for fleas

 

[Touring Mars]

Patience: Explaining your problem for the 7th time to British Telecom
Frustration: Being told by the 7th BT person you've spoken to that they need to transfer your call to another section
Anger: Being transferred by BT person #8 back to the same section that BT person #7 was in
Rage: Being told by an automated BT service that your problem does not exist

Based on a true story

 

[Diego440]

Patience: Explaining your problem for the 7th time to British Telecom
Frustration: Being told by the 7th BT person you've spoken to that they need to transfer your call to another section
Anger: Being transferred by BT person #8 back to the same section that BT person #7 was in
Rage: Being told by an automated BT service that your problem does not exist

Based on a true story

You forgot

Solution: Dropping by British Telecom with an AK47 and some rounds and having your problem swiftly solved.


Ugly: Having an umbrella stuck up your bumhole
Horrible: Having said umbrella opened
Horrendous: Having said umbrella pulled out, while still opened.

 

[Touring Mars]

Solution: Dropping by British Telecom with an AK47 and some rounds and having your problem swiftly solved.

Don't think the thought hasn't crossed my mind...

 

[opendriver]

Poverty: Being involved in any type of racing