Who's your daddy?

  • Thread starter Thread starter milefile
  • 50 comments
  • 1,593 views
My whole family hates me as some of you know.Especially my dad.

I love them, they hate me.

My dad made extra sure he told me that tonight when he got home from work. He got through the door and I said "Hi", he looked at me and said "Why the Fcuk are you talking to me" and walked past me.

Nice guy huh. :(
 
My dad and I never got on all that well until he and my mum split up and he moved out. He was never mean to me, we just didn't seem to connect somehow. After that we had a couple of years where we built a good relationship, but since he met his second wife we just gradually saw less and less of each other. Now he lives far away and I barely see him. I miss him.

My mum and I have always been close though, and I get on really well with my stepdad.

Rumple: It sounds as though the best thing you could do is move out of there if you're old enough. It must be terrible to have the people who are supposed to be closest to you telling you that you're worthless.
 
Originally posted by ///M-Spec


Milefile; FWIW, I feel for you. I can't imagine a more terrible thing for a child to experience. It couldn not have been easy to bare your soul about it like that. Mom worked me over a few times when I was being a bratty kid (that's how they dealt with brats in the Old Country) and I can empathize.
Click to expand...

I was talking with my younger brother the other night and we were telling family stories. He told me about one time when he pushed my dad down, and how horrible he felt about it. I'm sure my dad somehow deserved it because, like I've already said, he's an asshole, and yet my brother still felt guilty. I understood where he was coming from because as I got older I stood up to my dad, and the first time I detected that he felt threatened by my defiance I felt guilty. It's a strange response to exerting one's power, and one I think abusers are counting on, whether they're aware of it or not.

If my mom had any idea how much I leave unsaid for her sake... I know I've mentioned this stuff to her before, and she has a very selective memory, actually accusing me of exaggerating and even fabricating. I guess I'm willing to overlook her denial due to the fact that it is one of her few faults, and she has really only hurt me, or anyone for that matter, indirectly and unintentionally.

I like reading about the good, fulfilling father/son relationships from all of you, though. I imagine maybe someday my son will be asked about it and I want him to be able to say some of the things you guys have said.
 
Well, I never had a Dad to raise me as he died before I was born.
So, consequently, I had to learn everything myself and am glad for that.
If I ever raise a Son to the world, it would be a great relationship in which we would be best friends for life and he would learn something from me. He in return would teach me a few things about youth, life and the intricacies of raising a child.
Milefile, sorry to hear of your abusive Father, too bad he was such a bad person.
I hope you have learned from that experience and don't do the same with your child.
Good luck man and congrats on having kids.
Misnblu
 
that'd be great misn but when the teens hit, you really cant tell whats gonna happen. some dont like to hang with thier parents as its not seen as cool. others come home from school to treat their parents like they treat their mates at school (which doesnt go down too well). far too many think it is tough and cool to tell their parent where to go in front of their friends. peer pressure can also wreak havok between parent and son.....
there are too many factors to say "we are going to have a perfect relationship".
drugs are also seen as cool, even tho you might say "only idiots do them"....

if you are lucky you have a reasonably good realationship tho.. but that takes alot of luck.

given a choice, i'd not have a child these days.
but rebecca is ok most of the time :)


(Other posts have been deleted as there were 4 of the same post-Misnblu)
 
Originally posted by milefile
I imagine maybe someday my son will be asked about it and I want him to be able to say some of the things you guys have said.
Click to expand...
He bloody well better when asked here at GTP in 2015 :D

And MF, I really am sorry. I can't even begin to imagine what life would've been without my dad. At least you got away sane and had the eye to see what went wrong and managed to steer away from the path of your fathers.....


Text removed for abusive language.-Misnblu
Slighty offensive text re-done in slighty less offensive manner.-Flerbizky
 
Ving, yeah you're right.
I've got a nephew that I have helped raise since birth.
He was my best little friend (excellent relationship) when he was young, but when he turned 12, it was like a light switch, from best friends to having nothing to do with you.
But you know, if you are there for them, even in those type of times, they will stick with you.
He is now 15 and is really interested in cars (thanks to me), girls of coarse and wants to be in my car club when he gets his license. Heh, I even taught him how to drive and a stick too. :lol:
Anyway, they do change but you must also.
Even though I don't have my own kids, helping raise my nephew has told me that I would be a great parent.
As strict as my Mother was when I was young, I vowed to learn from that and be better.
Too bad most don't learn that and do the same with their kids.
It's funny, most of us tell ourselves that we would never do the same to our kids that our parents did to us. Too bad it doesn't happen most of the time.
Misnblu
 
my ralationship with my dad is good i guess.. we are friends and such.. but he has a bad temper though. and we argues a lot. but he never hurts me. or, usualy. but he has hitted me some times. he always says that he is sorry, but i dont forget it. i forgive him in away, but im always gonna remember things he has done to be.. like once, he slapped me in my face, and threw his laptop in the floor. i got scared and runned up on my room, and locked it, but he kicked the door and ruined it. im never gonna forget that. but when he is not angry he is nice to me. he is mostly angry when he comes home from work, so then im usualy on my room...
 
My father is a complete asshole. I didn't fully realize it until earlier this evening when I read an e-mail he was typing to his ex-wife.

My dad and mom got back together not too long ago after a 5-6 year divorce. Everyday my mom accuses my dad of talking/e-mailing his second ex-wife, and he denies it. I heard him talking to her one day after we got out of a movie, and I saw an e-mail he just sent to her saying he'd meet her for lunch at the air force base, or at her condo. I want to tell my mom, but I don't know how. It would **** a lot of things up. She just moved here from OK, and if she left him she'd have nowhere to go for a while. I'm probably just going to go ballistic on my father one of these days, and damn near kill him.

**** it.
 
It's alright Josh, keep your cool.

If there's a sudden need for the truth to be said, then let the truth be said.

Don't blurt out anything without thinking of what could happen.
 
Originally posted by Super-Supra
It's alright Josh, keep your cool.

If there's a sudden need for the truth to be said, then let the truth be said.

Don't blurt out anything without thinking of what could happen.
Click to expand...


Meh, it's just hard. I love both of my parents, and I would hate to see them separate for a second time, but I can't stand seeing my mother beeing lied to - especially about something as serious as this.

I'll find the right time to tell her, eventually, and I'll be there to help support her in anyway possible.
 
Originally posted by milefile
My dad is a prick. He always has been. It hurts to say it, because I guess in some way I love him, although it's never benefited me to do so.
Click to expand...

But, dude, he has an Envoy. I think the guy rules and I've never even met him!
 
My dad has been a great father....he's the best...a real role model...and now he's a brilliant grand father to my kids...

he's honest, hard working, old fashioned (which is good in a father figure), strong and intellegent...

i couldnt ask for more....we were out for a beer on Friday evening together and we laughed and joked and talked about footy, work and the world etc etc.....

i woke up with a hang over on Sat. morning and that wasnt so good however...
 
Originally posted by TurboSmoke
My dad has been a great father....he's the best...a real role model...and now he's a brilliant grand father to my kids...

he's honest, hard working, old fashioned (which is good in a father figure), strong and intellegent...

i couldnt ask for more....we were out for a beer on Friday evening together and we laughed and joked and talked about footy, work and the world etc etc.....

i woke up with a hang over on Sat. morning and that wasnt so good however...
Click to expand...
That is good to hear.
This is something you never hear of anymore.
With the world of feel good, lust and lasciviousness, it can make a good, honest man turn the wrong way (In Josh's fathers case)
Josh, I hope for the best for you and hope the truth is finally out, for you and your Mom. These meetings of his are more than just meetings. :odd: :rolleyes:
TurboSmoke, kudo's to you and your Father. That's what I mean about being a Father to your son and his best friend too. Thats too cool.
Misnblu
 
I'm actually amazed my father is still alive. He's done every crazy thing in the book, done every illegal drug known to man, had six open-heart surgeries, and is still alive and kicking at age 62.

I have to admit, I don't have a close relationship with him because he's living in Romania right now. But we chit-chat though email, and occassionally a spark of brillance comes form him.

Lets just say if it weren't from him, I probably wouldn't have been interested much in automobiles in the first place.
 
I hear ya, though in a different way.

Mine left us when I was 5, for a rich woman. He's been a materialistic prick his whole life.

When he took us on Wednesday's, it was like it was a hassle for him.

He's also the type who has to look great in front of people. The only times I saw him during High School was when he showed up to a football game or wrestling match with a cooler full of "Sunny D",......

Now that the years have past, and he's had 3 more wives, I think he is comming to the realization of how he acctually treated us. In my early twenties, it was very hard for me to forgive him,... but, I'm slowely beginning too....
 
Let's see. Not enough time or room on here to write about my Dad. So to keep it short...He is on a very very short list of people I look up to, respect and admire.
 
my relationship with my dad was fairly great, till I tried to make some decisions that, truth be told, would hardly affect the family. since then, my relationship with my whole family has really fallen. I love them, but their way of life aint mine anymore, and I just cant be here anymore, neither. I need to be away and live on my own, but because of the reasons, I think that the relationship not only with my parents, but with the whole, WHOLE family will become very sluggish, and marginal at best. I know what Im sacrificing, but I really think and FEEL its worth it. Id wish it wouldnt have to be this way, but they wont ever accept the way I want to live (altough I really hope that in the future, when they see that I am really happy, they will) and, well... I wont say no to my very own hapiness and my girl's because of them. its hard and very, very sad, it makes me cry reaaally often, but there is no other way now. life has become really hard in the past 2 years and a half, and its hard to see that it has been like that because my relationship with my girl. but I really, really need her, I love her more than life, but I think that love got us a couple of years early. its been hard for everyone, but I think that it will be wort it. I know my parents want me to be happy, but its hard to accept for them my way of doing it. as I said, I hope one day they will. I dont want it to end like that.

Cano

also, I think that thread like these makes you realize that there is a dazzling array of great people in this community. from good to bad relationships, meny members have said and done things talked about in here that are real examples. kudos to all the great people here in GTP.
 
also, I think that thread like these makes you realize that there is a dazzling array of great people in this community. from good to bad relationships, meny members have said and done things talked about in here that are real examples. kudos to all the great people here in GTP.
Click to expand...
Yup, I agree 100 percent Cano.
Nice post and analogy. ;)
Misnblu
 

Latest Posts

Back