Why do people suicide ?

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Louishino

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Louishino
Recently a friend of mine jumped off a 14th floor of his condo. He killed himself because of love. He used facebook for his final 45 minute countdown, i swear i thought he was joking.

I am not trolling, here's the link on our national newspaper's website. http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2010/12/19/nation/7647966&sec=nation

Anyways, i'm still a little traumatize but what he did, i sometimes wonder, what would make a person suicide ? He did because of love which he had for 4 months. Would that be enough to kill a man ?

Why do people suicide ?

This was his last message posted on is blog to his girlfriend. Its all translated. Original Note was in Chinese Language
I gave up everything for you, you cast me aside so heartlessly again and again, you said you love me, you said you had never changed, it's just not in your mind anymore.

Your heartlessness given me the courage to end my life.

Sounds silly? I also find myself being silly, I'd told you before I love you, I said it and I meant it.. I'll love you till the moment I die.

Now I'd said it, I'd to give myself a breakthrough.

Not because of you, but because in my world, indeed there is only love, and you're the girl that I love most.

Today I wanna thank you for the one last sweet memory, the hug you gave me in the cinema really made me felt like everything was coming back.

Unknowingly, in the end, you still stuck to your decision.

You'd changed, you said you still love me, but I just felt that you just love being with them.

Love, is not my game. I have messed up with both of my relationship.

With regrets, at the end of the day, you didn't even give me the last chance to send you home, .....never mind.

I won't have the chance next time, because once you finish reading this, I would have already left the world.

I can't truly understand your love, but within these four months are the happiest moments in my life, so let them be in your memory for eternity.
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ps: don't go hating on my friend guys, he's already dead, some of you might just wanna say he is stupid or a coward, well yea, just keep it to yourself, i've had enough of that.
 
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There could be hundreds of reasons, mostly personal, that he may have never spoken to anybody about, it could be that the end of a relationship was the final straw.

But, for the most part I believe Suicide is mostly committed because:

Someone cannot live with something they have done, or experienced.

or

Someone cannot live without hope


You have my sympathies as it's the people left behind that have to pick up the pieces... however when somebody commits suicide, but makes a big deal of it before hand, that is unfair on anyone that knows them, and quite selfish in my opinion.
 
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Some people can be so unhappy that they feel suicide is the only way to solve their problems. If they have a family to look after, then it is an extremely hurtful and selfish thing to do. I believe that for people to do it they must not believe in an afterlife, otherwise suicide would probably lead them to hell.
 
PeterJB
I believe that for people to do it they must not believe in an afterlife, otherwise suicide would probably lead them to hell.
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The thought of hell actually sounds better than in this hell.

I spent 4 weeks at summer in 2 different psychiatry wards for suicidal tendencies/actions. I dont like the way the world works and my choice is to not take part in it. I am not depressed or what not, I just dont want to be here.

And before someone throws out the "it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem". That sounds way better than a temporary solution for a permanent problem.
 
vfrmaverick
The thought of hell actually sounds better than in this hell.

I spent 4 weeks at summer in 2 different psychiatry wards for suicidal tendencies/actions. I dont like the way the world works and my choice is to not take part in it. I am not depressed or what not, I just dont want to be here.

And before someone throws out the "it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem". That sounds way better than a temporary solution for a permanent problem.
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Isolating yourself from the world is not the solution either. If you do not like the way the world works then try to change it with the people around you. The most dangerous thing a person can do is give up.

Even if you do not succeed in changing the world to the extent that you would like, you can at least keep your head high and say at least I tried. Those who try are those who are really victorious in my books.

@Louishino: my condolences for your loss. It's always a tragedy when someone dear leaves this Earth.
 
The attempts are a cry for attention... those who carry it out, we will never know why. I am military and this is a big deal. I recently knew a girl who was crying to me for about two weeks. I talked and talked to her. Well one day she posted on facebook something random. I told her to call me right away, she didnt. Well I found out a day later that she had taken a bunch of pills. She came out and told me about it, I had no idea what to say to her.
 
People commit sucide if they think life isn't worth living any more, your friend may have loved this girl so much that if she broke away from him then he may think that because he loved her so much and now its all over that there is nothing worth living for.

Another common cause if depression, this can be caused my many other things, eg: clinical.

I f
 
It's an attempt that a person feels when life is no more, they are beaten by the cruel hand and want the easy way out. I've pondered suicide before, and looking back on that, well, it's hard to understand. No 2 words can describe the helplessness.
 
I am sorry for your loss. Humanity is diminished when one of us takes their own life for no good reason. So we are all diminished by this senseless act.

The article accompanying your post was a good one, and discusses the role emotions and social media played in this tragedy. I agree that a very young adult person who is in the grip of powerful emotions is especially vulnerable to extreme actions, including suicide.

Respectfully yours,
Dotini
 
As like others said, there are many things that causes someone to commit suicide but I just don't understand why suicide is the way to end things up when you actually can put on some effort to find a way?

I may have pondered or say to my friends I want to commit suicide when I have a problem that I think is just almost impossible to solve it. But then, I think it's the most idiotic move ever to do this. God gave us a brain to think and solve the problem with our minds. And I heard that most people commit suicide only because of a loss of love... Condolences to you, his friends and family.

Afterall, suicide is not a solution. It will just create another page of problems.
 
I'm sorry for playing the devil's advocate, but...
When Alviss Kong, 22, decided to take his life after his girlfriend of four months left him last week, he posted a farewell status on his Facebook page together with a teary photo of himself.
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I have little sympathy for him. It scares me to see that my generation & the next can't even handle such situations or less, without being over dramatic or in this case, suicide. 4 months, and he thinks the world has ended. The 45 minute play that we all know did nothing but to incite more drama proves my point.

As for the topic of suicide, I don't have a real comment for it, other than it being a tragic incident for all those involved in the end. The reasoning for it though, is something I rarely comment on because it usually comes back to something I find stupid, ala, the reason for this topic's creation.


[/2cents]
 
GT_Prologue5
It's an attempt that a person feels when life is no more, they are beaten by the cruel hand and want the easy way out. I've pondered suicide before, and looking back on that, well, it's hard to understand. No 2 words can describe the helplessness.
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Can't really add more, perfectly explained and I know what you are talking about.

EDIT: Also agree with McLaren by the way, I also have no respect for people who jump infront of trains, the engine drivers or passangers which will be involved in the tragedy often never recover from something like that.
 
RIP

I'm sorry for your loss. I've never understood suicide. Nothing can be so bad that I would want to not be living for it is the most precious thing in the world. I find it the cheap way out but to the 'victim' it is the only way out. I forget where I heard this quote but I know it has helped a few.

"Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem."
 
Rossticles
RIP

I'm sorry for your loss. I've never understood suicide. Nothing can be so bad that I would want to not be living for it is the most precious thing in the world. I find it the cheap way out but to the 'victim' it is the only way out. I forget where I heard this quote but I know it has helped a few.

"Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem."
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See my original post.
 
Simply put, because they are mentally unstable, not in a madness sense, but in a sense of loss of will, a loss of confidence, etc.
I have personally experienced someone very close to me attempt suicide and another family member who actually succeeded. I don't really like to think about it too much as the emotions going through your head are very strong.
The one who attempted but fortunately failed tells me that he thought it was the only way out simply becuse he was extremely fatigued, to the point he was deeply unsatisfied with how his life was going, even though if he was thinking straight, he would not have thought this (or at least, not thought death was the solution). This is only one reasoning though, and broadly speaking its simply a point where the mind gives up, it has taken too much and decided that its easier to stop than to go on and endure more.

It might seem to us a daft decision and completely illogical, but you have to realise that people who commit suicide are not thinking rationally. Or at least, they are not thinking of the big picture because their short term or even bottled-up pain is so great that thinking of the bigger picture or building up some moral strength is not possible.

Sorry for your loss, don't let it change your memories though.

G.T.Ace
Can't really add more, perfectly explained and I know what you are talking about.

EDIT: Also agree with McLaren by the way, I also have no respect for people who jump infront of trains, the engine drivers or passangers which will be involved in the tragedy often never recover from something like that.
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I wouldn't be so quick to judge people as being selfish. They are not thinking of those people when they do these things, they are as much victims as anyone else is.
I'm pretty damned sure I know one who wasn't selfish in the slightest his whole life...
 
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They aren't selfish- they're just so caught up with the pain that they forget about the real world, ala insane people, who become disconnected with their surroundings, losing touch. That's when they rid life of themselves, or are found in a corner doing all sorts of crazy acts. Having this problem of slight insanity, schizophrenia, etc etc. is not a bad thing if overcome, my up to now strange and cruel life has made me devoted to be a psychologist so I can help others with mental issues. It's all in a person's thoughts, which no one will truthfully understand.
 
Ardius
I wouldn't be so quick to judge people as being selfish. They are not thinking of those people when they do these things, they are as much victims as anyone else is.
I'm pretty damned sure I know one who wasn't selfish in the slightest his whole life...
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It is selfish in this very moment though and it doesn't really matter how the person was in the rest of his life. As harsh as this may sound, but there are tons of ways to kill yourself and if the person is still able to write a farewell letter (or a facebook message...), he (or she) should also be able to pick a different method.

Don't want to offend anyone, but I'm just thinking about all the people everyone seems to forget in these cases.
 
vfrmaverick
That sounds way better than a temporary solution for a permanent problem.
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In my view, there are no permanent problems. Life changes so much and so fast. Where someone is now is not where they'll be weeks/months/years from now. At the bottom of the pit, it is impossible to go lower. It is incredibly difficult to see any of that through the veil of depression. Every day seems worse than the day before it, and that may last a long time, but eventually, a good day sneaks its way in there :).
 
Well there is also the feeling of revenge.

Personally I was depressed at how people kept :censored:ing me over, and i was tired of life, and it seemed that killing myself would be the perfect way to ruin the lives of the people who I assumed ruined mine.

Also i felt lonely, and through suicide people would remember me as something.

Its scary looking back :guilty: at certain plans I would conjure up. Also at the same time I feel selfish, and for not seeing that the real people that would hurt would be my family and my friends.

As with your friend, he probably was really depressed, and wished to get back and emotionally ruin the person who :censored:ed him over. But at the same time, now his closest family and friends are the ones who suffer.:guilty:
 
vfrmaverick
The thought of hell actually sounds better than in this hell.

I spent 4 weeks at summer in 2 different psychiatry wards for suicidal tendencies/actions. I dont like the way the world works and my choice is to not take part in it. I am not depressed or what not, I just dont want to be here.

And before someone throws out the "it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem". That sounds way better than a temporary solution for a permanent problem.
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I'm sorry to say but you are depressed although you don't know it or you don't want to admit it to yourself. No insult intended
People whom are not depressed don't think the way you do.

Depression (and ultimately suicide) is caused by a short circuit of the brain. There is a chemical imbalance in the brain which drives you to kill yourself. In order to be able to kill yourself without problems, you must be very depressed caused by an imbalance of neurotransmitters in the brain that you want to kill yourself.

Suicide conflicts with all logic. Living organisms have a build in urge to survive. If the chemical imbalance is so out of control, this urge to survive will be replaced by an urge to die.

It's a sickness!
 
Besides wanting to kill myself I do nothing in the terms of depression. I am happy, I am not doing things spontaniously etc. And I disagree on the chemical imbalance, before you start with that remember my mom is a doctor and she already gave me all this info and told me 50 pills to take to fix it, screw that. Like I said I dont think this is how things should work, and no matter what I do there is no way to change the way 6+ billion people see the world unless I take over a country and force them to live how I think we should. That should get me shot quick.
 
vfrmaverick
Besides wanting to kill myself I do nothing in the terms of depression. I am happy, I am not doing things spontaniously etc. And I disagree on the chemical imbalance, before you start with that remember my mom is a doctor and she already gave me all this info and told me 50 pills to take to fix it, screw that. Like I said I dont think this is how things should work, and no matter what I do there is no way to change the way 6+ billion people see the world unless I take over a country and force them to live how I think we should. That should get me shot quick.
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Depression is a chemical imbalance of the brain, plain and simple. You can say whatever you want.
This imbalance can be caused by a genetical defect, stress, emotional stress, trauma, huge and/or long term psychological problems.

Stress, physical or emotional, causes a significant drop of the neurotransmitters seretonine and noradrenaline. If this is not fixed that the mechanisme of the brain to create enough serotonine is out of balance causing an even more shortness of serotonine resulting in going down in a emotional spiral making things worse.

Reading you're last post, it may be so that you're not depressed as you said. I think but I could be wrong because I don't know you. It seems that you're just unhappy with the way the worlds is right now. You seem to have problems with authority and you are pigheaded (again absolutely no insult intended). You wanting to kill yourself is a protest against to unfairness in this world, just like greenpeace takes action and protest, I think, right?

The only problem I have with your 2 posts is the contradiction. First you say that
I spent 4 weeks at summer in 2 different psychiatry wards for suicidal tendencies/actions. I dont like the way the world works and my choice is to not take part in it. I am not depressed or what not, I just dont want to be here.
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which clearly shows that you're unhappy and in your last post you said
Besides wanting to kill myself I do nothing in the terms of depression. I am happy, I am not doing things spontaniously etc.
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:confused:

But we don't want to hijack the OP's thread, this is about his friend and he wanting to know why he killed himself, not about me being right that it is a chemical imbalance of the brain and not about you being depressed or not. So don't you think we should get back on topic? ;)
 
I'm not saying that depression isn't a chemical imbalance, but..

Man is clever animal, we are capable of logic and being rational, if I were to evaluate my current situation in life, and I were to deduce that I was lonely and broke, with little chance of that changing, and every day I would have to get up and deal with that.. it's not depression, it's realisation... and in that situation it would be acceptable to be sad. To then label that person as depressed, pump them full of pills and then possibly separate them from the rest of society - hoping one day that all of a sudden they'll be happy with their life is ridiculous. It is the root cause that needs solving!

In the case of the OP, he was hurting after a relationship, I think most of us know how hard that can be, but it is the kind of wound that time will heal... it's never easy getting over somebody, after 4 months or 20 years... but people do it, all the time and every day... I guess it comes down to mental strength.. possibly the fight or flight reflex.

I'm not being unsympathetic, and I'm not a psychiatrist, but I have some personal experience with this kind of stuff and I firmly believe the most important things are to talk to somebody about your problems, they are not likely to give you any answers, reasons or solutions, but hearing yourself verbalise your problems and getting them out there can be a massive weight off your mind.

Do not focus solely on your problems, when people are upset/depressed they tend to focus on nothing else in their life, and they never see it if there is any good stuff. Focus on CONSTRUCTIVE change. Try to keep things in perspective.

Accept that it will be difficult to change things, but the only other solutions are destructive.

Seriously DON'T DRINK it may seem like an effective cure, but it will leave you with longer term problems... trust me.


It's just my two cents.
 
MatskiMonk
I'm not saying that depression isn't a chemical imbalance, but..

*snip*

I'm not being unsympathetic, and I'm not a psychiatrist, but I have some personal experience with this kind of stuff and I firmly believe the most important things are to talk to somebody about your problems, they are not likely to give you any answers, reasons or solutions, but hearing yourself verbalise your problems and getting them out there can be a massive weight off your mind.

Do not focus solely on your problems, when people are upset/depressed they tend to focus on nothing else in their life, and they never see it if there is any good stuff. Focus on CONSTRUCTIVE change. Try to keep things in perspective.

Accept that it will be difficult to change things, but the only other solutions are destructive.

Seriously DON'T DRINK it may seem like an effective cure, but it will leave you with longer term problems... trust me.

It's just my two cents.
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👍 +1. Agreed. You do know what you're talking about.

But if the depression is so severe and the body can't fix itself anymore, talking can't solve your depression, not even positive thinking. It helps if you're capable of talking about it and thinking positive, which isn't posible due to the severe depression.
Positive thinking, talking about it (therapie), sports, food, you're way of thinking and will power, no alcohol and ultimately, medication are the way of getting cured from a very severe clinical depression.

The OP's friend was probably prone to depression, more than other people. His break up must have snapped and short circuited his brain thus thinking and acting on it, that suicide was the only solution. The only way someone can kill himself is when this person is ready to die and has absolutely nothing to live for anymore. A lot of clinical depressed people don't kill themselves because they are not ready, because they still have a reason to live, how insignificant this reason is.

The OP's friend must have seen death as the only solution.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_depressive_disorder
 
G.T.Ace
It is selfish in this very moment though and it doesn't really matter how the person was in the rest of his life. As harsh as this may sound, but there are tons of ways to kill yourself and if the person is still able to write a farewell letter (or a facebook message...), he (or she) should also be able to pick a different method.

Don't want to offend anyone, but I'm just thinking about all the people everyone seems to forget in these cases.
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To call them selfish is to assume the person is capable of thinking of others and choosing suicide regardless. People commit suicide precisely because they are not capable of thinking like that, so I wouldn't call it selfish, they are a victim of their own emotional torment. They are not at a point of self-destruction because they are careless.
I'm also not sure telling people who are considering suicide how selfish they are is the best way to stop them doing it, as its only going to make them feel even worse - that their life is so messed up that they suffer whatever choice they make.

Obviously I know the effects on family and friends that suicide causes and I realise why you might think its selfish. But if you understood the mindstate of someone in this situation, you would hardly call them selfish. The whole point of suicide is the person feels there is no other way and they are unable to think about other methods, their pain is so great. The only way to stop people commiting suicide is to remind them what they do have, to suggest constructive and positive aspects of their life but more importantly, to try and recognise depression as early as possible and attempt to help them out of it before it escalates. Even this is not enough sometimes, sadly.
 
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So, I guess this could be asked in here. I don't feel sadness. Like, I don't get sad from anything. My grandparents (grandfather and grandmother) died a month back and only a month apart. I wasn't affected by it at all really. Felt no sadness, no remorse, nothing of the sort. Then about 8 months before that two of my friends commited suicide not that far apart. Again the same about not getting sad, etc. However everything else about me is completely normal.

So what, I'm semi-sociopathic? :lol:


But about suicide. I think the only reason people do it is because: a) they get caught up in the moment (of sadness) and it becomes all they can think about and they see the only solution to be suicide, or b) they feel that no one cares about them, become depressed, and feel that suicide is a way that people will notice them and remember them for something, or c) a combination of A and B
 
TheDrummingKING
So, I guess this could be asked in here. I don't feel sadness. Like, I don't get sad from anything. My grandparents (grandfather and grandmother) died a month back and only a month apart. I wasn't affected by it at all really. Felt no sadness, no remorse, nothing of the sort. Then about 8 months before that two of my friends commited suicide not that far apart. Again the same about not getting sad, etc. However everything else about me is completely normal.

So what, I'm semi-sociopathic? :lol:
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In some countries deaths are mourned, in some countries they are celebrated,
how people cope and react to death very much depends on their outlook on life, it doesn't automatically mean you don't care if you are not sad, just that you accept death as a fact of life, and are happy to remember the person's life, and not think of them just in death.

But about suicide. I think the only reason people do it is because: a) they get caught up in the moment (of sadness) and it becomes all they can think about and they see the only solution to be suicide, or b) they feel that no one cares about them, become depressed, and feel that suicide is a way that people will notice them and remember them for something, or c) a combination of A and B
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I think that is often the case, most of my experience come from talking to self-harmers (I'll admit that though I have never tried to top myself, my body bears the scars externally and internally of being 'depressed'), one of things that frustrates me the most is when people hurt themselves because they feel it is the only way to get attention. Another interesting thing is that for many, self-harm was enough of a release from "getting caught up in the moment" that suicide wasn't necessary.
 

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