Cytranear: Chapter 6: Departure [8 November 2013]

Discussion in 'GT5 Race Reports' started by Skython, Feb 25, 2012.

  1. Skython


    New Zealand
    You're not going to find much help here!

    Cytranear is being rewritten so it can be awesomermermerer in the GT6 race reports section!


    Chapter 1: Introduction (see below)
    Chapter 2: Rock Bottom
    Chapter 3: Advancements
    Chapter 4: 100% Possible?
    Chapter 5: Living Bad Dreams
    Chapter 6: Departure

    Chapter 1: Introduction

    Life? Life, isn't a beautiful, peaceful thing. It won't give you either of these no matter how much you work, no matter what if you do act like an ass, and change. Your own friends won't even accept you for who you have become. What people see life as, is a natural wonderland, where beautiful critters roam freely from land to land. And nothing ever goes wrong, nothing is even ugly. But in reality, what we don't look at, is the opposite. Life is where everything will go wrong, and you will suffer the entire time you're in it. If there's a single lesson I could tell you all now, if you're going to try and have a good life, give up now. The more you try, the less hope you get. And you'll end up dying alone. I can see myself going that way, I've been in this hospital for I don't know how long now. I think it's 2010, maybe 2011. I've been here for 7 years. And I don't see myself leaving any time soon. Only if I didn't do that one race. The one that changed my life.

    8th August 2004:

    The pines were blown by the wind, but only for a brief moment. As I, Jack Cytranear literally flew past each one of them in the Impreza I was running with my co driver, Steven Byers.


    The WRC season had been going great, I was amongst the battle of the decade as I raced between the then World Champion, Peter Solberg. And runner up Sebastien Loeb. Here we are at the 9th round and I'm only a few points behind Peter. If I take this I may even catch pass him.


    The roads here on the Eiger stages were perfect for the car, and Steven was pushing out those pace notes perfectly. I was after taking many seconds and thirds finally going to take victory. It was probably going to be the first time someone with a Southern American accent speaks up there.


    These are just shots that remain of that time, but then after the rally.


    "Hey, Jack!" Jack's Crew Chief ran over towards him completely ignoring Jack's celebrations.

    "Oh :censored:, what do you want!? Can't you see I'm celebrating here?" Jack said angrily.

    "No need to snap, but I have some information you really need to know!" The Crew Chief shouted to be heard over the roaring crowds as Jack walked towards the small steps used for a podium.

    "Speak to me, afterwards," Jack shouted.

    He shoved the Chief back and jumped on the podium with his Co-Driver, Steven Byers. He stood proud viewing all around, he looked to each side to see both Sebastien and Peter to each side not looking very impressed by Jack's antics.

    "Shame, suckers!" Jack shouted.

    Peter and Sebastien both just looked away in disgust.


    After the Podium.

    "Anyway, Chief! What do you want?" Jack demanded.

    "Well, we sort of don't have the funds to get you racing at Rally Deutschland, or Rally Japan. And since Peter has more of a chance, as he is more likely to beat Sebastien we are... How do I put this? Um... For now just go back to Texas, and if we can get you doing anything we'll get in contact," he waited for the angry shouting to come from Jack's mouth.

    "Well, :censored: you. I came here to race, I came here to win, and you decide that I'm suddenly not good enough to race. Even after winning? When I get home, I want to see a letter, I don't care what. But it better be giving me something to do, or your head will suddenly have my car's front bumper stuck on it. Got it!?" Jack shouted.

    "Thanks, for understanding," the Chief said sarcastically as Jack stormed out of the room.

    "Phew, I'm pretty sure no one would want such an arse to become champion."

    Well, there I was quite angry, a silly reaction to a acceptable situation. I still haven't been forgiven for how rude I was. I really wish I could find old Bob and give him my apologies in person. It would at least make me feel that I've gotten the message to him. But then when I got home, that is where it really happened.

    August 18th 2004:

    "Hey, baby," he happily kisses his girlfriend of the past two years.

    "I'm finally home, it's great to see you!" Jack added.

    They live in Trialerrá Mountains, located in Texas, America. Jack was originally born in England, but moved to America in the late 80's when he was just a little boy. So he sees it as his home. After spending the last two years away from home his American accent has faded a bit,but it is still obvious he is from Texas. He sits in his chair, and picks up the mail left beside his Laptop.

    ":censored:, I can't be :censored: with all these letters! Hey, Betty! Get in here!" Jack shouted.

    Betty, his girlfriend comes into the room with a very flash dress.

    "How much did that set you back!?" Jack asked frustratedly as he chewed his bubblegum.

    "Didn't cost me, it's costing you," she replied.

    "How much!?" Jack answered.

    "$940," she smiled.

    "Stop wasting my money, it's like that's the only reason you're with me," Jack spat out the gum through the window.

    "Um, no. I... Love you... Honey," she said suspiciously.

    "Yeah, you better. Anyway, I need you to help me read some of these letters, get reading," Jack said as he opened one letter.

    "Bills, bills, bills..." Jack muttered.

    "No, I'm not doing your work!" Betty shouted as she thundered out of the room.

    "Gee, what's her problem. Period I guess. Oh well, she looks damn fine so I'm good for her," Jack said to himself.

    He read another letter.

    "Oh :censored:... Oh my god!" Jack dropped his pen and his jaw flung open.

    "Dear J. Cytranear

    I believe you own a good big property. 70 acres if I'm correct, even with a good testing ground for your cars, like a mountain loop. Here I have enough funds to make you the richest and best pay for a driver in WRC history. In one year you'll be able to live comfortably without working another day in your entire life. All you have to do is beat me in a race at your home track in a two lap race, I'll be in my Corvette C5. I believe you are in ownership of a Viper GTS? It'll be a true American Showdown. Though there's a catch. If I win, I get everything. Your home, all of your property. Your Team position, and all of your fortune you currently have. Meet me at the track at 1400 hours this Sunday at the track if you're in on it.

    Signed, Max-Edge..."

    "I could do this, I've heard Max-Edge is a terrible driver, and his street racing results have always been :censored:! This will be easy," he sat back in his chair and looked again.

    ... Sunday...

    Jack drove out and headed around to the track.

    "This will all be a piece of cake! Can't wait for all that money," Jack said as he drove out there.

    He arrived early, and there was no one to be found. Then a Corvette appeared all of a sudden from around the corner.

    "Here we are, now let's beat his ass and be done with it," Jack said as the car stopped.


    A man stepped out of the car, he wore a black leather jacket, which looked very pricey and his pants were also very expensive looking. He must have been quite the rich man. Let me rephrase that, he is a very rich man. He walked over to me, his sunglasses shining the sun into my face. It was quite scary to see a man such as this. I don't remember what sort of facial shape he had, or his height. Just the clothing.

    "Hey, are we going to get this done or what?" Jack said as the man stopped in front of him.

    The man smiled, and then he spoke.


    "We need introductions my friend, my name is Max, but just call me Edge."

    His voice was really calm, quiet and a little croaky. he definitely sounded like he was trouble. But in hope for cash, I trusted his smirking face.

    "Yeah, and I'm Jack, but just call me Rich, because that's what I'll be in about 10 minutes," Jack said with a smile.

    "Aaah, the money, remember our deal. You win; the money. I win, the property, which includes this track, the fortune, the house, the belongings. Now, to finalize this. I need you to sign this. It's all you need to do," Edge placed the paper on the hood of Jack's red Viper and handed over a pen. Jack quickly read it and signed it.

    "Hmph, now let's get cracking shall we, we wouldn't want to leave you waiting for your fortunes for longer than the 10 minutes you estimated, would we?" Edge said as he approached his Vette.

    3... 2... 1... GO!!!


    "He's got a good start I'll give him that!" Jack shouted.


    "Just wait till he does something stupid"




    "He has no idea what he just got himself into"


    "This is easier than pissing on the lawn! How can he be that slow?"


    "I'll just take it easy and see if he catches me."


    "I'm getting bored of this."


    "Look at who realized that this is a race."


    "Driftin ain't gettin you nowhere boy!"


    "Oh my"



    The race carried on like that and then after the two lap race had ended I parked up at the hairpin. After laughing at his bad driving skills of course.


    "Where is he?"



    "There he is."


    "Now, very well done. It must be easy to drive so quickly with those extra Horses under the hood," said Edge.

    "Now, where's my fortune?" Jack demanded.

    "Just sign this," Edge said as he placed another piece of paper on the guard rail.

    Jack instantly signed ignoring the writing.

    "Now, Jack. Can you read what the paper says for me?" Edge said with a smile.

    "What have you done?" Jack said as he read it.

    "Oh :censored:!" Jack shouted.

    Edge kneed Jack in the stomach to get him on the ground.

    "Oh how generous of you to make it a race for Slow and Steady Wins the race, and the loser wins," Edge laughed and then some big men that looked like bouncers came into view.

    "And how dare you agree to letting me kill, your mother, your father, all siblings and the one you live with. You know, you're girl, Betty is it? You evil little man. So selfish," Edge laughed even louder.
    "How did you know," Jack struggled to form and push out the words as he lay on the ground.

    "Well, I've done my research, I heard you're a impatient character, with a short fuse. So I used that to my advantage, knowing you wouldn't read everything. Now, men. If you don't mind, dispose of this, Jack character. We wouldn't want people knowing anything, would we? Beat him, and throw him over," he pointed his head towards the guard rail and jumped into his Corvette.


    He smashed into the rear of the Viper and stopped.

    "And feel free to take the Viper to go home, men. I don't think little Jack here will be needing it any more," and then he took off.

    Anything after that, I don't remember. And why they did it at daytime... I still don't know. I just remember waking up in this room. Where I've been for so long now. I've been recovering from what they did, and to be honest. I'm not even sure why I'm here now. I'm not even sure I want to leave. I'd be so far behind the world, I'll have nowhere to go. And I don't want to be back in life just to die alone.

    "Hello Doctor," Jack said as his Doctor walked into the room.

    "I have some news for you, Mr... Cytranear. As the readers would have predicted, and yes, we are all aware that this is being recorded and typed out. You are free to go, we have assigned you to an Old Folks home just until you can get into a flat or somewhere life that. You've had enough muscle training here to be able to live like a normal person again. You'll be escorted out of the building in two hours," the Doctor then left the room.

    "Oh no," Jack said as he dropped his head back into the pillow.

    ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

    Thanks for reading. What is most important at the moment is comments, so I know if this idea shows any more or less promise than "The Rises and Falls of a Champion." So please comment below. It will be very much appreciated.

    EDIT: Special Thanks to SVX, for playing Edge!
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2014
  2. Michelin

    Michelin Premium

    Poor Jack.
    This has a lot potential, I like it.
  3. Schwartz

    Schwartz Premium

    United States
    I love it! Very original.
    Please continue this story.
  4. Techy


    United States
    Very intriguing to read! I hope you continue on with this story :tup:
  5. Skython


    New Zealand
    This is the response I like. ;) :cheers:

    Thanks, everyone. Funny that Schwartz should say it's original because to be honest. This was my go at going with the flow with other fics. :lol:

    And to add, because I almost completely forgot. Thanks to SVX for playing Edge! :cheers:

    "OI!!! Skythong!!! How dare you drop us!"

    "Oh no."

    "Yeah, we were your Star Drivels!"

    "Pupils, Greg... Pupils."

    "Pffft, same thing."

    "Jimmy, Greg... I'm sorry. It wasn't working out."

    "You won't be able to work... Or go out if we don't get a part in this!"

    "Okay, okay. Just put the Laptop down, and we''ll work out something!"

    "This better be good."

    "Jimmy, you've gone to the FIA GTC haven't you?"


    "And Greg, you've done some weird little stories, am I right?"

    "If weird you mean stories about evil lemons eating people then yes."

    "Well, why don't you do a write up on your races, Jimmy. And why doesn't Greg hand in some of his stories."


    "So, to tell the audience. What's happening is. Jimmy and Greg are part of this, but not part of this. They are not involved in the story as I don't have a way to put them in. So between Chapters every once in awhile one of Jimmy's or Greg's write ups will be used as a in between entertainment piece. What do you think of that?"
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2012
  6. SVX

    SVX Premium

    New Zealand
    Cool idea. :idea:

    Excellent start man. I'm looking forward to how you progress this. :D

    Oi! I take offense to that. ;)

    No worries man. :)
  7. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thanks, Josh. :cheers: To be honest, I'm quite excited about this one too. Not meaning to sound like I love myself.
  8. DK

    DK Premium

    Great start, I hope you don't drop this. Jimmy and Greg are right to be pissed off IMO. :lol:
  9. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thanks, DK! :cheers: I hopefully won't drop this, because I'm working hard to keep a few chapters ahead of schedule. I'm in the middle of writing Chapter 2 already. And then I'll go up to 5 and then post 2. Then I'll stick 3 ahead at all times.

    And yeah, I felt I wanted an excuse to post some of the weird little pieces I write during English, so I used Greg's mad ideas as an excuse. Then I felt if Greg's going to have something, then Jimmy needs one, for when I'm not doing Greg's pieces. They won't be coming between every Chapter, we'll just be getting one every 5 chapters or so.
  10. Daniel

    Daniel Premium

    New Zealand
    Really liking where this is going. The huge downfall of Cytranear was thanks to some misread small print is a great idea but it seemed a bit rushed and artificial: some random, wealthy street racer turns up and says "here, take my money" to a famous and skilled racer seems a bit far-fetched to me. Also, introducing Cytranear seemed a bit rushed as well, like you could have easily expanded on his arse-ness.
    God, I sound like a criticising ass :lol:
  11. Skython


    New Zealand
    No, not a criticising arse. A criticising helper. But the "wealthy street racer" was confident on what would happen. Which was covered. He had done his homework and realized that Jack would be easy to trick, being an impatient, and slightly dim-witted person. Even if that didn't go down Jack signed the first paper which could be forged into the next so technically Edge had it either way. I was wondering about was it too weird for that to happen. But in a story, it's a story that needs to be told, so weird things happen in order to have that work.

    And yeah, it probably was a little rushed. I was just excited to get the ideas onto paper (or the Computer :p). Though to be honest you never know, I may expand on his arse-ness later on. I have already started with a flashback-like piece to give background on what Jack was. Who said I'm not going to have flashbacks to give more insight into who he was before. (In fact, I only thought about adding more flashbacks when you mentioned I could have talked more of it :p)

    And due to my lack of brain, where is the misread small print? Wait, is that a fault on your reading or my writing? :confused: Oh, now I've been reading my chapter. There's many mistakes that would embarrass me to reveal to the public (forum)... Yeah, I should be embarrassed now. :p

    EDIT: Again, I just realized what you actually meant. But no, there wasn't really any small print. Jack knew what he was getting himself into mostly, but had no idea as to what was on the second piece of paper, as he didn't read it. :lol:
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2012
  12. Skython


    New Zealand
    Chapter 2: Rock Bottom​

    Jack left the Hospital to go into an old folks home.

    "I'm only 27, and I'm going to an old folks home? This ain't right."

    Jack followed the directions on the map, and arrived at the home. It looked like a new building with cameras watching every inch of the place.

    "Hmmmm, better go in and see if I'm at the right place."

    Jack walked to the main desk, and was greeted by a fat Gothic woman.

    "Uuuh, hey. I'm Jack Cytranear. I've just been sent to stay here... By the hospital, does anything say I'm meant to be here?" Jack asked.

    He was still unsure because how often does a Goth work at an Old Folks Home? Jack looked at the Calendar on the wall.

    "It's October? Must be Fall then."

    He looked back at the lady.

    "Ummm, miss?"

    The woman sat there not blinking and drooling looking out the door. Jack poked her with a stick that was on the desk, and then she flinched and screamed in fright.

    "Who are you?" She asked with a monotone voice.

    "I'm Jack Cytranear, and I've been sent here by the Hospital to stay until I can find some place else to stay!"

    Jack frowned a little and then shook his head quickly to try and forget the stupidity of the lady. She began typing on the computer, and then hit it a few times. Still with a completely black expression on her face. Jack put his hand to his face.

    "Oh lord," he muttered.

    "Oh, yeah, just walk down there and you'll be shown where to go. We have a small hotel service at the front. You'll be in there. Not the old folks home, so you don't get force fed."

    After talking she instantly went back to staring out the door. Jack turned around and looked out the door to see what was out there.

    "Bakery, thought so," Jack whispered.

    He walked towards his temporary home.

    The room was a nice mix between new and old. All the cabinets, walls, beds looked old, but the room was warm and cosy, there is a modern oven, the bed was comfortable and the cabinet wasn't bug infested.

    "Isn't this nice," Jack said as he sat down.

    He sat down in the lounge and spotted some wooden rail-like pieces on the roof. Then decided to get some sleep, to get prepared for searching for a job the next day.

    Time went on for Jack in the Old Folk's home. Day by day, week by week he went to job interviews everywhere. Schools, shops, even tried for IT. But it was of no use. Every single time he applied they turned him away. It has now gotten to January 21st... Still nothing.

    Knock knock...

    Jack stumbles over to the door, after being woken up at 8 AM. He reaches it, unlocks the door multiple locks and opens the door.

    "Mr Cytranear, message from the Hospital..." the lady hands him the letter.

    Jack then walks away. Jack walks back to his bed and reads the letter.

    "There's no point locking the door I'm awake now anyways..."

    Dear Jack Cytranear

    We see you are yet to find a place elsewhere to stay. And we can't continue to support you as you live in the Home's rooms. After a discussion about what to do, and there was only one thing. By Monday the 23rd, January, you're out of the home, and on your own. If you have nowhere to go, then tough...

    Sincerely, wouldn't you like to know.

    "Oh shoot! What can I possibly do now!?"

    Jack looked around the room.

    "Got no friends, no family. No colleagues, and not even a job. Guess I have no place in this world... Like I shouldn't even be here... ..."

    Jack looks back at the roof, and then walks towards the cabinet, and starts rummaging through it.

    "There we go, that's what I want."

    Jack walks past the roof rails, and pulls a table under it. He writes on a piece of paper just a few lines and places the paper on the bench nearby. Then stands on the top of the table, he pulls out what he got from the cabinet... It's a rope, and he ties it to the railing, not even a doubt about his decision.

    "If I don't need to be here then why suffer."

    Jack pulls the rope around his neck and tightens it.

    "Good bye, I never met any of you, but maybe I'll see you again."

    Jack kicks the table from underneath himself, and then there is a sudden knock on the door, and then it opens revealing a blonde girl only maybe 2 or 3 years younger than Jack, a quick expression of horror spreads to her face as she propels herself over to the pocket knife which was sitting next to the paper on the cabinet, ignoring the paper she jumps up grabbing the rope and cutting it off as quickly as she could.

    Jack fell straight to the floor and collapsed.

    "No, no, no," said the girl as she dragged him across to the chair in the corner.

    She pulled old Jack onto it and noticed he was still breathing.

    "You fool!" She shouted.

    Jack coughed a few times.

    "Why did you bother?" He coughed out with all his voice he could squeeze out.

    "What on earth drove you to that?" The girl said as she sat on the table in front of Jack.

    "Well," Jack coughed again, and started breathing a little more normally.

    "I'll wait here until you're healthily breathing. Then you can explain yourself," the girl walked over and shut the door she had left wide open. She sat back down and tried to keep herself from frowning at him, and then started looking around the room.

    "Ahem..." She suddenly turned back and looked at Jack who was just about to start talking.

    "What would your family do if they heard you'd taken yourself out!? Huh?" She still sounded angry as she spat the words out.

    "Family? ... Family? I don't have family... If I did I wouldn't be in this position. Family is someone to fall back onto if you're desperate for a home. I had family..." Jack was still talking weakly.

    "Your friends?" the girl added.

    "Nothing... Still the same situation. I don't know anyone in this world now. I can't get work, and I'm about to be thrown out of here... The Hospital can't afford to hold me anymore." Jack continued.

    The girl started looking sympathetic and then put down the pocket knife and walked over to Jack.

    "How could anyone be in that position?" she asked.

    "It's a long story, so long story short... I was hospitalized in 2004. Then just 5 days later my family was murdered... ... Parents... Brothers... Sisters... And even her 2 year old baby boy... Friends all gave up hope and moved on, and I was alone in that hospital for another 5 years... With no one to talk to except for the dying and the heavily wounded. Which probably didn't hear me anyway... I came out last October, and the rest I've already mentioned..." Jack continued to look blankly into the distance.

    The girl was even more shocked and even more sympathetic than before...

    "That's terrible, that's all I can say." she thought for a second.

    "If you want you can live in my place for awhile, you can meet the guys. Just until you can get on your feet, and we'll help you get there," she smiled, a tear dropping from her eye.

    "You don't have to do that, really," Jack answered.

    "No, I insist," she said as she grabbed out her cell phone.

    "I'll just ring Dillan and see what he says," she said as she dialled a few numbers in.

    She waited for an answer on the other end and walked out of the room.

    "Hey, Dillan. I need to speak to you about something."

    "Yeah, it's urgent."

    "Well, I was at work, and when I walked into one room I met a man who is about to be kicked on the street..."


    "Hold on, let me speak first."


    "Can we just have him stay with us until he can get on his feet?"


    "Thank you."


    She walked back into the room.

    "It's perfectly fine for you to stay,"
    she said.

    "I can't say how much I appreciate this... Thank you," Jack added as he stumbled up onto his feet.

    "I'm Diane Wilsborough, and you are?"

    "Jack... Jack Cytranear," Jack nodded and smiled.

    "That name is familiar, have we met before?"

    "No, not from what I recall at least."

    "Oh okay. Now pack your things, we're moving soon."

    "I don't have a car any more," Jack said as if he was embarrassed.

    "Pack into my car and we'll be off."

    "I don't have anything to pack really... Except for these," Jack put a couple of small things into a bag and then followed Diane out of the room.


    "Wow! A 330i? Didn't expect that," Jack said as they reached the car.

    "Thanks, it was a gift," she replied slightly embarrassed at Jack's reaction.

    They drove off down the road.

    At the destination.

    "Well, here we are. Home sweet home," Diane said nervously.

    "It's not bad, who else lives with you?" Jack asked.

    "Well there's Dillan. He's a motorsport fan, and also a fan of keeping fit, he's stronger than almost anyone I know. But really while having a big ego he's quite nice. And then there's Andy, who is very shy, more like anti social. He's a technology wizz and he's into all that. It took him about quarter of a year for him to actually speak and entire sentence to any of us. I don't know how he'll react to you," Diane laughed as they walked towards the door.

    Knock knock!

    The door opened slowly revealing a tall skinny figure.

    "Hey Andy, this is..." Diane stopped as the man ran away and into a room.

    "Jack..." Diane finished.

    "I don't think he likes you... I'll talk to him... Uh, wait here," she forced a smile and walked in and shut the door.

    Jack looked around and waited patiently. The house was surrounded in a nice small garden, with a few medium sized trees on the front of the property. The house was made of brick and from what Jack saw the inside was quite new. Then the door opened again.

    "You should stay away from Andy awhile," Diane whispered, and then showed Jack the way inside.

    The house was just what Jack had thought judging from the BMW he rode there in. It was a nice and quite tidy place, and was relatively new. Some of the walls were Maroon and others a brown colour. The colours blended beautifully in the place's open rooms. They arrived in the Kitchen, where Jack just caught a glimpse of Andy running around the next corner to hide.

    "Wow, this is a nice place you guys have here. Who brings in the dough to get you all this?" Jack asked.

    He sat down on one of the Kitchen stools and rested his arms on the bench.

    "Well Andy works for Selphorax Electronics, and I guess you know who that is," Diane said as she carried on walking past Jack and through the next door. Jack jumped up again to follow almost knocking over the stool in the process.

    "It's one of the biggest companies in the US isn't it? They do a lot of work for Japanese car companies," Jack said as he caught up to her.

    "Yeah, cool huh?" Diane said.

    She ducked into another door at the end of the hall. As Jack walked in he realized that this was where he would sleep. There was a big bed, and some drawers, all of which were empty.

    "Here we are, unpack and hopefully then I can introduce you to Dillan, see you soon," Diane smiled and left the room.

    20 minutes later

    Jack finally headed out to the lounge after taking 10 minutes to find it. In there sat a stranger, a big man, built like a tank. He was clean shaven, bald and looked as if he was about to kill someone. He looked over at Jack.

    "Who are you?" He had a grunt to his voice which would blow for miles if pushed.

    "Uh... Jack... Um, Diane said..." Jack was interrupted as the man approached.

    In no time he was towering over Jack, all Jack did was gasp. The man smiled and threw out his hand.

    "Glad to meet you, I'm Dillan," he laughed.

    Jack stood there frozen.

    "Ha! Impressed are you? I thought so," his accent sounded like he was from New York, he laughed and walked back to the couch to watch more television.

    "What are you watching?" Jack looked at the screen to see a cartoon playing.

    "Johnny Bravo, just love the little kid programs."
    Dillan didn't move his head away.

    (on TV)

    Johnny points at three women, and then they run away. Johnny sits back in his chair.

    "They've gone to spread the word."

    Dillan laughed.

    "I can so relate to that! Everyone always spreads the word when I show up!" He said smiling smugly.

    Jack chuckled and left the room and heard the sound of paper rustling and fabrics softly connecting with carpet coming from his new room. He walked in there and Diane stood there reading a bit of paper.

    "What happened to privacy?" Jack stood there with a slightly disgusted look on his face.

    "No privacy in this house, and I read you can drive a car? If so I can get you a job working as a courier... They need someone to get some packages to their destinations quick," Diane said as she looked up from the paper.

    Jack raised an eye brow and chuckled.

    "Me, Jack Cytranear, an ex WRC driver working as a Courier... You're joking, right? Don't you know how embarrassing it is for a driver or ex race driver to become a courier?" Jack asked.

    Diane looked at something past Jack...

    "I think I know where I heard your name now, look behind you..." Diane tried not to laugh.

    Jack turned around to see Dillan standing there with a big grin on his face, a piece of paper and pen... He nodded his head at the paper.

    "Alright," Jack signed the paper.

    Dillan continued to stand there.

    "Uuuuh, hey, what's up?" Jack said in an awkward manner.

    "Do you want that following you around all day or a job as a Courier?" Diane asked.

    "(Sigh) I'll get my coat..." Jack said as he turned around...

    "Uuuh... Excuse me? ... Be gone? ... What do you want!?" Jack laughed.

    Dillan dropped his head down low and walked away in disappointment. Jack looked to Diane. She shrugged, and they headed off for the job.

    _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

    Sorry for the wait, I've had this ready for almost a month but I've only just started Chapter 3, I was planning on getting a few chapters ahead first.
  13. Korza

    Korza Premium

    New Zealand
    It's about time! Good chapter bro. :tup:
  14. DK

    DK Premium

    Damn, that chapter had some serious highs and lows.
  15. Michelin

    Michelin Premium

    Awesome job! Poor Dillan :lol:
  16. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thanks guys. I'm happy to see you guys managed to notice within twelve hours of my posting it up. Thanks for the great support. :cheers:
    Last edited: Apr 9, 2012
  17. FireEmblem10


    United States
    Good so far.
  18. Korza

    Korza Premium

    New Zealand
    I noticed it 30 minutes after. I was waiting for another chapter...
  19. nitrorocks


    United States
    Lol. I hope he gets facing again!
  20. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thanks, guys. :cheers:

    And Nitro, what on earth does "get facing again" mean? :dopey:
  21. nitrorocks


    United States
    Grrrr!!! It's the stupid auto correct on my phone. I meant to say I hope he gets racing again. Lol
  22. Skython


    New Zealand
    Oh, good. ;)

    Anyway, Greg has been working and his first piece of creative writing is ready.


    The seagulls sit in their lear consuming the remains of the enemy pigeons and stolen potato chips. Some say that in a pool of green goo and egg yoke lies a human shaped creature who's gender isn't known. No one can get to this prisoner as the Seagulls breathe fire on anyone who ventures too near. The body rests on a pedestal decorated in carved plans for world domination and the Seagull's rise to power. But then others who make it out alive say that there is a 30 meter tall bourbon bottle that the seagulls worship. Others say that there is an evil Pukeko Seagull breeding program in the works. This scares us all as the Pukeko's fight with the ducks will be over, and then the new breed of Pugulls will take down Earth's defenders, the Pigeons and ducks. Then we'll all me in the trouble when the Seagulls use us all as slaves.

    Good luck Pigeons and Ducks, don't lose to the Pugulls.

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    I hope you enjoy this as much as my class did as I read it out to them.
  23. DK

    DK Premium

    Greg has one hell of an imagination. :lol:
  24. FireEmblem10


    United States
    Ehh, that's what crows with machine guns are for.
  25. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thank you... I mean, uh... Greg will appreciate it. ;)

    Crows aye? Hmmmm. Maybe, maaaybe...
  26. Skython


    New Zealand
    Chapter 3: Advancements

    "Hello, my name is Dale, and it's nice to meet you," said the man at the chair.

    "Any work experience?" He looked over the desk at Jack.

    "3rd place in the WRC in 2004? Does that count?" Jack looked over at Dale.

    "Hmmmm, Jack Cytranear, the WRC driver who managed to seal third place despite missing the entire end of the season? Ha! What would ever drive YOU to going for this job! It's embarrassing for a driver to be a courier, you know!?" He laughed.

    "Yeah, but I'm being forced," Jack looked back at the window.

    Diane stood there proudly and powerfully holding a piece of paper with "Dillan is waiting" written on it. Dale looked at the window...

    "The missus? She'll have you getting her free shoe delivery soon," he laughed.

    "No, not the missus, just a friend, now I just need some work. What you got?" Jack said.

    Dale leaned onto the desk.

    "Now, to be honest, I don't got any jobs available in the line of a normal courier. So I can save you some pain and embarrassment there. But I got some friends in another market that could use a quick driver. A hired gun to get themselves out of messes. I know someone down south about an hours drive from here, a beginner who can't afford another car. But he got himself into a pink slip event that is going to take place on the dirt roads outside of town. You up for it? It's all I've got right now." Dale leaned back into his chair.

    "I'm not so sure this is 100% legal, but if it's all you got," Jack said as he thought further.

    "Here's the address, go there alone and don't take her. You got it? When you get there, you're looking for Jerry Dufrense." Dale reached into his desk drawers and pushed a folder with a map and address written on it.

    "Oh, and by the way, if you can... Please, try and steer him away from street racing, it's a dangerous game, as I think you would know," said Dale.

    "Alright, thanks," Jack shook the man's hands and left the room.

    "Did you get the job?" Diane asked enthusiastically.

    "No, I got a different job. Though I have to leave town for a day or two," Jack said as he showed Diane the map.

    "Uggh, I'll drive you up there... No exceptions," Diane said disapproving tone.

    "Thanks, I really appreciate it," Jack smiled happily.

    "I still don't know why applying for a Courier required such a serious interview, I felt like I was applying for some big job or something, it was freaky," Jack thought as they left the building, they got into the BMW 330i and drove away to their destination.


    A lot of silent driving later...

    "Why are you so quiet, it's like you're hiding something," Jack looked at a silent Diane as they drove on.

    "Don't know, just something seems strange here. Why do you have to go here? Couldn't there have been something that wasn't long distance?" Diane continued on as Jack continued to be distracted by the constant passing cars and got distracted by other thoughts.

    "Are you even listening!?" Was all Jack heard from Diane as he snapped back into reality.

    "Ugh, something about not trusting this entire work business, and some other things," Jack said while doing a terrible job of hiding the fact that he is talking out of his arse.

    Diane just sighed and continued to drive on.

    "So what did this man say about this job?" Diane continued to act like the stereotypical angry woman.

    "Not much. He said someone named Jerry Dufresomethingrather needed some driving related work done, and that it would pay off well." Jack tried to avoid saying it was a pink slip race.

    "I may barely know her, but she seems really over protective," Jack thought as Diane's response continued to not happen.

    "Is it legal?"

    "Uuuuh, yeah I'm quite sure it is," Jack said nervously.

    "It better be, I don't want to be encouraging anything illegal," said Diane.

    "My father, illegal racing killed him, you know?" Diane continued and started gritting her teeth.

    "Do you know who the illegal racer's name was?" Jack asked.

    "No, I only remember seeing the article in the paper, when it read, "Local businessmen dies during death race!" She pushed her voice to sound stable.

    "So he was killed by street racers? But didn't race himself?" Jack asked.

    Diane raised her voice.

    "I've said enough now! ..." She frowned heavily and held her mouth tight shut.

    "Okay then, sorry to have asked?"



    "Silence it is then, luckily it was silence and not the other option... Death from screeching," Jack muttered as he leaned back as they continued on in silence.

    "Enough about my misfortune, how about yours!?" Diane suddenly burst back into conversation.

    "Uh, honestly I don't really want to talk about it," Jack tried to stall time because he knows that the reason for his downfall was connected with street racers also, and didn't want to upset her any further. Or risk being thrown out the door.

    "I talked about mine, I'm pretty sure you can talk about yours," Diane snapped.

    "Can it wait until we get there? Please?" Jack in an attempt for his saviour asked for some time.

    "Okay," she just sighed, frowned and drove on.


    As they drove along silence continued, and it continued to bug the both of them as they had no radio because all the radio stations were terrible.

    "Hey, Jack? I'm sorry about before, when I talk about my father, I tend to get really angry or really sad. I didn't mean to snap about it, and I didn't mean to try and push you to discuss something your uncomfortable discussing," Diane looked over to Jack sympathetically.

    "It's quite alright, however I can tell you my story if you promise not to murder me for it," Jack responded.

    She gave Jack a slightly enraged and confused look.

    "Well, in my time of racing WRC, I was an ass-hole. A real :censored: head according to all the guys in every team. After winning Rally Switzerland, I was told by the Chief that the team couldn't support the entire team for Rally Japan and Rally Deutschland, which this being the young anger filled ass-hole I was. Sent me shouting and abusing, and threatening. I went home, and found a letter in the mail, from a man named Max Edge, who offered his entire fortune, his entire large fortune at that, if I beat him in a race. Now, he is one of the worst racers on the scene, and unfortunately a street racer..." Jack was interrupted.

    "Wait, wait, wait!! You're into street racing? Should I just let you go now, and let you die away so that no one remembers you, or just kill you now?" Diane looked intensely infuriated now, as if she was prepared to kill Jack.

    "Wait, let me tell the entire story..." Jack added.

    "Fine, but if it tells me you're going to be some low hung loser who does street racing, I can't be held responsible for what I'm going to do," Diane added angrily.

    They were almost there, so if Diane's reaction was to be negative he wouldn't have far to walk.


    "Okay, so as a young man I took this for truth and decided to accept the challenge, on that Sunday, it happened. We lined up at the start line on the closed race circuit, me and my Viper, him and his Corvette, I signed the forms he had supplied, and we took off. It was a two lap race and I completely smoked him, won with flying colours, and then we stopped at the hairpin of the track. The turn had a big drop just beyond the guard rail followed by loads of shrub, sharp rocks and trees. When he finally arrived I signed the final paper. Unfortunately, I was impatient enough to simply sign the paper not reading it at all, turned out it was a deal that confirmed that the loser is the winner, and that he now owns everything I own, along with the right to the lives of my family. The reason for their deaths was my own selfishness, and my downfall was deserved. Edge beat me, and then his bouncers came to finish me off, and as I plummeted down the hill my memory ended. The next thing I remember is being in the hospital. Turns out I was found by a tourist, who I got to thank soon after. Luckily I wasn't in an angry mood do I didn't snap. Some years later, I came out, and you know the rest." Jack sighed and sat back into his seat.

    Diane was silent for the next minute, Jack tried to figure out why she was so quiet about it all but couldn't figure it out.


    As they arrived at the location she started...

    "You are a horrible, horrible man. One of the most selfish I have ever met in my life, and I wish not to deal with anyone who allowed their own family to die for no reason. And I can't believe you used me so that you could put yourself back on the "Street racing" map. Whatever it is you're doing here, I don't care what it is, and I don't care what you do afterwards, because this will hopefully be the last time I see your soulless face. Is that clear? Now, get out and be gone, I'm not going to help you anymore," she stopped and gave a rude gesture as a sign for him to get out of the car and then she drove away in a rage, and then there was silence.

    Jack watched as the BMW turned off of the street and headed past his point of view. He looked left, right and aup before sighing and walking to his right to try and find this Jerry character.

    "How did that go so wrong? I'm at rock bottom once again, I thought she was a kind heart, and I thought she'd understand that I'm a changed man... Obviously not. Well, I better forget it all, I barely even knew her but I did trust her. I'm probably better off not to trust people, maybe they are all selfish as well, and are no better than I was. This Jerry character is probably shady as : censored:. Let's see here," Jack found the address and knocked on the door.

    A shout came from inside, followed by some crashing and rustling sounds, and then the door opened to reveal a young man, looked as if he were younger than 20, and he was thin and weakly built with quite a bit of facial hair. He looked quite poor.

    "Sir, may I help you?" He asked.

    "Uh, yeah.Is your name Jerry Dufrense? I hear you have a Pink slip dilema, and you need a driver to help you win?" Jack answered.

    "Oh, you're "the guy!" Come straight in and take a seat." He ran into his lounge where the lights were turned off and he shut the TV off, flicked the lights on and sat down. They both took a seat.

    "So, what's the story?" Jack asked.

    "Well, I've been into street racing over the last few months, just practicing so that I can take to the real track and show that I'm a capable driver. But suddenly I met this guy, he helped me win a race or two, and then started to threaten me, and he pushed me into this pink slip deal, and now if I don't beat him and his goons I'm going to lose my Golf, and I love my Golf, I've owned it for a few years and I know I'm not fast enough to beat him on my own, so I called on my dad, And he found you. Now I need you to teach me how to drive fast by tomorrow night," Jerry looked to Jack who just gave him an irritated stare.

    "Your father failed to tell me that you were his son... Anyway, I'm Jack Cytranear, and I can definitely help you win this with my driving experience..."

    "Wait, you're Jack Cytranear!? THE!!! Jack Cytranear? I heard that you died, I thought you vanished. Oh my god, I remember and am really surprised to meet you this way... Wow!" Jerry almost had a fan-boy fit.

    Jack just glared at him, and intentionally coughed.

    "Anyway, I have an idea as to how we can do this, teaching you would be impossible. But cheating, like how this man cheated you is possible," Jack smiled and leaned forward.

    "How?" Jerry showed interest.

    "Well, I still have the cast I had from my injuries back in the day, the Hospital forgot to take it. I can put that on, and claim I'm riding as passenger. They won't recognize me to be who I am, as no one has yet recognised me, maybe because I've aged a bit over 7 years. We arrive, tell them I'm a passenger, but then switch seats just before the race. We'd have to be outside of their view of course but it's possible. And then I'll do the driving, and then we'll switch over again after in the same fashion as we did beforehand, park up, claim the money and leave," Jack nodded.

    "Wow, I'm impressed, apparently you weren't the smartest driver but that's a good plan," Jerry relaxed and sighed in relief.

    "Well, after spending over half a decade in hospital you think about things that usually never happen in reality, like how to deal with driver swaps with no one noticing, how to make a murderer run away, and more," Jack replied.

    "What happened to you anyway?" Jerry asked.

    Jack thought back to Diane's reaction to his story and decided to avoid telling anyone else.

    "You don't need to know," Jack focused his eyes in the distance before snapping back to reality.

    "Anyway, I need to sleep somewhere, can I stay here?" Jack asked.

    "Yeah, sure," Jerry smiled.

    "What were you watching anyway that you had to turn the TV off for?" Jack asked.

    "Nothing..." Jerry said suspiciously as he pushed the DVD case out of view.

    "Okay, I'm going to get some sleep, as it's been a stressful day. Tomorrow, you get to keep your car, and earn another one," Jack stood up, and called it a night.


    Wow, I'm really slow, it's been over half a year since I've updated this... Chances are no one can be bothered now. :p But let me explain! I sort of just never got around to continuing it, now I've got another 2.8 months off, I can work on this more now, so expect more in the future. :D Just today I have all imagery prepared for the next chapter, and I'm going to spend most of today writing.
  27. FireEmblem10


    United States
    YUSH, you're back to writing!
  28. Turtle


    United States
    I, for one, forgive you for not updating this in half a year, because A) It was a great chapter and B) It's kind of like me with my gallery, taking long breaks that I hadn't announced I'd be going on. Speaking of which, I'm thinking of bringing it back to life.

    ~Turtle [​IMG]
  29. Mat123


    Oh, cool! Another story to read! :D
  30. Skython


    New Zealand
    Thanks guys. And GTTurtle, I'm thinking of maybe bringing back my Gallery too, if I get around to it. :p I just finished Chapter 3, but then my computer froze and I hadn't saved it, and I have to rewrite the last part of the chapter, the part with way more text than the rest of it. :rollyes: Stupid dodgy computer, I've actually had to restart it about 7 times in the last 4 hours. Chapter will be up in maybe 3 or so hours.