Did I do the right thing?

  • Thread starter Thread starter skylineGTR_guy
  • 46 comments
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did I do the right thing?

  • Yes

    Votes: 17 63.0%

  • No

    Votes: 10 37.0%
  • Total voters
    27
skylineGTR_guy

skylineGTR_guy

Messages
5,677
Ok basically I found out that my best friend is going to be going out with this girl that he has been with maybee twice and today he was well "fooling around" with her if you know what I mean and he told me about it and I wrote him back and pretty much told him to watch his back and that I thought she was a loose slut and that if she was willing to do that stuff with him after 1 or 2 times he has to realize that he is probably not the first....and that I have no respect for his new "girl"....so he is probably very pissed at me and will probably never talk to me again

I feel that by telling him this, if anything happens I know that I did what I thought was right and as his best friend I did my job and warned him even if it means we will no longer be friends....

I just emailed him so I don't know how he will react

my question is do you think I did the right thing?
 
No. Let him find out for himself, or let the girl tell him.

Otherwise, people should butt out of personal relationships.
 
Originally posted by M5Power
No. Let him find out for himself, or let the girl tell him.

Otherwise, people should butt out of personal relationships.
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let he girl tell him what? that she is a slut?

I didn't tell him what to do..actually in my email I wrote that I'm not telling him what he should or should not do just that I was giving an opinion as his best friend of what I thought of the whole thing...or mainly what I thought of her.....

I really don't care if he does it later but 1 or 2 days? honestly If that isn't slut bechavior then what is? he did everything short of paying her....
 
You shouldn't talk like that about your friends girlfriends, even if you don't like them. Friendship is something easy to lose.

Speaking of personal relations, where the hell is Acid X?
 
Originally posted by PunkRock
You shouldn't talk like that about your friends girlfriends, even if you don't like them. Friendship is something easy to lose.

Speaking of personal relations, where the hell is Acid X?
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Umm....hes known her for like a week and has only been with her for like 2 days max....

I realize that he may not be my friend any more after he reads what I wrote but thats a chance I'm willing to take because he IS my best friend and this way I will fell no moral guilt on my part knowing that I told him what I thought......
 
How old's your freind and his girlfreind.
If they weren't going out then that e-mail would of been not so bad. But the fact that it sounds like (stop me if I'm wrong) you called his girlfreind a
slut
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is quite a harsh thing to say. I wouldn't even ever really dare say that to my best freinds girlfriend. I think though if he's truly you best friend he will see that you mean good intention from it and that you're thinking the best for him. Yet on the other hand he might see you as being jellous perhaps :confused: . Although, they're getting into that realtionship pretty quickly I have to say. If he's really madly in love with her then he'll ptobably take that e-mail the wrong way. Personally I think that you did a really correct thing and it's good to get your emotions out there to your freind, instead of pretending you like them and having to lie to your best freind which shouldn't happen. We'll good luck with it and hope you still stay good freinds with him and you don't loose your best freind mate over something as silly as some little hoe by the sounds of things. Let us know what happens. It's always difficult to comentate on situations where you don't know the full picture.
BTW how long have you known your best mate?
 
This is one of the age-old dilemmas. I would say that it's best to keep quiet, and be there for your friend when it all goes pear-shaped.

Now your friend will almost certainly be disagreeing with you, will be completely denying any form of understanding of what you mean, and then calling into question your own personal motives for telling him what you did.

Unfortunately, these things always go badly for the person who thinks they are doing the right thing. In this instance, the "right thing" is to keep quiet.

You should read a book called "The Go-Between" for a signal lesson on what happens in these circumstances.
 
This one is a sticky wicket.
When I was in college. One of my Pool Playin' buddies got himself engaged to this girl. She was long, lithe, and mildly cute.
The issue--Whenever he wasn't around, she would come onto me. Her favorite thing was to wave her bony a** in my face, and to bend over in front of me while we played pool. There were also LOTS of suggestive comments, and offers of sexual "favors" while her bony a** was in my face.
I eventually, (like a week or so) started being nasty/mean to her. But I never said anything to my bud about his girl's behavior. At first, I thought she was just kidding around. Until she "timed" one of those bendover episode so I would run into her ****-first!:eek:
He called me on it a couple of months later, after he had (suprise, suprise) broken up with her. He got right in "my grill" like he might try to take me on over it. I reminded him that I had him outweighed, outmuscled, and had a much wider mean streak when it came to open hand combat. I also reminded him that I didn't do anything with his then girlfriend. We did finally have a good laugh over it. But we had some tense moments leading up to that laugh. I still think that I should have had my wife, break that skinny little witch in half.:lol: Cause I did tell her about it. She just told me that she trusted me, but, that I needed to deal with it. The wife also told me that Dave's girl was prolly thinking that it was safer to mess with married men, because they aren't gonna tell anybody anything that might get back to their wives.
I think you did right, up to a point. It's always "bros before ho's".
However, when you want to confront your bro on the behavior of his woman, you need to tell him to his face, deal with the anger, possibly the a**-whoopin', then get back to watching the game.
 
Originally posted by PunkRock
Speaking of personal relations, where the hell is Acid X?
Click to expand...
Thank God he's not here, otherwise we'd get into another massive debate about pr0nos, or boobs, or sluts, if you like. Choose a word, mix'em and match'em if you like.
 
Yeah, like everyone has said, keep quiet about it. You can't take back what you already said, so just forget that you said that all together. However, when your friend and that girl break up, your friend will realize the truth, and will start b!tching at himself for being so stupid. *Or he should* Anyway, just keep quet, that's all I can say.

Yeah, where IS AcidX?
 
You shouldn't have said anything. It's his business. Now when she gives it up to the next desperate guy who comes along and he's all crushed, he'll come crawling back and tell you you were right. And you might be. But he won't listen, ever, nobody does. So it's not even worth saying.
 
yep,.. say nothing at all,.... unless you have proof of her carrying an STD,.. other than that,.. it's your buddy's business and if he wants your opinion he'll ask for it.
 
I just want to clarify that he is not yet going out with this girl but plans to...

and as I said I feel better knowing that I warned him even if it means our friendship.....I've known him for about 6 years and this girl has just popped up within the last week...

to complicate things even more she works at the same place my best friend and I do....however they work in the same department while I work in the pharmacy....
 
I'm not gonna vote, because i can't see going either way...

You should've been thinking about this before you told your friend about this girl, and you should'nt have used such a harsh word to describe the girl...
 
Originally posted by M5Power


Yep!

Or let him find out, if he cares. [/B]
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yeah If it were anyone else I probably would but since I care I just wanted to make sure he knew....

Atleast I expect him to be mad so I'm ready for whatever happends....It's not like he can beat my ass or anything.....
 
Originally posted by skylineGTR_guy
Ok basically I found out that my best friend is going to be going out with this girl that he has been with maybee twice and today he was well "fooling around" with her if you know what I mean and he told me about it and I wrote him back and pretty much told him to watch his back and that I thought she was a loose slut and that if she was willing to do that stuff with him after 1 or 2 times he has to realize that he is probably not the first....and that I have no respect for his new "girl"....so he is probably very pissed at me and will probably never talk to me again

I feel that by telling him this, if anything happens I know that I did what I thought was right and as his best friend I did my job and warned him even if it means we will no longer be friends....

I just emailed him so I don't know how he will react

my question is do you think I did the right thing?
Click to expand...
No, I have to say you didn't.

1) If the girl is a slut for fooling around on the second date, what does that make your friend? A slut.

2) Unless you've got evidence that she's planning to cheat on him and has done so in the past, you've got no right to tell him what you think she's going to do, especially not simply based on the fact that she's been "fast" with him. Maybe she just really really likes him. Maybe he already knows it, has no higher expectations for the relationship, and is just enjoying the ride while it lasts.

3) Unless you're invited to give your opinion on somebody's relationship, don't assume they want to hear it. Just like you should never assume a woman is pregnant unless you can see an actual baby coming out of her at that moment.
 
Originally posted by Giancarlo
I'm not gonna vote, because i can't see going either way...

You should've been thinking about this before you told your friend about this girl, and you should'nt have used such a harsh word to describe the girl...
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well don't you think she is a slut?

and anyway atleast I feel good about what I did...Now all I can do is wait to see what happens....
 
Originally posted by neon_duke
No, I have to say you didn't.

1) If the girl is a slut for fooling around on the second date, what does that make your friend? A slut.

2) Unless you've got evidence that she's planning to cheat on him and has done so in the past, you've got no right to tell him what you think she's going to do, especially not simply based on the fact that she's been "fast" with him. Maybe she just really really likes him. Maybe he already knows it, has no higher expectations for the relationship, and is just enjoying the ride while it lasts.

3) Unless you're invited to give your opinion on somebody's relationship, don't assume they want to hear it. Just like you should never assume a woman is pregnant unless you can see an actual baby coming out of her at that moment.
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1) yeah well recently my friend has been taking anything he can get so I think it's more out of desperation especially since the last relationship didn't work out too well and he really really liked that girl...

2) enjoying the ride....thats EXACTLY what he is doing....

3) actually he emailed me and told me what happend and did ask my opinion...so It's not like it was an unwanted opinion...just one he probably wont expect....what was I supposed to do? ecourage him or something?
 
Originally posted by M5Power
What's wrong with that, as long as it's not hurting anybody (i.e. cheating)?
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as I said I think it's more out of desperation.....

he was really stuck on the last girl (who was also a friend of ours) and the relation ship ended on badly for him....I still speak to both of them but he and the girl are no longer friends or speaking to each other....this happend a couple of weeks ago and ever since hes been weird...
 
Originally posted by skylineGTR_guy
as I said I think it's more out of desperation.....
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Yeah, so he's desperate. So what? I still see nothing wrong with being desperate and wanting a good time. Let him be, in my 'opinion.'
 
You're friends with a slut.

Is he a teenager? Teenaged males are desperate by definition. Almost all teenaged relationships end badly. Nothing out of the ordinary here, including the busy-body friend.
 
yeah he's a regular teenage guy so I guess It's considered "normal"...however there is a girl he has liked for a while now...and she likes him but they are just weird.....he has liked her even before his last girl (the one he broke up with)....I'd guess I'd be ok If he did something like this with her because he has known her for a while now but what he is doing now, I feel is no different the going out to a street corner and picking up a total stranger......
 
After re-reading this I have to say that in the situation I outlined above you would be right.
But in this case, your friend has been "hurt" by the break-up with a girl he really cared about.
He's probably messing with this other girl because he's not totally over the break-up, and he needs to be "desirable" to someone. Let this run it's course.
 

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