If bobs could talk, what would they say

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"One 24 hour race per day split between four of us is fine but sixty 20 minute races per day for all 6 of us for 2 weeks straight isn't cool, you slave driving 🤬."
 
Bob talking to the car, ok K.I.T.T engage turbo boost now
 
Bob gets in car,
"What's the third pedal for?"
 
I thought that Bob was related to the Stig. Assuming that, he speaks Duck.
 
So if your bob could talk to you ,what would he say to you?
Click to expand...

"My name's not Bob!"
 
I'm glad I get to race other Bobs now, and not just those mean AI types. They're just machines, you know?
 
Nyeheh. Watch me brake this FGT on Indy!
 
I. Rich ~ 'pedal to the medal? at Daytona? you crazy,.. better play this one safe. '
 
After spinning out on the last session of the nurb 24 hours... "umadbro?":dopey:
 
My Barb says fire me if you can drive better.đź’ˇ:indiff:
 
Mine would probably ask why i'm asking him daft questions like what would he say!
 
Mine...

-"whaaaaat ... ALL ALONE ... :scared:!"

-"WOOW :dopey: .. a new car to destroy !!" (at the beginning ..my poor audi R8 5.2 Fsi)

-"Agaiiiiin :grumpy:"

-"What i have to do ?? are you jocking boss?? "(by my mistake i put him in a race with 200hp less than his opponents :guilty:)

IR
 
Bubba the Bob: "Boss, I swear I had the car in full control through the spinout, but that wall just came out of nowhere and crashed into the rear corner of the car! Honest-to-God truth!"

Bobini: "The first rule of Italian racing - what is behind me, is not important."
Me: "But Gino - you were last...."
Bobini: "...."

Bob The Finn: "Too much tuurrkey in the breakroom. Must bravely take a nap while ahead..."

Bob de Bob: "OK, I can race against these cars. But you have to remember - I can't do this Indy track run on Comfort Softs...."
 
During latter stages of Le man 24hr.
Me, "Right, it's been raining for a few laps now......lets try inters......"
Bob 1 "Ok bosss....!"
*Bob duly pits in and puts on Racing Inters*

Bob 2 "Ahhh don't like these tyres bosss, amm pitting in....."
Me "No, don't pit in, it's raining, they will be better in the long run."
*I forget to un-pit him so he pits for racing softs*

Me "What the *&^% did you do that for?"
Bob 3 "Not me boss, bob 2 didn't like 'em"
Me "Right, spray is forming, get pitted in for some Racing inters"
Bob 3 "Whatever you say bosssss"

*Bob 3 pits and puts on some fresh racing inters*
Me "Right, these are the tyres to be on, am going to make some coffee, be back in a miute..."
Bob 1 "OK bosss, see ya"
Bob 1 "You there boss???, Bossss, BOOOSSSSSS???, OK, he not 'ere, I don't like these tyres, ama pitting!"
*Bob 1 pits AGAIN!!!*

Me "ahhh, coffeee, WHAT THE *&^%!!!!!, I said DON'T PIT!!!"
Bob 2 "Bob 1 was sliding all over, didn't like them"
Me "and why have you dropped a shed load of time on this lap???"
Bob 2 "errrrr, I kinda gone done spun the car, it's raining kinda hard now bossss"

*Finally bob pits in and stays on racing inters and goes on to win the race*
 
I hate this x1 it's too precise when can I drive a yellow bird :D
 
"Seriously, intoxicants impair driving ability?!!"
 
"Going fast makes me dizzy, but mashing teh brakes from 320km/h to 30 km/h for the corner is just fine
 
Me: "Increase Pace"

L.Jenkins: "Ok lets do this LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROOOOYYYY JEEEEEEENKIIIINSSSS!"

*Bob crashes*

Me: "You 🤬"

L.Jenkins: "Its not my fault!"

Me: "Yeah, well.. Atleast we got chicken!"
 
"Thank you, Anonymous!! THANK YOU!!! :bowdown:"
 
Me:"OK, you're alongside an opponent and you've got the inside line for the next corner. All you've got to do is brake a little later than him, and the position is yours!"
Bob: "OK, I'll try..." *brakes early and backs out of the move* "... I c-c-can't, it's too scary! I'll happily fly round the outside of him at the next hairpin though..."
 
Me: Go Bob go!!
Bob: I'm trying, but I don't know how to work this thing
Me: Push the pedals with your foot, get out of the sandtrap, everyone's passing you!!
Bob: (pushes accelerator pedal) No, that doesn't solve my problem. I NEED A DESTINATION!!!!
Me: I knew I should have removed the GPS system before letting Bob drive it.
Bob: (Drives onto the track and gets hit by cars lapping him) Weeee, spinnies, weeeee I see a lot of sky and trees. Wait, where's the ground... Ow...

Another race
Me: Bob, you idiot. Stop braking.
Bob: Please, stop being mean.
Me: But your in last, and you were in 5th before
Bob: Aahh, that should do it. Boss, I have solved the problem, there is a brick under the brake pedal to stop me from braking and a brick on the accelerator to keep me from not accelerating.
Me: Oh god
Bob: now into the hairpin... Weeee I'm going fast, wait where did the black strip I was following go
Me: (facepalm, loads shotgun)
 
He would ask for a brain.
 
Bob #1 - R. Richmond Level 24 Hot-headed
Me: How can you win a race at Indy with 100hp (Like the Wind) less than your oponents and cannot win a race with 200hp more than the rest of the field (Trucks race)?
R. Richmond: Maybe I don't like to drive trucks at high speed tracks?
Me: You 🤬

Bob #2 - K. Nakamura Level 0 Neutral
Nakamura: May I stop boss? I'm mentally and phisically tired from this 20 lap race at Rome?
Me: Hold yourself for the next 17 laps and you get some well needed rest. And plus, your driving my 908, you can drive very calmly around.
Nakamura: If I spin, don't say that I didn't say about being tired.
Me: You 🤬
 
bobs: i hope he is not leaving his ps3 running while he is at work this week
me: go make me some money boys
bobs: your going to need it to pay you light bill
me: crap i didnt think about that
 
Bob would say "stop making me drive this x1 so much it's messing my internal organs up from to much G-forces" lol
 
I can imagine my driver I.Frankfurter shouting "Stop calling me d*ck sausage!" after one too many rages about overtaking:sly:
 
C. Van Damme: "Daddy, can I have another ticket for the bumper car riiiiiide??"
Then he drools...
 
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