If bobs could talk, what would they say

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"One 24 hour race per day split between four of us is fine but sixty 20 minute races per day for all 6 of us for 2 weeks straight isn't cool, you slave driving 🤬."
 
I. Rich ~ 'pedal to the medal? at Daytona? you crazy,.. better play this one safe. '
 
Mine...

-"whaaaaat ... ALL ALONE ... :scared:!"

-"WOOW :dopey: .. a new car to destroy !!" (at the beginning ..my poor audi R8 5.2 Fsi)

-"Agaiiiiin :grumpy:"

-"What i have to do ?? are you jocking boss?? "(by my mistake i put him in a race with 200hp less than his opponents :guilty:)

IR
 
Bubba the Bob: "Boss, I swear I had the car in full control through the spinout, but that wall just came out of nowhere and crashed into the rear corner of the car! Honest-to-God truth!"

Bobini: "The first rule of Italian racing - what is behind me, is not important."
Me: "But Gino - you were last...."
Bobini: "...."

Bob The Finn: "Too much tuurrkey in the breakroom. Must bravely take a nap while ahead..."

Bob de Bob: "OK, I can race against these cars. But you have to remember - I can't do this Indy track run on Comfort Softs...."
 
During latter stages of Le man 24hr.
Me, "Right, it's been raining for a few laps now......lets try inters......"
Bob 1 "Ok bosss....!"
*Bob duly pits in and puts on Racing Inters*

Bob 2 "Ahhh don't like these tyres bosss, amm pitting in....."
Me "No, don't pit in, it's raining, they will be better in the long run."
*I forget to un-pit him so he pits for racing softs*

Me "What the *&^% did you do that for?"
Bob 3 "Not me boss, bob 2 didn't like 'em"
Me "Right, spray is forming, get pitted in for some Racing inters"
Bob 3 "Whatever you say bosssss"

*Bob 3 pits and puts on some fresh racing inters*
Me "Right, these are the tyres to be on, am going to make some coffee, be back in a miute..."
Bob 1 "OK bosss, see ya"
Bob 1 "You there boss???, Bossss, BOOOSSSSSS???, OK, he not 'ere, I don't like these tyres, ama pitting!"
*Bob 1 pits AGAIN!!!*

Me "ahhh, coffeee, WHAT THE *&^%!!!!!, I said DON'T PIT!!!"
Bob 2 "Bob 1 was sliding all over, didn't like them"
Me "and why have you dropped a shed load of time on this lap???"
Bob 2 "errrrr, I kinda gone done spun the car, it's raining kinda hard now bossss"

*Finally bob pits in and stays on racing inters and goes on to win the race*
 
Me: "Increase Pace"

L.Jenkins: "Ok lets do this LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROOOOYYYY JEEEEEEENKIIIINSSSS!"

*Bob crashes*

Me: "You 🤬"

L.Jenkins: "Its not my fault!"

Me: "Yeah, well.. Atleast we got chicken!"
 
Me:"OK, you're alongside an opponent and you've got the inside line for the next corner. All you've got to do is brake a little later than him, and the position is yours!"
Bob: "OK, I'll try..." *brakes early and backs out of the move* "... I c-c-can't, it's too scary! I'll happily fly round the outside of him at the next hairpin though..."
 
Me: Go Bob go!!
Bob: I'm trying, but I don't know how to work this thing
Me: Push the pedals with your foot, get out of the sandtrap, everyone's passing you!!
Bob: (pushes accelerator pedal) No, that doesn't solve my problem. I NEED A DESTINATION!!!!
Me: I knew I should have removed the GPS system before letting Bob drive it.
Bob: (Drives onto the track and gets hit by cars lapping him) Weeee, spinnies, weeeee I see a lot of sky and trees. Wait, where's the ground... Ow...

Another race
Me: Bob, you idiot. Stop braking.
Bob: Please, stop being mean.
Me: But your in last, and you were in 5th before
Bob: Aahh, that should do it. Boss, I have solved the problem, there is a brick under the brake pedal to stop me from braking and a brick on the accelerator to keep me from not accelerating.
Me: Oh god
Bob: now into the hairpin... Weeee I'm going fast, wait where did the black strip I was following go
Me: (facepalm, loads shotgun)
 
Bob #1 - R. Richmond Level 24 Hot-headed
Me: How can you win a race at Indy with 100hp (Like the Wind) less than your oponents and cannot win a race with 200hp more than the rest of the field (Trucks race)?
R. Richmond: Maybe I don't like to drive trucks at high speed tracks?
Me: You 🤬

Bob #2 - K. Nakamura Level 0 Neutral
Nakamura: May I stop boss? I'm mentally and phisically tired from this 20 lap race at Rome?
Me: Hold yourself for the next 17 laps and you get some well needed rest. And plus, your driving my 908, you can drive very calmly around.
Nakamura: If I spin, don't say that I didn't say about being tired.
Me: You 🤬
 
bobs: i hope he is not leaving his ps3 running while he is at work this week
me: go make me some money boys
bobs: your going to need it to pay you light bill
me: crap i didnt think about that
 
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