Red-Line

[Belisario93]

oh my god that last bit is beastly. can't wait for chapter 18

 

[VTiRoj]

I think I've done too many Difficulty:10 races at Trial Mountain to really be suprised the Evo beat 4/5s of the grid with ease, but that last drag race with the M3? EPIC. From the pics it looks like the M3's big bumper got past the finish line first, which makes me wonder, is the finish line smaller than the paint on the floor or is it the wheels that break the timing beam in GT4?

Nevertheless, epic chapter!

And who was that on the phone at the end?

 

[mafia_boy]

That pic shows the M3 infront, The LANCER LOST!! jk.

Great chapter once again d24/7. :tup:

 

[Paulie]

Ooh, mystery big racer man. He's going to fall hard when he loses.

 

[arthurtwp]

really nice work eh!!! like the parallels with initial d..!! keep up the good work!! haha

 

[Jonn 79]

you know what is cool about this story... its the seeming dichotomy between Tori and Kyosuke. Tori gets lower opponents and Kyosuke gets the harder ones. Maybe there is more to it than meets the eye. Perhaps the writer has something in store for us that will blow us away! The possibilities are endless!! Wooohoooo!

 

[Skygrasper550]

oh my god that last bit is beastly. can't wait for chapter 18

uhh, 'beastly'??

I think I've done too many Difficulty:10 races at Trial Mountain to really be suprised the Evo beat 4/5s of the grid with ease, but that last drag race with the M3? EPIC. From the pics it looks like the M3's big bumper got past the finish line first, which makes me wonder, is the finish line smaller than the paint on the floor or is it the wheels that break the timing beam in GT4?

Nevertheless, epic chapter!

And who was that on the phone at the end?

actually, that last race was set on Difficulty 3 even so, those cars are faster than me on the straight, so I really pulled a miracle there

That pic shows the M3 infront, The LANCER LOST!! jk.

Great chapter once again d24/7. :tup:

Yeah, it looks like it lost

Ooh, mystery big racer man. He's going to fall hard when he loses.

really nice work eh!!! like the parallels with initial d..!! keep up the good work!! haha

yeah, part of my inspiration is Initial D, the rest is other race reports in this sub-forum.., 👍

you know what is cool about this story... its the seeming dichotomy between Tori and Kyosuke. Tori gets lower opponents and Kyosuke gets the harder ones. Maybe there is more to it than meets the eye. Perhaps the writer has something in store for us that will blow us away! The possibilities are endless!! Wooohoooo!

Right now, my mind is bursting with ideas for Red-Line, there are so many that I can't choose!!

BTW here's a fact: The next race is from a replay I am digging up, yes it's an old replay and I've been itching to finally include it..,

thanks for all the comments..,

 

[Jonn 79]

Keep em coming. Perhaps you could even edit the the replay host it on youtube and put in some super titles

 

[VTiRoj]

Its been a week. I tried my hardest but I can't take it anymore!

Where is Red-Line Chapter 18 : Stars and Stripes and the damn Mystery Man!!

Please.

 

[Paulie]

Should we start an angry mob again? This next chapter is lining up to be epic.
Note to d24/7, not all muscle car drivers are import hating red necks, some of us respect them just the same.

 

[Jonn 79]

*taps shoes on ground patiently awaiting the newest chapter*

 

[Skygrasper550]

sorry guys, a broken and corrupt flash drive suddenly prevented me from posting Chapter 18. I was about to post it last week Monday, but as I plugged the flash drive in, "USB Device Not Recognized" .., I'll have a friend of mine (which is a computer technican BTW) look at it and see if he can fix it..,

 

[VTiRoj]

Flash drives are 10 a penny these days. But good luck sorting out your current one!

 

[Skyline49]

I'm going to speak up and say that this is a great story to read.

Personally, I don't like the fact that it is dominated by very little text and a lot of pictures, but that is just style, and that's your choice.

It doesn't really matter, because the plot goes deep enough and is compelling enough that I really want to read more.

It's also inspired me to write my own story, "Velocità".

Keep up the good work.👍

 

[Skygrasper550]

Chapter 18 : Stars and Stripes​

Team MUGEN.....you just wait for me.....



The plane took off as we are leaving Germany. I still can't forget about my first circuit race, I'm so happy! I wish I could tell my parents about this...

While I was on the cargo bay checking on my Civic, Kyosuke called me. "Hey Tori, Kairi-san said he wants to see you."
-"Me? Where is he?"
"In the meeting room. He said you should go right away."
-"Why?"
"I dunno, must be something important."

We hurried to where Kairi is. My car still had a little dirt from the last race but I'll take care of the later.

"Kairi-san, you called for me?"
-"Ah, Tori. Yes, come over here."
He showed me his laptop. "Back in Nippon, I've sent some of my assistants over in my racing school to your house. They brought a laptop that your parents could use. I thought you should communicate with your parents once in a while, you must miss them by now."
He looks at the computer. "All we have to do now is wait for them to be online...." The laptop blipped "There! You can now have a chat with your parents."
-"Really? Arigato gozaimasu, Kairi-san!!" I'm now overjoyed!
"It's the least I could do. You've done so much for the team, I thought you should have a break. Take your time, tell Kyosuke if you're done."
-"Hai, Kairi-san!" Then he left the room.

"Well, how'd it go?"
-"He couldn't keep from smiling."
"See? I figured he wanted to talk to his parents. Our boy must be so happy by now."
-"You're certainly right about that. Being able to communicate with his parents will help him a long way, he's still young. Say Yamato, how's the Spoon Civic?"
"Aside from getting a little dirt because Tori went off track during practice, it's still in good shape."
-"I see."

I'm communicating with my parents via a chatroom.
"Hey Son, how're you doing? It's me, Dad."
-"I'm fine Dad. How are you and Mom? Is the shop OK?"
"We're good, we have no problems with the shop, I easily got hold of a minivan. It helped us a lot."
-"That's good to hear!"
"Hi Tori, it's me, your Mom."
-"Hey Mom!"
"Did you get yourself hurt? Are you feeling ill?"
-"No Mom, I'm fine."
"That's great! You've been away for quite some time now, We miss you."
-"I miss you too, Mom, Dad..."

We had quite a long conversation, I didn't notice two hours have already passed. Kyosuke fell asleep while waiting for me.

"I've got to go now, We still have to take care of things over here."
-"So soon?"
"Yes, Dad. But don't worry, I'll have a chat with you and Mom again some time soon."
-"Take care of yourself, Son."
"I will."
-"Tori, take care not to get into any trouble."
"I will, Mom. Thanks. Goodbye now."

I couldn't help but be happy, I really miss my parents so much and such an opportunity to talk to them like this has come my way. Oh yeah!

We finally arrived to our next destination, America, particularly in California.
"I want to taste the hotdogs around here!"
-"Me too! I'm starved!"
We first went to a nearby restaurant, both Kyosuke and I are hungry from the trip. After that, we went to the mall before settling in at the nearby hotel.

"You two need rest now, you've been through all sorts of all places today. Tomorrow we race."

*the next day*

We arrived early at the race track. Was I amazed, it looked awesome.

"Sugoi... I've never seen anything like it... Yamato-san, what's this race track called?"

"When me and Kairi were still young like you, back in our days this place was called Sears Point Raceway. Now it's called Infineon Raceway. This is a premier circuit in North America, so all sorts of cars race around here. Stock cars, Touring cars, Le Mans, and a lot more."
-"Wow, this place IS awesome."
"You bet!"


There are a lot of people around here, we also saw all kinds of cars go around the track. Leave, enter, and zoom past the pit lane.

"Hey Steve..."
-"What is it, Henry?"
(points at a car) "Is that what I think it is??"

"!! They're here?! Is it really 'them'?"
-"No doubt about it. They're the only ones brave enough to bring a Civic along with them. But...why here?"
"To race, of course."
-"Then we challenge them."
"That's a great idea. Let's see if the rumors about them is true, that they've won numerous races around Europe."


As we were setting our cars up for the coming races, two people approached me.

"Hey there. Nice day for racing, isn't it?"
-"Uh...yeah....it is."
"Is this your car?"
-"Yes, why did you ask?"
"Is it a Spoon Civic, or just a plain Civic Type R you customized?"
-"It's a Spoon Civic. How did you know?"
"We can tell."

Kairi noticed us, "Excuse me, can I help you?"

"We were just talking, that's all. By the way, do you guys form a team?"
-"Yes, why?"
"Hehe, absolutely no doubt. You guys are Team MUGEN, am I correct?"

What the? How did these guys know about our team?

"How did you know?"
-"You don't know yet, but news about your team are now spreading throughtout the worldwide racing community. It even came here to the U.S., people say you've been winning races all throughtout Europe. Is that true?"
Kairi smiled a bit, "Only one way to find out."
-"Is that so? Very well then, we challenge your team to a race."
"We accept. What cars are you using?"
-"Over there."

"How about yours?"
-"We use the Spoon Civic. Is that okay with you?"
"Sure. So this will be a natural aspiration engine battle, I like it. Whoops, almost forgot to introduce ourselves. I'm Steve Tyler."
"Henry Johnson."
-"Nice to meet you. I'm Kairi Kagiyama, this is Tori Akawa."
"Nice to meet you, Tori."

(Kairi turns to me) "Looks like we found some people you're going to race against. Tori, you wait here. If Kyosuke or Yamato comes looking for me, tell them I went to the registration office."
-"Yes, Kairi-san."
He pats me on the shoulder, "Don't worry, you can win against them."

After registering, Kairi immediately started my practice session. "Are you ready, Tori? Same drill as before, 5 laps. That should be enough."
-"Hai."

I was a bit nervous as I rolled out of the pits. Am I really going to race against those guys? I just saw their cars back then, as they went around the track. They're incredibly fast...

~"Stay focused, Tori. This is a very tricky course for your level. Be careful."
"I will."

"Aaagh! That's a tough corner!"

"What the? What kind of track is this?? I can't see the corners!"

(bump on the side wall) "Gaah!"

~"Tori, are you alright?"
"I'm...fine...just a little shaken, that's all..."

"I can do this..."

(car shakes) "Aaarrrgh!"

*back at the pit lane*
"Kairi-san, I'm getting worried about Tori. Will he be able to race properly under these circumstances?"
-"He will. I believe in his abilities."
"I just hope he will..."

"I can't keep on going like this, there are a lot of places where I could understeer and go off track."

"Not again!! Grrr!"

(brakes to a standstill)
~"Hey Tori!"

"...Uh....Kyosuke?"
~"Are you okay? It looks like this course is too tough for you. Kairi-san is getting worried, you can go back to the pits and rest for a while."
"I'm fine, thanks for the concern."
~"Are you sure? You sound like you're tired already."
"I'm just a little shaken. I can handle this."
~"Okay...don't push yourself."
"I won't." (whispers to self) "Come on Tori, pull yourself together..."


*after a few laps*

"...So that's how to go around that blind corner...be a little slower but sure about your speed..."

"I should hug the inside on this sweeper, to avoid the gravel."

(snaps his finger) "That's it! I should not be rash on this course, I have to control my speed at all times. Yosh, time to go full out on the 5th lap!"

(Yamato holds the stopwatch) "Wow, impressive. He did a 1:50 on the last lap. Not bad."
~"All right Tori, that last lap ends your practice. Come back now to the pits."
"Hai."

As I came back to the pits, "Hey Tori, are you alright?"
-"I'm okay."
"You sure?"
-"Yeah, don't worry, I just need a little rest."
"We're all getting worried about you. Kairi-san asks if you can race later."
-"I can."
"Okay..."

After getting a short rest, Kairi informed me of the lineup for my race.


1st: Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R '00

2nd: Callaway C12 '03

3rd: Audi S4 '02

4th: BMW M3 '03

5th: Pontiac GTO '04

6th: Spoon Civic Type R '00

So, I do end up racing against against Henry and Steve. I sure hope I can win this race, my Spoon Civic against their powerful muscle cars. At first look, It's clear they would win. Race 11, begin!!

next on Red-Line - Chapter 19: Against Impossible Odds

don't miss it!!

 

[mcsqueegy]

AWESOME!!!! Can't wait for the race to begin . Another great one.

 

[Skygrasper550]

thank you for your patronage.., i'm saving money for a flash drive, my previous one is now totally busted, so the race will really have to wait.., my inability to upload pictures is evident in my garage.., once again I say this, "sorry for the inconvenience..." ..,

again, thanks..,

 

[Paulie]

Good chapter, but if the guy driving that GTO was called Paulie you'd all lose.

Nah, nice work, I can see why you chose this track to beat tough cars though (lowsy AI ).
I'm on the edge of my seat now!

 

[VTiRoj]

Good chapter, but if the guy driving that GTO was called Paulie you'd all lose.

Unfortunately Paulie spun off track and crashed when the BMW driver nudged him off.

Great chapter as always! 👍

I've videocalled my parents over MSN once when I was away for a month, so I can relate to Tori there.

Against Impossible Odds, hmmm, I think Tori can do it! More!

 

[Paulie]

Unfortunately Paulie spun off track and crashed when the BMW driver nudged him off.

Great chapter as always! 👍

I've videocalled my parents over MSN once when I was away for a month, so I can relate to Tori there.

Against Impossible Odds, hmmm, I think Tori can do it! More!

Snobby Bimmer driver, couldn't handle it when I was beating him.
I shall return!

 

[arthurtwp]

omgoodness.. is a win even possible.? like RWD muscle cars. :S and the M3.. cant wait to see wad ya come up with!! keep up the brilliant wrk!

 

[Paulie]

You have a new flash drive, we know this , so MOAR!

 

[Skygrasper550]

Chapter 19: Against Impossible Odds​

So, I do end up racing against Henry and Steve.., Race 11, Begin!!

[POV Shift]

"Hope I can pull this one off..."

"This first setion is very tricky, I have to be super extra careful."

"! How is this happening?? My GTO is being caught up by a Civic?!"

"...Dammit!"

"That was fairly easy, but that's just the tip of the iceberg."

"Next up, the M3."

(looks at left side) "Don't tell me that low-torque Civic just passed the GTO..!"

"So, you think you're pretty good, huh?"

"I can do this..."
"Curses, he's got the inside!"

"He's pretty darn fast! Where is he getting all that speed?"

"What the....?? Where the hell did he come from?!"

"This is definitely NOT my day!"

"Hey Steve, you are aware of the plan, right?"
-"Yeah. You stay right in front while I defend my position. After the race, we'll split our total earnings in half."
"Copy that."

"Hmm, speaking of defending my position, I wonder who's behind me--"

"--!! Holy....!!!"

"I was sure the car behind me was an Audi. How'd the hell.....That's just a Civic!"

"Henry! We have a serious problem!"
-"..What?! What is it?"

"Oh ---t...!"
-"What is it, Steve?"

"...The Civic....The Honda Civic, it's right behind you!!"
-"!! You let it get past you?!"
"..No..! I-It's not like that!!"
-"Dammit, Steve!!"

(Henry floors on the throttle)
"That Mustang pulled away with no effort at all, Henry's going to be a handful."

"Steve, you have to get your position back!"
-"That's what I'm about to do right now!"

"These guys are fast, but luckily I can catch up in the corners..."

"They're trying to box me in!"

"Blast it, that kid's matching our pace!!"
-"We'll just have to do our plan at the hairpin."
"Yeah, let's take that."

"Darn it, I could only drive and watch...that kid's pretty fast."

"Yosh, there's the hairpin."

"Oh no, not good!"
"What does that kid think he's doing? he's obviously on the wrong side of the track."

"Nice try, kid."
"Damn, that was all for nothing."

"Got to think carefully on my next move..."

"Steve, are you slacking off? Hurry up and take back 2nd place! Otherwise our cash earnings will be reduced!"
-"I'm trying, man. You two are just too fast for me to catch up!"

"Oh no, not again...Henry, look out!! behi--"
-"What now?"

"Beside you!!"
(looks at right side) "..!!!"

"I must be dreaming. No way that Spoon Civic can reach 1st place with our cars around!!"

"Grrr, this ISN'T going as planned!!"

"My Civic's engine is no match for their muscle cars, they're incredibly fast on the straights."
"You're mine, kid!!"

"I have to max out these corners, it's my only chance of pulling away from them."
"That kid's good with the brakes, considering his car."

"Henry, have you thought of a Plan B?"
-"Same plan as last lap, we'll box him in and block him. We need to get as close as possible to that kid."
"Copy."

"C'mon Steve, pick up the pace!"
-"All right, all right!"

"Our position's perfect. Let's do it!"
-"Yeah, let's go!"

"Now you're definitely mine, kid!!"

"That wasn't enough??"
"That wasn't enough??"
"Whoa, That was close!"

"Rrrngh!! I'm getting a migraine just thinking how to reclaim our positions, damn that Japanese kid!"

"Henry, you came in too fast on that sweeper!"
-"Gaaaah!!"

"Hmmm...it would seem impossible by now to take back track position, so..."

"Steve!! What the...what do you think you're doing?!"

"What's the matter Henry, can't handle a little competition?"

"This wasn't part of the plan!"
-"I know that, but the two of us getting beaten by that boy and his Civic wasn't part of the plan either. Since things got spoiled, I might as well spoil it up some more, haha!"

"Yes!! I did it!! I won!! Woohoo!!"

[POV Shift]


I got back to the pits, a bit tired and disoriented, but my win on the race more than makes up for things.

"Tori, you did it again!!"
-"Arigato, Kyosuke-san."
"Congratulations on your win, Tori. Excellent job, I have to say I'm impressed."
-"Hai, arigato, Kairi-san!"


"How much did you get?"
-"Just about $3,000...you?"
"I got $6,000."
-"I see."
(hands over $1,500 to Henry) "C'mon Henry, be a sport. We'll get our win some other time."
-"Perhaps you're right, *sigh*..."
"Even though we lost, that's the mos exciting race I've ever had."
-"Yeah, me too."
"Let's say we congratulate the kid over there."
-"Sure, let's do that."

As Kyosuke was giving me a nuggie, Henry and Steve came to us. They talked to Kairi.

"So, the news were true, you guys ARE a great team having great drivers. Just judging from the performance in the last race."
-"Thank you."
"Oh, in case you forgot, you still have to claim your prize money."
-"That's right. Tori, Kyosuke, let's go to the office."
"Hai."
"Hai."

"The two of us thank you and your team for the incredible race. We shall retire for the day and be part of the audience."
-"We thank you too."

So, I finished my race. As usual, Kyosuke comes up next. After getting the prize money, "Hmm, we could use this to buy new parts, especially new tires. Tori, are you okay with using this money for the team?"
-"Sure, Kairi-san. After all, I couldn't have won that race without all of you."

I want to rest, I'm beat. Back we go to our spot, Kairi let me rest for a while and let the setting up on Kyosuke's car in the hands of the other mechanics. I can't wait for Kyosuke to race, it looks like he's been looking forward to this.


next on Red-Line - Chapter 20: Club TVR

don't miss it!!

 

[VTiRoj]

Woah, the M3 overtook the Audi and was right on the tail of the Mustang at the end. Wheres the GTO? Where is it, Paulie? Oh thats right, LAST.

Sweet chapter, even sweeter since the battle didnt end the moment you took first, the Mustang and the Calaway actually tried fighting back! Nice little twist with the Calaway diving down the inside of the Mustang too.

MORE!

 

[mcsqueegy]

Woot!!!! Awesome stuff at Infineon. I never imagined the other cars fighting back so aggressively. But how you outpowered the M3 is a mystery...

 

[Skygrasper550]

added the final pic on Chapter 19, wherein Tori crossed the line to claim victory..,

Woah, the M3 overtook the Audi and was right on the tail of the Mustang at the end. Wheres the GTO? Where is it, Paulie? Oh thats right, LAST.

LOL

Sweet chapter, even sweeter since the battle didnt end the moment you took first, the Mustang and the Calaway actually tried fighting back! Nice little twist with the Calaway diving down the inside of the Mustang too.

MORE!

fact: this replay was saved before the previous 2 races, I just can't figure out when to put this up in the story..,

 

[Skyline49]

Great chapter!👍 My only problem is that (like Initial D) it's getting almost too predictable. It's kind of the same formula every chapter:

-[One of the main characters] faces a seemingly impossible challenge.
-[Character] slowly works their way up through the field.
-[Character] makes a comment about how he can't figure out how to get by.
-Once [character] makes a pass for the lead, it is taken away.
-[Character] makes a last minute pass and wins.

I'd like to see some more variety. Something more intriguing. This was a step in the right direction.👍

That said, it's still fun to read because of how it reads and the great photography (for the story section). Can't wait for the next one!👍

 

[Paulie]

Great chapter and great race.👍 Nice to see the others fight back, and the C12 take out the Mustang.

Woah, the M3 overtook the Audi and was right on the tail of the Mustang at the end. Wheres the GTO? Where is it, Paulie? Oh thats right, LAST.

Be quiet you, it was against purpose built sports cars, it's a 2 door GT. Besides, if it was me driving......

 

[bergauk]

*snip*



Be quiet you, it was against purpose built sports cars, it's a 2 door GT. Besides, if it was me driving......

It would have stopped and admired some sort of Ute on the side of the track.

 

[Adamgp]

If I was driving the Cobra R, the outcome would've been different.

Good story, but I agree it's time for a change. It's become rather predictable, "this is impossible, oh wait, no it isn't". Nice pictures though. Sorry if that sounds mean, not my intention.