The GTP Unofficial 2020 US Elections Thread

[UKMikey]

Trump has now launched his communications platform

I'm surprised he isn't charging people to look at it.

Meanwhile, on an actual social media platform...

 

[TB]

Depends on the hat.

Probably fit better on a tall, pointy, white one than on a baseball hat.

Just spit-ballin' here.

 

[TexRex]

Probably fit better on a tall, pointy, white one than on a baseball hat.

Just spit-ballin' here.

That's hood good.

Edit:

I'm surprised he isn't charging people to look at it.

Meanwhile, on an actual social media platform...

Related:

 

[EngieDiesel]

Greeeaaaat. He's out of office and I'm still going to have go another 4 years of hearing, "MAGA/KAG" ********.

Presuming the current champions of his cause still have the interest to keep doing so after the mainstream media finally gets sick of the clown act and fully shifts its focus elsewhere. I'm sure at least a few of the more loudmouthed ones will find some new bandwagons to jump onto between now and 2024, and Trump's ability to stay politically relevant will start to fall off quite a bit without them screaming at the cameras for him.

 

[TexRex]

 

[UKMikey]

Talk about bamboozling.

 

[Danoff]

I thought hanging chads were bad:

Now we've got wackos (including people with direct conflicts of interest) shining UV lights looking for creases, folds, lack of creases, fingerprints, weight, and apparently bamboo.

 

[UKMikey]

Those phony auditors are attempting to panda to their base.

 

[Danoff]

Those phony auditors are attempting to panda to their base.

Damn you! I was looking for a panda joke for like 5 minutes and gave up.

 

[UKMikey]

Damn you! I was looking for a panda joke for like 5 minutes and gave up.

It's all there in b&w. *eats, shoots and leaves*

 

[Danoff]

It's all there in b&w. *eats, shoots and leaves*

 

[Liquid]

I can't bear this.

 

[TexRex]

Those phony auditors are attempting to panda to their base.

 

[Darla Starch]

I can't bear this.

Finding suitable puns is a bit grizzly IIRC.

 

[Keef]

Finding suitable puns is a bit grizzly IIRC.

I don't know where you guys learned this but I never quite scratched that tree.

 

[Pupik]

Thanks to our dysfunctional democracy coupled with a 40% chance of kleptocracy, we're now the U.R.S.A.

Spoiler

I reached too far into the stars for that one

 

[Famine]

Yet another Kodiak moment in GTP punfests.

 

[Liquid]

The koalaty of these puns is diminishing...

 

[UKMikey]

I dunno for sure, but I may (in commencing this line of conversation) have made a boo-boo.

 

[JKgo]

All these puns are kind of overbearing. Keep them roaring, though.

 

[ROAD_DOGG33J]

https://www.npr.org/2021/05/06/9942...es-concerns-with-arizona-senate-audit-recount

Arizona "audit" may be violating federal laws.

 

[TexRex]

 

[TexRex]

 

[TexRex]

This feels like a joke. The Maricopa County, Arizona election audit--which is the third such audit in the county, though likely the first including UV lights, ballot thickness checks and examination for bamboo fibers--is purportedly being conducted on the grounds of the Crazy Times Carnival.

Legitimate fraud endermines confidence in the system, no doubt, but they are so desperate to find evidence of it.

 

[Joey D]

examination for bamboo fibers

God damn pandas trying to steal the election.

 

[Danoff]

God damn pandas trying to steal the election.

Pandas are well known thieves.

Trash pandas too...

 

[Jezza819]

Pandas are well known thieves.

Trash pandas too...

On a related note, The Rocket City Trash Pandas are our local minor league baseball team. They are an affiliate of the Los Angeles Angels. They were supposed to start play in the 2020 season but COVID wiped that out. Their opening night was this past Monday. We get free tickets where I work so I'm sure I will go out there to catch a few games this year.

 

[TexRex]

("Endermines"?)

 

[UKMikey]

God damn pandas trying to steal the election.

Must be some kind of a face-heel turn.

(Don't look at me... I used all the good panda jokes up on the previous page.)

 

[UKMikey]

More voter fraud.

https://www.thedailybeast.com/barry...on-behalf-of-his-missing-wife-suzanne-morphew

Five months after Suzanne Morphew vanished without a trace while out on a bike ride last Mother’s Day, the Chaffee County Clerk’s Office in Colorado received a bizarre notification: a mail-in ballot for the 2020 election had been submitted under her name.

When a Chaffee County sergeant went to the clerk’s office to check out the ballot, he saw that it had been handwritten and dated Oct. 15, 2020—and included the signature of her husband, Barry Lee Morphew, on the witness line.

But according to an arrest affidavit obtained by The Daily Beast, authorities did not question the 53-year-old dad about his alleged voter fraud until April 22, just days before he was charged with first-degree murder and a slew of other crimes in connection with his wife’s disappearance.

“I wanted Trump… to win,” Morphew told FBI agents when questioned about submitting his wife’s voting ballot. “I just thought, give him… another vote. I figured all these other guys are cheating.”