The Perfect Dump *A funny list*

I have to say that i am very surprised of the lasting power of this joke. I thought it was only going to be around for a week and it has been a month and a half. A very successful joke :thumbsup:
 
The Houdini Dump -- You go, then you stand up to flush, and the darn thing has disappeared. Where'd it go? Did it creep down the pipe? Did you dream the whole thing? Is it lurking out of sight? Should you wipe...maybe you should just to make sure you went. Should you flush? You'd better, because if you don't, you know it will reappear and smile at the next person who comes in.
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Dont you just love those. I I would just leave it. BTW talk about bringing up the old threads. :p
 
tsk, tsk...u forgot the dump that no human should ever have to live through...

The Second or Third World Country Dump:

it's a combination of the chili dump + machine gun + sound effect + the flu dump + the whole roll dump + the born again dump. it's primarily caused by inhaling the air in Pakistan or drinking foreign water or eating food in a 2nd or 3rd world country. the effects can last anywhere from a day after being immersed in the listed elements to well over a month if it's total immersion in pakistan
 
I'd forgotten about this post. Man, I have just one thing to add (kinda gross too).

The Erratic Fluidic dump - This dump is a combo between a chili dump, the tijuana trot dump, the machine-gun dump, the encore dump, and the flu dump. No-one knows what causes it, all we know is that it happens, you can't stop it, and you can tyr and hold it all you want; squeeze your cheeks as tight as they get, but it will still seep through because it's a fine liquid, which generally leaves a brown pin-stripe for you to see when you finally manage to sit down and relieve yourself.

:yuck: I used to get those all the time, but now I've learned that eating cheese makes them go away (far, far away...)
 
I usually get quite a few of those in a week...ones I don't usually get:
Beer Dump
Chili Dump
Mona Lisa Dump
Aborted Dump
Alfresco Dump
Tijuana Dump
Flu Dump
Encore Dump

I especially hate the splash backs. Enough about me.
 
The Ghost Dump. You find a huge turd when you enter the toilet, but nobody admits they left it there.

This is a great thread btw.. :lol:
 
You forgot

The Bowling Alley Dump - The kind where that odor creeps out of the bathroom and makes everyone nausiated enough to puke

The Second Wave Dump - The kind where you finished dunping and wiping you bottom then it hits you again

The Power Dump - The type where the dump comes out so fast it sprays toilet water on your butt. . .aka - The Wet-cheeks Dump

The Pop a Vessel in your forehead dump - the type that comes out and hurts so bad that you swear it is leaving you sideways. . .
 
Originally posted by Tomski
The Ghost Dump. You find a huge turd when you enter the toilet, but nobody admits they left it there.

This is a great thread btw.. :lol:
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The Ghost Dump - The type where you squeeze it out and swear there is a ton in the bowl, but when you look there is nothing. . . and you uses massive amounts of toilet paper to clean your bottom
 
Originally posted by miata13B
You forgot

The Second Wave Dump - The kind where you finished dunping and wiping you bottom then it hits you again

The Power Dump - The type where the dump comes out so fast it sprays toilet water on your butt. . .aka - The Wet-cheeks Dump
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Those two are there, just under different names. ;)
 
The Tequila dump - You see the worm floating around the bowl

The Mexician Food Dump - A League of its own. . .
 
Originally posted by milefile
The Burger King dump. You can set your watch by it. One hour after eating a whopper, you leave a whopper.
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Kinda like having a slider at Mcdoogalds - or better known as a Big Mac - 30 minutes flat and your blowing your back end up. . .


The Clean Dump - The kind where you look in the bowl and see it and wipe your arse and there is nothing there. . .
 
Originally posted by miata13B
The Clean Dump - The kind where you look in the bowl and see it and wipe your arse and there is nothing there. . .
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AKA the Immaculate Dump-ception.

Aren't every one of a dogs dumps like that? I envy that.
 
Originally posted by miata13B
The Clean Dump - The kind where you look in the bowl and see it and wipe your arse and there is nothing there. . .
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d00d. That is the perfect dump. That is the dump this whole dumpy thread is based on. d00d.
 
Originally posted by milefile
Aren't every one of a dogs dumps like that? I envy that.
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You would think through evolution we would get that trait somewhere along the line, but no. . . We gotta wipe. . . :(
 

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