Ok I´ll try to translate one I just got on email today and found it funny. After a long illness period, a woman dies and goes to heaven gates. While she stood there waiting to get in, she looked through the bars and saw her parents, friends and all the people who had died before her eating a marvelous dinner and having fun. When an Angel comes close she asks: -"What a beautiful place, how do I get in there?" - "I´ll say a word, if you spell it correctly you can get in, otherwise you´ll go straight to hell". "What´s the word?" she asks. -"LOVE" So she spells it correctly and goes through the gates. About a year later the angel asks her to watch the gates that day. Surprisingly, her husband shows up. -"Hi, what a surprise!" she says. "How are you?" - "Oh, I have been quite well since you died. I merried that nurse who took care of you, win the lottery and got millionare! I sold the house we used to live in and bouth a mansion. Me and my wife travelled the whole world. We were on vacation, and I went skiing today. I fell and knocked my head on a rock so here I am. How do I get in, honey?" - "I´ll say a word, if you spell it correctly you can get in, otherwise you´ll go straight to hell". He says: "Okay, what´s the word?" - "SCHWARZENEGGER"