My Story. (Warning: Long)
- Thread starter MistaX
- 101 comments
- 5,644 views
Well, I'm pretty surprised. Never imagined you've had it so rough.
I can definitely say I noticed a positive change in your attitude and appearance when we went to the auto-x compared to 'back in the day' when we went cruising in the Z28. 👍
I know from your point of view this will sound stupid, but I think that no matter how much you love a girl, or a particular car their just not worth taking your own life over. It's not always easy to adjust to changes, but you get used to everything over time.
I'm glad I helped with the finishing touches (
) so you can get the mustang out on the road. 
I can definitely say I noticed a positive change in your attitude and appearance when we went to the auto-x compared to 'back in the day' when we went cruising in the Z28. 👍
I know from your point of view this will sound stupid, but I think that no matter how much you love a girl, or a particular car their just not worth taking your own life over. It's not always easy to adjust to changes, but you get used to everything over time.
I'm glad I helped with the finishing touches (
) so you can get the mustang out on the road. 
Sakiale
(Banned)
- 2,274
Eh, your story sounds like mine, except I've only gotten to the 8th grade part, and I have a girlfriend in 8th grade who as far as I'm aware isn't emo (no offence) or any other psychological problems, and I have ADHD. I believe I'm depressed, but no one else thinks so and I don't want to be evaluated by a psychologist. My parents are always yelling and fighting with each other and with me. They really mean well but too often they just lose it. At least once a day. Also, the worst part, my girlfriend who I really feel like I need now, having just moved to California which devastated me, is still in New York.
I got great grades in K--5 grade, but that was all under my mom's effort. For 1--5 grade I changed schools from the local school to gifted program school, which was gay because all we did was learn learn learn. We NEVER did anything fun and rarely had a field trip. PLUS our test scores were apparently lower than my school in kindergarten. More than once a month I've had to stay up to 2 or 3 am to do or redo homework until it is A level. I got max score on state reading and math tests. In 6th grade, I got to go to school in Manhattan--more than an hour away by bicycle, subway, and sometimes bus. And walking. This was the Lucy Moses School of music. The kids there were really nice. This is when I started liking rap music and rock music, and 'the hood' and 'gangsta' stuff. That is one of the things I miss about New York city, the streets and the subways... the neighborhoods... but most of all, my friends. LMS was a pretty easy school, and I was able to scrape a B average in the academic area. Also my whole grade only had 11 kids, so it was better in focusing. Everyone claims that I'm really bad at group work (my parents and psychologists), but in this year and in 7th grade, I think that I'm okay at it, as I had done 3 major projects that were best-in-class. Also there was some fiasco involving the girl I had a crush on, but that's actually pretty irrelevant. Nearing the end of the year, I am allowed to take the entrance exam for Hunter College High School, arguably the best High School in NYC, and miraculously, get in. This is due to my 5th grade test scores. Well I suppose its really not that miraculous, because I'm pretty good at tests. HCHS is 7th--12th grade, and in 7th grade I go there. It is great, and I love the school. This is also, however the year that my mom gets a job, and my dad moves to California. This is a very, very bad thing for me, because it means that I have control of all the computers in the house. Every Friday and Saturday night, and even some weekdays, I wake up at night to play Runescape, go to GTP, and watch TV or porn. (Yeah, this is the time I start watching porn.) Personally I think that its not so bad because my friends all do it, but my parents don't agree. Speaking of friends, I haven't really gotten any friends in these 8 years. They were all just people to hang out with that you forget about later, or people that don't like me.
7th grade, there is this girl in my class that I really like. She is really quiet, and I think she's cute. Over the year I become her good friend, but 3/4 through, I decide that I don't actually have a crush on her and start crushing on this prettier, Japanese girl--who of course ends up hating me. Me and the first girl still remain friends, though.
Also this year, due to my computer things and my unknown ADHD and my mom's absence from 4:30, when I get home, to 7:00, and my dad being gone, and my mom being really tired when she got home, I don't do ANY of my homework. Maybe 40% is undone. And I got mugged. There was a huge string of muggings that year, and the school's near Harlem. Personally I don't think this affected me, but I'm sure some psychologist will think differently.
Well one of my friends this year lives in SoHo. His problems are similar to mine, academically at least. We start going to Best Buy in SoHo together, to play games, after school and on half days. I also start going to a game store to play in Flushing after or before my dentist appointments. My grades are Cs, Ds, and Fs. Even in Comm. Arts and P.E., I think I got C-minuses. My parents had to meet with the asssistant principal, I have a tutor for Latin (C-)provided by the school and a tutor for math (Failing and Ds) which costs $60 (maybe more, don't remember) an hour. My mentor from one of the school clubs tutors me in math also. And I start trying to write rap songs. Well, apparently due to my grades, we decide to move to Cali, at the same time my friend is moving there. We take a cross-country road trip to get there, however my friend lives 70 miles away from us.
After I realize that L.A. is big and there is no way for me to pull the same s**t I pulled in 7th grade, and that the atmosphere could never replace NYC, I'm pretty bummed. However going to Jr. LDC 2006 summer camp helped since it was fun, and I met a girl who supposedly is my friend but hasnt emailed me for ages. I have a crush on her now, but then I realize that I still really like the first girl, from 7th grade. I get her email from an old friend. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Anyway, I go to Chapparral middle school for 8th grade, where the kids are really mean. I suppose this is my fault; I was really pro-NY and got into fights with too many wrong people. I get really depressed, and every day, people that I don't even know come up to me and insult me, throw things at me, and make fun of me. Someone even impersonated me on AIM and got a whole lot more people pissed off. My person that I hang out with tells me that I'm 'in deep s**t... from everyone'. Yeah. True.
To boost my popularity, I start writing rap songs about New York, my mugging, etc. These are a huge success, and while life is still the same in half the time, the other half involves a lot of girls screaming and crowds of people around me. It feels good. I still write, once in a while. It's fun.
I meet this Mexican guy, Richie, who says he's a gangster. Personally I don't really believe him, but he's pretty cool. I walk and talk with him. He says I'm one of the few white kids for which he has any respect. He also writes rap songs, but most people say that mine are better. He claims to have won a lot of freestyle battles. I haven't tried any. In Hunter there was a club around it, but in L.A., Asians and white kids aren't supposed to like rap.
This is also the year I start forging signatures. Since my parents are being extra vigilant, the first time I get caught but not suspended. However...
At the end of the first sememster I move to Walnut to a real permanent house. I go to Suzanne Middle School. The kids are nicer, probably also cause I was nicer, but the school is hard. My mom requested a progress report. It shows all Cs and Ds, and panicking, I forge it. Once again I am not suspended, as they are not aware that this is the second time. Everyone does it. A few weeks pass and I'm failing Lang. Arts. My mom meets with the counselor. More than half my homework was not done. Now I'm getting Cs and Bs.
My mom is 'tipped off' to my ADHD by a page that I had done extra in science. I dont really get that, but yeah. I deny I have ADHD. Now I accept it. Psychology and hypnosis doesnt help..
I email my girl. She emails back. She is one of perhaps 2 or 3 people who actually ever answer my emails. Somehow, she becomes my girlfriend. I'm overjoyed. I still can't believe it.
I've never had the balls to actually attempt suicide, but I've planned it countless times. And run away from home at least 5 times. None for more than a day, and none overnight. As I said I don't have the balls.
However, I often serioulsly consider packing up my stuff and my clothes and biking back to New York. With my $550 Chinese New Year's money and savings, I know I could make it. Now, I'm stuck here.
I passed the application for the I.B. Program. I don't want it to end up like Hunter, with Fs and Ds and Cs, but I really fear it will. My mom wants me to either repeat 8th grade or take a break from school for a year and go pray at Buddhist temples in China to cure my ADHD. I believe in that, and would do it if I wasnt going to get laughed at for getting 'left back' or something when I came back.
I also wear black a lot but that's more cause I like it.
Also I should give you some religious background. My mom is Buddhist and I think she is really too caught up in it. She is always teaching me ancient Chinese values and stuff, which while good, I think she overdoes. She now seriously really thinks the media and games are evil, especially after the shooting at VA Tech.
I got great grades in K--5 grade, but that was all under my mom's effort. For 1--5 grade I changed schools from the local school to gifted program school, which was gay because all we did was learn learn learn. We NEVER did anything fun and rarely had a field trip. PLUS our test scores were apparently lower than my school in kindergarten. More than once a month I've had to stay up to 2 or 3 am to do or redo homework until it is A level. I got max score on state reading and math tests. In 6th grade, I got to go to school in Manhattan--more than an hour away by bicycle, subway, and sometimes bus. And walking. This was the Lucy Moses School of music. The kids there were really nice. This is when I started liking rap music and rock music, and 'the hood' and 'gangsta' stuff. That is one of the things I miss about New York city, the streets and the subways... the neighborhoods... but most of all, my friends. LMS was a pretty easy school, and I was able to scrape a B average in the academic area. Also my whole grade only had 11 kids, so it was better in focusing. Everyone claims that I'm really bad at group work (my parents and psychologists), but in this year and in 7th grade, I think that I'm okay at it, as I had done 3 major projects that were best-in-class. Also there was some fiasco involving the girl I had a crush on, but that's actually pretty irrelevant. Nearing the end of the year, I am allowed to take the entrance exam for Hunter College High School, arguably the best High School in NYC, and miraculously, get in. This is due to my 5th grade test scores. Well I suppose its really not that miraculous, because I'm pretty good at tests. HCHS is 7th--12th grade, and in 7th grade I go there. It is great, and I love the school. This is also, however the year that my mom gets a job, and my dad moves to California. This is a very, very bad thing for me, because it means that I have control of all the computers in the house. Every Friday and Saturday night, and even some weekdays, I wake up at night to play Runescape, go to GTP, and watch TV or porn. (Yeah, this is the time I start watching porn.) Personally I think that its not so bad because my friends all do it, but my parents don't agree. Speaking of friends, I haven't really gotten any friends in these 8 years. They were all just people to hang out with that you forget about later, or people that don't like me.
7th grade, there is this girl in my class that I really like. She is really quiet, and I think she's cute. Over the year I become her good friend, but 3/4 through, I decide that I don't actually have a crush on her and start crushing on this prettier, Japanese girl--who of course ends up hating me. Me and the first girl still remain friends, though.
Also this year, due to my computer things and my unknown ADHD and my mom's absence from 4:30, when I get home, to 7:00, and my dad being gone, and my mom being really tired when she got home, I don't do ANY of my homework. Maybe 40% is undone. And I got mugged. There was a huge string of muggings that year, and the school's near Harlem. Personally I don't think this affected me, but I'm sure some psychologist will think differently.
Well one of my friends this year lives in SoHo. His problems are similar to mine, academically at least. We start going to Best Buy in SoHo together, to play games, after school and on half days. I also start going to a game store to play in Flushing after or before my dentist appointments. My grades are Cs, Ds, and Fs. Even in Comm. Arts and P.E., I think I got C-minuses. My parents had to meet with the asssistant principal, I have a tutor for Latin (C-)provided by the school and a tutor for math (Failing and Ds) which costs $60 (maybe more, don't remember) an hour. My mentor from one of the school clubs tutors me in math also. And I start trying to write rap songs. Well, apparently due to my grades, we decide to move to Cali, at the same time my friend is moving there. We take a cross-country road trip to get there, however my friend lives 70 miles away from us.
After I realize that L.A. is big and there is no way for me to pull the same s**t I pulled in 7th grade, and that the atmosphere could never replace NYC, I'm pretty bummed. However going to Jr. LDC 2006 summer camp helped since it was fun, and I met a girl who supposedly is my friend but hasnt emailed me for ages. I have a crush on her now, but then I realize that I still really like the first girl, from 7th grade. I get her email from an old friend. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Anyway, I go to Chapparral middle school for 8th grade, where the kids are really mean. I suppose this is my fault; I was really pro-NY and got into fights with too many wrong people. I get really depressed, and every day, people that I don't even know come up to me and insult me, throw things at me, and make fun of me. Someone even impersonated me on AIM and got a whole lot more people pissed off. My person that I hang out with tells me that I'm 'in deep s**t... from everyone'. Yeah. True.
To boost my popularity, I start writing rap songs about New York, my mugging, etc. These are a huge success, and while life is still the same in half the time, the other half involves a lot of girls screaming and crowds of people around me. It feels good. I still write, once in a while. It's fun.
I meet this Mexican guy, Richie, who says he's a gangster. Personally I don't really believe him, but he's pretty cool. I walk and talk with him. He says I'm one of the few white kids for which he has any respect. He also writes rap songs, but most people say that mine are better. He claims to have won a lot of freestyle battles. I haven't tried any. In Hunter there was a club around it, but in L.A., Asians and white kids aren't supposed to like rap.
This is also the year I start forging signatures. Since my parents are being extra vigilant, the first time I get caught but not suspended. However...
At the end of the first sememster I move to Walnut to a real permanent house. I go to Suzanne Middle School. The kids are nicer, probably also cause I was nicer, but the school is hard. My mom requested a progress report. It shows all Cs and Ds, and panicking, I forge it. Once again I am not suspended, as they are not aware that this is the second time. Everyone does it. A few weeks pass and I'm failing Lang. Arts. My mom meets with the counselor. More than half my homework was not done. Now I'm getting Cs and Bs.
My mom is 'tipped off' to my ADHD by a page that I had done extra in science. I dont really get that, but yeah. I deny I have ADHD. Now I accept it. Psychology and hypnosis doesnt help..
I email my girl. She emails back. She is one of perhaps 2 or 3 people who actually ever answer my emails. Somehow, she becomes my girlfriend. I'm overjoyed. I still can't believe it.
I've never had the balls to actually attempt suicide, but I've planned it countless times. And run away from home at least 5 times. None for more than a day, and none overnight. As I said I don't have the balls.
However, I often serioulsly consider packing up my stuff and my clothes and biking back to New York. With my $550 Chinese New Year's money and savings, I know I could make it. Now, I'm stuck here.
I passed the application for the I.B. Program. I don't want it to end up like Hunter, with Fs and Ds and Cs, but I really fear it will. My mom wants me to either repeat 8th grade or take a break from school for a year and go pray at Buddhist temples in China to cure my ADHD. I believe in that, and would do it if I wasnt going to get laughed at for getting 'left back' or something when I came back.
I also wear black a lot but that's more cause I like it.
Also I should give you some religious background. My mom is Buddhist and I think she is really too caught up in it. She is always teaching me ancient Chinese values and stuff, which while good, I think she overdoes. She now seriously really thinks the media and games are evil, especially after the shooting at VA Tech.
- 1,573
- Famine's house.
- Milford_Cubicle
What an utterly mind blowing post, MistaX.
I may not know you but well done on posting that - I bet you feel 100 times better for sharing?
And good luck with Dana, I truly hope things work out. If they don't though, it's not worth killing yourself over. Life really does go on and there's so much more for a young guy like you to discover.
Good luck with everything.
I may not know you but well done on posting that - I bet you feel 100 times better for sharing?
And good luck with Dana, I truly hope things work out. If they don't though, it's not worth killing yourself over. Life really does go on and there's so much more for a young guy like you to discover.
Good luck with everything.
- 4,394
Wow - John I think you'll find you made the right decision in sharing your moving story with thie board - as we are a community that (as you can see) can offer a lot of support.
I wouldn't call you a bad driver, just unlucky and sometimes reckless. As someone else said, part of learning how to drive at the limits of a car is to exceed them once in a while. So drive cautiously in most areas but learn how to exceed them in the right areas and you'll do well for yourself.
I think Dana will come around when you show her that you are for real with your emotions - it seems like this is something you want to make a change in your life about. So since you are sincere about it, she will definitely notice and then probably return to you.
I'm praying for you!
I wouldn't call you a bad driver, just unlucky and sometimes reckless. As someone else said, part of learning how to drive at the limits of a car is to exceed them once in a while. So drive cautiously in most areas but learn how to exceed them in the right areas and you'll do well for yourself.
I think Dana will come around when you show her that you are for real with your emotions - it seems like this is something you want to make a change in your life about. So since you are sincere about it, she will definitely notice and then probably return to you.
I'm praying for you!
- 6,331
- Banbury, UK
- Uberbee
Wow John, whenever we spoke on LFS, I never thought for an instant it was this deep. Good work on actually making the post, I'm sure it's the start of a great comeback.
I wont go into a thousand and one words of how to sort your life out, I reckon you already know how.
Good luck.
I wont go into a thousand and one words of how to sort your life out, I reckon you already know how.
Good luck.
- 8,128
- 2 smacks past uranus
- Somebodyshootme
Wow, John. . . It sounds very familar what you are going through, but odds and ends paved their own path in my life.
It is funny I had that "brickwall" relationship once, her name was Mara. . . This was back in 1997, and boy can I tell you there has not been a connection like that with another woman since. To make it short, I grew disgusted with her in the last 6 months we were together. It was a heart wrenching experience because I did love her and in many ways I still do love her. It is 10 years later now. It did not work out in the end and then next 6 months to 2 years after we broke up boy was I a mess. The hardest part was actually the first two months. I found myself going through so many mood swings that I could not keep myself together.
Then I found something very interesting in my life. I started to really work on cars that I had. Not just wrenching with my dad to maintain a car, but to actually modifiy cars with my friends. Thus, the whole whacked out notion of a miata I once held very dear to me. Most of us know the destiny of that miata and those that don't I really don't feel like going into it.
I realized though that placing all my energy on one thing to keep me going was a wrong move. I placed everything on Mara when I had her and I placed everything on my miata when I had her. The end results of both for me was total destruction.
About a year ago I got a contact from Mara on Myspace. I had not seen her since 1999, nor talked to her at all. I totally shut myself off from her after we broke up. Hindsight, I was very scared to face this world alone and did not think I can. I still have this feeling every once in a while. I kept pushing on though. It was the only thing to do. I would be lying if I said I never thought of ending it all.
In my journey since though I must say that I have met some incredible people, but they passed. I never expected anyone to stay in my life forever. I realized that really fast and treasured the times I had and will have with others.
I don't have any answers for you. I really don't have any answers for myself. We all deal with our own problems, but it is cases such as yours from what I see and mine that self-destructive habits will do no good. You may be alone in the future, you may not be alone in the future. I can't predict anything, but I do know something. Life is as fun as you make it or as horrible as you want.
It is funny I had that "brickwall" relationship once, her name was Mara. . . This was back in 1997, and boy can I tell you there has not been a connection like that with another woman since. To make it short, I grew disgusted with her in the last 6 months we were together. It was a heart wrenching experience because I did love her and in many ways I still do love her. It is 10 years later now. It did not work out in the end and then next 6 months to 2 years after we broke up boy was I a mess. The hardest part was actually the first two months. I found myself going through so many mood swings that I could not keep myself together.
Then I found something very interesting in my life. I started to really work on cars that I had. Not just wrenching with my dad to maintain a car, but to actually modifiy cars with my friends. Thus, the whole whacked out notion of a miata I once held very dear to me. Most of us know the destiny of that miata and those that don't I really don't feel like going into it.
I realized though that placing all my energy on one thing to keep me going was a wrong move. I placed everything on Mara when I had her and I placed everything on my miata when I had her. The end results of both for me was total destruction.
About a year ago I got a contact from Mara on Myspace. I had not seen her since 1999, nor talked to her at all. I totally shut myself off from her after we broke up. Hindsight, I was very scared to face this world alone and did not think I can. I still have this feeling every once in a while. I kept pushing on though. It was the only thing to do. I would be lying if I said I never thought of ending it all.
In my journey since though I must say that I have met some incredible people, but they passed. I never expected anyone to stay in my life forever. I realized that really fast and treasured the times I had and will have with others.
I don't have any answers for you. I really don't have any answers for myself. We all deal with our own problems, but it is cases such as yours from what I see and mine that self-destructive habits will do no good. You may be alone in the future, you may not be alone in the future. I can't predict anything, but I do know something. Life is as fun as you make it or as horrible as you want.
- 13,640
- North Jersey
- MistaX1
Thanks again, everyone, for your support. It really does make a huge difference.
I hadn't expect the thread to go this well. So I'm kind of out of things to say besides "Thanks".
TM: I'm not expecting nor do I want anyone to treat me differently. I'm happy with things as they are, here.
GTP is important to me, because while I was going through hell, I was "here"
Maybe that's why I still miss HMRCWG, 5 years after it's gone. It was an escape, generally.
I've said a few times in the past that I hate GTP, but I really don't. Nor do I hate everyone.
Dan: When we went to the auto-x it was my first time going out and doing something in a really, really long time. I needed it, really. Thanks for that. Even needed to get lost in Korean town.
I hadn't expect the thread to go this well. So I'm kind of out of things to say besides "Thanks".
TM: I'm not expecting nor do I want anyone to treat me differently. I'm happy with things as they are, here.
GTP is important to me, because while I was going through hell, I was "here"
Maybe that's why I still miss HMRCWG, 5 years after it's gone. It was an escape, generally.
I've said a few times in the past that I hate GTP, but I really don't. Nor do I hate everyone.
Dan: When we went to the auto-x it was my first time going out and doing something in a really, really long time. I needed it, really. Thanks for that. Even needed to get lost in Korean town.
- 834
- 13,640
- North Jersey
- MistaX1
I made a decent attempt to get Dana to participate in this thread. But she won't.
"There's nothing I can say there that I can't tell you on the phone, or in person"
and
"I don't feel comfortable saying these things in front of an audience. Maybe if I knew the people it'd be a different story"
So I'm a wee bit disappointed that she won't, but it's understandable and we agree to disagree.
She pointed out that I had left a few things out in what I wrote. In example, the main cause of why she wanted to leave me. Me not being emotional is just a minor part.
It's something I'm currently not comfortable with saying here, but within the next few days, maybe I will. I do need to say it.
"There's nothing I can say there that I can't tell you on the phone, or in person"
and
"I don't feel comfortable saying these things in front of an audience. Maybe if I knew the people it'd be a different story"
So I'm a wee bit disappointed that she won't, but it's understandable and we agree to disagree.
She pointed out that I had left a few things out in what I wrote. In example, the main cause of why she wanted to leave me. Me not being emotional is just a minor part.
It's something I'm currently not comfortable with saying here, but within the next few days, maybe I will. I do need to say it.
- 10,309
- San Francisco, CA
- Vasco506
- Vasc0
I know it would've taken a lot of guts to say all that on here John, and I can see you know you'll pull through it eventually. I thought you had had a tough childhood, but I didn't think it was like this.
Yeah I feel like an arsehole having paid you out so much on msn now...
Yeah I feel like an arsehole having paid you out so much on msn now...
- 17,865
- 509
John,
Well... damn, this explains a bit. Bravo on posting it and having it not come across as a sob story either (I mean that in a good way
)
And now I understand why you were so damned attached to that Camaro. I'll apologize for the jives about it back in the MSN world.
About your story, I can relate a little in areas, but not nearly as rough a deal. I spent 2 years on Wellbutrin and have gone through a few counselors. Some other issues here and there, like being the socially inept kid, and then developing a fascination with driving. Got frustrated, would go drive. Wanted to think - drive time, etc.
Works wonders at times... though something deeper needs to come along eventually. Mine was a wonderful girl that I am now married to; helps me get through the crap of life at times. Another bit was religion, but that varies from person to person so much.
One thing I'll say is it takes time to get things sorted out. Hell, took me nearly 12 years to get around to finally dealing with my mother's death properly... so just stick with it.
Feel free to hit me up on MSN, though I very randomly there (despite being logged in 24/7) so it might be a bit before a response if you do.
Keep at it, and again, bravo for the post. Some grand courage there I would say.
Peace, Cody
Well... damn, this explains a bit. Bravo on posting it and having it not come across as a sob story either (I mean that in a good way
)And now I understand why you were so damned attached to that Camaro. I'll apologize for the jives about it back in the MSN world.
About your story, I can relate a little in areas, but not nearly as rough a deal. I spent 2 years on Wellbutrin and have gone through a few counselors. Some other issues here and there, like being the socially inept kid, and then developing a fascination with driving. Got frustrated, would go drive. Wanted to think - drive time, etc.
Works wonders at times... though something deeper needs to come along eventually. Mine was a wonderful girl that I am now married to; helps me get through the crap of life at times. Another bit was religion, but that varies from person to person so much.
One thing I'll say is it takes time to get things sorted out. Hell, took me nearly 12 years to get around to finally dealing with my mother's death properly... so just stick with it.
Feel free to hit me up on MSN, though I very randomly there (despite being logged in 24/7) so it might be a bit before a response if you do.
Keep at it, and again, bravo for the post. Some grand courage there I would say.
Peace, Cody
- 28,409
- Glasgow
- GTP_Mars
I don't blame her for not wanting to post here. No offense intended, but it wouldn't be a particularly pleasant way to introduce yourself to an online community. Suffice it to say, so long as you guys are talking about your problems with each other, then who types what on the web doesn't make a great deal of difference to your relationship.
Totally agree... 👍
- 12,486
- CCS
- GTP_Diego
I have to say at first it would sound great if my wife and I shared more things, but when you spent time with someone, and that someone is part of your life, it's always good to have some stuff for yourself. Keeps me sane.
Something along the lines of opposites attract. My wife enjoys dancing, and I don't. I enjoy GTP, cars and GT4, my wife doesn't. I like heavy metal, drum & bass and 80s music, my wife likes Avril Lavigne *pukes*, Hilary Duff and similar crap. It's just an example, but it's good to have different tastes and some sort of activity where you can be alone. I have a friend who has the most miserable relationship because he's wanted his girlfriend to like everything he does (granted, she lacks personality), but now there's nothing the guy can do on his own because he always has the girlfriend trailing behind... to the point that I've nicknamed her 'the parasite'.
offence*
Something along the lines of opposites attract. My wife enjoys dancing, and I don't. I enjoy GTP, cars and GT4, my wife doesn't. I like heavy metal, drum & bass and 80s music, my wife likes Avril Lavigne *pukes*, Hilary Duff and similar crap. It's just an example, but it's good to have different tastes and some sort of activity where you can be alone. I have a friend who has the most miserable relationship because he's wanted his girlfriend to like everything he does (granted, she lacks personality), but now there's nothing the guy can do on his own because he always has the girlfriend trailing behind... to the point that I've nicknamed her 'the parasite'.
offence*
- 17,865
- 509
I have to say at first it would sound great if my wife and I shared more things, but when you spent time with someone, and that someone is part of your life, it's always good to have some stuff for yourself. Keeps me sane.
Something along the lines of opposites attract. My wife enjoys dancing, and I don't. I enjoy GTP, cars and GT4, my wife doesn't. I like heavy metal, drum & bass and 80s music, my wife likes Avril Lavigne *pukes*, Hilary Duff and similar crap. It's just an example, but it's good to have different tastes and some sort of activity where you can be alone. I have a friend who has the most miserable relationship because he's wanted his girlfriend to like everything he does (granted, she lacks personality), but now there's nothing the guy can do on his own because he always has the girlfriend trailing behind... to the point that I've nicknamed her 'the parasite'.
The Truth.
I find this is the case with alot of couples that have been together for a bit, and with my wife and I. You have similar interests, and the completely different ones. She likes country, and I can hardly stand it. Taste in cars, etc etc. Keeps you from losing some sense of identity of self.
But at the same time, its important to have things you do together as well. Some zen process to finding the perfect balance I guess.
- 2,343
- Atlanta, GA
- WallRunner51
Congrats to you for pulling up the strength to say all of that to us (gtp, half the people looking for gt4 tips on the internet, etc.), and now I think I understand why you acted crazy in those MSN convos. that I never get invited to anymore
From,
Chris.
From,
Chris.
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