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- ScottPuss20
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If a girl is trying to be nice, that doesn't mean she's flirting with you is it?
If a girl is trying to be nice, that doesn't mean she's flirting with you is it?
NoAre you flirting with every single person you're kind to during the course of a day?![]()
So an update on my relationship with this girl: I'm not in the friendzone anymore I think. She came over and we watched a movie and she sat on my lap for most of it. I'm still kicking myself for not kissing her though...
Err...
Good luck then...
Do you guys do that or just end all communication with each other forever?
Agreed. It might seem pretty creepy or like your usual friendship thing, depending on how things went down.Depends on how the relationship ends. I do that because it's in my nature. Most of my female friends are my ex gf.
Agreed. It might seem pretty creepy or like your usual friendship thing, depending on how things went down.
However, there might be some issues with an eventual new girlfriend. Mine wouldn't be too thrilled if I kept in touch with my exes - and I don't think I'd be too happy if she did, either. And there's one particular girl in my past that just... You know, has the kind of 'qualities' that make a guy do stupid things, no matter how bad of a human being she is. Ought to stay away from that kind of ex, definitely.
In other news, February's getting tough. Gotta think of something for Valentine's and our anniversary, which happens to be on the 22nd. Don't just want to go grab dinner at a nice place, that's so cliché![]()
Yeah, that's going to be awesome!Take her to the Nürburgring in your Smart. That ought to spice things up![]()
What do you guys think about caring for an ex, like you won't be getting back but still like to ask if she's alright and whatnot..
Do you guys do that or just end all communication with each other forever?
Change your mindset, by sheer will if you must. You are afraid of failing because in your mind, each time you talk to a woman there is some endgame or goal you must reach...or you fail. Try to talk for the sake of talking, the enjoyment of conversation, the same as you would a work or school male peer. Start small. Say hello to women whenever you can. Hold doors and smile for them. Help out a little old lady with something. So long as your end goal is simply to talk, you can't be rejected. Do this for as long as it takes for you to get comfortable, months maybe, and then things will start to fall into place. 👍I've got a fear of rejection so everytime I talk to a girl I always get nervous and my words start stuttering lol it's painfull. Basically why I've been single my whole life.
If she sat on your lap for 2 hours and you didn't kiss her, I'm going to say you're still in the friendzone. She's also probably starting to question if you like girls at this point, especially if you didn't have wood for the whole 2 hoursSo an update on my relationship with this girl: I'm not in the friendzone anymore I think. She came over and we watched a movie and she sat on my lap for most of it. I'm still kicking myself for not kissing her though...
I'm just taking it slow with this girl.Change your mindset, by sheer will if you must. You are afraid of failing because in your mind, each time you talk to a woman there is some endgame or goal you must reach...or you fail. Try to talk for the sake of talking, the enjoyment of conversation, the same as you would a work or school male peer. Start small. Say hello to women whenever you can. Hold doors and smile for them. Help out a little old lady with something. So long as your end goal is simply to talk, you can't be rejected. Do this for as long as it takes for you to get comfortable, months maybe, and then things will start to fall into place. 👍
If she sat on your lap for 2 hours and you didn't kiss her, I'm going to say you're still in the friendzone. She's also probably starting to question if you like girls at this point, especially if you didn't have wood for the whole 2 hours. The longer you wait, the more of a chance there is she'll run across someone else she likes who is willing to pull the trigger.
I can dig that, but IMHO you are missing the signs that she doesn't want to take it slow. Unless you guys are 11 and prepubescent, a girl sitting on your lap means she wants to be more intimate with you. Not intimate as in sex necessarily, but she's looking for something more physical, otherwise she'd be sitting on the other end of the couch, not in your lap. You said she's shy right? So she's communicating with her body language she wants to go to the next level and waiting for you to make the next move. I'd hate to see you on here in a week or two saying, "I'm sad now guys, I haven't talked to her for a week and I just heard from her friend that she's dating someone else". Try not to let your fear get the better of you. She's given you an open door, you just have to walk through. 👍I'm just taking it slow with this girl.
I'll make a move next time.I can dig that, but IMHO you are missing the signs that she doesn't want to take it slow. Unless you guys are 11 and prepubescent, a girl sitting on your lap means she wants to be more intimate with you. Not intimate as in sex necessarily, but she's looking for something more physical, otherwise she'd be sitting on the other end of the couch, not in your lap. You said she's shy right? So she's communicating with her body language she wants to go to the next level and waiting for you to make the next move. I'd hate to see you on here in a week or two saying, "I'm sad now guys, I haven't talked to her for a week and I just heard from her friend that she's dating someone else". Try not to let your fear get the better of you. She's given you an open door, you just have to walk through. 👍
I can dig that, but IMHO you are missing the signs that she doesn't want to take it slow. Unless you guys are 11 and prepubescent, a girl sitting on your lap means she wants to be more intimate with you. Not intimate as in sex necessarily, but she's looking for something more physical, otherwise she'd be sitting on the other end of the couch, not in your lap. You said she's shy right? So she's communicating with her body language she wants to go to the next level and waiting for you to make the next move. I'd hate to see you on here in a week or two saying, "I'm sad now guys, I haven't talked to her for a week and I just heard from her friend that she's dating someone else". Try not to let your fear get the better of you. She's given you an open door, you just have to walk through. 👍
Make sure you actually do it this timeI'll make a move next time.
She's so 🤬 hot too!![]()
Make sure you actually do it this time![]()
This weekendOk, I think I get that
Now, how close is "next time" and what can you do to get it even closer![]()
Let me share a little story so you know where I'm coming from. I met a girl in the first year of Junior High whom I'll call Christine (because that was her name). She was stunning, for 12 that is, with long brown hair, big brown eyes, pouty lips, an angel's disposition and a devil's bodyShe's so 🤬 hot too!![]()
It's not that I'm shy, it's that she is shy and I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. Its hard trying to be with a shy girl...Let me share a little story so you know where I'm coming from. I met a girl in the first year of Junior High whom I'll call Christine (because that was her name). She was stunning, for 12 that is, with long brown hair, big brown eyes, pouty lips, an angel's disposition and a devil's body. Every boy was dying for her including me. But I was painfully shy around girls at that point and I figured I had no chance with her so I just admired her from afar.
In grade 8 and 9 we had a couple of classes together and we did end up talking and getting to know each other a bit in school. Turns out she was very sweet, very down to earth and not stuck up at all. In grade 9 we had our first period class together, Mr. Thorburn's math class, and she sat in front of me. One morning she turned around and said, "Johnny will you go with me to the Sadie Hawkins Dance? For those of you that aren't aware, that's a dance where the girls ask the boys to go with them. I was flabbergasted, completely caught off guard and on the spot I came up with this brilliant response. "I can't, I have a girlfriend"
Which was a total lie.
And now I was caught, and had to explain how I had a girlfriend and she didn't know who she was. I got away with it, so I thought, because we had moved out of the school area, but I chose to stay in the same school system and bus myself in. So I explained that she went to another school, blah blah blah. I just couldn't bring myself to say yes, I was too shy, too scared. I kicked myself about it for days, for weeks, but kept it to myself, although I still think about it to this day.
She moved away at the end of that school year but ended up marrying a guy from our highschool. Fast forward 14 years to our tenth high school reunion and who is there but Christine and Aldo, her husband. We chatted, we laughed and then she asked me to dance with her. I said yes without thinking and we got up on the dance floor and she says, "Finally, after 14 years you dance with me!" And we had a great laugh about it.
Turns out, she knew how shy I was, but she liked me and thought that the Sadie Hawkins dance was the perfect thing for her to get me over the hump. She knew I didn't have a girlfriend too as it turns out and she said I was, "shaking like a leaf", which I was. She also said she was devastated too because it took all her courage to ask me, and she ended up not going to the dance.
I eventually overcame my shyness through sheer willpower. Beating myself up over it and just finally saying one day, no more, and working on it bit by bit. Any advice you see here is from that experience, because I do understand how painful and overwhelming shyness can be. I also understand how crushing the regrets can be when that shyness holds you back from doing what you want to do and being who you want to be.![]()
da quoteShe came over and we watched a movie and she sat on my lap for most of it.
da other quoteshe is shy and I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable.
She sits in your lap while watching a movie and you don't even try to kiss her and you're worried about making her uncomfortable...after she sat in your lap for a move...and she's the shy one?It's not that I'm shy, it's that she is shy and I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. Its hard trying to be with a shy girl...![]()
Maybe it's him who is shy, and him who is uncomfortable? I'm pretty sure anyone knows what to do when something like that happens.k
We have this:
And then this:
Never heard about a shy girl sitting on a dude's lap unless she's on to something.
So..
Weekend (ASAP). Go for it. No excuses.
So, after wresteling back and forth for 4 months of friendship, I finally overcame the barrier and I'm now in a relationship. I was with her on the 30th of Dcember, and that was the turning point since we haven't seen eachother for a long time which is wierd because we live 20km away, which is insignificant.
Anyway, I am a very very happy person right now!