Depression and Anxiety Thread

  • Thread starter JohnBM01
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JohnBM01
Well, it happened. Earlier tonight, I had an anxiety attack. I forgot to add a new roll of paper towels after rolling off the last pieces, and as I was reminded to change the paper towel roll, I had an absolute panic attack. I felt my body feeling week and my eyes beginning to water. Afterwards, I returned to my room crying and screaming. My mom came in to console me and help me get over my anxiety attack. I felt better a half an hour later. It was the culmination of the mindset of being perfect, responsible, and mindful that drove me to have an anxiety attack.

This thread I created regarded depression until it was changed up to a discussion of depression and anxiety. Some of us get anxious. My example explained here shows all of us can be vulnerable in the wake of an anxiety attack. If anything, try not to stress yourself too much or think too much about something negatively. Most of all, get help any way you can from your support system (even if your support system is yourself).


Don't let depression or anxiety win.
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Sorry to hear of your episode, John.

Such an odd situation to trigger such a thing. Have you diagnosed a cause? Other than the loo roll running out, of course? Was it a breathing issue?

Indeed, I believe it was the late Kikie that reared the subject of anxiety in this thread. I’ve been, thankfully, avoiding anxiety for many years. Depression however is something I must always keep at bay.

If you’re feeling residual effects and want to hash it out, feel free to drop me message if there’s anything you want to get out of your system. It’s nice to hear you had your mum’s support.

As a collective we can better deal with these occurrences.
 
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It was a combination of things. Part of it is trying to be a perfectionist, part of it was just me losing my mind. Just can't really pinpoint such a thing as a root cause. And by the way... it involved paper towels, not toilet paper, W3HS.

I feel I sometimes seem a broken record or always saying the same thing over and over again, but this is why I say we are all in the same fight together. We need each other to show we are not alone in our episodes with depression and/or anxiety. There's going to be a point where we reach our breaking point. Something is going to trigger those emotions deep within us. I still feel a bit down, but I'm okay for now.

By the way, I'm sad to learn of what happened to kikie in regards to this topic.
 
I always tend to be nervous often times. I felt it was awful when you have both depression and anxiety working in tandem against you. It can be Hell on Earth. So make sure to get yourself right and get some help if dealing with depression and/or anxiety.

And as always... do not let depression and/or anxiety win.
 
I had another depressive episode recently. This time, I wasn't screaming in disappointment. It was just uncontrollable tears and feeling worthless. Depression and anxiety hit hard, but we have to get help when we can. The worst case is that you end up in crisis and end up hurting yourself or someone else. So get help when you can and try to find ways to cope.
 
Hang in there, @JohnBM01. Sorry to hear of your turn.

I was close to emotional breakdown this morning while readying for work. I was in shock from recent news.
It took me all morning to pull myself together; I left work and took stock.
Much better now that the shock has worn off. Still a bit upset but I’m glad it’s not depression.
 
Some people are just prone to these patterns of thinking and being. Lifestyle changes are pretty difficult but would help, in my case it's been real.
 
It is now Fall/Autumn in the Northern Hemisphere. For some people, that means those with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) may have to start practicing light therapy. Hopefully you all are doing well. Don't get submerged in depression and/or anxiety if you can. Be sure to get help if you are in crisis.
 
JohnBM01
It is now Fall/Autumn in the Northern Hemisphere. For some people, that means those with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) may have to start practicing light therapy. Hopefully you all are doing well. Don't get submerged in depression and/or anxiety if you can. Be sure to get help if you are in crisis.
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You all have my ear, either publicly, or private.

I’m just a message away if anyone is in need.

Hopefully I never get that message because that tells me that, all things told, nobody needs my help. Ideally.

However, if a message comes my way then I know somebody needs to be heard. That’s why I’m listening.

I’m well versed in anxiety and depression at this point in life, and will not hesitate to share and help in any way I can.
 
After months of trying to letting go and move on, I now come to the realization that I can't let go of the past and it's hurting me big time. No amount of meds and alcohols can bury that.
At the same time, I just can't see any other way than living with this. I'm scared because it really feels like I'm slowly going down on a slippery slope and I can't stop. I don't have thoughts of suicide but I just don't have the will to make my life better.

Talk about feeling like a huge loser. I'm sorry to anyone that feels like I'm invalidating what they experience or feel because I don't think my problem is that big. There's a lot of things in my mind, too much that it feels heavy to talk about it.

I just hope anyone here who is suffering, that they are feeling better or at least on the right path.
 
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GTboyz
After months of trying to letting go and move on, I now come to the realization that I can't let go of the past and it's hurting me big time. No amount of meds and alcohols can bury that.
At the same time, I just can't see any other way than living with this. I'm scared because it really feels like I'm slowly going down on a slippery slope and I can't stop. I don't have thoughts of suicide but I just don't have the will to make my life better.

Talk about feeling like a huge loser. I'm sorry to anyone that feels like I'm invalidating what they experience or feel because I don't think my problem is that big. There's a lot of things in my mind, too much that it feels heavy to talk about it.

I just hope anyone here who is suffering, that they are feeling better or at least on the right path.
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Ive tried burying things I can sympathise a lot with what you are saying, there is no delete button for thinking but ive found a volume control for it. I wanted to share how Ive been coping with ASD in the hope that it my be of some benefit to others. My mind can take me to bad places with repeating thought patterns that are triggered by just being around people. There are coping mechanisms that we adopt when our thinking becomes a burden these can be either negative or positive as you have alluded to substances don't help. My old coping mechanisms could cause a negative feedback to develop because I would start doing avoidance tactics or self medicating. Ive embraced what is wrong with me and integrated it I dont feel a stigma anymore which reduces a lot of the burden of self blame. The method Ive been using is fairly straight forward I get out into green spaces, and take myself out of my head completely. It's as easy as standing still in a green space with the sun on your skin doing slow breaths and focussing on on the wind through the trees or bird song. The incessant chatter of the mind eventually subsides, and you end up in an empty head space as you move into an observation rather than processing mode. At first the silence / tranquility can be interupted by the old thought rhythms coming back, dont fight them let them play out and go back to the sounds or sights immediately around you and it will pull you back again. It's incremental but slipping into observational mode and closing down repeating thoughts starts to stick more and more and it becomes like a comfy pair of slippers the more you do it. The longer you spend in the moment in observation mode the more you come to realise you are not in the past anymore, and what is dragging you down is an echo albeit a persistent one. No matter whether you are up or down mood is not fixed and the possibility of what tomorrow can be is not pre-determined by the past. Below is one of my favourite places to get out of my head. Nature is truly restorative many of the plants and trees give out chemicals that reduce blood pressure, stress, and anxiety with every breath you are getting a benefit. At least 15 minutes of sunshine, and slow breathing mindfulness can build up your resilience for a full day. What im discovering is the negativity will always be somewhere in the memory, but the more you practice resilience the less it bothers you. A good nights sleep is also hugely beneficial I only drink coffee in a morning as it doesn't leave the body quickly, its always good for your bio rhythm if you sleep at the same time every day. There's no pressure to change, it just happens so don't expect an epiphany just chip away with a daily routine, and little by little change will happen for you, anything is possible.
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evldave333
Ive tried burying things I can sympathise a lot with what you are saying, there is no delete button for thinking but ive found a volume control for it. I wanted to share how Ive been coping with ASD in the hope that it my be of some benefit to others. My mind can take me to bad places with repeating thought patterns that are triggered by just being around people. There are coping mechanisms that we adopt when our thinking becomes a burden these can be either negative or positive as you have alluded to substances don't help. My old coping mechanisms could cause a negative feedback to develop because I would start doing avoidance tactics or self medicating. Ive embraced what is wrong with me and integrated it I dont feel a stigma anymore which reduces a lot of the burden of self blame. The method Ive been using is fairly straight forward I get out into green spaces, and take myself out of my head completely. It's as easy as standing still in a green space with the sun on your skin doing slow breaths and focussing on on the wind through the trees or bird song. The incessant chatter of the mind eventually subsides, and you end up in an empty head space as you move into an observation rather than processing mode. At first the silence / tranquility can be interupted by the old thought rhythms coming back, dont fight them let them play out and go back to the sounds or sights immediately around you and it will pull you back again. It's incremental but slipping into observational mode and closing down repeating thoughts starts to stick more and more and it becomes like a comfy pair of slippers the more you do it. The longer you spend in the moment in observation mode the more you come to realise you are not in the past anymore, and what is dragging you down is an echo albeit a persistent one. No matter whether you are up or down mood is not fixed and the possibility of what tomorrow can be is not pre-determined by the past. Below is one of my favourite places to get out of my head. Nature is truly restorative many of the plants and trees give out chemicals that reduce blood pressure, stress, and anxiety with every breath you are getting a benefit. At least 15 minutes of sunshine, and slow breathing mindfulness can build up your resilience for a full day. What im discovering is the negativity will always be somewhere in the memory, but the more you practice resilience the less it bothers you. A good nights sleep is also hugely beneficial I only drink coffee in a morning as it doesn't leave the body quickly, its always good for your bio rhythm if you sleep at the same time every day. There's no pressure to change, it just happens so don't expect an epiphany just chip away with a daily routine, and little by little change will happen for you, anything is possible. View attachment 1196984
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Thank you, I'll give this a try.
 
For the past week my social anxiety has gotten really bad honestly. I keep felling nauseated doing anything in public. :(
 
Casey
For the past week my social anxiety has gotten really bad honestly. I keep felling nauseated doing anything in public. :(
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So sorry to hear that, I used to get knots in my stomach on my way to work it's no fun at all. You are not alone in feeling this way, and are doing the right thing by sharing the burden. You can mitigate some of the feelings with deep slow breathing, and focussing on small details around you when in these situations. It's possible to be biologically primed to feel this way by genetics or memory of past situations, this turns on gene's that trigger the fight or flight response. Slow breathing is the easiest way to bring the stress levels down if you can't avoid what triggers these feelings. If you can, make a time or space each day to bring down your anxiety levels by doing something that relaxes you. I find being in nature / sunshine really helps me.
 
JohnBM01
If anything, try not to stress yourself too much or think too much about something negatively. Most of all, get help any way you can from your support system (even if your support system is yourself).
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Originally I’ve written a response at length to this tidbit here, but some days ago I’ve deleted it out of fear for the potential risks of self-disclosure, and I’ve forgotten what I wrote precisely, but seeing as today is the World Mental Health Day, I’ll just summarize what I wrote in the deleted draft, and concur with what @JohnBM01 said in the above snippet. It seems to be something that we should all have been well aware of already, but in fact it’s not. I know for one that sometimes I still fall prey to thoughts of self-loathing, and sometimes I still interpret others’ sayings more than what they actually meant. But it’s worth remembering that more often than not the things that we consider others to be implying are actually magnitudes higher/worse than what actually crossed their minds and are deliberately intended. Besides, even if the people actually intended the meaning that’s in your mind, so what? Continuing to fixate on the negative thought isn’t gonna do you any favours; if my experience is anything to go by, it’s just gonna make you a lot more demotivated in life, and maybe even more timid in getting the thing done. So just do your conscientious bit, and I’d say that’s already good enough.
 
I’ve been using cannabis medicinally, in part to subdue alcoholism. I ran out of the strain that I use and others have been ineffective.
Alcohol being a natural depressant, my serotonin levels have taken a large hit after a week of daily drinking.
Grrrrrr… I’m a miserable git today.
 
Today (November 4) is a sad anniversary- the passing of my grandmother. Losing a loved one can seriously bring depression and anxiety in your life, especially considering how much that someone mattered in your life. My grandmother molded me and my family. Her passing away back in 2017 left a void in most of our lives. I even suffered an infection days or a week after she died. Always remember that people will come and go in your life. Cherish your friends and family because you'll never know when they'll be gone.


Stay in the fight against depression and anxiety, and we're all in this together. Don't let depression or anxiety win.
 
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If you feel trapped in a corner, hopeless, worthless, or for lack of a better term- hit rock bottom... get whatever help you can. It can be tough to remind yourself that you are special and loved. Maybe surround yourself with more supporting people or go to a place where you feel happier if you have to. Just don't feel you are stuck in a downward spiral with absolutely no hope of recovering. Most demons can be overcome and can be bested.


As always, don't let depression or anxiety win.
 
HenrySwanson
That's interesting. Do you have a "rebound" effect of the depression worsening when it wears off?
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I do feel a bit muted if I go a while without a dose. I lose focus quickly too, and to keep focused is the main reason I take it.

As a teen I abused cannabis, not really knowing how to use it properly. I became a stoner with heavy use and it contributed to a psychosis back in ‘08.

I’m much more aware of its properties and how to administer it for the most benefit these days.

The amount I take daily is about 0.1g. It’s moderately recreational as I do enjoy an hour long buzz after a dose, but once that fades away I can still attend to my business with added focus and perseverance.

I’ve mixed it a few times with some beers and the alcohol nullified it’s longer lasting effects after the initial high. It’s probably the closest thing I’ll had to a ‘clinical’ alcohol suppressant.
 
I don't believe in New Year's resolutions. My version, though, is focusing my energy on certain things for the new year. So I want to focus more on mental health and mood. I feel I will be most productive if my mental health is intact and if I am a position where my mood will not prevent me from being successful. I suggest you all try to improve your own mood and mental health to avert things like depression and anxiety.


Don't let depression or anxiety win.
 
"New year, new start. Don't let last year's shortcomings dictate your future. Make the most of the new year dealing with any and all challenges. " That is what I typed up on Facebook and Twitter for Monday Motivation. The previous year is done. Time to start anew in hopes of making the new year as great as you want it to be.


Don't let depression or anxiety win.
 
The New Year always brings a sense of looming dread for me, as it reinforces that I've wasted another year not progressing, not making improvements and just generally being a miserable sod. I'd ignored all my friends from June until last month and purged everything (Facebook, Instagram, etc.) to deliberately make it as hard as possible to get a hold of me. Suffice to say, none of them noticed. No socialising besides work and with family for more or less six months. The days were filled with going to work, coming home, playing games for a few hours (more to kill time, rather than enjoyment) before laying in bed wondering why I'm even on this planet. This obviously didn't do me any favours and I had a meltdown, to which I relayed everything to one of my closer friends.

He invited me to a big New Years party where literally everybody in our group was there. At first it was great, was lovely seeing everyone and just conversing, but after a few hours of normalcy, I just couldn't muster up the emotional energy to keep up the charade, so I spent a huge chunk of it just quietly sat with whoever was nearby. I had no stories to tell, no anecdotes, nothing to relate with because I'm just so miserable and scared that I don't attempt to do anything outside of work. I was surrounded by people, and yet it was the most alone I'd felt in ages. As dumb as it sounds, there's a bizarre comfort with being in a situation you hate, because at least you understand it; you know what you're getting, and it doesn't take any effort to do any different.

I did promise my friend that I'd be more vocal and willing to engage in social stuff, but so far I haven't really bothered. I was going to go with him to the gym as you always read that it has the same effect as six therapists in one for mental health or something, but I've just been skirting around it with excuses as I feel like I'd be out of place. I did attempt a few days in to the new year to be spontaneous and message a (former?) friend who I used to be really close with. She'd just completely blanked a message I'd sent a couple of years back and heard nothing from since. I let bygones be bygones and went in with no expectations, and sure enough, no response from her, so now I'm racking my brains figuring out what I've exactly done wrong, if anything at all.

I'm sad, tired, bored and frustrated with the life I'm living, but I can't fathom anything I can do that'll bring me joy or solace. Any attempt I make either goes wrong or just does nothing for me. I see all my friends being happy, getting engaged and buying houses, and I wonder what the hell I did wrong since our paths in life are all extremely similar. I can barely relate to anybody and can't even remember how to have a proper conversation at this stage. I just want something that isn't this.

Long rambling post, so thanks to anyone who even reads a third of this drivel.
 
INEEDNAWZZZ
The New Year always brings a sense of looming dread for me, as it reinforces that I've wasted another year not progressing, not making improvements and just generally being a miserable sod. I'd ignored all my friends from June until last month and purged everything (Facebook, Instagram, etc.) to deliberately make it as hard as possible to get a hold of me. Suffice to say, none of them noticed. No socialising besides work and with family for more or less six months. The days were filled with going to work, coming home, playing games for a few hours (more to kill time, rather than enjoyment) before laying in bed wondering why I'm even on this planet. This obviously didn't do me any favours and I had a meltdown, to which I relayed everything to one of my closer friends.

He invited me to a big New Years party where literally everybody in our group was there. At first it was great, was lovely seeing everyone and just conversing, but after a few hours of normalcy, I just couldn't muster up the emotional energy to keep up the charade, so I spent a huge chunk of it just quietly sat with whoever was nearby. I had no stories to tell, no anecdotes, nothing to relate with because I'm just so miserable and scared that I don't attempt to do anything outside of work. I was surrounded by people, and yet it was the most alone I'd felt in ages. As dumb as it sounds, there's a bizarre comfort with being in a situation you hate, because at least you understand it; you know what you're getting, and it doesn't take any effort to do any different.

I did promise my friend that I'd be more vocal and willing to engage in social stuff, but so far I haven't really bothered. I was going to go with him to the gym as you always read that it has the same effect as six therapists in one for mental health or something, but I've just been skirting around it with excuses as I feel like I'd be out of place. I did attempt a few days in to the new year to be spontaneous and message a (former?) friend who I used to be really close with. She'd just completely blanked a message I'd sent a couple of years back and heard nothing from since. I let bygones be bygones and went in with no expectations, and sure enough, no response from her, so now I'm racking my brains figuring out what I've exactly done wrong, if anything at all.

I'm sad, tired, bored and frustrated with the life I'm living, but I can't fathom anything I can do that'll bring me joy or solace. Any attempt I make either goes wrong or just does nothing for me. I see all my friends being happy, getting engaged and buying houses, and I wonder what the hell I did wrong since our paths in life are all extremely similar. I can barely relate to anybody and can't even remember how to have a proper conversation at this stage. I just want something that isn't this.

Long rambling post, so thanks to anyone who even reads a third of this drivel.
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I was in exactly the same boat a few years back. To an extent I still am - large social gatherings are my idea of hell; all they do is reinforce that I don't belong there. I never feel more lonely than when I'm surrounded by people.

Even classic car shows, which used to be something of a hobby, have just turned into something that kills time, because I just don't do well around so many people. According to most people, I'm loud, outspoken and opinionated, especially with cars, but in the setting of a car show/meet, I get drowned out by all the other personalities, and I just kind of fade out of conversations until nobody notices I'm not there anymore.

The only thing that really helped me was meeting the right person.

Feel free to message me if you want to chat
 
INEEDNAWZZZ
The New Year always brings a sense of looming dread for me, as it reinforces that I've wasted another year not progressing, not making improvements and just generally being a miserable sod. I'd ignored all my friends from June until last month and purged everything (Facebook, Instagram, etc.) to deliberately make it as hard as possible to get a hold of me. Suffice to say, none of them noticed. No socialising besides work and with family for more or less six months. The days were filled with going to work, coming home, playing games for a few hours (more to kill time, rather than enjoyment) before laying in bed wondering why I'm even on this planet. This obviously didn't do me any favours and I had a meltdown, to which I relayed everything to one of my closer friends.

He invited me to a big New Years party where literally everybody in our group was there. At first it was great, was lovely seeing everyone and just conversing, but after a few hours of normalcy, I just couldn't muster up the emotional energy to keep up the charade, so I spent a huge chunk of it just quietly sat with whoever was nearby. I had no stories to tell, no anecdotes, nothing to relate with because I'm just so miserable and scared that I don't attempt to do anything outside of work. I was surrounded by people, and yet it was the most alone I'd felt in ages. As dumb as it sounds, there's a bizarre comfort with being in a situation you hate, because at least you understand it; you know what you're getting, and it doesn't take any effort to do any different.

I did promise my friend that I'd be more vocal and willing to engage in social stuff, but so far I haven't really bothered. I was going to go with him to the gym as you always read that it has the same effect as six therapists in one for mental health or something, but I've just been skirting around it with excuses as I feel like I'd be out of place. I did attempt a few days in to the new year to be spontaneous and message a (former?) friend who I used to be really close with. She'd just completely blanked a message I'd sent a couple of years back and heard nothing from since. I let bygones be bygones and went in with no expectations, and sure enough, no response from her, so now I'm racking my brains figuring out what I've exactly done wrong, if anything at all.

I'm sad, tired, bored and frustrated with the life I'm living, but I can't fathom anything I can do that'll bring me joy or solace. Any attempt I make either goes wrong or just does nothing for me. I see all my friends being happy, getting engaged and buying houses, and I wonder what the hell I did wrong since our paths in life are all extremely similar. I can barely relate to anybody and can't even remember how to have a proper conversation at this stage. I just want something that isn't this.

Long rambling post, so thanks to anyone who even reads a third of this drivel.
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Feeling insular is far from unusual and trying to look outward is a difficult thing for many or most people.

And feeling isolated or alone in a big crowd is the normal for many. I know I find it difficult, even when amongst people with similar interests. In fact, you're probably not the only person in the room struggling with that, despite what it might appear.

Regarding your friend that hasn't replied - try not to spend effort on working out why. You've made the effort to get in touch, but sometimes it just doesn't work out. If they want to reply, they will.

It sounds like your friend that invited you to the new year party wants to try to help.

When I was struggling, I had a friend who contacted me regularly if I went "radio silent". It might help if you can find someone who you can trust to do the same for you. With people having such busy lives, its easy not to notice someone going quiet unless you're specifically looking out for it. But you need to find a way to be able to trust them in return and let them know things you might not feel comfortable about discussing. Whether that's a friend or someone else completely, is something which is different for every person.

I hope you can find the support you need.
 
I celebrated my 40th birthday yesterday. While I didn't do anything special this weekend besides cook up a special meal in the air fryer, I actually felt quite good. I was even glad to receive so many compliments and well wishes. I wanted to focus on mental health and mood for 2023. So far, I've been fairly well. Sometimes depression and anxiety hit you hard, some other times it eases off. Just make sure that depression and/or anxiety don't hit you hard enough to where you fail to function properly in life and society.


Don't let depression and/or anxiety win.
 
Casey
For the past week my social anxiety has gotten really bad honestly. I keep felling nauseated doing anything in public. :(
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You need to realize that few people actually care about you or even notice you. You could do really embarrassing stuff (which you most likely aren't doing anyway) and hardly anyone would notice it or care enough to remember it for longer than 15 minutes. You are one grain of sand on a beach.
It would be different if you were a celebrity but aren't one I guess.
 
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