Hi sxboyd,
Sorry you had such a bad experience with the game, but let me give my 2c in a response to your post:
I downloaded the demo before buying this game, and to be honest I didnt really care for it. I did a good number of races, as well as time trials (I fancied my chances of winning that Mustang by setting the best time on the SF track), and think in total I managed to finish less than 10% of the races I started since my car would simply fall apart from the damage after a couple of laps. While I've played a lot of the previous Toca/Race driver games, I've recently seen myself more of a Simulation fan, after religiously playing Forza 2 (please try to keep hate mail to a minimum) for the last year or so, even though I enjoyed PGR3/4 and especially DiRT too. Even though I had my doubts, I had faith in Codemasters and decided to buy it anyway.
So by the time I got my retail copy of GRiD I had basic wheel handling of the game down, but for the "introduction" race I could only manage top 5 or so. Coming from a simulation background, I can totally see your issues with the wheel defaults, it does take a while to "learn". And as a simulation driver comparing things to real life, having to learn a new control system clearly didnt go off well. If it helps, simply think of GRiD as a non racing game where you have to learn the controls from scratch, dont make any assumptions based on real life or previous gaming experience and it will go much smoother. I'd describe the wheel handling/response as a mix between DiRT and PGR. I generally found that the default feedback was a bit too intense, and toning it down made the experience slightly more enjoyable, although I am playing GRiD on default settings at the moment.
As for AI, I agree with powersaurus, that there is a lot of really awesome battles for individual positions. While the AI can be frustrating due to the non standard paths they take around the track, I found them to be quite a fun challenge (and definitely not a negative as you describe). It feels like most racing games have AI that follow this perfect line path around the track, and that you need to force your way through at times. This doesnt happen so much in GRiD, since if you wait 2 corners or so, the AI is bound to go ever so slightly wide giving you the chance to pass without contact, and it is very refreshing to not have to worry about the AI slamming you from behind (although they do try to close the door in corners which can lead to some contact, but usually not enough to spin you out or cause considerable damage).
20 cars seems to be a good number in most races, as it is just enough to work your way through over 3 laps, for you to take the win. I also appreciate the fact that the AI doesn't build up huge leads... nothing as frustrating as getting into 2nd position only to realize the no1 guy is like 30 seconds in front... this doesnt happen in GRiD.
As for cars being flat, I also had the same initial feeling. I couldn't seem to get them to corner the way I wanted, I definitely had the "boat" impression, however after a couple of races you learn how to use this to your advantage by taking corners at insane speeds. While not realistic in any way, it is incredibly fun to "throw" your car around corners. With the AI taking corners at similar speeds, it heightens the tension on individual position battles, which for me makes this game. I agree with powersaurus that this game has a competitive quality which is sadly lacking in simulation racing games.
You mentioned the stats while loading didnt impress you much, and that you just want the game to load. I think this is a wonderful idea, that rather than having a boring loading screen there are fun stats to look at to follow your progress through the game. Showing those stats take pretty much no resources, so it isnt extending the loading times, so why not keep the player entertained while loading? This is one of the breakthrough features of this game, and I hope all games implement this. I will however say that I wish they had the same stats in the menus, since I'd love to look at my stats at other times.
As for learning the tracks, yeah, it is a bit tough against the more difficult AI if you dont know the tracks yet. I'd recommend starting this game on easy until you know the tracks (or at least feel comfortable with the handling of some of the cars). The game does have a brake warning light (bottom left corner), which tells you when you need to slow down, and while useful isnt quite has nice as a braking line on track, but once you learn to use it effectively it helps quite a bit if you dont know the track. I do agree that they probably should've made the first couple of races be the same track or same car... to allow people to get to grips with handling/controls. Most reviews mentioned this as a "slightly higher than normal learning curve". This can be rather brutal on the Le Mans races (end of each season), since driving at night without knowing the track is quite challenging.
The challenge of dealing with new tracks and challenging AI is offset nicely by the flashback feature. For those who dont know, each race gives you 3 to 5 (depending on difficulty) flashbacks, where you can pause the race at any time and rewind the last 5 seconds or so... flashing back to any specific point in that replay. This is a lifesaver when you take a corner badly and take serious damage. Especially on longer races... when you've managed to fight your way thru the entire field, only to screw up on the final corner and spin out.. this feature makes this game. You simply rewind 5 seconds and redo it, without having to replay the entire 20 min race. Initially this feels like cheating, especially coming from simulation games, but looking back I wish I had this feature on Sim Endurance races (Forza / GT) and I would hate my self so much for throwing away hours of racing by losing concentration for a sec. I see this as a feature that will be common in racing games in the future.
I truly enjoy simulation games, but this game is so refreshingly different. It is an arcade game, so please don't play this game and compare it to GT or Forza... you will be heavily disappointed. However I do not feel that the physics/handling is a mistake, it is clear that Codemasters designed it this way to be fun.. to focus on the race. I feel they succeeded wonderfully and look forward to playing through the rest of the game.
The Toca/Race driver series was intended to be more realistic, but with Grid codemaster is changing their target audience (more mass appeal to all markets, not just EU), so a direct comparison isnt possible either.
As for the F1 game that codemasters is working on, I have faith in codemasters that they will give it simulation physics and not make it as arcady as Dirt/Grid. That being said, the Grid engine gives me a lot of hope for the F1 game, as the graphics is gorgeous and perfectly smooth. I havent played online much, but it seems rock solid (even when playing with people on the other side of the world), and a huge improvement over Dirt.
Let me know what you guys think.
, probably everyone is happy then 
), but it's a pity nobody has yet created a fully realistic rally game, featuring the attention to detail and accessability of the CMR series, the licence of WRC, the physics of Richard Burns Rally, and the full length stages of a little RAC Rally game I used to have back on the PC in around 1994!
