If bobs could talk, what would they say

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Phoenix AZ
nascarfan49
nascarfan49
So if your bob could talk to you ,what would he say to you?

I think mine would say,

I like using the X1 so I can ram people in the rear
What do you think, I am your b***h (remote racing/grinding)
Really? I have drive that!!
Oh come on! put me then the X1,
 
Mine would probably ask why i'm neglecting him. My friend made my bob on the MMA game and everytime bob made me mad, i'd call my friend and tell him to beat the crap out of him.
 
At Daytona:
Why are you getting mad at me for braking into a corner? Isn't that what you are supposed to do?
 
He probably would cry, from all the abuse I've been giving him over the past few months.
 
"You think you can drive better than me? Try driving the FGT around the Nurburgring at night for 10 hours!"
 
J. Walsh - My Maserati does 185

G. Simmons - Wouldn't say anything, just sticks out his tongue

G. Berger - "Did you find the snake?" - Search about Berger and Senna to understand this one.
 
He'd probably sound like "pbbttttt pbbtttt pbttttt" as he sat there blowing raspberries with his tongue and eating his boogers.
 
Once a week you pull me out of cold storage put me in an x2010 and make me drive 24 hrs straight in the rain. I quit. I'd rather drive for HRT.
 
R.Dajesus - calm headed:
"Okayokay, just keep cool around this corner, overtake this fu- HA! Now on to 2nd place!"

V.Marion - hot headed:
"🤬 🤬 SON OF A :censored:SUCKING 🤬! I'LL 🤬 YOUR 🤬 IN THE MIDDLE OF THE 🤬 ROAD IN BROAD 🤬 DAYLIGHT, YOU 🤬 🤬!"
 
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"OH, you want me to NOT smack that wall?" :dunce:

"Faster? Hey, what's the hurry? We still got 5 laps left!" :indiff:

"Slower??? But drifting that hairpin is so much fun!" :D

"How the 🤬 are you able to win here with 75 horses less than me, Mr. Bones?" :confused:

"MAINTAIN SPEED? Pfffft! Watch THIS!" :grumpy:

*Upon creation* "You picked me because of my NAME and DRIVER SUIT?"

*while retiring bad driver early* "But I have a wife, mortgage, and KIDS, Mr. Bone! Think about the kids!" :(
 
Bob: "Hey you!"... you are so dumb… you think you're giving me orders and I’m following them... but guess what? ... I will go directly to this curve and spin so hard that you will regret to continue give me orders ha ha ha!

Or

Bob: "Hey you"... I'm driving a Veyron and you? Do you enjoy your Toyota Camry? LOL


Or

Bob: Today I feel so depressed that I won’t win the cup races unless you buy me a new car (expensive one) ... (and upgrade it)… btw don’t give me orders or I will do the opposite!


Still…. I like my Bob’s …they’re my slaves :D
 
My Bob's regularly have conversations with the AI-Bobs;

AI-Bob1: "A few months ago, I was at this Autumn Ring Mini race and this guy, USER1 shows and starts driving like he owns the place. Right off the start, he must have hit at least 3 cars before the first corner, trying to pass people!"

My-Bob1: "I know that USER1 guy, I'm on his race team."

AI-Bob1: "And then for the first corner, it's like the guy had never heard of, you know the brake pedal - T-bones me and sends me spinning off into the corner!"

My-Bob1: "He gets pissed off when I don't drive like that - always saying 'go faster' and 'pass pass pass'."

AI-Bob2: "I was racing that guy in a NASCAR Championship, long story short - it was the final race and he was in dead last, no hope of placing - all I needed was to place in the top 5 to win the championship and this guy starts driving around the track backwards."

-stunned silence-

AI-Bob2: "and this guy hits me, head on at over 200mph! I swear to god my car was 200 feet in the air..."

AI-Bob1: "that guy is gonna kill someone..."

My-Bob2: "Why do all the racers on his team have 'Bob' for a first name?"

My-Bob3: "Why am I wearing a red shirt?"
 
ME: Overtake
BOB: That means I can drive through the car in front of me, right?
ME: No, that means go around.
BOB: Ok. I tried driving through the car in front and that didn't work. Now what?
ME: You can't drive through - go AROUND it.
BOB: I tried hitting the car in front reeaaaallly hard this time. Still didn't work, boss.
ME: Don't hit it, turn the steering wheel, then accelerate.
BOB: Steering wheel?
ME: #*%@@
___

ME: Pace up.
BOB: [yawn] What? Did you say "spin out on the next turn"?
ME: No, speed up, but don't spin out.
BOB: Spin out? Now?
ME: No, no, no... just speed up a little. DO NOT spin out.
BOB: Ok, I spun out, now what?
ME: #*%@@
BOB: Geez, why are you always so mad?
____

ME: Pace down.
BOB: WHAT? I'M REALLY EXCITED!!!! I'M NEAR OTHER CARS!!!!!
ME: Calm down, slow down, pace down.
BOB: WHAT? I'M TOO EXCITED!!!! ARE YOU TELLING ME TO SPIN OUT? YOU GOT MAD LAST TIME!!!!!
ME: [sigh] Does your door handle work? Please jump out and roll into traffic.
BOB: OK!!!! I SPUN OUT!!!! OOOH LOOK, I DID IT AGAIN!!! COOL! SPIN, SPIN, SPINNY!!!!
ME: [Holds down PS button]
 
^ :lol:

How about this recent one...

Bob: "...that's right I said pastrami with swiss on rye, hold the pickles...hold on a sec, can you? WHAT?"

ME: "Hey, can you pace up a bit?"

Bob: "Dude, your harshing me out. Do this do that...what's your prob?"

Me: "Um, we're in LAST PLACE, what the hell are you doing out there anyways? Was that a cell phone I jsut saw?"

Bob: "Last place? Are you sure. Wait. So that's why I don't see anybody in my review mirror"

Me: "...pastrami on rye, huh? No pickles, huh? Good thing I got that spying APP. You're fired, by the way." :dunce:
 
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