The General Relationship Thread

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that feeling when you think you're going to develop feelings for someone that you can't possibly be together with (no, not a celebrity crush). You have to avoid admitting those feelings because you're afraid of being heartbroken again. This feel like crap honestly.

sorry if you guys can't understand this post but i just want to rant.
 
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So... This situation is not mine, but from a friend of mine. He's been talking with a girl and they arranged a dinner and going to the theater. His problem is that the girl is very shy and he doesn't know how to express his feelings because she is very shy and he is afraid to either spook her or advance to fast. Can you give some advice please?
 
AlvaroF
So... This situation is not mine, but from a friend of mine. He's been talking with a girl and they arranged a dinner and going to the theater. His problem is that the girl is very shy and he doesn't know how to express his feelings because she is very shy and he is afraid to either spook her or advance to fast. Can you give some advice please?
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Express his feelings? If this is a first date, there is nothing to express. The first date is getting to know someone. This is where you see if you're compatible. Tell your friend to put his lust aside and get to know her.
 
If a girl says "I hope you're not in love with me" Is it a sign of total disinterest or it could mean something else?
 
Obelisk
Did something happen?
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Team THRT Drift
Next time bud. Chin up 👍
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Well, nothing bad. The problem that I have is that this is still going on. She lingered around class because I was still there, but this guy would not leave me alone. He kept talking, and talking and talking. Me not wanting to be a dick I just accepted that he wasn't going to shut the **** up and let me work, so I let conversion flow despite her wanting to talk.

Anyways, she had to go and just left. I just want to end this all. I don't like this at all, especially since she's making it so ****ing transparent that she likes me.

I feel like a dense fool because I've been holding off so much. Doesn't help that she keeps hinting. (Teasing about how organized I am and saying "You're awesome." blah, blah.) I appreciate it, but ****.

So, I'm about to put an end to it all, either good or bad.

I hope it's worth the annoyance. She's cool, and all. I heard her discussing the Jaguar E-Type with the teacher. (He owns one.) She has suggested interest of cars whenever the teacher and I speak of cars.

@Team THRT Drift She seems kinda unicornish, but ****. I feel like a fool for letting stuff slip between the chunky hands I have.
 
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Yeah, just stay calm. Getting upset about it isn't going to help anything.


Today wasn't too productive for me, but interesting none the less. She seemed a bit off today. I only got a smile or two and they were kind of half effort courtesy smiles it seemed. Towards the end of the day she didn't seem well at all, walking around with her arms crossed and sitting staring at her phone, just to pass the time. Often times with her head resting on her hand, making her look a bit like the cartoon clip art baby on the flyer that tells parents to leave their kids home when they're sick. When I left, it looked like she put on a bit of a brave face and gave me a very pleasant good bye. Either she was texting someone she liked and he turned her down or shes upset that I am not making a move. Either way, I have to do something about it. Like @Team THRT Drift said, I am probably lusting after her too much. Just because I ask her out doesn't mean I have "sealed the deal" or anything, it means that I have got my foot in the door so we can learn more about each other and then it can turn into something. I think that's where I have been putting pressure on myself
 
AJHG1000
Well, I've never trusted online dating, so I have never used it, because you don't get to know the people you're interacting with.
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To be fair, it's not that bad, I've talked to her friends so they could try to get her to meet another guy.
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Or just tell her she's like a sister to you.


done

she gone






Or you're dead, with a knife in your chest and dark chocolate coming out of your butt... because that's what happens when you die supposedly.
 
sorry, that was a dumb question. It's just that it's kinda hard to explain.

Ugh This is embarrassing. It's this girl, i mean we only met at Tinder, and we only talk a bit but somehow it felt just everything clicked, it's like of all the other girls that matched, this one just felt different. I know stuff like Tinder shouldn't be taken seriously, that's why i feel a bit.. ashamed i guess ?
 
it's like Rick and Jessie in the Walking Dead. I mean, he only known her for a while and suddenly get all crazy for her. It's a little like that but not to crazy, that's what i'm feeling right now. Add to the fact that difference on religion played a part in this (it's practically a must in my family that we have to be with someone with the same religion, i personally don't care about that but still)
 
My saga with a girl I work with continues.

Last week I sort of asked her out. We finish work at 9pm, and I casually invited her to a Starbucks for some coffee after. It wasn't very well thought out on my part (we finish relatively late, she has very controlling parents), and she turned me down.

Since then, all of the signs she was dropping to me have disappeared. Before, she would casually come talk to me herself, and we would make eye contact every time I would walk by her office, exchange smiles, etc. None of that happening anymore. Whenever I try to talk to her myself, she avoids eye contact, gives me quick 2-3 word answers, and just doesn't seem to have much interest in holding a conversation whatsoever. When I'm near her, its like I don't exist, and when I talk to her, its like I am disturbing her.

At this point I'm not sure what to do. I don't know if she got scared by me attempting to ask her out and I should just back off for a bit and give her some time, or whether I should keep pushing and hope she eases up. Or maybe I just flat out blew it.
 
Anthony
My saga with a girl I work with continues.

Last week I sort of asked her out. We finish work at 9pm, and I casually invited her to a Starbucks for some coffee after. It wasn't very well thought out on my part (we finish relatively late, she has very controlling parents), and she turned me down.

Since then, all of the signs she was dropping to me have disappeared. Before, she would casually come talk to me herself, and we would make eye contact every time I would walk by her office, exchange smiles, etc. None of that happening anymore. Whenever I try to talk to her myself, she avoids eye contact, gives me quick 2-3 word answers, and just doesn't seem to have much interest in holding a conversation whatsoever. When I'm near her, its like I don't exist, and when I talk to her, its like I am disturbing her.

At this point I'm not sure what to do. I don't know if she got scared by me attempting to ask her out and I should just back off for a bit and give her some time, or whether I should keep pushing and hope she eases up. Or maybe I just flat out blew it.
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Ease off and give her room. If she still avoids you, you blew it.
 
Anthony
At this point I'm not sure what to do. I don't know if she got scared by me attempting to ask her out and I should just back off for a bit and give her some time, or whether I should keep pushing and hope she eases up. Or maybe I just flat out blew it.
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Eh, that's how I felt with asking out this girl in my class. I don't want **** to go haywire or fall flat and cause maximum awkwardness. Leave it all alone. She'll probably warm back up, but back off, especially if she's been acting the way she has for the past few days.
 
I have a friend that acts that way all the time. Ever since I met her, she's been up and down. Ignoring me for a whole semester, then acting like we're best buds in the next semester.

She would ghost me in the hallways, avoid eye contact, won't speak. Then suddenly she'll drop hints everywhere...

I told her straight up, if I wanted to date her I would've asked her out a long time ago. She seemed disgusted with my answer and is now flat out avoiding me which is nice. Still don't understand why, I mean she has a boyfriend, and I have a girlfriend.... She'll still call me up or text me if she needs anything which is shallow AF.



Anyway, enough about me and my so called "friends".

I would advise just leaving the situation alone. Look for someone else. If she rebounds, then so be it. If not, keep looking. Don't get tunnel vision.
 
Yeah, I'd wait on it for a little while and like @Team THRT Drift said, don't exclusively focus on her for the time being. If she comes around, great, but if she doesn't you won't be hung up and you'll find someone new.

I didn't expect the girl i like to be at work today. I was expecting a pretty dull, whatever day as she wouldn't be there, so naturally I just put on a whatever shirt, very quickly got ready before I left, because who do I have to impress, right? Well, it turns out she came in to work today. I was a little stunned and caught off guard. She seemed a lot happier than yesterday, so like the paranoid asshole I am, I freaked out. Why is she so happy now, when she was sad yesterday? Did she find someone new?! Of course this was just stupid nonsense. We talked quite a bit today, all about work, but something was there that wasn't very "work related." She told me that I needed to finish my work a little earlier today because she had a babysitting job to go to. This is just information and when she gives people information, it merely sounds like someone giving information. But her way of speaking seemed different to that. I don't know if "flirty" is the right word but it seemed in a bit high spirits, lets say, than when she gives anyone else information. It almost seemed like she was trying to make the conversations longer and make excuses to talk to me, and like an idiot i didn't try to do that myself. From me it was mostly: "Yeah, sure. No problem. I know what you mean. Don't worry, I can handle it." This is how I saw it anyways.
 
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