The General Relationship Thread

[Frisky]

Why?

She was the first the girl I had 'Special times' with, I know it's stupid. I hate what she's done, but for some reason, I can't feel any hate for her. I guess I'll get over her by my community service is over, it'll give me something to do anyway XD

 

[Johnnypenso]

...wall of text...

Good for you Dude, if you were old enough and lived near me I'd buy you a or five And I guarantee with a war story like that, and bumps and bruises, you'd be getting more 🤬 than 10 men!!!!

Next time though, just say to him, "You know there's no cure for herpes eh?" and walk away...

 

[Danny]

Quite frankly, she's treated you like dirt and you're only really into her because she was the 'first', and you've fallen into the trap of assuming that the first is the best and only. For your own sake, stop it.

Also, if you are indeed from Doncaster, it's not like you'll be running out of things to do on Community Service any time soon.

 

[Frisky]

Quite frankly, she's treated you like dirt and you're only really into her because she was the 'first', and you've fallen into the trap of assuming that the first is the best and only. For your own sake, stop it.

Also, if you are indeed from Doncaster, it's not like you'll be running out of things to do on Community Service any time soon.

Doncaster - Most ASBO riddled town in the country. But seriously, your right, I'll end up getting myself into a right tangle. Thank you

Good for you Dude, if you were old enough and lived near me I'd buy you a or five And I guarantee with a war story like that, and bumps and bruises, you'd be getting more 🤬 than 10 men!!!!

Next time though, just say to him, "You know there's no cure for herpes eh?" and walk away...

Thanks dude, I wish I thought of all these great one-liners at the time!

 

[Slash]

@slash her boyfriend treats her like crap, you treat your girlfriend like crap, how is this other girl ever to believe she's bettering herself by getting with you?

Anyway while your still in a relationship you shouldnt even be looking at other girls.

I dob't treat my girlfriend like crap. In fact she says I treat her like gold. All the time.

 

[McLaren]

I dob't treat my girlfriend like crap. In fact she says I treat her like gold. All the time.

She's obviously not very bright then if she has no problem with her boyfriend chasing other girls.

 

[BLJK Ice]

She's obviously not very bright then if she has no problem with her boyfriend chasing other girls.

Or she might not have emotions. I'm a guy and they say guys have less emotion than girls, but when i saw my old girlfriend snogging some guy back then i just went rage and all and punched the guy in the face and all of that.

 

[cphbullet]

I dob't treat my girlfriend like crap. In fact she says I treat her like gold. All the time.

She's obviously not very bright then if she has no problem with her boyfriend chasing other girls.

I wouldn't like to word it particularly like Mclaren has because i wouldn't want to say she's 'not very bright' but i do have to agree with him, i hurt myself so much more than my ex ever did, every time she bumped me off for another guy (not left me just chose to spend time with them) i would bite my tongue and not say a word for fear of losing her and it absolutely destroyed me inside, my guess is that she's doing the same.

No one unless they were psychologically unbalanced or were into something would be ok with their partner chasing after someone else.

 

[Slash]

She's obviously not very bright then if she has no problem with her boyfriend chasing other girls.

Its not that she's not bright, its almost like she knows better or something. IDK

Or she might not have emotions. I'm a guy and they say guys have less emotion than girls, but when i saw my old girlfriend snogging some guy back then i just went rage and all and punched the guy in the face and all of that.

IDK it bothers her but she seems to put it past her and move on. She's like I'm not going anywhere. Ever.

I wouldn't like to word it particularly like Mclaren has because i wouldn't want to say she's 'not very bright' but i do have to agree with him, i hurt myself so much more than my ex ever did, every time she bumped me off for another guy (not left me just chose to spend time with them) i would bite my tongue and not say a word for fear of losing her and it absolutely destroyed me inside, my guess is that she's doing the same.

No one unless they were psychologically unbalanced or were into something would be ok with their partner chasing after someone else.

See above

 

[McLaren]

Or she might not have emotions. I'm a guy and they say guys have less emotion than girls, but when i saw my old girlfriend snogging some guy back then i just went rage and all and punched the guy in the face and all of that.

She's a girl. They're full of emotions....

 

[NissanSkylineN1]

She's a girl. They're full of emotions....

Almost too much.....


@Frisky

I'm impressed how you beat the 🤬 out of a dude despite your size...

Still kinda stupid to fight him unless he said something to you...I would've sworn and told your ex the worst things you could ever say if I was as mad as you and needed a way to vent your anger.


If you wanna really keep a girl, do everything you can to make her happy, within reasonable limits. Everyday, tell her she's pretty, tell her she's smart, etc. Do cute things that melt her heart (I once fake proposed to my GF with a ring pop, tell her shes gorgeous everyday, make her comfortable). Share experiences. Be comfortable with her and tell her what goes on in your mind, don't hide stuff from eachother. My GF and I have been together for 14 months almost, and not to sound cocky, but many other couples are jealous of us. Why? Because we're strong together. Our strengths make up for eachother's weaknesses. We're both loyal to eachother... no "big spoon" or :censored:whipping going on. Although our opinions and values differ (I'm slightly religious, she isnt, im a city boy, shes a country girl, etc.), we like to share our experiences and try to take the best of both of our opinions and agree. We both want the best for us, not our personal selves. And yes, sexual attraction is an important role, she should be attractive to you, but remember that personality, maturity, and other mental factors are more important that attractiveness.
Maturity plays a big role in relationships, and in High School, its really hard to find. Most guys want somewhere to stick it in, and most girls just want drama and have fun. You will notice that if you make her happy and comfortable, the feeling of knowing that you have someone who you are comforting, making them feel secure, and that loves you will make you happy and comfortable too.

 

[MarinaDiamandis]

If you wanna really keep a girl, do everything you can to make her happy, within reasonable limits. Everyday, tell her she's pretty, tell her she's smart, etc. Do cute things that melt her heart (I once fake proposed to my GF with a ring pop, tell her shes gorgeous everyday, make her comfortable).

I think you'll find that's how you lose a girl...

 

[NissanSkylineN1]

I think you'll find that's how you lose a girl...

What, making a girl feel good about herself?

 

[XS]

I think you'll find that's how you lose a girl...

Eh, depends on the girl. You gotta know your girl, but some really do go for the heart-melting affection while others are like, seriously dude, back off.

 

[MarinaDiamandis]

What, making a girl feel good about herself?

There's making a girl feel good about herself and making a girl feel good about herself.

Despite what Hollywood might have you believe, the majority of women don't want a soppy romantic guy who compliments them at every opportunity and makes silly little gestures with candy.

You do not need to be telling a girl that she is hot (unless she has low self-esteem) if you have already showed/convinced her that she is - which you should have. I'd say that if you can't playfully mock her appearance without her throwing a fit, ur doin it wrong.

 

[NissanSkylineN1]

I didn't mean to come across as if you should do that every second... but I mean like, you should make her feel special, and maintain it as much as you can.

 

[Johnnypenso]

I didn't mean to come across as if you should do that every second... but I mean like, you should make her feel special, and maintain it as much as you can.

There's a fine balance to be maintained, especially with a teenaged girl. Something is only "special" if it's rare or unique. If it happens all the time it becomes routine, ordinary, the "norm" and therefore no longer special.

Women in general and teenaged girls in particular, tend to be insecure to begin with so making them feel special once in a while is a good thing, but too much of a good thing is not a good thing, that's where the balance comes in. It might seem counter intuitive but if you are too complimentary, too reassuring, you become boring and predictable and there's no challenge left. To some degree she should have to work to get your attention, it shouldn't come to her too easily all the time. If she gets your attention and devotion and praise too easily, it'll start to become more of a challenge to get it from someone else...that's when the cheating happens.

Other thing to keep in mind is that you should show her she's special more with actions and less with words. Telling her she's beautiful is one thing but any guy or girl can tell her that. You're supposed to be the only one who can be physical with her so dragging her behind a bush and:censored: the 🤬 out of her when she looks super hot tells her that you really "feel" it. When she wears a new pair of hot jeans don't say anything to her when you pick her up, but thoughout the night grab her 🤬 as much as you can. She'll "know" it's because of the jeans. Actions do speak louder than words.

 

[cphbullet]

IDK it bothers her but she seems to put it past her and move on. She's like I'm not going anywhere. Ever.

I'm not sure if thats intended as a defence but i really wouldn't say it counts as one, she's your girlfriend and it should hurt you knowing it bothers her, just because she's 'not going anywhere. Ever.' it doesn't give you the right to treat her badly or string her along while you try to find someone else.

Also happy birthday lol

 

[Slash]

I'm not sure if thats intended as a defence but i really wouldn't say it counts as one, she's your girlfriend and it should hurt you knowing it bothers her, just because she's 'not going anywhere. Ever.' it doesn't give you the right to treat her badly or string her along while you try to find someone else.

Also happy birthday lol

I don't treat her badly or ever talk about the other situation, she just knows about the situation. That said I think I'll give her the chance and make more of an attempt to forget the other girl.


And thanks =P

 

[cphbullet]

That said I think I'll give her the chance and make more of an attempt to forget the other girl.


And thanks =P

The response i was looking for :tup:

Your welcome

 

[SlipZtrEm]

I didn't mean to come across as if you should do that every second... but I mean like, you should make her feel special, and maintain it as much as you can.

There's a particular line from 40 Year Old Virgin about pedestals that I think applies here.

 

[Johnnypenso]

I don't treat her badly or ever talk about the other situation, she just knows about the situation. That said I think I'll give her the chance and make more of an attempt to forget the other girl.
And thanks =P

You only have to talk about it once, and she'll never, ever forget it. That damage is already done.

 

[photonrider]

Yes. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.




Should I put that in quotes or is it now part of the language?

 

[XS]

Women never forget anything ! Seriously, it's the most amazing thing in nature. They can recall, in perfect detail, anything hurtful ever said to them. On the flip side, most also possess this ability for anything flattering said to them.

 

[Luminis]

Women never forget anything ! Seriously, it's the most amazing thing in nature. They can recall, in perfect detail, anything hurtful ever said to them. On the flip side, most also possess this ability for anything flattering said to them.

But they'll forget that you told'em you were gonna go drinkin' with the boys ten seconds after you said it

About the whole "making them feel special" thing. Be careful with that. Some girls will get the notion that you're stretching yourself like mad just to appeal to her, which, then, makes them think they can do whatever without ever facing any consequences. It should go without saying, but a woman should put the same effort into a relationship as the guy does.

 

[Callum B]

This is how things are at the minute with me: I'm in love with my bestfriend and she knows it, I've confessed it to her and she's completely okay with it, we've actually become closer since then and although she said she loves me she said not in the same way I do. Since then I've been keeping my options open because becoming obsessed with one girl who is unlikely to go out with me isn't something I desire, in the mean time I sense I'm slowly winning her heart but that's something else.

I was just wondering with this going on would it be morally right to go out with another girl? (not that any have come along mind) I just think I need another girl to come and 'scoop me off my feet' so to move on properly.

Sorry I'm not good at paragraphing, you can see why I'm scraping the C/D borderline in English language.

 

[XS]

This is how things are at the minute with me: I'm in love with my bestfriend and she knows it, I've confessed it to her and she's completely okay with it, we've actually become closer since then and although she said she loves me she said not in the same way I do. Since then I've been keeping my options open because becoming obsessed with one girl who is unlikely to go out with me isn't something I desire, in the mean time I sense I'm slowly winning her heart but that's something else.

I was just wondering with this going on would it be morally right to go out with another girl? (not that any have come along mind) I just think I need another girl to come and 'scoop me off my feet' so to move on properly.

Sorry I'm not good at paragraphing, you can see why I'm scraping the C/D borderline in English language.

Yes, it is morally and ethically fine for you to move on. If she doesn't want you romantically then you're not hurting her. You could, however, tell her that if she doesn't want to date that you have to move on in order to be happy. If she really doesn't want to date then she'll understand and agree. Trust me, the sooner you move on, the happier you'll be! It's a bad spot to be in when the person you're infatuated with finds another person .

 

[Johnnypenso]

This is how things are at the minute with me: I'm in love with my bestfriend and she knows it, I've confessed it to her and she's completely okay with it, we've actually become closer since then and although she said she loves me she said not in the same way I do. Since then I've been keeping my options open because becoming obsessed with one girl who is unlikely to go out with me isn't something I desire, in the mean time I sense I'm slowly winning her heart but that's something else.

I was just wondering with this going on would it be morally right to go out with another girl? (not that any have come along mind) I just think I need another girl to come and 'scoop me off my feet' so to move on properly.

Sorry I'm not good at paragraphing, you can see why I'm scraping the C/D borderline in English language.

This isn't a moral issue. You have no commitment to your best friend and she's certainly given you none either. You are friends, nothing more and she's made that very clear. It only makes sense that you move along with your life. In fact, being involved with someone else will probably make you more attractive to your friend. Find someone else, spend time with them and be unavailable to your friend for the most part. The more you are around, the more available you are, the less attractive you'll be. The busier you are, the happier you are in your own life, the more attractive you'll be to her. It may not be in the cards, and you have to accept that, but dating someone else will definitely tip the odds in your favour.

 

[Brutaka]

This is how things are at the minute with me: I'm in love with my bestfriend and she knows it, I've confessed it to her and she's completely okay with it, we've actually become closer since then and although she said she loves me she said not in the same way I do. Since then I've been keeping my options open because becoming obsessed with one girl who is unlikely to go out with me isn't something I desire, in the mean time I sense I'm slowly winning her heart but that's something else.

I was just wondering with this going on would it be morally right to go out with another girl? (not that any have come along mind) I just think I need another girl to come and 'scoop me off my feet' so to move on properly.

Sorry I'm not good at paragraphing, you can see why I'm scraping the C/D borderline in English language.

I had the exact same situation but I came out lucky and now we're dating. I suggest you talk to her.

 

[Callum B]

By morally right I mean for any other girl I date, because I'll think they'll always be second best which is wholly unfair on them.