The Simpsons Quotes

[xAkirax2004]

*Flanders talking about the internet*


Homer: Internet eh?

Flanders: Yeah, Its good because Modd sells ancient rugs too!

Homer: Modd Eh?

 

[Bollocks#999]

thats spelt Maude actually 👍

Bart: Eye of the tiger Bart, eye of the tiger
*thump*
Bart: I did it I stopped it
Nelson: ...and I hurt somebody

later...

Homer: We could argue about who forgot to pick up who untill the cows came home

 

[kirkis9]

homer: ok, if i was Ned Flanders where would i go?
*im a nerd who wears the same geek sweater every* THE SPRINGFIELD RIVER!

 

[Bollocks#999]

Homer: Now I have 4 children, you shall be called stitchface

 

[millencolin]

Homer walking down the street

"PIANO LADY" and this piano lands on his foot

 

[miniMADness]

Originally posted by kirkis9
the PTA is disbanding! ahhhhhhh *jumps out window*

then skinner goes:the pta isnt disbanding
guy jumps back in the window

 

[Pupik]

Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.

 

[Bollocks#999]

...Homer: Thanks a lot Lenny, now Ive lost my train of thought

Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
Lisa Needs Braces.
Dental Plan!
if we give up our Dental plan, I'll have to pay for Lisa's braces

 

[miniMADness]

in that scene...
homer: and Toothy Joe, where would you be without the dental plan?
Joe: well, i wouldnt have old chomper thats for sure (digs his only tooth into a can)

 

[millencolin]

homer: it doesnt matter if you win or lose, it how drunk you get

 

[Mike Rotch]

Homer: I tired of watching Tarzan
Lisa: Dad! It a documentary about homeless people!
Homer: I dont like this movie.



Voice over on Buck McCoy's (the alcoholic cowboy) old movie:

Introducing McTrigger. Star of " 'Scuse me, while I kill the Sky" For those who know the Jimi Hendrix/purple haze story

 

[Duke]

Kent Brockman: "What about the children, Arnie? Are they all right?"
Arnie: "I can't see through metal, Kent!"

 

[Pupik]

Troy McClure: ...also starred in such education films such as "Zero Minus One Equals Negative Fun!"

Geeky, but it kills me for some reason.

 

[Solid Lifters]

Originally posted by pupik
Troy McClure: ...also starred in such education films such as "Zero Minus One Equals Negative Fun!"

Geeky, but it kills me for some reason.

And. "Zippy, the super-wonder slug!" always gets me.

 

[Zrow]

"Dad, what's a muppet?"
"Well, it's not quite a mop, and it's not quite a puppet, but maan.... so to answer your question, I don't know."

"It's eleven o'clock. Do you know where your children are?"
"No, I told you that last night! Where is Bart, anyway? His food is getting all cold, and eaten."

(At the movie contest)

"Krusty, how can you vote for Mr. Burns' movie?"
"Let's just say it moved me... TO A BIGGER HOUSE!!! Woops, said the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud..."

 

[Max Powers]

(Homer is driving Bart, Milhouse, and Nelson somewhere)
Milhouse: I know, let's play a game! I spy with my little eye, something that begins with a D.

Nelson: DINGUS! (punches Milhouse on top of his head and knocks him out.)

Homer: God bless you, Nelson Muntz!

Nelson: Nah, I'm no hero, I just like to hit people on the head.

 

[Max Powers]

Kent Brockman (talking to kid's news cast): Good luck on your broadcast today kids! (yelling to somebody off of the set) WHERE THE HELL IS MY GRILLED CHEESE?

 

[Mike Rotch]

Homer at silent auction: Hehe! Im gonna burn Flanders on this one.

Scribbles: Ned Flanders Bids $50

Auctioneer: And the winner of the 100 dollar bill is. Ned Flanders!

Homer: Doa!

Flanders: This is going straight to charity.

Homer: Doa!

 

[Cap'n Jack]

I know lots of things said on the simpsons...

Principal Scinner:"...And for once our computer lab actully has a computer in it"
Ralph:"Hi Lisa Hi super nintendo chalmers, Im learnding."
Lisa:"Thats good Ralph"

Principal Scinner:"...Ralph wiggum"
Ralph:"I won, I won!"
Principal Scinner:"No ralph this means you failed english"
Ralph:"Me fail english thats unpossible"

Ralph"I found a moon rock in my nose"!
Bart:"Houston we have a booger"!

HomerSinging)"Simpson, Homer simpson he's the greatest guy in history from the town of springfeild hes about to hit a chest nut tree...AAAAAAH"!

Bart & MilhouseSinging)"Springfeild, Springfeild its a hell of a town the school yards up and the shopping malls down, the stray dogs go to the animal pound. Springfeild springfeild springfield springfield(Sailor)"New york new york!"
(Bart)"New yourk is that-a-way man!"
Bart and milhouse:"ITS A HELL OF A TOWN!"

I have more but I just cant think at the moment!

 

[oscarfulz]

the one that kills me all the time is the ralph one, when he walks lisa home "sooooo..... you like stuff?"

"the doctor said i wouldnt have so many nose bleeds if i kept my fingure out of there"

 

[Cap'n Jack]

homer: hey Bart, do that thing you do.
Bart:What thing?
Homer:You know, that thing...
...Go to bed!

 

[Cap'n Jack]

I got another!!!

Bart:So in say...Rand Mcnally the toilet's go backward's?
Lisa:Yes...Infact, in rand Mcnally people wear hats on there feet and hamburgers eat people!

 

[Ev0]

Homer to Bart: Son, if you want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers!

 

[lethalAE86typeR]

HOMER: can we go home now

BART: we are home

HOMER: that was fast

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Homer:THAT'S IT I'M GOING TO CLOWN COLLAGE!
Bart: I don't think any of us expected him to say that.

 

[oscarfulz]

dont remember the lines exactly but it goes something like this:

(episode when lisa pretens to be from college)

college girl: i cant believe i just cheated off an either grader
college girl 2: shes worse than that 70 yr old who tried to pass as a student...

mole man: i just wanted to sit down..

 

[Race Idiot]

"The Bee Bit My Bottom. And Now My Bottom's Big!"

 

[under18carbon]

I watched this episode yesterday... (it's not the latest! ) It's about Homer getting an open heart surgery, I think.

Homer in hospital bed pressing buttons to control the bed : "Bed goes up, bed goes down, bed goes up, bed goes down, bed goes up, bed goes down"

And there was another part when Lisa thought Homer would die :

Lisa : *Thinks about Homer in heaven*
"Cloud goes up, cloud goes down, cloud goes up,
cloud goes down"

And my favourite... was Bart's first words when he was a baby :

*Bart enters his parents bedroom and saw .. well, you know, that activity? *

Bart : " Aye caramba!"

********

Homer to Bart : Say 'daddy'! 'Daaaaaddy'!
Bart : Homer!
Homer : 'Daddy!'
Bart : Homer!

*Homer proceeds to choke his son*

Oh god I love The Simpsons..

 

[Bollocks#999]

Bart: (to the kids of shelbyville) Look, someones attractive cousin

 

[miniMADness]

and also in the Shelbyville episode...

Tow Truck Driver:...and if you dont mind, all this talkings making me thirsty(Bites into a lemon, his face screws up and his eyes water)