Best/Worst You've Dealt With in GTA Online

[Dan]

That money could've been useful tomorrow

I just remembered the update is tomorrow.

 

[Johnny1996]

I came across one of those players who do nothing but go out of their way just to cause trouble with one other player and won't leave them alone. I was that player who was on the receiving end of it. In one of the funnier moments from this battle, I was in a Cargobob at the end opposite the annoying player, who was at the end where the planes and helicopters spawn, at Sandy Shores. My plan was to fly down and pick his car up with him in it, and fly it over the lake and drop it. That backfired however, as he was already out of his vehicle. Luckily I was able to chopper blade his car right into him, and both he and his car went flying into a fighter jet that he had waiting for him. Upon impact, the jet exploded which then caused the car to explode and in the middle of it was him, who got killed. After he respawned, he came after me with a Buzzard which I was able to evade as he didn't use anything but the guns on it. Maybe I trolled him a little but it made for a pretty funny death in my book.

 

[Dan]

I came across one of those players who do nothing but go out of their way just to cause trouble with one other player and won't leave them alone. I was that player who was on the receiving end of it. In one of the funnier moments from this battle, I was in a Cargobob at the end opposite the annoying player, who was at the end where the planes and helicopters spawn, at Sandy Shores. My plan was to fly down and pick his car up with him in it, and fly it over the lake and drop it. That backfired however, as he was already out of his vehicle. Luckily I was able to chopper blade his car right into him, and both he and his car went flying into a fighter jet that he had waiting for him. Upon impact, the jet exploded which then caused the car to explode and in the middle of it was him, who got killed. After he respawned, he came after me with a Buzzard which I was able to evade as he didn't use anything but the guns on it. Maybe I trolled him a little but it made for a pretty funny death in my book.

The most surprising part of the story is that he wasn't using the Buzzard's rockets immediately.

 

[Johnny1996]

The most surprising part of the story is that he wasn't using the Buzzard's rockets immediately.

Oh yes. Very.

He was a level 4 so maybe he didn't how you could change them or something. Or even he was waiting until I least expected him to use them, but either way he died after smacking into a windmill and gave up on me.

 

[GT5Power]

Yesterday morning I joined the Stunt Series on call and was put in a Downtown Loop session, one of my favourite tracks. I miraculously avoided the 1st-turn carnage and maintained a comfortable lead until about halfway through the second (and final) lap. I let the pursuer in a red T20 overtake me because I didn't want any trouble - I don't get too defensive unless it's really close to the end of the race - and he got ahead by about 2 seconds. Three checkpoints before the finish I finally got closer to him with a lot of momentum. He brake-checked me in an attempt to spin me out, but as I was going much faster his car was the one to perform a wonderful 360º turn. I then proceeded to win the race while he finished second. He turned on his mic...

Stupid 🤬 piece of 🤬! I was winning and he went and smashed me off the 🤬 road! Mother:censored:

Vespucci was voted for as the next race. He was still moaning about how it was my fault that he ended up doing a 360 while I sped off and talking about his life and how he spent 11 years living on the street, and as it turned out he had friends in the lobby who were now out to get me. I remained silent and set my winning taunt to "The Bird" on the betting screen.

This time, I didn't escape the carnage. I did recover however, and made it up to 3rd, a few seconds behind the lead cars which were being driven by buddies of the salty guy. As I attempted a very risky pass for 2nd place, my opponent sacrificed himself to knock me into the water, which he succeeded at. I respawned quicker and made a beeline for the leader, eventually catching up in the tube before the final turn on the last lap. I overtook him and he made a last desperate attempt to dive-bomb me at the very last turn, only to fail miserably while I claimed victory. The salty guy finished 7th or so.

- Which place did you get?
- Second.
- Second, that's not bad! I just hope that 🤬 piece of 🤬 didn't win again. obviously he didn't see the leaderboard lol

What he did see was my character in front of his Zentorno, flipping him off on the winner's screen... Let's just say he was absolutely livid.

Mother:censored: n:censored: son of a 🤬 :censored:face!

All that salt made me quite thirsty and I needed water, so I quietly left the session as he was still using his entire arsenal of swear words on me.

 

[Nick Skyline]

*insert story about a run in with an overly competitive angry gamer and his posse*

I honestly get a bit disappointed at the lengths some people will go to make sure you don't win, and the anger those same people exhibit when you do win (over the mic, and in text message if they don't have a mic)...I haven't run into this as much as some other people here as I don't frequent public lobbies very often. And it's not just this game; as numerous other people have already said here, every game where you race cars has this issue.

Anyways, two stories from me, I'm host for both of them, catchup and slipstream are off because that's how I roll.

First up, The Commute - one of the really fast races where you don't need to use the brakes except for one turn, me (Dominator Racecar) and exactly one other guy. He (Gauntlet Racecar) rams me into the wall right after the start and starts swerving all over the road, obviously trying to make sure I don't get past him. Screws up the turn where you have to use the brakes, giving a wide opening for me to make a clean pass. He tries his best to keep up with me at this point, but can't. He leaves immediately upon realizing that, so I dash to the line all alone. Unlike this guy you went with, he had no reaction to knowing he couldn't win - leading me to believe he doesn't care about his win/loss ratio at all. This isn't a "best" or a "worst" story, this is more of a "whatever" story.

Second one, this came earlier - not the same day: I'm host for a series of Stunt races that got merged with another lobby, and in comes some guy (I'll call him Ned) and @GOTMAXPOWER (I'll call him Max). Stunt race is Duel - the one where the road splits and there's a narrow part. I get out my Stallion racecar, and Ned gets a lowrider. Max (Dominator Racecar) and I finish our first lap without any problems, yet we run into Ned on our 2nd, adamant to not let anyone through by purposely blocking the road with his lowrider. So we go around on the blue road and finish our second lap. Max finished 2nd, I finished 3rd, but I wasn't happy because I was unable to kick Ned at this point and clear up the red road.

EDIT: Non-contact stunt races are now possible, so that should help to remedy this issue.

 

[GOTMAXPOWER]

Second one, this came earlier - not the same day: I'm host for a series of Stunt races that got merged with another lobby, and in comes some guy (I'll call him Ned) and @GOTMAXPOWER (I'll call him Max). Stunt race is Duel - the one where the road splits and there's a narrow part. I get out my Stallion racecar, and Ned gets a lowrider. Max (Dominator Racecar) and I finish our first lap without any problems, yet we run into Ned on our 2nd, adamant to not let anyone through by purposely blocking the road with his lowrider. So we go around on the blue road and finish our second lap. Max finished 2nd, I finished 3rd, but I wasn't happy because I was unable to kick Ned at this point and clear up the red road.

Ned was an asshole, I had a nice lead in that race but it's impossible to move the blockers out of the way there, they just get wedged further between the chimneys if you hit them. It's happened more times since that race too (the losers are learning how to be bigger annoyances from each other ), now I always take a look on the map on the start/finish to straight to see if there are any stationary dots before picking a direction.

btw I had a message after that race (I presume from you) but forgot to reply, turns out I'm as much of a dick as Ned.

 

[GT5Power]

I honestly get a bit disappointed at the lengths some people will go to make sure you don't win, and the anger those same people exhibit when you do win (over the mic, and in text message if they don't have a mic)...I haven't run into this as much as some other people here as I don't frequent public lobbies very often. And it's not just this game; as numerous other people have already said here, every game where you race cars has this issue.

Not just every game where you race cars; every single competitive game ever has had, has and will have this issue.

Public lobbies by the way make for awesome stories to be posted on here. You should try them; clean players will always be around to pleasantly surprise you, but toxic players will never cease to exist either. If you beat one of those marksman-rifle-wielding, first-person-dancing invisible-torso brats, you should know that their tears, which just so happen to have an unusually high concentration of sodium chloride, are delicious.

 

[sesselpupser]

Last night I got online just before midnight, I'd only intended to play for a little while but someone in the lobby asked the perennial question: "Cheetah or FMJ?".

I offered to let him test drive my Cheetah because I'm not a huge fan of it, he enthusiastically accepted, I went off on my own while he took it for a spin and a little while later he caught up to me to give it back and wouldn't stop thanking me.

A little later he invited me to his garage to show me his Cheetah, but while I was there I saw his 811 and asked if I could try it out. We drove around for a bit and he eventually invited me to his corporation, then we spent a few hours doing missions and chatting, he told me he'd just broken up with his girlfriend and had been getting over it with friends, games, alcohol and weed, but he was on his own and feeling down.

So I felt bad for him and instead of going to bed I just kept playing, at one point he said "you seem like a cool guy, thanks for playing with me", and it felt nice to be helping him out a bit with the loneliness (even though he was so high he shot an unarmed player helicopter down because it flew near me during a cargo run so he might not even remember me today).

Then I timed out and went to bed, at some time after 4am.

But yeah, having been in his position myself back when I was playing a lot of Destiny with @Terronium-12 and @Clark it felt like I was returning the favour, in a way.

 

[Sage Ages]

I spot a player with a bounty and meet them in an alleyway. Get the kill, pocket the cash, and drive off. Busniess as usual.

About 20 minutes later, I head out to Grapeseed to check on my business. Stupid mistake on my part for buying a property so far out to save cash.

I leave the building and instantly get blown up. This guy went and got his friend, drove all the way to Grapeseed, and then proceeded to bombard me with RPGs and grenades for about 10 minutes. Over a $5000 bounty.

I wasn't even mad, but confused to why he would even put the effort to go to an obscure part of the map and empty their entire weapons inventory on me over a single kill.

 

[JR98]

First day on GTA Online in about a month and made some real progress. After earning 200K to buy a clubhouse I did my first mission which was to meet with some Vagos for a drug deal. The cops then showed up and I shot my way out of there and headed to the drop off but soon after on the basic bike a Frogger started chasing, and I saw he had a friend in a road vehicle trying to catch up. I started shooting with my AK while he tried killing me with blades, but we both survived until the airfield before his friend showed up and, after being knocked over by a rock, killed me and got the stuff to the drop off.

I then joined another session which had just @Flash_Sweden doing headhunter (or whatever it's called). Soon after he created an MC while I was doing a weapons shipment and we ended up going to his clubhouse (which was in the same place as mine). Soon some other GTPers joined and we got into some clubhouse missions which were a lot of fun and earned me plenty of cash (enough to buy me my own Zombie Chopper). Soon after we were escorting some limos to the strip club when someone from the GTP crew (no idea who they were) started shooting at us and ended up blowing up the 2 limo's we were escorting as well as killing 2 of the VIP's. We killed him a few times before he left us alone (or maybe he left the session?) and we got back to the missions, before I was disconnected not long after.

 

[AnthonyD1993]

Going to bring this back. Everything mentioned happened yesterday.


Best Part 1: Had a guy try to kill me and my friends. I wound up going 17-3 against the guy and a friend went 40-10 (give or take a couple deaths of my friend). Guy ragequit. Some girl also tried to kill me and I went 5-1 against her after I got caught between her and someone else trying to kill me. She left the lobby after I picked her off of one of the cranes in the map from a rooftop. Other guy in that firefight left because my friends chased him out of the lobby. Being able to actually safely play in public lobbies on the PS3 is a good thing.

Worst: After I took a break for a few hours, I found out that some guy was trying to start drama again and was trying to throw me into it. He is salty because I just joined a crew he wants to join again but can't due to being in poor standing with the crew leader. This guy was at one point in the crew but got kicked for hanging out with idiots. He ironically is now in a crew that is run by a guy that jumped him in a lobby. That guy and his friends happen to be in poor standing with myself and several friends as well which adds to the irony.

Best Part 2: After aborting a public lobby attempt at night, my friends made a private lobby to play in. We started by doing missions and later did races. I hosted so I set the races to really stupid conditions and also did rally races in the rain with traffic. It was an enjoyable train wreck that had everyone laughing. We ended with Lazer Quest in the rain on GTA (or as I call it, Lazer Warzone ). That took 15 minutes with 2 laps and had a whole lot of dive bombing and other nuttiness. I ended the night by doing a Mallard race and took second after nearly being dive-bombed at the finish. My other friends were also trying to dive-bomb themselves. I then left the lobby laughing hysterically as I got around for bed.

 

[STI9]

So I am doing MC work with @Flash_Sweden @250 GTO @Sting @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Leadfoot530 @Tex. We are delivering weapons from McKenzie airfield to Tequila-la-la and we need to drive this smashed up Lost Burrito. On the way there we had an escort of 2 Hydras, a Savage, and 3 gun wielding bikers.
It's quite a site to see that kind of co-ordination following a beat up van whilst constantly destroying every single vehicle in front of us. Almost as if there wasn't any traffic at all

 

[JR98]

Went online to buy some clothes for my main character and ended up being involved in a 20 minute gunfight, which I won pretty easily.

 

[Flash_Sweden]

So I am doing MC work with @Flash_Sweden @250 GTO @Sting @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Leadfoot530 @Tex. We are delivering weapons from McKenzie airfield to Tequila-la-la and we need to drive this smashed up Lost Burrito. On the way there we had an escort of 2 Hydras, a Savage, and 3 gun wielding bikers.
It's quite a site to see that kind of co-ordination following a beat up van whilst constantly destroying every single vehicle in front of us. Almost as if there wasn't any traffic at all

You forgot a Buzzard, and the fact that we were the only ones in the lobby But you can't be safe enough

 

[jstickboy13]

So I am doing MC work with @Flash_Sweden @250 GTO @Sting @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Leadfoot530 @Tex. We are delivering weapons from McKenzie airfield to Tequila-la-la and we need to drive this smashed up Lost Burrito. On the way there we had an escort of 2 Hydras, a Savage, and 3 gun wielding bikers.
It's quite a site to see that kind of co-ordination following a beat up van whilst constantly destroying every single vehicle in front of us. Almost as if there wasn't any traffic at all

That was awesome I had one of the Hydra's fly just feet over my head while on my bike following the van. Been enjoying all the banter while playing too, I've been in tears laughing several times

 

[STI9]

That was awesome I had one of the Hydra's fly just feet over my head while on my bike following the van. Been enjoying all the banter while playing too, I've been in tears laughing several times

Do you have a mic?

 

[jstickboy13]

Do you have a mic?

I should, I'll have find where it ended up after moving a few months ago

 

[Sting]

So I am doing MC work with @Flash_Sweden @250 GTO @Sting @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Leadfoot530 @Tex. We are delivering weapons from McKenzie airfield to Tequila-la-la and we need to drive this smashed up Lost Burrito. On the way there we had an escort of 2 Hydras, a Savage, and 3 gun wielding bikers.
It's quite a site to see that kind of co-ordination following a beat up van whilst constantly destroying every single vehicle in front of us. Almost as if there wasn't any traffic at all

What you neglected to mention was that we completely broke you! I've never known you to have the freaking giggles so much. Besides I think it was one main Hydra which was me and Tex was mainly in a Savage.

That was awesome I had one of the Hydra's fly just feet over my head while on my bike following the van. Been enjoying all the banter while playing too, I've been in tears laughing several times

last night was some of the best hover mode flying I've ever done. I would have loved to have seen what my low passes looked like from your guys' position.

I should, I'll have find where it ended up after moving a few months ago

Get searching sucka!

 

[STI9]

"100%legitimate$ delivered the counterfeit money" when @Jahgee completed a sale from his MC business. Good fun in a public lobby fighting off 2 or 3 smaller MCs whilst doing MC work. At one point we were in a standoff at Vespucci beach, sniper battle with @Sting @Flash_Sweden @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Tex against 3/4 random griefers who were camped on the pier as we were on a Yacht.

 

[Flash_Sweden]

It sure was fun 👍 In the "I have to disband my MC and go
to bed but I'll join Jaghees MC and stay online for another 1,5 hour"-kind of way

 

[Sting]

It sure was fun 👍 In the "I have to disband my MC and go
to bed but I'll join Jaghees MC and stay online for another 1,5 hour"-kind of way

The best kind of way then lol

 

[250 GTO]

"100%legitimate$ delivered the counterfeit money" when @Jahgee completed a sale from his MC business. Good fun in a public lobby fighting off 2 or 3 smaller MCs whilst doing MC work. At one point we were in a standoff at Vespucci beach, sniper battle with @Sting @Flash_Sweden @Jamesyarders @jstickboy13 @Tex against 3/4 random griefers who were camped on the pier as we were on a Yacht.

It sure was fun 👍 In the "I have to disband my MC and go
to bed but I'll join Jaghees MC and stay online for another 1,5 hour"-kind of way

The best kind of way then lol

 

[Flash_Sweden]

Its not really a "best" moment, but it sure as hell wasn't a "worst" either.

I was given the "steal 20 vehicles" daily objective. And since I was in a public
lobby and didn't want to get a bounty, I decided to see if a helicopter counts. So I took a taxi down to the helipad by Vespucci. Well, it turns out that they do count:tup:

Just as I start to take off to go up to Sandy Shores and steal another, I see an incoming plane above me. Nothin happens. Well, it turns out that he bailed just before he had passed me.

So I fly north and finds 2 helicopters and a plane in Sandy Shores 👍 Just as I'm about to land, i see a swarm of bullets
raining down on one of the helicopters, followed by that and the other one exploding along with the plane. So, since I'm in passive mode, I just start hovering with bullets going through me, and missiles exploding on me. A Hydra (obviously) comes down, flying around me in hover mode, giving me all that it got.

After about 15-20 seconds of shooting at me, he gives up and starts going south again. I sent a friendly message, asking him if he has ever heard of passive mode. I get a reply saying something like "b:censored:h a:censored:s p:censored:y mode for a player that's level 300+" (he's 400+). I reply with "says the guy in a Hydra".

Now, the "fly low" freemode event starts. He's downtown. I'm still at Sandy Shores. He's getting 600 meters. I'm thinking "Ok, let's see what happens". So I leave passive mode, makes a 700 meter long pass in my helicopter, taking 1st place from him, only to return to passive.

And yes, the return of the Hydra. Trying to blow me up again

I get another text similar to the first one. I reply "Lol".

I decide to get a plane from LSIA. On my way down there, I get notification saying "XXX killed YYY, MMM, LLL and a whole bunch of players, minding their own business. After that he starts Headhunter.

So I call Pegasus to get my own Hydra and parachutes down to the NOOSE-building.

While still in passive mode, I fly towards him, assuming that he'll see the plane-icon on the minimap. About 20000 rounds of explosive ammo later, I'm pretty sure that he has seen me
So I just turn around, and start to follow him. He turns around and tries to take me down again...and again...and again.

Suddenly, his plane-icon disappears, and his blip turns into an "X", followed by "XXX died" 20 seconds after that, his Headhunter fails, and after another 10 seconds "XXX left"

I'm guessing he was a griefer that didn't like loosing HH and his Hydra because of a guy that didn't even fire at him

 

[Jimlaad43]

Daily Objective says "Capture - GTA"
Load up a session, steal a Hearse - OK sounds cool.
4 vs 4. My Level 105 is the highest level there, so I'm put with some lower ranked players to balance it out.
Lvl 8, Lvl 8, Lvl 8...
Spawn in and grab all the weapons possible and head towards the cemetery.
First person there, kill the NPC enemies, jump in the Hearse
Other team turns up and kills me
Respawn a fair distance away in a car, head back
See's my team mate is now in the Hearse
He heads back, I'm in the wrong place, so can't really help
Other team mates have got lost somehow, so it's him vs 4 moderately competent users
I make it to the group just as he's killed
Smash into the back of one enemy car, which skittles into two of the other enemy cars, squishing two guys.
Quick burst of bullets and I jump in the Hearse and park it to victory
Round 2
Start at the other place, Pistols only for some reason...
Still make it to the funeral first
Use car as a battering ram on the shooty NPC's
Jump in Hearse just as opposition turn up, so naturally I die
Respawn and return to the cemetery to watch my team mate get shot while driving the Hearse
One pistol round in the killer's head and I'm alone next to the Hearse
Get in and go
3 enemy cars around me, one driver has a Micro SMG
Brake check them a few times to avoid their PIT manoeuvre's and other legit ramming techniques
Somehow dodging bullets all the time
Hit a tree near the canals while changing radio station (Screw Radio Los Santos)
As the hearse spins after the impact, the back clips an enemy car with two players in it as they tried to attack me
They're knocked off course, fly down the cliff and cartwheel in a ball of flames off the top of a house and into the canal
-No sign of my team mates for a while now
Tree absorbs an awful lot of bullets
Get going again, only to be spun a few times by the enemy, who appear to have run out of bullets completely.
I now have 4 cars on my tail
Finally, a team mate appears to help me!
Nope, he manages to park right in front of me
Survive the assault only due to lack of weapons
One enemy drives off towards our base
3 are still harassing me
I miss the turning into the base and have to take a narrow alley
Brake to make the sharp left and get rear ended
Hearse does two rolls
Lands on all 4 wheels pointing in the right direction
Mash the throttle forwards towards the end zone
See enemy too late
Riddled with bullets I die
Hearse still has momentum
1 vs 5
I won

To this moment I still have no idea where my other two team mates went

 

[Johnny1996]

Okay okay. Funny story here at least in my book that just happened to me. I'm in Sandy Shores and in a "be an :censored:hole to everyone" mood. I spawned from exiting a mission I just completed at the airfield, again in Sandy Shores, and blew up someone's personal vehicle a few yards away. A minute or two later someone is racing toward me in a supercar, presumably the owner of the car I blew up. He starts to chase me and I'm running for my life in my own supercar with a speed advantage. I wasn't sure where to go so I set my GPS to my Del Perro apartment and make my way there, with the other player still hot on my tail. Along the way I threw down some proximity mines but the other guy missed all of them. Finally I made it to my apartment and drove in the garage.

After I'm in the garage I wait a minute to see if he leaves but he doesn't so I enable passive mode and exit my garage. He laid down a trail of sticky bombs and proximity mines going all the way across the entrance to my garage. Since I'm in passive mode, they have no affect. Then he hops in his car and tries to mow me down but to no avail. I was able to dodge him and he ended up killing himself and blowing up his car with his own bombs. He respawns a block away and this is where things get good.

I run over to him and give him my "thumbs up" taunt. He then calls in his Insurgent and hops in. I'm still in passive mode but there's a wall enclosing a parking lot just a couple feet away so I hop up over it, missing the other player trying to mow me over again. Then I see a ledge as he's coming toward me again. I hop up on this ledge just in time and miss the player yet again. I have room to walk around so I stay there. The player continuously rams the wall trying to climb up it or something but it doesn't work. Then he pushes a car against the wall to use it as a ramp to get him on the ledge. After several failed attempts he begins to blow up cars near me which doesn't work as I'm still in passive mode (and Quickplay Action taunting him all this time). Finally he gives up and speeds away with the police on him to go try his luck with someone else. The whole thing lasted about 15 or 20 minutes.

I can now say I've successfully trolled someone while I was in passive mode. Never thought that would happen.

And on a side note, I got my first first kill, first last kill and first victory ever all in the same death match earlier.

 

[Stavingo]

When you do Executive Search, lure two rival organisations in and you low-key maul them to bits because you're never on radar.

Absolutely hilarious to see players get hit instantly and just go into combat roll mode as soon as they get pelleted with bullets, even better when you use a silencer and they have no idea where they're getting hit from

Gosh I miss this game

 

[SomePlayaDude]

I never thought I got myself another entry of..

SPD Productions presents..

an SPD Bounty Tale..
​

starring SPD!(duh)​

On this episode:

"Impudence of people going into the unknown that is.. the Imponte Ruiner 2000."
(also starring:"CYLINDER OF DEATH")



So, once upon a time (today you bleedin' idiot SPD), I decided to try jumping off Chilliad to reach the naval docks or the airport. It's been proven that you can glide pretty far with this car, and till recently it's really bothered me that I was so focused on getting money more than try out my SecuroServ runner-up in the wild.

With that, I head to Paleto Bay with something else so I don't have to shoot rockets at people or police. Here's the car..

Spoiler: The car

And since he's in no way vital in what's to come, we'll leave it at that.
But I still love you, my Classique.


Fast forward to the top of the mountain, I prepare my descent, aim, and jump. All is smooth sailing, until..

CRIMINAL DAMAGE is about to start.

And with that, I lose the thrill to glide, and know easy money is to be made.. the best part is how the Ruiner is already gliding. Reacting, I swap course to Fort Zancudo straight away!

But since the gliding took away 2 minutes of prep time, and I'm not even halfway down, I do a suicide dive and landed by the dirt road. Unfortunately, a CEO seems to be hanging around there and is getting in a Buzzard he spawned.

I may be a peaceful guy, but when I approach, the heli got the lock on me, and I have to reply with one of my own ordinance. One epic miss, and one KITT rocket later..

*BOOM*
Ohh, they're going ta have to glue you back together.. in hell!!


With that small pump of adrenaline, I jumped in Zancudo as the event began. No cops, and a Rhino so happened to stop in front of the barracks and park there. Yes, park. As if in the driver got out the moment I see it.

insert evil pose thing..

Thank you, Ice Bear.

But isn't the title "an SPD Bounty tale".

We'll get to that.

The Criminal Damage turned out to be me curbstomping everyone. 2nd place got only 1.5 million.. heh. Say hello to 8 million. But what I noticed is a pair of random players that appeared to be buddies (to be referred to as Spongebob and Patrick A and B) decided to.. emm..

..use Mallards to do a kamikaze attack on the CYLINDER OF DEATH. It hit, but.. what did they expect?

30 seconds left on the timer, and I head back to my Ruiner and jump out of the base before I get surrounded by other cylinders of death. Funny enough, where I jumped out (which is where everyone jumps out during the vehicle mission) is where A and B so happen to be.

So I left them be and headed back to export a car, only that A for some reason decided to trail me.

By the time I reached the beach homes, A, having received a bounty for stealing a random traffic car, caught up to me, since I'm feeling pretty good that he's going to.. pratatatata

Wait.. you hear that?

pratatatata

Is this what I think this is?

pratatatata

Yep. This stupidity is either comedy gold, or straight up schadenfreude. Either way, I'm laughing.

So just like that, I do a quick 180, jumped, and bombarded his car from above.

*BOOM*
You're dead. That's good. Amen.

*egoraptor whining person* But isn't the title an SPD Bounty ta-
*KO PUNCH*
OK SHUT UP! NOW IT IS, HOLY SMOKES!

B, on the other hand, didn't take to it kindly, so he put a measly 1k bounty on me by the time I got back in town..

So, the tale of the tape
two level.. something, I dunno.
VS
Me, a nobody who's now got "shot a Hydra with a Ruiner" as a notable award, I guess.

Haven't had such odds against me for a while now. Time to brace for impact.

Alright, first order of business is either do it old fashioned and hide in the subway, use a Hydra..

Never mind the usual plan, I'm only against 2 guys who probably have no idea how to deal with me, coupled with that mallard BANZAI show earlier..

The rest of the room are literally not ready to face me at all, and the one guy who can.. (who's also the one I shot down earlier..) He's cool, apparently, seeing that I let him and his associate do their crates in peace.

My first order of business is to head to my warehouse to restock missiles. But, A caught up to me by Davis, and upon his YOLO charge, there was a missile above his head.

*BOOM*
Today ain't yer day, pancakes!

B decided to appear with a helicopter.
Three problems:

It's a Maverick.
I still have missiles.
NO CHANCE! *Corporation/McMahon theme song here*

*BOOM*
*smug Vince McMahon face here lel*

They're not exactly good at the PVP, aren't they. But I have no more missiles after a quick hustle with the cops, and I'm not willing to get spawn killed when I get out of my warehouse.

But thanks to the earlier event, I got inspired to do this plan B: go get a Rhino. But since they were still on me, I head to the parking lot near the hospital and jumped across rooftops. A was close, and spammed a random amount of grenades to the roofs to get me.

It's like a GTA equivalent of Assassin's Creed templars trying to get assassins. It was epic. If only I recorded it.. D'OH!

While I managed to reach the tank, it seems A and B are planning something new. It's not try military equipment, but it's more come at me bro with more random pedestrian vehicles.

I drove to the LSC by Supply Street, and A came to the place, expecting my Ruiner, only that..

TANK.

*BOOM*

So far, all kills are in explosions. That's not intended at all.

A, now realizing to stop spamming grenades, armed his Homing Launcher the next time we meet.

Purposely parked by the place you get the Kuruma in Fleeca Heist, we clash. And here's how it went.

A appeared!
A used Homing Launcher!
A is getting pumped!
Rhino used cannon!
*BOOM*
A one-hit KO!
A fai- i mean GOT REKT!!

B was late to the party, but I came out from Lester's place and saw him in come to me in an Oracle. He fired bullets at me, while reversing, and expecting a swift escape. Only that..

*KABOOM since I know you're tired of seeing the same BOOM*

Well, after this, I have no idea where A is, but B took it upon himself to end me and got on the overpass so I couldn't get him. That's the first thing they did that was actually pretty good.

Issue is, he parked his Kuruma next to the railing. And one knows how many of them have that GT Wing on them. So it became not a GT Wing, but a GT Bullseye!

*BOOM*
I have squashed you, like bug!

The Rhino now nearly dying, I jump out to get my Ruiner that just got it's cooldown beaten. But this time..

A and B actually concede and stop pursuing me.

Thank you for understanding. I always know how self defense is such a rottweiler sometimes.

The room eventually thinned down until I got back to exporting more cars, and beat the bounty over time. Eventually, I know this small, intense experience after a long long time of being unchased has to be recorded somewhere. So.. I'm back, I guess?

Note to self: I should try to parachute off Chilliad with a Ruiner 2000 again.. this time in a private room.

FIN.

 

[GT5Power]

Jet griefer appeared in a room yesterday. I went after him in my Hydra but kept missing and eventually he shot me down. I survived and started firing at him with a homing launcher. 10 rockets later I found out that he was purposely lagging so he could avoid every single missile... What a toxic player.

According to his username he is 32 years old, with a K/D of 30.21. His rank was ridiculous. So apparently he spends all his time on GTA. I really pity people like him.

 

[DK]

So, after about 7/8 successes, I recorded my first failed Import mission. It was a Roosevelt Valor, and I got chased down by two arseholes in a Buzzard. After the hell those choppers put me through while fetching an ETR-1 this morning, I was in no mood to deal with another one, but they managed to deal $32k worth of damage before finally blowing me up about 500m from my Warehouse in El Burro Heights.

At least I got more kills against them than they had against me.