Confession Booth

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Actually hearing them isn't much better.
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Oops, I didn't express myself correctly.

That last sentence was meant to be a summary of the entire post. What I meant to say is that hearing voices of people that aren't there, due to anaesthesia/med/drips, is probably not the same thing but it's not a pleasant experience to see somebody (my father) go through that proces.
 
I do have something to say that I've never said before:

All my life, I never felt like I belonged to one nation. I am only American to show citizenship, but I do not identify myself as American.

"The world is my country, all mankind are my brethren and to do good is my religion." - Thomas Paine
 
Confession: I sometimes think about what it would be like to kill, or to have killed a person.

I am in no way saying I think about actually taking a life, just that I wonder what goes through the mind of somebody who has killed another either in a case of manslaghter or 1st degree murder.

Again, let me state: I don't think about killing folk in the sense that I would ever, just the thought process of somebody who has or who plans to for whatever reason. It fascinates me. Ever since I unavoidably killed a dog and felt untold grief I've wondered how it would feel if that dog was a human being.
 
I'll come out and say I don't have many friends. But my situation is a weird one - i'm incredibly popular, but unpopular. Id say out of the 1200 people in the school, 800-1000 know who I am. But I don't actually have many friends, or not many that I can gauge whether they are a friend or not. I have about 8 people I regularly talk to, but only 3/4 are ones I would count as friends, and I only have one really good friend.
 
I know a lot of people know who I am but that doesn't mean I associate with them all. I think its quite normal 👍
 
I'm a really difficult friend to have. I spend a lot of my time being angry and I rarely forgive people. I'm quite bad for holding grudges against people.
 
hsv010
I'll come out and say I don't have many friends. But my situation is a weird one - i'm incredibly popular, but unpopular. Id say out of the 1200 people in the school, 800-1000 know who I am. But I don't actually have many friends, or not many that I can gauge whether they are a friend or not. I have about 8 people I regularly talk to, but only 3/4 are ones I would count as friends, and I only have one really good friend.
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Better to have a few really good friends you can really count on than a lot of friends whom are not really friends.

I don't know if "friends with benefits" is correct when one has male friends and and one is hetero. Get my drift? :D
 
kikie
Better to have a few really good friends you can really count on than a lot of friends whom are not really friends.

I don't know if "friends with benefits" is correct when one has male friends and and one is hetero. Get my drift? :D
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My thoughts as well. My one good friend is someone who's been in my class for 4 years, but we only got close about a year ago. Nice to have someone you can always talk to and rely on 👍
 
I build strong emotional connections to random girls who speak to me, even if its only a few words. It does die down almost straight away, but it makes me feel like I'm going to be a stalker in the near future.
 
INEEDNAWZZZ
I build strong emotional connections to random girls who speak to me, even if its only a few words. It does die down almost straight away, but it makes me feel like I'm going to be a stalker in the near future.
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This happens to me in a way but not that often
 
Eks
I speak to my pets in doge. :indiff:
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no.jpeg


:p
 
I am afraid of losing my parents. Things change, time pasts, and before you know it, you have grown up and your parents have grown old. Generally, I am afraid of growing up, I think.
 
It seems that I'm in a "like" giving mood today.

I need all the strenght I can get to not click on @Beeblebrox237 signature. So far, I managed not to click it.
 
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I'm not convinced that my best friend sees me as his best friend. I find it difficult to gauge though - we talk every night, and he, as always, talks to me as if we are good friends. However, he has a lot of other friends, and they are all the ones he will mess about with and have a good laugh with. Since i'm the only one of his close friends who isn't like that, I feel like we fall into different categories, so it's hard to judge things between us. To make it more complicated, we've been in the same class for 4 years, yet we only got close about a year ago. I'm just unsure about where I stand.
 
Some NSFW language. You should definitely watch it though.


No one really knows what type of OCD I have and no one really knows it at all. Ugh.

I've been going through this problem since 7th-8th grade. Now, some people without OCD may think that it's just about having things in the right place and being very anal when people move your things but they're very wrong. I've been un-medicated for the past years and It's made life unbearable. I don't have a problem with having my room extremely messy or having things in the right place, instead my mind goes rampant when I make eye contact with someone. I'll look, look again, look again, again and again. This has ruined me, my grades, my relationships, and everything in-between those things. Sometimes it got to the point where I just wanted to flip the off switch. In my drawing and photography classes I would just keep my head down during demonstrations and it would really make people wonder about me which would also have my mind racing. Sometimes I'll just reduce down to tears in class because I just want the **** to go away but it just lingers and teases me. I'll generally leave my classes feeling like **** because I fear that I scared a person off. I'm not really known for who I really am, except I'm known for some socially awkward guy that doesn't really speak in class and stares at people for no reason. This **** is unbearable. I didn't bother talking to my previous doctors about this because I was just so damn scared of taking medicines or going to therapy or something like that. Finally I'm deciding to get some help from a new doctor but It will take some time and any potential relationships are just down the **** because of this disorder. I've lost a-lot of people and I'm not even sure my current relationships will even last.. This sucks.

Sorry for the wall of text. Just what I've been dealing with for a long ass time.
 
I just hung my foul smelling, weeks old sock across the AC to dry them. The room is empty now but when everyone returns to sleep I think there will be some seriously unhappy campers.

I have to dry them somehow, right? They can't go outside because it is raining and they would poison the local wildlife.

They are incredibly foul smelling sock.
 
I don't like being around my father. For almost 30 years I've watch him get angry at the smallest things and all the outbursts that ensue and it's just so hard to deal with anymore. The older he gets the more illogical the outbursts are. Today he was yelling about the cold and slamming doors and throwing stuff. I can't really afford to move out but I can't deal with this anymore. Constantly being around someone who flies off the cliff unexpectedly at anything, and quite frequently. Honestly, it makes me hate my life right now. I got enough to deal right now besides spending half my day in more of a prison work release program than a real job just to come home and hate every waking moment there too. From the moment I get up to the moment I fall asleep I literally loathe being conscious. I hate to say that about him, but it's just so hard to deal with anymore. I sometimes wonder what I did to end up in the situation I'm in. Why won't anybody hire me for a decent job? I have a good résumé and have never been fired. Why can't my father just keep his anger to himself like most people? Sometimes I'd rather be homeless than go to that god forsaken job, then come home to yelling and flying inanimate objects.
 
I have a strong liking for cats. I havnt even told my friends, but I mean like. After my cat got put down, I cried for days, I just want a new cat.
 

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