Funny/Strange News Stories

[Crazy Taylor]

Seems to me this story is right up there with the Flat Earth crowd in terms of believability:
https://nypost.com/2018/07/23/pro-gamer-dumps-worlds-sexiest-weathergirl-for-more-call-of-duty/

For information purposes only, this is the girlfriend he's giving up to play videogames:

View attachment 753593

The fact being 'the world sexiest weathergirl' must have perks. Such as having some decent money, or then there's other ways like modelling. That posterior must cash it's own checks.

 

[TenEightyOne]

The fact being 'the world sexiest weathergirl' must have perks. Such as having some decent money, or then there's other ways like modelling. That posterior must cash it's own checks.

He's better looking and richer than her so the loss is relative if it's just the materialistic side of the story that some people want to look at

 

[baldgye]

He's better looking and richer than her so the loss is relative if it's just the materialistic side of the story that some people want to look at

Extra extra! Read all about’it; Two people you don’t know break up to focus on their careers!

 

[Tired Tyres]

Seems to me this story is right up there with the Flat Earth crowd in terms of believability:
https://nypost.com/2018/07/23/pro-gamer-dumps-worlds-sexiest-weathergirl-for-more-call-of-duty/

For information purposes only, this is the girlfriend he's giving up to play videogames:

View attachment 753593

High maintenance. Leave and do anything else at all. Maybe?

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Transgender woman claimed to gain supernatural medium powers after change. LINK

 

[TenEightyOne]

Police officer sprays protesters during a stage of Le Tour de France and accidentally gets the peloton too. Le BBC.

 

[TexRex]

Police officer sprays protesters during a stage of Le Tour de France and accidentally gets the peloton too.

Aww, I was going to post that.

Le BBC.

Well done.

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Nestle lose fight to own kit kat shape. Nestle get catch a break here

Bbc

 

[TenEightyOne]

Nestle lose fight to own kit kat shape.

Not their own shape though, and Kvikk Lunsj is nicer

 

[Touring Mars]

Man with no penis admits sexual assault - and possibly the most inappropriately named Fiscal Depute in history...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/20...sexually-assaulting-two-women-thought-having/

Spoiler

Carlos Delacruz, 35, pretended to have sex with the women using an unknown instrument while he was in a relationship with them. Both his victims complained of "extreme pain" during intercourse with Delacruz and were forced to stop and suffered from thrush afterwards.

Fiscal depute Kirsten Cockburn told the court Delacruz had been in a relationship with both women at separate times between May 27, 2013 and May 14 last year. Ms Cockburn said: "The accused was in a relationship with one of the women between May 2013 and January 2016 and they first had sex in May 2013. "She believed she was being penetrated by his penis. The accused does not have a penis.

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Man with no penis admits sexual assault - and possibly the most inappropriately named Fiscal Depute in history...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/20...sexually-assaulting-two-women-thought-having/

Spoiler

Carlos Delacruz, 35, pretended to have sex with the women using an unknown instrument while he was in a relationship with them. Both his victims complained of "extreme pain" during intercourse with Delacruz and were forced to stop and suffered from thrush afterwards.

Fiscal depute Kirsten Cockburn told the court Delacruz had been in a relationship with both women at separate times between May 27, 2013 and May 14 last year. Ms Cockburn said: "The accused was in a relationship with one of the women between May 2013 and January 2016 and they first had sex in May 2013. "She believed she was being penetrated by his penis. The accused does not have a penis.

He has nothing on the man with the Golden Gun then?

 

[TenEightyOne]

Man with no penis admits sexual assault - and possibly the most inappropriately named Fiscal Depute in history...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/20...sexually-assaulting-two-women-thought-having/

Spoiler

Carlos Delacruz, 35, pretended to have sex with the women using an unknown instrument while he was in a relationship with them. Both his victims complained of "extreme pain" during intercourse with Delacruz and were forced to stop and suffered from thrush afterwards.

Fiscal depute Kirsten Cockburn told the court Delacruz had been in a relationship with both women at separate times between May 27, 2013 and May 14 last year. Ms Cockburn said: "The accused was in a relationship with one of the women between May 2013 and January 2016 and they first had sex in May 2013. "She believed she was being penetrated by his penis. The accused does not have a penis.

The Sheriff (Alison Stirling) isn't so well named either, if I remember the Karma Sutra correctly.

 

[TexRex]

Man with no penis admits sexual assault - and possibly the most inappropriately named Fiscal Depute in history...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/20...sexually-assaulting-two-women-thought-having/

Spoiler

Carlos Delacruz, 35, pretended to have sex with the women using an unknown instrument while he was in a relationship with them. Both his victims complained of "extreme pain" during intercourse with Delacruz and were forced to stop and suffered from thrush afterwards.

Fiscal depute Kirsten Cockburn told the court Delacruz had been in a relationship with both women at separate times between May 27, 2013 and May 14 last year. Ms Cockburn said: "The accused was in a relationship with one of the women between May 2013 and January 2016 and they first had sex in May 2013. "She believed she was being penetrated by his penis. The accused does not have a penis.

Holy hole in a donut is that story all manner of bizarre...

On a not unrelated side note, I believe it's called a flugelhorn.

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Zoo in Cairo paints donkeys to look like zebras. What an ass! Link

 

[Famine]

"Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'."

 

[baldgye]

"Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'."

This made me laugh out loud in a quiet office

A topiarist says he is having to make regular repairs to his hedge due to drunk people pretending to have sex with it.

 

[TenEightyOne]

"Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'."

You should never touch a lady's privets without permission.

Honestly though... that's a bizarre creation.

 

[Touring Mars]

"Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'."

The pearl necklace is a nice touch.

 

[TexRex]

The pearl necklace is a nice touch.

 

[LeMansAid]

Transgender woman claimed to gain supernatural medium powers after change. LINK

Would have been more fitting to have transitioned to intersex and become a medium.

 

[baldgye]

Roseanne Barr: I'm not racist, I'm a creative genius

 

[Crazy Taylor]

More McDonald's related news.

McDonald's employee beats up customer over a drink and unkind word to ones 'momma'.

Link. (NSFW, video contains fighting, blurred nudity).

 

[TenEightyOne]

Smiles crack at wise vagina. BBC English, BBC Pidgin.

 

[Touring Mars]

Definitely not a funny story, but definitely strange...

Swedish police kill man with Down's syndrome carrying toy gun: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-45050933

Now, call me suspicious, but how the actual hell does a severely disabled man end up on the streets at 4 am with a toy sub-machine gun?! You have to feel sorry for the poor guy, but I'm struggling to see how this was even possible - unless it was set up on purpose out of sheer malicious intent by someone else.

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Man does such unruly things in Redcar after monster drinking session.

Spoiler: Not totally safe for work.

https://metro.co.uk/2018/08/03/wome...eatedly-banged-penis-on-their-window-7792550/

 

[Touring Mars]

Another not funny story, but I did find the court artist's sketch particularly useful...

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...jailed-for-life-over-british-museum-bomb-plot

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Another not funny story, but I did find the court artist's sketch particularly useful...

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...jailed-for-life-over-british-museum-bomb-plot

If they have a face like that in court, they should keep the veil on.

 

[Crazy Taylor]

Women only network appoints male chairman

 

[baldgye]

Another not funny story, but I did find the court artist's sketch particularly useful...

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...jailed-for-life-over-british-museum-bomb-plot

Did the defendants know that there where ghosts stood next to them?

 

[TenEightyOne]

German police save man from wild animal attack. BBC.