So...we need to talk about this new Civic.
Somebody in my complex just got one, a base model with the small wheels and plastic covers. It's a silver sedan. It's not a stand-out, that's for sure. Pretty plain, pretty Jane, pretty boring, would immediately get lost in any parking lot in America, probably the world. It's a car.
At least, everything behind the A-pillar is a car. The front end, however...
The nose of this thing is horrible
lmao. It looks ridiculous
. It's got a monstrous snout like a moose and deep-set eyes like a Neanderthal and a gaping maw below that. It's bad
man, it looks really bad. People keep saying it "looks like an Accord" and, um, I can only assume they've never seen an Accord because this Civic is nothing like it at all. The front of this thing is all sorts of not good in person. The small wheels aren't doing it any favors but the fascia is Neanderthalic (probably the best word I can come up with) no matter what wheels you put behind it. And I do mean behind it, because the front end sticks past the front wheels nearly two feet. It's atrocious.
So yeah, the aft 3/4 of the car are fine, inoffensive, adequate. The front is absolutely woeful. I feel bad that it was born that way and I empathize with the difficulties of parenting this Civic child...but damn I'm glad that ain't my kid.
Just watched this again to compare my observations and I noticed something interesting: At no point in this video is a "parking lot" view of the front end shown. Every single angle of the front end is either far away, or taken at door-handle-height (who the hell views a car from the hip?) or both. That video is not
representative of what this front end looks like when you walk up to it and see it. This is one of the ugliest cars on sale today, full stop. The headlights are literally underneath the rolling brow, like a caveman.
And the problem I'm worried about with the hatch is that while the hatch itself looks great it does nothing to address the dopey pre-human fascia.