You don't have much imagination, do you?
The Daewoo Matiz, with 50hp, take 17s to reach 60mph.
The Daihatsu Move, with 42hp, takes 19.1s, with a peak of 81mph.
The 750cc FIAT Panda, packing 34hp, takes 21.5s (78mph maximum).
The 850cc Seat Marbella, essentially a clone of the above FIAT Panda, takes a staggering 23.2s.
These are all topped by the most awesomenest People Carrier ever. Whilst the above cars all have the excuse of sub-litre engines, this car comes with a 2.3 litre diseasel engine and an even slower 2.0 diseasel. These engines push, respectively, 75 and 67hp - yes that's 32.6hp/litre for a vehicle produced only in the 1990s (1993-1996). Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the high-performance, can-carry-7-but-only-very-slowly:
Nissan Serena
2.3 diesel: 0-60mph in 26.5s, 84mph
2.0 diesel: 0-60mph in 31.0s, 81mph
You think 0-60mph in 12s is slow? Pffft.