Well after talking with my ex a bit finally found out that she just wanted a friend to talk to but keeping herself open to someone else when they come her way. Doing a bait and switch on me is not the best. After today I probably won't even talk to her ever again. Good think there is a block feature.
Now with an edit. She didn't mean it that way. She doesn't want to jump into a relationship right away. Although after talking more I kinda found out that she kinda hinted on more into a relationship with the mentioning of cuddling and sleeping with me. (Without the you know what) but still. I feel like I am complexed on what I should do. :/
Well I guess this is about the perfect time to add my part.
I thought maybe my ex would of did something but trying to get something out of nothing is still nothing.
Complains how there is no one to talk to when things go bad, and yet out of all that she couldn't of did one thing and messaged me? It's like she doesn't care about anyone except herself on how she wants this, wants that. Can't have this, etc. Complains about being alone sucks and wants someone there. It's like if you want all that just be straight up and get out there and get what you want. Don't just sit there doing nothing complaining about it.
So now I just need to figure out how I can go forward with someone else right now and hopefully maybe meeting up in a few days and who knows after that, maybe I can actually sleep decent and move forward and do the things I want to do instead of listening to my ex complain about all the I can't have this and that stuff.
She's not interested. She told you she's not interested. Right now she's sitting by her phone or other device and scratching her head saying,
"I told him I'm not interested, why does he keep texting me?". She clearly wants you as a friend only, take it or leave it, and move on. It's harsh but it's the truth.
Seems most likely. In all honesty, I realise my OP seemed very 'wah wah, why can't I have what I want?', but in reality I'm not too bothered if she isn't interested or anything. I'd just wish she'd be straight up about it.
If only women could be straight up and honest about it.
She was straight up, you guys just aren't listening. Women, generally anyway, don't come right out and say,
"I'm not interested". You know why? Because they are sensitive and don't want to hurt your feelings. They also know that men are stupid, especially when they are young, and often want to then have a conversation like,
"What? What do you mean you're not interested? Why not? What's wrong with me?", and then they get drawn into a long discussion with no happy ending, where the dude usually gets hurt, then gets angry, then starts calling them names etc. So instead they just drop hints.
"I don't want a relationship I just want a friend", is a big one but any variation of that means the same thing,
"I'm not interested in you".
Wanting her to communicated differently won't make it so. That's how it is, it doesn't change much at all so you better get used to it. If she's interested you will clearly know she's interested. If you are in doubt at all, she probably isn't. That doesn't mean to say you shouldn't pursue a woman for a while because sometimes that works too, but you do it with an attitude of it being a fun challenge with the full realization that the odds of success are low and most importantly, you don't get emotionally invested in the outcome and don't misconstrue the hints she's giving you.
Here's some free advice for anyone that is in the,
"I want to cuddle and maybe sleep with you but none of that sex stuff", situation. Most of us have been there and done that. Next time it happens, and you are interested in her for more than that and it isn't some kind of traumatic situation where she really just needs a friend, do this. Cuddle, touch each other, get some wood, start poking her with it, and see what happens. Sometimes, exactly what you want to happen, happens. But if she gets upset about it or says,
"I just want a friend, I don't want that", then get up out of the bed, apologize, and tell her you just can't do it because she's so darn attractive there's no way you can lie beside her like that without getting wood. You respect her and respect her wanting to just be friends, but we can't be friends like that it's just too hard for you. You're a man, you have urges, she's a beautiful woman etc. Or words to that effect. Trust me, it works. She might change her mind, it happens, or she might not, but she'll respect you much more as a man and she'll see you in a different light. She'll see you as a horny and virile man, not as a neutered, non-sexual, safe, androgynous friend.
