The General Relationship Thread

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phillkillv2
Ask her why she says those things to you.

Asking her if she likes you as a boyfriend may be jumping the gun.
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Thanks. Will report back after that.

I've noticed that she already had 5 boyfriends in her relationship history and now she's single again. Now I usually get teased easily so whenever someone says that to me like I posted earlier, I'm shocked to hear that because I was like "Are you serious?" Not that I dislike joke though.
 
So I am now down to 2 potential people.
One that is about 50 minutes away and the other is 1800 miles away.
The other one half way around the world wanted a more personal one and decided in the best interest after just shy of a month to end it.

The one that is closer, is having possibly some second thoughts, unsure although she has been dealing with some other things of school and personal reasons.

The other one that is in California is more understanding and everything but is still far away.
 
Alright. Like I said before thanks to @phillkillv2 advice, I will report back. Anyways here's what happened:

I told her that we should meet in 7-Eleven and she happily agreed. So then we sat down and had our snacks then eventually I finally asked her like what @AJHG1000 said then she said

"Look, I was only saying those because I like you as a special friend. Not because I'm bored and crazy but its a sign of saying thank you for helping me during times where a college subject is really hard and I needed help. Why?"

Then I said,
"Sorry if I asked you because I'm just curious why you're calling me that. But I should also thank you for answering my question though."

Then she gave me the privilege of calling her "bae", and "best friend".

I should thank both phil and AJHG for giving me advice. :cheers:
 
FilipinoGTUser1
Alright. Like I said before thanks to @phillkillv2 advice, I will report back. Anyways here's what happened:

I told her that we should meet in 7-Eleven and she happily agreed. So then we sat down and had our snacks then eventually I finally asked her like what @AJHG1000 said then she said

"Look, I was only saying those because I like you as a special friend. Not because I'm bored and crazy but its a sign of saying thank you for helping me during times where a college subject is really hard and I needed help. Why?"

Then I said,
"Sorry if I asked you because I'm just curious why you're calling me that. But I should also thank you for answering my question though."

Then she gave me the privilege of calling her "bae", and "best friend".

I should thank both phil and AJHG for giving me advice. :cheers:
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Turned out good. Real smooth.
 
TJ13
So I am now down to 2 potential people.
One that is about 50 minutes away and the other is 1800 miles away.
The other one half way around the world wanted a more personal one and decided in the best interest after just shy of a month to end it.

The one that is closer, is having possibly some second thoughts, unsure although she has been dealing with some other things of school and personal reasons.

The other one that is in California is more understanding and everything but is still far away.
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I think the one that is in Cali is kinda having fun with this because of the distance. She doesn't really take it seriously, in the sense that "What's the worst that can happen?"

She'll be personal and willing because you're 1800 miles away. Unless you're willing to go there, there's nothing that's going to happen.

The one that's closer is afraid of entering into a relationship due to the short distance. This "thing" could become "something". Hence tbe doubt.
 
Team THRT Drift
I think the one that is in Cali is kinda having fun with this because of the distance. She doesn't really take it seriously, in the sense that "What's the worst that can happen?"

She'll be personal and willing because you're 1800 miles away. Unless you're willing to go there, there's nothing that's going to happen.

The one that's closer is afraid of entering into a relationship due to the short distance. This "thing" could become "something". Hence tbe doubt.
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The cali one, is well wanting more and if had a way to me she would, although it's not cheap getting from there to here or here to there.

The closer one isn't so afraid but is just going through a lot where school is having an issue and then with some family issues where one of her grandpa's brother's son and wife have been getting involved in her "personal" life and it's been going with it on facebook too. (With that she want's to get that taken care of before really doing a lot more) The doubt is that if she gets too involved with me, it could be like a lot of things not only for her but then would end up doing what they are doing to her, to me then.
 
Well my "girlfriend" is cheating on me, so she's about to be my ex. Then, probably no more relationships for me. Just the find a girl you think looks good, take her home, hit it and quit it. After the last two relationships, I dony have the mental capacity to do another. I almost killed myself over the last one, and this break is probably going to make me an alcoholic.
 
FWS_666
Well my "girlfriend" is cheating on me, so she's about to be my ex. Then, probably no more relationships for me. Just the find a girl you think looks good, take her home, hit it and quit it. After the last two relationships, I dony have the mental capacity to do another. I almost killed myself over the last one, and this break is probably going to make me an alcoholic.
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Dude, stay off the drink. And can I just say this line of thought:
Just the find a girl you think looks good, take her home, hit it and quit it.
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Is pathetic imho. You need to cool off a bit first before you do anything stupid or reckless.
 
Y
Obelisk
Dude, stay off the drink. And can I just say this line of thought:

Is pathetic imho. You need to cool off a bit first before you do anything stupid or reckless.
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Yeah, I used to think it was pathetic too, until I got my heart ripped out multiple times.
 
FWS_666
Y


Yeah, I used to think it was pathetic too, until I got my heart ripped out multiple times.
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Try being me:

Obelisk
I've been with two girls in the past six years or so that both clicked. The problem is I'm a bloody idiot when it comes to relationships and they both hate my guts now...But let me break this down, because I'm willing to admit this.

So, girl 1. Met her through a animation program/website we will refer to as Hatena, since the service has long since been cut. The two of us were on and off for three years, and every single fight started with her violently disagreeing with something I unwittingly said. It got so bad that I just shattered mentally and emotionally by the end of the third year. The worst part about it is, she liked me a hell of a lot better in person.

Girl 2 was also through Hatena. She and I got along famously, since we were both gamers and dorks. We were very close. What happened here...Well, it really hurts me to admit this in such a public place because I try to be good, but...I started becoming abusive and didn't realize it. Yes. I ruined the wonderful relationship I had with her because of my own obliviousness and stupidity. But by the end of it, she became the abuser and I just decided to get out of there because she found one of those, uh..."fudge"boys and started trying to rub it in my face.

But, well...I'm basically an idiot with relationships.
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And the worst part of this? I still feel like I'm at fault for all of it. Even in a few places where it really wasn't my fault.
 
FWS_666
Well my "girlfriend" is cheating on me, so she's about to be my ex. Then, probably no more relationships for me. Just the find a girl you think looks good, take her home, hit it and quit it. After the last two relationships, I dony have the mental capacity to do another. I almost killed myself over the last one, and this break is probably going to make me an alcoholic.
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Don't worry. Just relax. It's not like its the end of the world for you once when she cheated. Just take a break from having relationships first then once you're ready, go ahead. :cheers:
 
Obelisk
Try being me:



And the worst part of this? I still feel like I'm at fault for all of it. Even in a few places where it really wasn't my fault.
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I won't go into the reason my last one got so screwed up because it's stupid and embarrassing, but it was all my fault. Bad enough that she cheated and i knew I deserved it. Now I just feel like I deserve being cheated on and stuff, but doesnt make it any better and doesn't mean I'll stay, which is why I'm leaving this one. Her "really good friend" was taking pics with his arms around her and head on her shoulders, now she has his initials in her IG with a heart beside them. I told her if she didn't want me anymore to just tell me and it'd be a lot easier on my depression and anxiety, but of course that's too much to ask.

FilipinoGTUser1
Don't worry. Just relax. It's not like its the end of the world for you once when she cheated. Just take a break from having relationships first then once you're ready, go ahead. :cheers:
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Don't really want to be ready to go again. Lol would I rather be in a relationship with a girl I love than to just go pick up some girl to have sex with (which I'll be unsuccessful at anyways, but that's beside the point)? Yes, but it wont happen. Maybe its just because the last two were long distance, but no one here likes me unless I meet them on social media first, since I look 100x better in pictures.
 
FWS_666
I won't go into the reason my last one got so screwed up because it's stupid and embarrassing, but it was all my fault. Bad enough that she cheated and i knew I deserved it. Now I just feel like I deserve being cheated on and stuff, but doesnt make it any better and doesn't mean I'll stay, which is why I'm leaving this one. Her "really good friend" was taking pics with his arms around her and head on her shoulders, now she has his initials in her IG with a heart beside them. I told her if she didn't want me anymore to just tell me and it'd be a lot easier on my depression and anxiety, but of course that's too much to ask.



Don't really want to be ready to go again. Lol would I rather be in a relationship with a girl I love than to just go pick up some girl to have sex with (which I'll be unsuccessful at anyways, but that's beside the point)? Yes, but it wont happen. Maybe its just because the last two were long distance, but no one here likes me unless I meet them on social media first, since I look 100x better in pictures.
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Try a dating website. They have an awful lot of hot, local singles looking for you.

[/joke]
 
FWS_666
Well my "girlfriend" is cheating on me, so she's about to be my ex. Then, probably no more relationships for me. Just the find a girl you think looks good, take her home, hit it and quit it. After the last two relationships, I dony have the mental capacity to do another. I almost killed myself over the last one, and this break is probably going to make me an alcoholic.
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Just don't.
I had the same mindset when I broke up with my last gf, it was alright for the first few months but then I started to not feel alright mentally speaking because deep inside me I knew that it was not right to do that, and I was perfectly aware that the only thing I want is a stable relationship with someone who's really worth it.

Just reconsider your life goals for a few months and just let things happen.
 
So i broke up. Less than a month, can you believe that ? It's my fault though. I did the stupidest mistake of my life at the wrong time.

We just had a fight 2 days ago but yesterday we decided to try it again. In less then a day i managed to screw things up to eleven. We had this small fight yesterday night and i want to text my friend about what happened. The dumb thing was, i mistakenly, stupidly sent it to her. She was asleep back then but that mistake i did made me decided that we can't force this relationship when everything is just not going our way. That's the last straw for both of us, she also think it's for the best that we just break up.

God i can't believe i'm so stupid mistakenly sending that to her.

Feel like crap honestly, i'm not gonna find any relationship and i'll just enjoy being single.
 
GTboyz
So i broke up. Less than a month, can you believe that ? It's my fault though. I did the stupidest mistake of my life at the wrong time.

We just had a fight 2 days ago but yesterday we decided to try it again. In less then a day i managed to screw things up to eleven. We had this small fight yesterday night and i want to text my friend about what happened. The dumb thing was, i mistakenly, stupidly sent it to her. She was asleep back then but that mistake i did made me decided that we can't force this relationship when everything is just not going our way. That's the last straw for both of us, she also think it's for the best that we just break up.

God i can't believe i'm so stupid mistakenly sending that to her.

Feel like crap honestly, i'm not gonna find any relationship and i'll just enjoy being single.
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Hey, you'll be singing a different tune in a month's time.

Now my turn.

I work as a parking lot attendant at a huge store. My particular department is awfully small, and lately I've had a ton of hours. A coworker of mine, a girl of college age, and I have found a bit of common ground: She's a big fan of pick-ups. I've been talking with her - when we're scheduled together and it's slow out - about a possible replacement for her beat-up Dodge Dakota. Right now, I just see her as a colleague and I'm trying to learn more about her where I can. She's come to me to ask me a few questions about cars out in the lot and a tech question**. Any suggestions on how to go forward?


**She asked me how much a lightly used camera was worth (I'm an IT major) and I looked over the images. I got her a pretty good deal on a high end Canon. She also asked me about a strange-looking mini-SUV that randomly popped up a few days ago. Turns out, it was an Isuzu Vehicross that was lifted. I wish I snagged a photo.
 
GTboyz
So i broke up. Less than a month, can you believe that ? It's my fault though. I did the stupidest mistake of my life at the wrong time.

We just had a fight 2 days ago but yesterday we decided to try it again. In less then a day i managed to screw things up to eleven. We had this small fight yesterday night and i want to text my friend about what happened. The dumb thing was, i mistakenly, stupidly sent it to her. She was asleep back then but that mistake i did made me decided that we can't force this relationship when everything is just not going our way. That's the last straw for both of us, she also think it's for the best that we just break up.

God i can't believe i'm so stupid mistakenly sending that to her.

Feel like crap honestly, i'm not gonna find any relationship and i'll just enjoy being single.
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Nothing wrong with being single. No one up your ass about where your at. No one trying to sneak through your private ****. No one you feel obligated to talk to when you just don't want to talk to anyone. Plus, you can spend all your money on YOU, and not someone else. I used to wonder why guys wanted to be single. Why they just used girls. Now, it's pretty clear. They use is, we use them, everyone is happy. Deep down, most of us want a real relationship, but those are basically non existent with social media being so big now. I'm just going to enjoy my single life. If someone comes along wanting to be with me, they have to prove they're worth it, and if they want to control me, they can get out.
 
FWS_666
Nothing wrong with being single. No one up your ass about where your at. No one trying to sneak through your private ****. No one you feel obligated to talk to when you just don't want to talk to anyone. Plus, you can spend all your money on YOU, and not someone else. I used to wonder why guys wanted to be single. Why they just used girls. Now, it's pretty clear. They use is, we use them, everyone is happy. Deep down, most of us want a real relationship, but those are basically non existent with social media being so big now. I'm just going to enjoy my single life. If someone comes along wanting to be with me, they have to prove they're worth it, and if they want to control me, they can get out.
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You and @GTboyz both need to go sit in the corner and blow off steam.
 
FWS_666
I'm fine. A little pissed off, but mostly just done with relationships. Nothing wrong with wanting to be single and not having someone hover over me 24/7.
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I get that. I, er, kinda mis-read the "used them" line and thought you were talking about yourself. I've been in the same place as you since January. I really just don't care if it happens to me or not. But making an effort where you think it's possible to find a good partner is worth the risks. I mean, you have until the day you die to find someone. I dunno about you, but I'd rather die with my partner than to die alone.

Anyways, before this gets even more morbid.

Take the time off. You need it for your own sake. And then give it a few months and just keep an eye on the things going on around you. You'd be surprised at who you pick out when you look around.
 
GTboyz
but being that was my first break up, it felt painful than i thought it would be.
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We've all been there. My first girlfriend (See quote elsewhere in this thread) made me mincemeat basically. It ended up being a brutal series of break-ups and get-togethers. It was less a relationship and more her kicking me around like a soccer ball.

The best thing you can do when a break up happens is to talk to someone as soon as you can.
 
Obelisk
We've all been there. My first girlfriend (See quote elsewhere in this thread) made me mincemeat basically. It ended up being a brutal series of break-ups and get-togethers. It was less a relationship and more her kicking me around like a soccer ball.

The best thing you can do when a break up happens is to talk to someone as soon as you can.
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Yeah, planning on talking to my best buds tonight. It was brief but still painful. The thought of disappointing someone that cares about you leading to this broke me down. Doesn't help with my anxiety problem too.

But yeah, i'll get by this with a little help from my friends (i'm sure you guys know this reference)
 
Obelisk
I get that. I, er, kinda mis-read the "used them" line and thought you were talking about yourself. I've been in the same place as you since January. I really just don't care if it happens to me or not. But making an effort where you think it's possible to find a good partner is worth the risks. I mean, you have until the day you die to find someone. I dunno about you, but I'd rather die with my partner than to die alone.

Anyways, before this gets even more morbid.

Take the time off. You need it for your own sake. And then give it a few months and just keep an eye on the things going on around you. You'd be surprised at who you pick out when you look around.
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One saying that I got off of Donnie Darko will always stick with me. It is, "she said every living creature dies alone."

GTboyz
I am blowing off some steam, and i'm a little fine now.

@FWS_666 yeah i know being single is awesome but being that was my first break up, it felt painful than i thought it would be.
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The ones that'll get you is when you've been dating for close to a year and then things just fall apart and you have no idea where it started going wrong. Then you keep thinking how you could've done things different, but it's too late. The love is gone and you feel empty. After a while, though, you just go numb. It gets to be nothing more than an inconvenience. Yeah, it hurts like hell, but your just like, "whatever. I screw everything up anyways. What's new?"
 
FWS_666
One saying that I got off of Donnie Darko will always stick with me. It is, "she said every living creature dies alone."



The ones that'll get you is when you've been dating for close to a year and then things just fall apart and you have no idea where it started going wrong. Then you keep thinking how you could've done things different, but it's too late. The love is gone and you feel empty. After a while, though, you just go numb. It gets to be nothing more than an inconvenience. Yeah, it hurts like hell, but your just like, "whatever. I screw everything up anyways. What's new?"
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Dude. Try three years.

That relationship was dead two and a half years in and I dragged it out trying to breathe new life into it.

Edit: @GTboyz talk with them, do what you need. Like I've said to FWS, just give it a few months and keep track of the social dynamic around you.
 
GTboyz
Yeah, planning on talking to my best buds tonight. It was brief but still painful. The thought of disappointing someone that cares about you leading to this broke me down. Doesn't help with my anxiety problem too.

But yeah, i'll get by this with a little help from my friends (i'm sure you guys know this reference)
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I've got anxiety and depression problems. If it starts getting to where you worry constantly, get out immediately. The last one almost killed me because I was worried every second of the day. It'll destroy you faster than just breaking up ever could. I mean, I wont go into details, but I thought about suicide daily, and often had a "cure" in my hand ready to use it at least once a day.
 

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