Indeed, life ain't fair for a lot of people on this planet.
This depression I'm in since the end of February is the worst depression I have had. But for some reason, I finally understand completely why I'm having this life. All the life puzzle pieces have come together and the picture is complete now and it is all my fault that I have this miserable life. It all started at the age of 14 when one guy in school decided to ***** up my life and started to bully me, call me names and make ridiculous every time he could, even in class. After this Wherever I went, wherever I was, total strangers started to call me names as well. Many times they yelled across the street and every time it hurt like hell, every time I died a little bit inside. I became anxious and depressed but didn't know it. I never told anyone and kept it to myself for many years. Even my friends (neighbours) joined the party of name calling. When this one guy started it all in school, the bullying went in the quantum field and because everyone and everything is connected, everybody started to make my life a living hell. You know, Einstein's spooky action, quantum entanglement.
I started to feel bad about myself. Created a huge minority complex, which I still have and lost all my self-confidence. Created chronic anxiety and a chronic depression which I still have today.
But if I started thinking about this even more, during these last couple of months, I came to the conclusion that it is all my own fault. I didn't do it on purpose of course but the fact that life started to be unfair was all my fault.
I know for sure that it is the way I reacted to this pestering, which went on until my early twenties. I created my own misery by doing nothing about it. By making it a problem, make myself vulnerable and let everybody get under my skin. This made me into who I'm now.
What I'm trying to say is that life hasn't been fair to me at all but I created the personal reality myself, so in all fairness, it is my own fault that life aint't fair. I never did anything about these problems (traumas) and kept on going without finding help. But I didn't know any better.
So sometimes it is your own fault that life isn't fair, but in other cases, it is absolutely not your fault at all and that makes it a tragedy.
Enough rambling.