The Random Story Thread

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So Tyrone went down to Comptons local pawn shop to pick up a set of clubs. He walked into the store and spoke with the man behind the counter and asked him.........
 
call in a couple of hard pipe hittin brothas and get medievil on your ass." So the store clerk quickly replied..............
 
What was Tyrone to do? He had to think, and think fast. His 40 was almost empty and he knew if he didn't get his ***** a gift, she'd beat his sorry arse. So he went to the next best place, a place of..........
 
But porn and vibrators wouldn't do it for his hoe. He needed a better solution. That's when he noticed a crack baby on the street corner. He walked up to him and asked.......
 
Cool Tyrone thought. This was the best advice that he had heard for quite some time. He happily strolled away with his new plan in hand. So I don't need to get that blizatch anything for her birfday! Tyrone went down to the park to get the latest scoop and he saw nucklehead out there..............
 
beating down some punk arsed *****es. "yo home boy, whats up". nucklehead stopped beating down the ***** and replied "go **** yourself you mother****in cornboy" tyrone couldnt have some punk talkin **** to him so he pulled out his 9 and
 
started to blaze away at nucklehead. But Tyrone was a horrible shot and had already had a 40 of the OE 800 in him, so the first few hollow points missed. So he steadied his aim and that's when......
 
That banana was thrown by Tyrone's hoe! She said, "Nig ga, get yo gat and pop a cap in his ass before I whoop your cornrow havin ass into a.......
 
... and then she paused. Now, it's not like Tyrone's ho to pause in doing anything. Ever since childhood she'd been impulsive, destructively quick to act and judge, spewing vulgar lines of hatred to anyone daring enough to look her in the eye. This time was different though. Maybe it was just my perception but I could see the lines on her face... lines of age, like the deepening ruts that grow into the side of an old barn's wooden boards. Time had come to a stand still for just one imperceptible span of infinite time... and I was staring directly through to the other end. The world was no longer relevent here. I had finally realized my true fate, and it wasn't the fate of Tyrone's ho's deepening and sunken crack addict face. I could make time irrelevent, exist outside it, and within at the very same moment.

No sir, no more bananas for me.
 
:)

one day a lepher was working at mcdonalds and one of his fingers fell into the deep fryer. rather than tell anyone he...
 
just kept hoping it would burn up and dissapear. after several hours the finger was still there so he decided to put it in
 
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