Funny/Strange News Stories

[Mikey]

They were never going to be able to get enough of a slice of the market, to build up a base there...

Their chance of earning a crust is stuffed now.

 

[Touring Mars]

Concerns grow for Domino's former Head of Operations in Italy as some fear he may top himself...

 

[Mikey]

Domino's former Head of Operations in Italy

You mean Papa Ronnie?

 

[Joey D]

This is a mighty odd award:

Woodland Trust 2022 Tree of the Year contenders revealed

Conservation charity, The Woodland Trust, selected the trees with a team of experts and the public.

www.bbc.com

Although, I do wonder if the judges have tried to come up with a winner before and just ended up stumped. Maybe if they turned over a new leaf and branched out more, it wood be an easier decision. I'm sure there are a bunch of trees just pining for the award.

 

[sirjim73]

This is a mighty odd award:

Woodland Trust 2022 Tree of the Year contenders revealed

Conservation charity, The Woodland Trust, selected the trees with a team of experts and the public.

www.bbc.com

Although, I do wonder if the judges have tried to come up with a winner before and just ended up stumped. Maybe if they turned over a new leaf and branched out more, it wood be an easier decision. I'm sure there are a bunch of trees just pining for the award.

The winner gets to take a bough...

 

[Mikey]

The winner gets to take a bough...

The others are just taking the pith.

 

[ROAD_DOGG33J]

Florida woman arrested for hurling uncooked steak at boyfriend of 20 years, police say

A Florida woman was arrested and jailed Sunday on a domestic assault charge for allegedly throwing a piece of uncooked steak at boyfriend during argument, police said.

www.foxnews.com

I'm assuming he doesn't like rare steak.

 

[Liquid]

Golf courses in France are exempt from a hosepipe ban so activists fill a golf course's holes with cement. Hilarious.

Defending their exemption from the water restrictions, Gerard Rougier of the French Golf Federation told the France Info news website: "A golf course without a green is like an ice-rink without ice."

What a stupid analogy to make during a climate crisis.

 

[Famine]

Golf courses in France are exempt from a hosepipe ban so activists fill a golf course's holes with cement. Hilarious.

And fruitless. It takes literally five minutes to change the location of a hole, and it's usually done almost daily anyway - depending on the course - to even out foot traffic (and therefore wear) across the green.

Next time nitromors the whole green.

 

[JKgo]

File this under "Can Only Happen In Africa, Probably":

A golf course wakes up to a "definitely the most unique fairway hazard you'll find".

 

[Liquid]

 

[Sprite]

Now there is a movie that needs to be made.

Margo Robbie & Rebel Wilson to star with Taika Waititi to direct.

Rowen Atkinson & Simon Pegg the bumbling cops trying to stop them. Atkinson having uncontrollable phobias of everything and Pegg obsessed with making a name for himself before he retires but is just useless.

 

[Famine]

Oddly not what I had earlier...

Item #3 was the invasion of Ukraine.

 

[Liquid]

The reason why Dogging was trending was equally hilarious; Dan Walker put in an amazing typo when he decidd to tweet about his latest TV show - Dogging For Treasure

Hilarity ensues.

 

[Famine]

Man trying to steal rare white lion cubs from zoo mauled to death by lions, surprising nobody:

Ghana zoo: Lions maul man to death in Accra

He may have planned to steal two rare white lion cubs which have become a big draw for the zoo.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Blitz24]

Man trying to steal rare white lion cubs from zoo mauled to death by lions, surprising nobody:

Ghana zoo: Lions maul man to death in Accra

He may have planned to steal two rare white lion cubs which have become a big draw for the zoo.

www.bbc.co.uk

Would have been better off had the security guards caught him. Oh well, might be a Darwin award contender.

 

[Liquid]

Another day on Normal Island.

 

[daan]

Another day on Normal Island.

It's what you do.

 

[Roo]

Another day on Normal Island.

Daily Mail exclaiming EXCLUSIVE as if it's a story any other outlet would care to publish.

 

[TexRex]

Another day on Normal Island.

 

[Mikey]

You'd think by now they'd've caught the buzz.

 

[sirjim73]

You'd think by now they'd've caught the buzz.

It's been all over the Bee Bee Cee.

 

[Mikey]

It's been all over the Bee Bee Cee.

Not to mention the A.P.R.E.

 

[Touring Mars]

Another day on Normal Island.

Strange bee-hive-iour

 

[Famine]

Outside ass-istance...

Chess world rocked by rumours of anal beads and artificial intelligence

Fans speculated that anal beads could transmit messages.

metro.co.uk

 

[Liquid]

I can only hope the bishop had nothing to do with this one.

 

[Obelisk]

I can only hope the bishop had nothing to do with this one.

I was trying to come up with my own wisecrack at this, but I don't think anything I can say can top this.

 

[Mikey]

wisecrack

They should have checked him for wireless devices when he got there but I guess they didn't sphincter do it.

 

[TexRex]

 

[Obelisk]

That's one way to screw traffic.